Conflicted (Secrets and Lies) (22 page)

Ethan turned towards a hotel that was near the beginning of the pier. My body was ready for anything that would happen in a hotel room with him but my mind still had a fraction of control over me. It screamed that I shouldn't be with him at all.

"You must lose whenever you play cards because your face exposes what you're thinking every time," Ethan teased with a charming grin.

"What do you mean?"

"It's not what you think Mia. I'm pulling into the hotel to valet my car."

Humiliated at my assumptions, I looked away. As we pulled up, the valet approached to take the car. Ethan got out to have a word with him leaving me alone in the car. I fumbled with my bags not paying attention to what they were discussing. It startled me when he opened the door for me. I grabbed my purse but he shook his head indicating to leave it.

When hopping out of the car, I took his waiting hand. It turned out to be a
very
bad slip on my part. I lost my breath. Fireworks exploded throughout my body. My entire body ignited as the sparks ran through every fiber of me. From my head to my toes, I was on fire. Avoiding any contact with him resulted in his touch intensifying every reaction my body has to him.

Just great.

Ethan held my hand snugly as he escorted me out of the car. Still dazzled by the softness of his hand, I barely caught the passionate look in his eyes. I saw a lot in his deep brown eyes but never that look. He felt this too.

Shit
.

Once standing, I wiggled my hand free. Ethan looked puzzled for a minute but dropped my hand. He motioned to the direction we were off to next. This was a bad idea. I was stupid for even being here with him but it was too late to turn back now. I had to figure out a way to keep distance between us. Allowing him to touch me again was flirting with more trouble than I could handle without screwing up.

We walked along the pier in silence. The only sound we heard was the light breeze that brought in the waves as they lightly crashed against the pier. It truly was beautiful down here. The lake went on for miles until you couldn't see anything but the water. The majestic shades of blue made you wonder what was out there to explore. Eager to break the silence, I looked over to Ethan who was deep in thought.

"Do you come down here often?" I asked softly.

His lips settled into a firm line. He took a deep breath with profoundness in his eyes. "When I need a break from life, I come here. It's a great way to heal an aching spirit."

Whoa. That is deeper than I was expecting from him.

"I can see how this place would make you feel that way. Where are we going next?"

His seriousness faded as a warm smile spread across his face. He pointed to a shop behind him. It was a rental shop for speedboats and lake gear. My jaw dropped at what he was proposing for today.

Ethan chuckled. "You're facial expressions are priceless. This is why I didn't tell you when you asked. I figured I'd get one hell of a reaction."

"Seriously, it's going to be freezing on the lake," I whined.

"Yes, we're going out there. You'll be fine. We'll get plenty of gear that will warm you right up," he insisted.

"And what, pray tell, are we going to do out there with a speedboat and this warm gear you speak of?" I questioned suspiciously.

"Wakeboard of course," he answered straightaway.

"Wakeboard!" I squeaked.

Ethan beamed. "Yes. Have you tried it before?"

"No. Something tells me that I'm just going to make an ass out of myself if I try it."

"You're going to learn today. It's the best kind of therapy for a troubled mind and soul."

My heart skipped a beat with his sincerity. As he gazed at me, a shy smile crossed my face.

"How so?"

"You don't have much room to think about anything other than the water, the boat, the waves, the board, and not falling on your ass."

"I've never done this before. I'm going to fall on my ass anyway," I muttered.

"I'm going to teach you. There isn't one person that I've taught that falls on their ass. Consider yourself lucky to be in the company of someone that will keep that from happening to you," he retorted, arching an eyebrow.

"Lucky...I was thinking more like crazy," I mumbled under my breath.

Ethan winked. "I'm a little of that too."

The desire across his face played into the overly amped up feelings coursing through me. Jumping in the water would be equivalent to taking ten cold showers. It was precisely what I needed to get everything inside of me back in check again.

"If I make an ass out of myself, you can't laugh at me," I demanded.

Ethan held up his hands innocently. I raised an eyebrow to get an agreement to that request.

