Chief Inspector Maigret Visits London (3 page)

The car, with the two chief inspectors inside, was waiting for them around the next corner. They jumped in and the car sped off towards a coffee shop far enough away from Maida Vale to risk crossing paths with Nicole Vachon again.

‘I tell you, boss, I've never met anyone with such cold eyes as that woman had. She gave me the screaming jimmies,' Andy Gillespie confessed, between sips of cappuccino.

‘Sounds like you met the real Nicole,' Philippe said. ‘They thought I didn't know, but at HQ they called her The Ice Queen, and never was there a more appropriate name.'

‘Even the poor damn
dog
was afraid of her. She called him, but he wouldn't come to her,' Andy said.

‘This is not a game, is it? I treated it as if it was one… but now I see that… it's really, truly, real… '

Philippe was speaking to her but his voice was coming from a far-off planet. Or maybe, it was from somewhere deep under the sea. She couldn't hear him properly, and it was hard for her to breathe. ‘Darling, are you alright?' he asked again.

‘The reason the dog didn't come was because… and… of course that's why she looked at me that way. How could I have been so stupid? Now I've put everyone in danger.'

‘Megan, we're not following you.'

‘The dog wasn't
afraid
of her, Andy. The reason he didn't come is that his name isn't Max!'

‘But why would she say that it was, if it wasn't?'

‘She did it to warn me off. She must know who I am. For all I know she knows
everything
there is to know about me!'

‘
Max is your grandson's name,' Philippe said.

‘Yes.'

‘But how could she possibly know that, or anything else about you and your family?' Andy Gillespie asked.

‘Perhaps she's been in touch with your mother, Philippe, and… '

‘Never in a million years!
Maman
would never speak to her. She disliked her from the moment they met.'

‘Perhaps someone else in Paris would speak to her?' Andy persisted.

Philippe shrugged. ‘Maybe they would. Who knows?'

‘And maybe we weren't the only ones who were watching the arrivals at St Pancras on Friday night,' Chief Inspector Scott said. ‘Perhaps someone else saw you get off the Eurostar just like we did, Chief Inspector Maigret. Is there any chance your ex-wife was there and saw you?'

‘How should I know? I was looking for Megan not Nicole. I didn't even know she was living in London until you told me.'

‘Philippe, this is all
your
fault!
You
got us into this mess and now it's up to you to get us out of it!' ‘How can you say that, Megan? I wouldn't have gone anywhere near Scotland Yard if you hadn't made me accept the invitation to lunch.'

‘And it's very unkind
of you to mention that fact now.'

‘Enfants, enfants
,
play nicely,' the Met chief inspector said. ‘Instead of allocating blame let's concentrate on what we should do next.'

‘I can tell you exactly
what you should do next! You should put a police guard on Max and his family to keep them safe until all this – whatever it turns out to be – is over and done with.'

‘I can't commit the Met to that kind of expense, not without some compelling evidence. And maybe not even then, what with budget cuts and people losing their jobs. It's just not possible,' Clive Scott said.

‘Well, maybe
you
can't. But Chief Inspector Maigret certainly can. Philippe, I want Georges Martin and Jacques on the next Eurostar out of Paris.
They
will keep Max safe.'

‘Megan, I can't… '

‘Don't tell me what you can't do. I'm only interested in what you
can
do. And if you have to pay for them out of your own pocket rather than your wretched police budget then just do it.'

Inspector Georges Martin and Jacques didn't actually arrive on the
next
Eurostar because that proved to be impossible, even with the amount of official string-pulling, and calling in of overdue favours, that Philippe Maigret did over the next two hours. Nor even on the one after that. But in less than twenty-four hours they were both in London.

‘Thank you, Philippe,' Megan said, as they watched the new arrivals come through the gates at St Pancras. ‘I'm very grateful for everything you've done. I know it wasn't easy. How long can they stay?'

‘When I leave they'll come with me.'

‘On Sunday – you all have to leave on Sunday?'

‘We'll see. I'm still working on that little problem. There are a few more favours yet that I'm owed, and a few more strings to yank, so don't worry, my love. I've had a lot of practice pulling rabbits out of hats like this one.'

‘I owe you big time for this, don't I?'

Megan doesn't even begin to know the half of it, he thought, which is probably just as well. ‘And don't think I won't
enjoy
collecting on the debt,' he replied cheerfully.

In a spirit of the previously mentioned
entente cordiale
the Metropolitan Police had promised Chief Inspector Maigret, and his two-man team, their
“full cooperation within previously demarcated and historic international policing agreements”
which sounded like a deliberate oxymoron, if not total rubbish. And indeed it
was
since, in the event of an almighty cock-up, which was a definite possibility as no one knew how this arrangement would work, it supplied a ‘Get out of jail free' pass for everyone, up to, and including Uncle Tom Cobley of Widecombe Fair fame.

Megan attempted to explain the folk song to Philippe, but admitted defeat when it seemed even more challenging than the idea of collecting old books for parish fairs. Some things, she decided, just did not translate well.

