Conklin's Foundation (Conklin's Trilogy) (36 page)

The
guys came back with their usual drinks, but also had glasses of champagne in their hands.  I was amazed they didn’t spill either, especially Tyler. He was almost to the swaying point.

He held his hand out to me after setting down his drink and our champagne on the end table.  I took it, and we
both stumbled.  My heart was heavy as he pulled me into his embrace.  He was too out of it to realize something was wrong, and I hadn’t decided if that was good or bad.

“I’m so happy I have you,” he mumbled into my hair as we swayed.  The TV started counting down, and the rest of us quickly followed, grabbing our champagne and holding our glasses in the air.

Once we reached one, Tyler kissed me, trying to plunge his tongue in my mouth, but I quickly pulled away to take a drink of the champagne.  It was bubbly and burned my throat.  My eyes were as dry as my throat, and tears were going to be created soon.

When I turned my head
, I saw Jamie kiss Nathan’s cheek as he was howling happy new year.  Nathan was swaying worse than Tyler, and I was sure Jamie was going to have her way with him in a matter of moments.

Tyler downed his champagne
then the rest of his other drink.  He set both glasses on the end table and squeezed me, his mouth finding my neck.  I could hardly stand it.  All I could picture was him doing the same with Margo.

With a heavy lump forming in my throat, I managed to croak out, “I’m tired.  I’m going to go to bed.”

I broke from Tyler’s grip and continued on to our bedroom.  I could sense him right behind me then felt his hands on my hips.  I blinked slowly, knowing I wouldn’t be able to keep the word vomit from coming up my throat.

The second we entered our room, Tyler
, to my surprise, flipped me around and lifted me with ease.  He hungrily kissed me with everything he had, his fingers digging into my hips where his hands had hiked up my dress.  He moaned into my mouth as he ran us into the back wall.

Thud.

I lost it.

I let out a large gasp into his mouth, tears flowing from my eyes and down my cheeks, hitting his mouth on their way to the floor.

Tyler forced his head back, his body still pinned against mine as loud uncontrollable sobs escaped my mouth.  My body was trembling from fear of the unknown.

“Baby what’s wrong?  Shit, did I hurt you?” he asked overly concerned, his hands still
holding the backs of my thighs while his eyes were trying to focus.

“What
… did…” I was hiccuping and taking short breaths. “What did you do with… her.”

I was crying uncontrollably now. 

“What?” he gasped in confusion.  “Do with who?  What are you talking about Becs?”

My body convulsed as I tried to spit out the words.  “On Christmas…
I heard...I heard thuds.  Like you hit her against a wall.”

He dropped me down to my feet, but I collapse
d to the ground, hugging my knees.  Tyler fell as fast as I did, his hands finding my face, forcing me to look at him.  He was trying so hard to focus.

“No
… NO!” He almost shouted, rapidly shaking his head back and forth.

I cried even harder, my vision blurry from my tears and the alcohol.

“Do you really think I would fuck her when the woman I loved was waiting for me just down the hall?”

“Then what was that sound?
” I bawled.

Tyler leaned his forehead against mine, breathing heavier
than I had ever heard him.

“She pushed me,” he said quietly, holding my head firmly in place.  “She tri
ed to goad me to come after her like she always did.” 

Thud
number one replayed in my mind
. 
I cried harder.  Here it comes.  He was going to tell me how he fucked her.

“I pushed her away Becca
. She pushed me back.”

Thud number two. 

“I got mad, switched places with her and pushed her into the wall.  I had to do it twice because she fought back.” 

Thud three and Thud four.
I hated this fucking cougar.

“I told her to stop, that she had to leave
and never come back.  She said fine, that she would just go and see my father.  I got mad and hit the wall with my fist.”

Thud number five.

“Then I grabbed her arm and drug her out into the hall, practically threw her in the elevator.  Then I fucking remembered she was on my list of people who could come up to my floor without being buzzed.  I was so mad; I wanted her off that list instantly.”

It was as though the bones in my body evaporated as my head crashed into his shoulder, my arms flopping on his thighs.
  He cradled me, pulling me on his lap.

“I hate her.  I hate that she had you first,”
I sobbed.

He squeezed me tight
then pulled me backward, his eyes hardening.

“Because I like the fact you fucked that asshole Gage?  What about your pretty boy?  The one you would be married to if you didn’t put up with being th
at crazy bitch’s friend long enough for her to swoop in and take him?”

I cried harder, my lip trembling.  I wasn’t being fair
, and I caused this.  But Tyler wasn’t done.  A vein was bulging in his neck.

“Don’t you think it drives me crazy knowing they had their way with you?  That they have had you skin on skin?  Did you not use condoms with Gage too?  And what about all the other assholes after that Connor prick?”

I gasped, shocked and horrified he was bringing up my time in Florida.

“Yeah,” he bit while gauging my reaction.  “Don’t think I don’t think about your
phase
.  Do you even know how many guys there were?” 

His eyes bugged out in horror as he covered his mouth, realizing he had just said the most hurtful thing anyone had ever said to me.

I flung my arms, trying to get as far away from him as possible.  I was so embarrassed and hurt.  I never wanted to discuss my promiscuous past with him, and here we were, drunk and emotional, talking as though we would remember everything the next day.

Tyler firmly grasped my arms as I fought him.  “Becs, no I didn’t mean it!  I’m sorry, I’m sorry!  I’m drunk and being an asshole!”

I stopped fighting and shook my head.  “I was a whore.  A trashy whore and I can’t take it back, I’m so sorry!” I wailed. He was right to call me out.  There was no way I could erase that awful part of my past.

Tyler pulled me back to his chest, rocking me back and forth while I sat in his lap.