"I won't laugh at you. I'm sure you will do just fine. Can we go in now or do you want to continue to debate it some more?" he asked sarcastically.

I nodded but stopped short of the door. "I don't have my purse with me."

"I already took care of everything so you don't need any money," Ethan said dismissively.

I gazed at him getting lost in his eyes. It reminded of the first day I saw him. His eyes had a way of sucking you in for whatever he wanted. Right now, they begged me to let the money go and enjoy the day with him. My insides twisted and turned with conflict. He really seemed to want to help me. Against my better judgment, I walked in to the store.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Ethan grinned so wide that his dimples were on full display causing me to blush. I had to admit it that it was nice to be the reason behind that smile. We strolled up to the counter where he greeted the clerk with a fist pump hello.

"Ethan, my friend, it's good to see you again. I have everything that you requested. The wetsuits are in the back but I left the swimsuits up to you." He paused, eyeing me. "I've found out the hard way that most women like to select that particular item themselves."

Ethan laughed as I walked away from them to find a suit. Passing racks of endless bikinis, it was clear that I wasn't going to find anything modest here.

"This just keeps getting better and better," I muttered.

It's your own damn fault for agreeing to something as stupid as this outing!

Shut up! I was well aware of what I got myself into at this point. I was ready to crawl into my brain and kick the shit out of my subconscious. I shrugged off that urge to focus on picking out a suit. I stopped to thumb through the bikinis. I went with one that was simple. It was sky blue with faded white stripes. I looked down to check the price tag.

"Holy shit! A person can buy an entire outfit for this amount."

"You're right but this is a pro shop so everything is top of the line," Ethan whispered.

He scared the crap out of me. My heart was racing as I took notice to his board shorts. He had a pair of black trunks with red lines that raced down the sides. Ethan scanned the suit that I picked out. He ran his tongue across his bottom lip. My mouth parched as I watched his tongue run back and forth.

"Nice choice. Are you ready?"

I swallowed back the lump in my throat and nodded. We walked to the back of the store. The back wall had stalls to try on items. The walls off to each side contained full-length mirrors. Ethan strutted over to a stall to change into his trunks. I went with a stall a few down from his and slipped off my heels, skirt, and blouse. I changed into the bikini and prayed that I'd be able to contain my bodily reactions just this once. I opened the stall to grab a wet suit.

I caught a glimpse of Ethan in the mirror. The sight of him instantly had me aroused and wet in all the right places. He had the most defined abs that I'd ever seen on a man. His arms had such definition that you could see veins popping out but not in a bad way. Tattoos covered almost every inch of his body. There were a few bare patches here and there but not many. I had been curious before but now they were on full display in all their glory and they were sexy as hell. His back had the same definition as his front. His trunks hung off his hips in such a way that I bit my bottom lip to keep from moaning. My vision sunk to his legs only to find that his calves were as tone as his arms. His body more than complimented his gorgeous face. I squeezed my thighs together. I've never wanted to have sex so badly in my life.

I didn't realize that Ethan was staring at me too. He was using the mirror to do it. In my daze, I walked out from the stall. My heart fluttered at the scorching look Ethan was giving me as he ran his eyes up and down my body. I wasn't sure if it was the embarrassment or how incredibly turned on I was but warmth surfaced throughout me. I broke our heated connection and stumbled towards the wetsuits. I grabbed the one that was noticeably smaller. I went back to change into it with a small smile on my face. I survived seeing him with next to nothing on without making an idiot of myself. When I left the stall, Ethan was leaning against the door that led back to the front of the store.

"What's that stuff for?" I asked, pointing to the items in his hands.

Ethan beamed. "I recall a lot of whining about how cold it was going to be so I grabbed you a hoodie. The bag is for the clothes you had on."

I gave him an exaggerated roll of the eyes and took the items. I went to grab my clothes and tossed them in the bag. Ethan headed towards the wakeboards. I pulled on the pink hoodie and met him by the boards. He'd already picked them out and his buddy was waiting to fit the boots on what had to be my board. His buddy tinkered with the boot to size it to me.