The night before Inspector Martin and Jacques arrived in London Megan drove Philippe down to south-east London to meet Celia's family for the first time.

As they were packing an overnight bag Megan asked ‘Do you have any… er… means of being armed,
Philippe?'

‘Of course I don't, Megan! What do you think I am? Some damned
mercenary
?'

‘Not even the small revolver you sometimes wear strapped to the inside of your leg?'

‘How did you… ?' These words were followed by one of Philippe's famous long sighs. ‘No, not even that. Megan you've seen me dressing and undressing. Have you ever seen any sign of a weapon?' he asked earnestly, then wondered why she collapsed into helpless laughter. ‘Now what have I said?'

‘Oh, love,' she said, wiping the tears from her eyes, ‘sometimes you are just so unintentionally funny.'

Hmm,
technically
I haven't lied to her, Philippe thought. I actually don't have that revolver with me yet. And there's no need to tell her that I've asked Georges to bring it with him. Not yet.

‘Do you think they'll like me?' Philippe asked, as Megan drove over Vauxhall Bridge and pointed out the MI6 building on the Albert Embankment to him. ‘Of course they will. How could they not when you're so totally lovable, even if a little weird sometimes.'

‘I think I'm going to take that as a compliment,' he laughed, ‘we poor foreign beggars can't be choosers!'

It was nearly 4 o'clock when they arrived at the family house near Dulwich. The children were hovering in the front garden, waiting for their arrival so they could have tea and cake. For once in her life, Granny Meg was almost ignored in favour of the exotic new arrival.

‘Hi, sweetie pie,' Philippe Maigret said, kissing Celia on her forehead while he ruffled her hair. He'd done the same thing at Gare du Nord when she and Megan had left Paris, except that then he'd said
au revoir.

‘Are you actually a
proper
policeman?' Max asked, as they shook hands.

‘Have you actually got your gun with you?' Timmy asked, as he followed suit.

‘Yes, I am. And no, I haven't,' Philippe replied.

‘What about your handcuffs then? Have you at least brought them?' Timmy's friend, Luke asked.

‘Afraid not, young man, I left them behind in Paris.'

‘Don't be such babies you lot,' Celia scolded. ‘Let him get into the house before you start with your stupid questions!'

‘
Merci, ma cherie
,'
he said bending down to pat Inky, the family's black Labrador, who had decided it was time for her to get in on the act too.

After they had finished their tea Max asked, ‘Do you know how to play cricket, sir?'

‘I'm afraid not, Max, but I'm happy for you to teach me sometime. And please – when I'm with family and friends I'm just Philippe, not sir.'

‘How about having a lesson right now, Philippe?' Max said, striking while the iron was hot.

‘Oh Max, leave Philippe alone,' his mother said.

‘It's alright,
Madame
. Now is fine by me, and I see I'm not needed in the kitchen anyway.'

‘Good,' said Max leading the way into the garden, ‘because I have something to tell you and I don't want anyone else to hear.

‘What is it, Max?' Philippe said as they were setting up the stumps.

Max looked around carefully. ‘Are you really a detective? Do you solve crimes and other cool stuff like that?'

‘Yes, I'm a detective. And I do try
to solve crimes, although, between you and me, I'm not always successful.'

‘Do you shoot people?'

‘Not if I can help it!'

‘But have you ever actually
killed
anyone?'

‘Max, I'm being Philippe now. Remember? When I'm Chief Inspector Maigret I sometimes have to do things I don't like, including answering difficult questions. But when I'm ‘just Philippe' I can please myself. Now, what is it you wanted to tell me?'

‘I've found something important and now a strange man is hanging around my school, asking questions about me.'

‘And it's scary,
oui
?' Max nodded. ‘Have you told your parents?' Max shook his head.

‘Why not?'

‘Because… because… when I found the stuff I was somewhere I wasn't meant to have been.'

‘Fair enough, Max, none of us likes to get into trouble if we can help it. But if you tell me, I
can't promise that I won't tell them; not if I think it's something they should know. Do you understand?'

‘Yes.'

‘
Bon,
now exactly what was the stuff you found?'

Max looked around carefully again, then reached into his pocket and pulled out a wad of £20 notes. Philippe examined it carefully, fingering the paper, and smelling it. The notes were good, very good. But he had no doubt they were also counterfeit.

‘Is this all there is, Max?

‘No, there's a lot more. I hid the rest of it in the old au pair's room.'

‘And she didn't see you do it?'

‘Who didn't?'

‘The elderly lady, of whom you just spoke.'

‘No, Philippe, I meant it
was
the au pair's room when we had an au pair! We don't have one now.'

Mon Dieu
, now even the children are confusing me. Will I never understand the syntax of this language, he thought. ‘Oh, I see,' he said.

Max led the way upstairs to the top floor next to the room in which he and Timmy slept. He reached into the space at the back of the large wardrobe standing against one wall, retrieved a black leather briefcase, and gave it to Philippe Maigret. Inside, in neat bundles, was a large amount of money, all the same as the £20 notes that Max had given him earlier. He estimated that there was over £10,000 in all. All counterfeit.

