Daisy's Secret (49 page)

Around midnight, Clem returned exhausted and hollow-eyed, sent back by the rescue service to get some rest while they took over. He looked at his wife’s stricken face, at the tears rolling down her cheeks and went and put his arms about her.

‘Nay Florrie love, don’t take on so. It’s not your fault. None of it was your fault, not the loss of this little chap, any more than with our Emma. It were just one of those things.’

‘All these years I’ve kept telling meself that,’ Florrie said. ‘But I thought you blamed me.’

‘And I thought you blamed me.’

‘I did, at first. I couldn’t get it out of my head, couldn’t do anything but think of our Emma and long to turn back the clock, wishing I’d never gone to Salford that weekend. By the time I realised I’d lost you, I didn’t know how to get you back. Oh, I’ve been that lonely and miserable.’

‘Nay, I’m not lost, thee’s still got me. Always will have, so far as I’m concerned. And they’ll find this little un. He’s not lost to us yet, not by a long chalk.’ Clem sat down beside her on the settle and took a firm grasp of her hand.

Having listened to all of this, Rita turned to Daisy and said, ‘And I suppose you blame me for all of this mess?’

Daisy smothered a sigh. ‘I don’t blame you for anything, Mother.’

‘Aye, you do. You blamed me for taking the babby away from you in the first place, an act of mercy for your own good. And now you blame me for losing him again, because I fetched poor sick Percy back into your life when you wanted to run off and wed meladdo.’

‘This isn’t the time for an inquisition. Leave it, Mother. I’ve had enough of your manoeuvring and manipulation.’ Daisy didn’t know how it was she could sit here, so outwardly calm, when inside she was falling apart, the pain in her heart tearing her to pieces.

‘There you are then, didn’t I say that you blamed me?’ Rita looked from one to the other of Florrie and Clem as if for support. Neither paid her the slightest attention, having eyes only for each other as they chatted away, twenty to the dozen, at last catching up on years of brooding silence.

Daisy too was still talking, taking this moment’s lull to get a few things off her chest. ‘I’ll make my own decisions in future, ta very much, without any help or interference from you. Whatever I decide to do, it’s
my
choice,
my
life. And once this war is over, you’ll pack your bags and go on your way. So bear in mind that your stay here is temporary. There’d be blue murder done if we had to suffer each other’s company for too long.’

‘Hear, hear,’ Rita said with feeling. ‘Catch me stopping on anyroad. I see what our Florrie means. I reckon nowt to this wild, open country. I were thinking of going and staying with cousin Billy. He’s got a place out at Irlam, and he could probably do with the company, and somebody to look after him.’

Poor cousin Billy, Daisy thought. ‘Well, there’s no hurry. So long as we understand each other.’

‘Oh, we do, madam. We understand each other very well.’ As always, Rita must have the last word.

A pale dawn was creeping into the sky before they heard the welcome sound of a police van in the yard. Daisy was the first to rush out the door, Clem and the two women close behind. Megan and Trish were curled up together on the rug fast asleep, and slept through it all.

‘Your runaways didn’t get far,’ said the police constable. Sat the night out in a shepherd’s bothy. Bit cold, but the baby has been checked over by a doctor and passed fit and well.’

Daisy gathered little Robbie into her arms, breathing in the sweet scent of him as she held him against her heart. ‘Oh thank you, officer, thank you so much. I can’t tell you how grateful I am.’ The tears were coming now, fast and furious as they rained down her cheek and she slapped them away with a hiccupping laugh. ‘What about Percy? He won’t be charged, will he?’

‘The young man is a different kettle of fish. Seems he had it in mind to top himself.’

‘What?’

The constable looked sorrowful and dropped his voice to a whisper so that the child didn’t hear, for all he couldn’t possibly understand. ‘We found a rope, d’you see, hanging from the rafters of the bothy. But because of the night being so cold, we think he was too worried about the child getting hypothermia to get round to doing anything. We found the pair cuddled up together, safe and well. How long they’d’ve lasted like that if we hadn’t found them so soon, I couldn’t rightly say. But no, there’ll be no charges. It’s been put down to battle fatigue. Pretty common problem these days, I’m afraid.’ And then in his normal, official sounding voice. ‘The hospital is keeping him in for a few days observation. They need to know he’s in no danger, to himself or to others.’

‘I see.’ Daisy was trembling, could hardly take in what she was hearing. Had she driven Percy to this? Was it because she had rejected him that he’d stolen Robbie and run off, threatening to take his own life?

Percy came home a week later, with not quite such a clean bill of health but, as the doctor carefully explained to Daisy, ‘What he needs most of all, lass, is some tender loving care from a good woman such as yourself. Your husband will settle in time, though I can’t promise he’ll be as he was before. Few are, who’ve lived through this war and suffered what he’s suffered. He needs to believe in life again and the possibility of a future, to know that he’s safe, and feel secure. He’ll heal eventually, with love and care. Just give him time.’

She began to explain that she wasn’t Percy’s wife, that she wasn’t the one to give him tender loving care, but one glance at the sheepish guilt in Percy’s anguished face, the needy appeal in his eyes, stopped her in her tracks. Someone had to be responsible for him, and who else did he have? Where else could he go? And who else did
she
have, now that Harry had gone? Weren’t the pair of them both in the same boat?

But she had her son, safe and warm in her arms.

That night, Daisy sat in her room and wrote her last letter to Harry. She’d moved the baby’s cot beside her own bed, knowing she could never risk losing him again, nor taking her eye off him for a moment. Harry had made his decision and she had made hers. In the letter, she told how she bore him no ill will, how she would always love him.

