Crystal (18 page)

‘And shouldn’t you be at home with your daughter or have you found some other druggie to look after her and get you up the duff?’ Faith joined in.

That did it; no way was Crystal going to stand there and listen to her friend being insulted. She pulled out her phone and dialled up Bill, their driver, who often doubled as their
security guy. She didn’t say anything – they’d used this routine several times before, usually with fans who wouldn’t leave them alone.

‘I’ll be right down, Crystal,’ Bill said.

Crystal snapped her phone shut. Faith laughed. ‘Not there, Crystal? You’ll just have to stay around a bit longer, we’re not finished with you yet.’

Crystal turned to Tahlia and rolled her eyes, ‘Whatever.’ There were plenty of things she could have said to the girls, but no way was she going to sink to their level. She reckoned it would be two minutes before Bill pitched in. Faith then started on Crystal.

‘And what’s your problem anyway, Crystal Meth? Not got anyone to shag you yet?’

Crystal pretended to yawn and then, as Faith was about to launch into another tirade, Bill arrived on the scene – all six foot four of him and two hundred pounds of muscle. Bill was an ex-squaddie who looked as rough as boots but who was actually lovely, and bred Persian cats in his spare time.

‘We’re ready to go now, Bill,’ Crystal said to him, as he stood towering over Kimmi.

‘Well, we haven’t finished,’ screeched Kimmi, trying to stop him moving her. But Bill picked her up as easily as if she was a child and lifted her on to one of the tables nearby. She shouted at the other girls to stop him, but they all backed away nervously. Crystal and Tahlia then sauntered past them. Crystal couldn’t resist a parting shot; ‘I hear
Love Island
are looking for contestants; you should give them a call, you’d be perfect.’ Then she and Tahlia walked out of the club without so much as a backward glance.

‘Cheers, Bill,’ Tahlia said as Bill drove them away from the club.

‘That’s what I’m here for,’ he replied. ‘To serve and protect my angels.’

‘Belle was right about that lot,’ Crystal said. ‘They give trash a bad name.’

It was after one by the time she got home. Crystal had a taste for the minimalist when it came to interior design. Her two-bedroom flat was painted white throughout, with stripped wooden floors. She had grown up in a cluttered, claustrophobic flat in Camden, north London, which had never felt warm or inviting and now she loved having the feeling of space. Her living room had high ceilings, an original marble Victorian fireplace, and the only furniture she’d added was two white sofas, an elegant glass coffee table, and a red velvet chair. On the walls hung a giant Andy Warhol screen print of Marilyn Monroe and a black and white photo Crystal had enlarged of her and her brother together, when she was eight and he was six, on one of the few holidays they had ever been taken on. The pair of them were grinning away on Camber Sands in their swimming costumes and sun hats, each clutching an ice cream. Crystal looked at the picture now, trying to imagine what it had felt like to be so blissfully happy. It was after that holiday that their dad had stopped having them to stay at the weekend and saw them less and less frequently, by the time she was ten he had moved away and lost contact with them completely. For years, Crystal hated Saturday mornings, hated knowing that her dad was never going to come and pick her and Luke up.

She was jolted from her thoughts by her mobile. Her heart raced as she fumbled in her bag to locate it. Unknown number flashed on the screen. She flipped her phone open to answer it. It was Jake.

‘Have I blown it?’ he asked

‘No,’ she answered, ‘I just wondered why you hadn’t called.’

‘There were so many times when I was going to. I thought about you all day.’ He paused then went on, ‘I’m just scared of getting involved with someone else, it’s so soon after Eve.’ He sounded slightly drunk. ‘But the thing is, I do want to get involved with
you
.’

Crystal hesitated; she could be cool, or she could say how she really felt. She went for honesty. ‘And I want to get involved with you,’ she answered softly.

‘So would dinner tomorrow make up for me being so crap today?’

‘I should play hard to get and say no, shouldn’t I?’ Crystal replied.

‘No, Crystal. No games, that’s the deal with me, we have to be honest.’ He sounded serious.

‘All right, no games,’ she answered, equally serious. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow night.’