Philippe thumbed through some of the bundles and saw that each note began with the letters EE followed by the same seven sequential numbers. Only the end number was different: it was either a 1 or a 7, indicating that two different sets of plates had been used to make the forgeries.

‘Is this all of it now, Max?'

‘Yes.'

‘Have you spent any of it?'

‘No.'

‘That's good, because if you had, you might be in trouble. This money is not real. It's counterfeit. Do you know what that means?'

‘Is it like Monopoly money?'

‘Not really. It's been made to look real, to fool people. But when someone gets one of these notes they're actually being robbed, because it is not what is known as “legal tender”. Can you see how the end number of all the notes in this bundle is a one? And in this bundle it's a seven?' Philippe said, flicking through the two bundles. ‘Real money,
genuine
money, has a different number on each and every note.'

‘Well, why don't the crooks make it the proper way?'

Philippe smiled. ‘Because that would cost too much, so it would defeat their purpose. Have you shown any of it to your friends, or told anyone else about it?'

‘No, you're the only one I've told.'

‘Why didn't you ask your parents to take the briefcase to the police?' Philippe asked.

‘I was going to at first. Then the man started hanging around the school and I got scared and I didn't know what to do. But when Granny said you were coming to see us I thought I'd wait to show it to you.
You're
the police, aren't you?'

‘Well, yes, Max, but only when I'm in France, not in England. Never mind, I'm sure we can sort this out without too many problems. If I walk you to school tomorrow morning will you show me exactly where you found the briefcase?'

‘Yes, of course. Can Inky come with us? She always does, and she was with me when I found the money. Actually she was the one who really found it. Are you going to tell my Mum and Dad?'

‘I'm not sure yet. But I will tell your Granny.'

Max pulled a face. ‘Why?'

‘Because she and I have promised that we won't have any secrets from each other,' he said. His conscience reminded him that Georges Martin was bringing a revolver from Paris which he had neglected to mention to Megan. I
will
tell her soon, he promised his conscience. When I decide she actually needs to know.

The announcement, at breakfast the next morning, that Philippe would walk to school with Max and Inky, while Celia and Timmy would be driven in Granny's car – which was usually considered a treat – triggered the most almighty kerfuffle in the household. Celia protested that
she
should be allowed to walk with Philippe too, since she had known him longer than anyone else except Granny. Timmy shouted and fumed and then joined Celia in a major sulky strop. Or was it a stroppy sulk? No one could be entirely sure but it was not pretty.

Even the further announcement that Jacques, Philippe's colleague and another genuine
policeman, and a favourite of Celia, would arrive at St Pancras later that day, and meet them at the school gate that afternoon, failed to soothe their ruffled feathers.

Finally Philippe decided to take matters into his own hands.

‘Children, please listen very carefully,' he began in his best court-room voice, ‘this is a very serious police matter, and that is why I have decided that it is important for me to walk with Max to school this morning. And your parents and your Granny agree.'

The children sat wide-eyed and silent. Good, Philippe thought, I've pitched my words just right and they're recognising the severity of the matter.

‘Two days ago, Max found something. What it was need not concern you at present, but it is something in which Scotland Yard will be most interested. And it may also be connected to another matter which I am investigating, which is why Inspector Martin and Jacques will be arriving soon to help me.'

And still his audience sat spellbound and silent.

‘There's one more thing I need to tell you. Jacques will be living with you for a little while. He will accompany you to and from school each day and he will also make further investigations in this area. Inspector Martin will help me in another area close to where your Granny lives. But what I am about to tell you now is the most important thing of all.'

Timmy gulped nervously and took another noisy swig of his juice. Crumbs, he thought, what's he going to tell us now?'

‘No one – I repeat
no one
– outside of this family, must know that Jacques is a policeman. Do you understand?'

There was silent nodding of heads.

‘Bon
,
that's very good.
Because if it were to become known that he was a policeman… ' he paused for effect, ‘his life might be in very great danger. Do you understand?'

The response was more synchronised nodding.

‘If anyone asks you who Jacques is, and why he is walking with you to school each day, you will say that he's a friend of your parents who is visiting from Paris.
Comprendre?'

‘That means understand,' Celia whispered helpfully to Timmy.

‘And,' said their father who had decided that a little levity was needed to de-fuse the highly charged atmosphere Philippe's words had created, ‘where do you think Jacques will sleep while he's with us?' He looked enquiringly at Timmy.

‘Dunno,' Timmy said gulping loudly again.

‘He will sleep in the elderly
au pair's room, of course!'

Everyone laughed, even Philippe, although the joke had been at his expense.

And ever afterwards that room was known, much to his chagrin, as ‘the elderly au pair's room.'

However, when Max showed him the place where he'd found the money, what Philippe saw there wiped the smile off his face. And it also made a thousand chills run down the entire length of his spine.