“You’d never be trashy.  I’m the trash.  I didn’t even talk to the girls I had been with besides Margo.  I was such an asshole in college, Becs.  I was trashy, not you,” he said gently in my ear, a hint of pain behind his words.  “I’m the one who can’t remember how many girls I have slept with.  I couldn’t tell you their names.  I can’t even tell you if I had slept with any of them more than once.  They were all one night stands, wanting a piece of the baseball player.  And I took it from all of them, whenever and wherever.  I treated all of them like they were shit.  Half the time I wouldn’t even get them off.  I used them and I didn’t care.”

“You don’t know how many people you have been with?” I squeaked.

He sighed and shook his head no.  “That’s not something I am proud of,” he whispered.

I couldn’t help but feel relieved he had a promiscuous past like I had.

I cried into his chest until my head started to un-fog.  I groggily stood up from his lap, reaching my hands down to him, helping him to stand.  He was still unstable as he stood.  His eyes were red and blotchy.  This was hard for him too, and he was way more drunk than I was.  I let go of his hands to walk into the bathroom, wanting to throw water on my face.

How did this night turn into such a mess?  I believe
d what he said about Margo and was kicking myself for waiting until now to bring it up.  I should have not pretended to be sleeping that night and asked him right away instead of slowly letting it eat at me the rest of the week.  So instead, our pasts blew up in our faces when we said they didn’t matter, yet we willingly brought them into the equation.  But now I was done and oddly felt at ease that he had no idea how many people he had slept with.  It really sucked to hear how hurt he was over my being completely bare with Connor.  But Connor was the only other one, and only if Tyler would realize I had truly only bared myself to him. 

I
washed the makeup from my face with water as Tyler watched me in the mirror. His demeanor looked broken.  My strong business man had his head hung low with bloodshot eyes.  I stared back at him through the mirror.  He slowly approached me, putting his hand on my exposed back.  He tilted his head down and kissed my shoulder ever so slowly, never taking his eyes off mine, trailing towards my neck.

I felt his hand on the back of my zipper,
fumbling to grasp the clasp with his numb fingers. Once he grasped the clasp, he gently pulled it down my back, letting it fall off my body and pool to my feet.

I felt his breath on my neck as I watched his eyes gaze at my undergarments he had purchased.  “You’re so beautiful,” he murmured into my neck, moving his hands down my sides, letting one hand snake to my stomach while the other smoothed down my back.

“Fuck, I wish I weren’t this drunk,” he mumbled, closing his eyes and leaning into me.  I let out a slight laugh, wishing neither of us were drunk. 

“Let’s go to bed,” I whispered, turning and wrapping my
arm around his waist, helping him walk to the bed.

He flopped down on his back, clothing still on.  He was much more intoxicated
than I was, and I was impressed his eyes still stayed open when his body crashed.  I reached around to unclasp the corset and tossed it to the ground then rummaged for one of Tyler’s t-shirts.

I climbed on the bed, trying to pull the covers from underneath Tyler and over us.  Luckily Tyler could still manage to move.  Once the covers were over us, I curled up next to him.  I felt a little more at ease after our confessions tonight, and even though the night didn’t go as planned, we dug deeper into our relationship.  I felt stronger and more connected.  We were becoming something so intense and real, and it was the most invigorating feeling I had ever felt.

Chapter 22

A low, strained groan escaped Tyler’s throat as the sun peeked through the window.  I slowly sat up, rubbing my eyes.  I glanced at the clock, noticed it was only 7:00am and flopped back down on the bed.  I should have gotten up for some Tylenol, but the down comforter was way too enticing.

Tyler groaned again
then sat up and stretched his arms.  He slowly stood and made his way to the bathroom.  I heard him rummaging through a bag, and then he came to my side of the bed, placing two Tylenol pills and a glass of water on the end table.  Before I could say anything, he was back in the bathroom then walked out the door.  He had changed into gym shorts and a t-shirt.  Where was he going?  I pouted.  I wanted to snuggle in bed with him.  He didn’t need to be on the golf course for another three hours.  I know I had kind of lost it in front of him last night, and he had said some horrible things, but we worked it out, and we were drunk.  I wasn’t going to hold it against him, even if some of it was true.  He immediately took everything back anyway, and if I were sober I wouldn’t have cried like a toddler who had her candy taken from her.

I attempted to go back to sleep but failed, so I decided to shower and get breakfast, knowing once those small tasks were done my body would demand more sleep.

As
I was getting out of the shower, Tyler was back in the bathroom, sweaty and salty.  His shirt was off as he brushed his teeth at the sink.  He must have gone for a run.   My stomach churned; running with a hangover sounded awful.

I wrapped the towel around my body and walked up behind hi
m.  He continued with his task but refused to meet my eyes.

“Thank you for the
Tylenol,” I murmured, picking up my toothbrush.  Tyler nodded then reached to turn the shower back on.

“Why don’t you order breakfast?”
he said briskly as he stripped from his shorts and boxers then continued into the shower.

I frowned.  Why was he being so short?  Maybe he just wanted to be clean?  Part of me wanted to
drop my towel and re-shower so I could join him, but then the other part said he needed some space.  Maybe he was embarrassed from last night?  I had never seen him so drunk before, but he didn’t do anything too crazy, besides calling me out on being a skank.

I brushed my teeth and threw on
my bathing suit and a cover up then proceeded out to the kitchen to find the breakfast menu.

I ordered a few dishes, figuring Jamie and Nathan would emerge from her bedroom shortly.
  Only Jamie.  You would think she would have learned by now to not sleep with her bosses.  But they did seem to have a connection.  I just wasn’t sure if a romance was the vibe I was getting.

Tyler joined me at the dining table as room service was leaving.