‘
SO YOU LIKE
him then, Chrissy?’ Her brother Luke asked, as the two of them caught up over lunch in one of the many cafés in Brighton’s Lanes. He was the only person she would allow to call her that. Crystal had planned the trip to see her brother several weeks ago – they didn’t get to meet up as often as she would have liked because of her work and because Luke’s business was taking off. He’d been running his own garden design company for a year and was doing well, but competition was tough and as a result he rarely had a day off. So Crystal really didn’t think she could cancel even though she wanted to prepare for her first date with Jake that night.

Crystal nodded and smiled. ‘I really do.’

Luke raised his coffee cup and declared, ‘Here’s to him then. I just hope he’s good enough for my big sis.’

Crystal looked at her brother. She felt such a fierce, protective love for him. As far as she was concerned he was all the family she had in the world and he meant everything to her. She’d barely spoken to her mum in months. And neither of them had heard from their dad in years. When her mother had left for Spain it had been a huge responsibility for Crystal; Luke was only thirteen. Throughout his teenage years Crystal had worried about him – worried he would be bullied because they didn’t have much money and he couldn’t afford the PlayStations, Xboxes, computer games and expensive trainers that his friends could, worried too
that he would fall in with the wrong crowd. But Luke had stayed the sweet, open person that he’d always been. When he was sixteen he told Crystal that he wanted to be a garden designer and that’s exactly what he’d trained to do. She was very proud of him.

After lunch Luke wanted to show her the garden he was working on. She was bowled over by what he’d done. He’d created such a beautiful space. ‘You’re so talented!’ she exclaimed. ‘I don’t know what any of these plants are but they look fantastic.’

‘Perhaps one day I’ll design a garden for you and Jake,’ Luke answered, clearly pleased by her reaction.

‘For me definitely,’ Crystal replied. The mention of Jake’s name made her check her watch. It was four o’clock. ‘I’d better start heading back now,’ she added, feeling her heart racing faster at the prospect of seeing Jake.

‘Sure, you need to get ready for your big date,’ Luke teased her.

As he drove her to the station Crystal mentally ticked off all the things she needed to do – shower, shave legs, put on nail varnish, and then decide what to wear. Jake had texted her to say that he’d booked a table at Le Caprice in Mayfair for eight o’clock so she wanted to wear something smart.

She caught the 4.49 with seconds to spare, then sat back in her seat; she should be back in London with plenty of time to get ready. Two hours later she was not feeling so good. The train had been stuck outside Haywards Heath. And to make matters worse, she couldn’t text Jake to tell him because she had no signal and nor did any one else in her carriage.

She finally arrived back home at eight o’clock, almost crying with frustration. She’d texted and called Jake once she had a signal to tell him she was going to be late but he hadn’t replied. She could only hope that he’d got the message. Realising she had no time for a shower, she simply cleaned her teeth, sprayed on some perfume and changed her T-shirt for a long black vest which she wore with a thick black belt. She kicked off her pumps, swapping them for her favourite
Christian Louboutin slingbacks, keeping her jeans on. She had to put her make-up on in the taxi. She arrived at the restaurant forty minutes late. It was not the entrance she had planned.

‘I’m so sorry I’m late,’ she exclaimed when the waiter showed her to the table.

Jake managed a small smile, but she could tell he was pissed off.

He softened slightly when she gave her explanation about the train, but there was a distance between them that hadn’t been there the last time they had been together.

‘Didn’t you get my messages?’ Crystal asked.

He shook his head. ‘I left my phone at a friend’s; I’m crap with mobiles.’

They hardly spoke after the waiter had taken their order. This was not what Crystal had imagined happening, not after their kiss. What was going on?

She looked at Jake. God, he was so handsome, but he seemed so distant, so reserved.

She had another sip of wine, longing for a cigarette, even though she knew he didn’t approve.

Their hors d’oeuvres arrived but Crystal’s appetite had left her. She didn’t want to be sitting in the restaurant with someone who didn’t want to be with her. She rearranged the food around her plate and drank more wine.

Finally, Jake spoke. ‘I’m sorry, Crystal, I’m behaving like such a shit; it’s just that when you weren’t here I thought you were standing me up.’

‘Why would I do that?’ Crystal demanded, stunned that he would think such a thing.