Ethan disappeared for a few minutes. I was happy his friend wasn't the least bit interested in keeping up conversation with me. I was far too busy trying to cool down my body. I was almost back to a respectable temperature when Ethan returned with sandals for us. He selected a pair for me that matched the hoodie. I nodded in approval.

He leaned against the front counter without breaking eye contact with me. His deep brown eyes entranced me and killed every effort I made to calm my body. Everything south of me clenched in anticipation of what came with next with him. I started to fidget and his buddy had to remind me to stay still. It was enough for Ethan to redirect his attention to checking out some boards but I caught him steal glances in my direction.

After my board was ready, we lingered in the shop while his buddy went out to the boat with the boards and life jackets. Ethan sure seemed like he got the royal treatment. Maybe it was just here but I suspected that it was like this wherever he went. After his buddy returned, Ethan met him at the counter to get the keys. I distracted myself with some of the cute clothes on the racks.

"We can stay here and shop but it's not as exciting as what's out on the water," he whispered seductively in my ear.

His warm breath trickled along my neck sending waves of desire through me. I hoped he didn't hear the heavy beats of my heart. I hastily marched past him towards the door outside. He caught me a few feet outside the door. Needing to cool down, I playfully tried to grab the boat keys from his hand. I wasn't fast enough because he deflected the attempt by grabbing my wrist. My breath wavered and I wrestled my wrist free from his grip. Ethan smirked and let go as he slid the keys into his trunk pockets.

"Mia, I've seen you drive a car. If I let you drive the boat, you'll have it flipped before we make it twenty feet," he joked.

"Are you implying that I'm a bad driver?"

It was another item to add to the never-ending list of observations he'd made about me. Maybe I didn't sense his presence as much as I thought I did. Ethan seemed to know way more about me than I'd ever consciously shown him.

"I'm not implying anything. I'm giving you facts. You drive like a bat out of hell. Animal life even knows it. They have the sense of mind to stay the hell out of the way when they hear your approach. It must be some special signal they have because I've never seen squirrels scurry out of a parking lot faster than when you're driving up," Ethan teased.

I bristled. "I'm not that bad of a driver."

"Yes, you really are. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings. I'm just saying," he defended.

"Whatever. Maybe I'm just practicing for my NASCAR tryout," I argued.

Ethan snickered. "Yea, sure you are."

He stopped at a section of the pier that had dozens of parked boats below us. Ethan trotted down the few stairs that separated the pier from a lower landing that docked the boats. I followed him to the fifth boat from the stairs. A grin spread across his face as he tossed his bag into the boat. Ethan held out his other hand to take mine. I passed my bag over while muttering under my breath at his inability to let my driving skills go.

"Get in the boat already so we can get out there and have some real fun. It will wipe that pout right off your face," he said, jumping from the dock into the boat.

"I'm not pouting."

"I guess that downward curl is all natural."

"Are we going to do this or what?" he asked impatiently.

Ethan extended a hand to help me into the boat. I took a deep breath before taking his hand. The soft and smooth sensation of his skin sent my heart rate through the roof. The sparks from earlier were stronger. Tingles spread throughout my entire body. I let my hand linger in his to savor his touch. Earlier I had been too busy mentally freaking out about why I shouldn't let moments like this happen. I almost missed the fact that holding his hand felt very comfortable - like it belonged there.

I held his hand tightly and jumped aboard. I looked at his waiting eyes that swam with a yearning for more. I straightened myself and settled into the passenger seat of the boat. Ethan relocated the boards and life jackets to the back of the boat. I rested my chin on my seat. I broke my gaze from staring at his fine backside long enough to notice that some other stuff was in the boat. When he turned around, Ethan caught the puzzled expression on my face.

"What?"

"Is that a cooler?" I asked, pointing to the box next to piles of towels and blankets.

"Yes. When you're on the water, you need to do it right. That means bringing refreshments and snacks with you. The other blankets are to keep warm. I seem to remember someone throwing a hissy fit over how cold it would be out there," he replied, using air quotes.