‘I’m sure you wouldn’t but my ex-girlfriend . . .’ he paused, obviously struggling with his feelings, ‘did it several times towards the end of our relationship when she’d forgotten that she had arranged to meet me and she was busy shagging her other man. And it’s just left me with this feeling that I can’t trust anyone.’ He ran his fingers through his short blond hair. ‘God, I hate being like this! All day I’ve wanted to
see you and now I seem to be doing everything to push you away. I don’t blame you if you want to go.’

‘And all I was worried about was that I hadn’t had time for a shower! I had no idea I would be having dinner with someone who had so much baggage.’ Crystal tried to make light of the situation while she tried to understand what had been going through Jake’s head.

Jake made a conscious effort to shake off his mood. ‘You didn’t have a shower!’ he said in mock horror, then took her hand and gently kissed the inside of her wrist, saying, ‘You smell delicious’, sending a shiver of desire through Crystal. She had made a list of reasons in her mind why there was no way she would sleep with him tonight: 1) because she hadn’t known him long enough, 2) because she hadn’t showered, 3) because she hadn’t shaved her legs. But the touch of his lips against her skin and the way he was looking at her made her want to revise that decision.

The rest of the evening was very nearly a perfect first date. Jake stopped being abrupt, he opened up and they slipped back easily into flirtatious talk. As they left the restaurant Crystal had almost decided to go home with him. And when Jake pulled her into a doorway and started kissing her in the passionate way he had before, Crystal definitely wanted to take things further. But she was in for a surprise when, after a kiss which seemed to be leading to more, Jake hailed a taxi and, instead of following her in, remained on the pavement and said, ‘I’d better get my mobile. I’ll call you tomorrow.’

Crystal sat back in the taxi in a state of disbelief and frustration. She wanted him and she knew he wanted her, so what was the big deal? Back home she finally showered but was feeling too wound up to go to bed. There was no point in phoning any of her friends as it was too late; besides, Tahlia wouldn’t get it, she’d just think he was respecting her by not sleeping with her on the first date. In spite of Jake saying he didn’t like game playing, it seemed to Crystal as if that’s exactly what he was doing.

Their next three dates followed the same pattern – every
one ending in passionate kissing that had Crystal longing to rip his clothes off and get him into bed. Jake was a gorgeous kisser and in Crystal’s experience that meant he was bound to be a great lover. But each time Jake pulled away and said goodnight. When she finally told Tahlia, her friend laughed at her and told her to enjoy it and that it was good to take things slowly. Jez was a little more on her wavelength but also told her the best things were worth waiting for. ‘Yeah, right,’ she told him. ‘That means a big fat nothing coming from you seeing as your middle name is instant gratification. How long after meeting Rufus was it before you had sex?’

‘Half an hour,’ Jez admitted. ‘But you hetrosexualists are different.’

By the Saturday she was about to explode with frustration. They’d been to see a film together and everything had been perfect until the end of the night, when Jake yet again hailed her a taxi. She could barely bring herself to say goodnight to him as he shut the door. What was wrong with her? Why didn’t he want to take things further? Didn’t he fancy her? Back home she threw herself on her sofa and considered whether to get out her Rabbit
.
But that was the trouble with vibrators; they were great for when you just wanted a quick fix, not so great when you burned with desire for someone in particular . . .

She lit a cigarette instead and switched on the TV.
Big Brother
was on.
Oh well
, she thought,
I may as well watch some people who are getting even less sex than me.
She was just getting into the housemates’ bitch fest – the ‘he-said-she-said-no-I-fucking-didn’t!’ routine – when her doorbell rang. Thinking it was probably someone wanting her neighbour, she ignored it. But it went again.

She marched to her front door, intending to give the insistent caller a piece of her mind but she saw Jake on the video screen. She picked up the receiver, and buzzed him in. She opened her front door; arms folded trying to look cool, while inside she was anything but.

‘I know it’s late, but I had to see you,’ Jake said.

Crystal shrugged. ‘I wasn’t asleep, come in.’

As soon as she shut the door his mouth found hers and his hands caressed her body, undoing the buttons on her black silk dress. They fell on to one of the huge white sofas in a tangle of limbs. Crystal didn’t care that he might think she was easy or a slag; she just wanted him and it felt so right. She pulled off his T-shirt, caressed his flat, hard stomach. He slipped off her dress and began kissing her breasts, sucking her nipples in the most tantalising way that had Crystal almost writhing with desire and wishing he would explore more of her body.