‘
You will ever be the love of my life, Harry, but I can see that I’ve hurt you and spoiled things between us. I never meant to, any more than I set out to lie to you. I just kept putting it off till it was suddenly too late. I shall do my duty and probably marry Percy. He desperately needs my help. I hope you can find another girl one day to make you happy, so you can start again. I shall love you always. Yours ever, Daisy.
’ Her face was wet with tears, her vision blinded long before she’d finished it.

Harry’s reply was swift in coming, and heartbreaking in its brevity. ‘
I can’t believe that you lied to me. How could you do this to me, Daisy, after all we’ve meant to each other? I think I might die.’

Daisy believed she might die too, or go mad at least. She kept reading his words over and over till her head spun. The letter upset her so much she screwed it up and threw it in the waste paper basket, then put a match to it to burn it before suddenly realising what she was doing: destroying Harry’s last words of love to her. Frantic now, she doused the flame which had only caught at one corner although the paper had gone brown and scorched all over. Daisy smoothed it gently out and put it carefully away in a drawer with the rest. It was over between them. They had both made their choices. Harry was too hurt to forgive her. If marrying Percy and giving him the care he needed won her peace of mind as well as the return of her son, then she must somehow learn to be content with that. Perhaps she’d been expecting too much to ask for love as well. She prayed that one day Harry would forgive her and be happy again. She could only hope so.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

‘Didn’t I say you were mad? Completely off your head. It would seem I’ve been proved right. Not only are you quite incapable of running your own life sensibly, you can’t even be responsible for a child.’

Laura looked wearily up at Felix and wanted to protest that Chrissy wasn’t a child but a stubborn, rebellious teenager who anyone would find difficult to deal with, except that she hurt too much to risk moving her head even an inch, let alone attempt to speak. Someone was beating an iron bar against her skull, and lying prone in a hospital bed swathed in heaven alone knew how many bandages wasn’t the ideal place to start an argument. Her eyes swivelled to the door, willing it to open and admit David. What she wouldn’t give right now to see his smiling face, and for his solid support. No doubt he was still shearing sheep and blissfully unaware of the fracas she’d caused.

‘This settles the matter once and for all. You’re not staying here a moment longer. This is an unsafe place both for Chrissy, and for you. The doctor says you’ve got off lightly. No broken bones, though with enough bruising to make you look as if you’d gone three rounds with Mike Tyson. You’re coming home with me and don’t try to argue. I won’t take no for an answer.’

‘No!’ Until the word popped out, Laura wasn’t certain she’d ever speak again. Her throat felt dry and sore, and the pounding in her head was making her feel all hot and funny again. ‘Water.’

Felix thrust the glass into her face, then when it dawned on him that she wasn’t able to move quite yet, lifted her head and reluctantly helped her to take a sip. Laura closed her eyes in blissful gratitude.

‘I intend to tell your clients to pack their bags and leave. I’m going to close the house this very day.’

‘You - are - not!’ Three words. She was improving.

‘Enough, Laura. No more of this wilfulness. My patience has quite run out. It’s a wonder Chrissy wasn’t raped or murdered. What were you thinking of to let her go out with that maniac, and so late?’

‘I didn’t . . .’

‘Don’t deny it. Why else would she be there with him in the middle of nowhere in the dark? I simply can’t believe even you would be so stupid as to allow that.’ He was striding back and forth in the hospital room, a private one Laura noticed, wondering who would pay for it if Felix truly was on the verge of bankruptcy. She sincerely hoped it wasn’t going to be her. His fury was such that his face very nearly matched the colour of Chrissy’s hair.

‘How - is - Chrissy. Is she OK?’

‘Fine. No thanks to you. Dear God, Laura, what were you thinking of? You really are the most obstinate woman I ever met. Was this your idea of revenge for that little fling I had with Miranda, allowing my daughter to be ravished by a lout?’

‘That’s a despicable thing to say. And she wasn’t being ravished.’ The rekindling of the anger she always felt when Felix started ranting at her was bringing strength soaring back into her veins like new blood.

‘Doing drugs then.’

‘They were talking, and kissing. Nothing worse than that, so far as I know.’

‘How would you know anything, you stupid woman?’

‘I’ve done my utmost to be the parent you’ve failed to be. You and Julia. Someone has to give Chrissy the time and attention she needs, and neither of you ever have any to spare for anyone but yourselves.’

‘Don’t start on the injured wife routine again, please.’ He rolled his eyes in a fair imitation of Chrissy when she was playing her exasperated with adults routine.

Laura drew in a deep, calming breath. ‘If you dislike me so much, why do you want me back? Why not settle for the miraculous Miranda? Or has she too grown tired of your foul moods, or of endlessly cooking wonderful dinners for you. If so, then find somebody else to take her place. Why does it have to be
me
?’

‘Because you are my
wife
!’ he roared, inches from her face.

‘And you still love me? I don’t think so. Could it possibly be because I’m the one with property to sell by any chance? I can’t think of any other reason why you would want this mockery of a marriage to continue.’ Oh, she was firing on all cylinders now. ‘We’re getting a divorce, remember?’

‘Dammit, I’ll decide if and when we divorce, not
you
.’

‘Which will be after my house has been sold, presumably, and you’ve robbed me of my inheritance. Sorry, Felix, but I wasn’t born yesterday. Well, aren’t I right? Isn’t that the truth of the matter?’

‘Yes, if you want to know the truth,’ he roared. ‘I believe I have a right to a share in anything and everything you own, as your husband. I’ve been offered a golden opportunity to buy into a business, one of the best art dealers in the county. They’ve offered me a partnership but I need to invest some capital.’

‘So that’s why you’re so desperate for me to sell Lane End. Nothing to do with debts after all, only a desire for a bigger slice of the pie.’

‘It’s a very juicy pie, and you’re just being difficult, and uncooperative, as usual. I intend to take this partnership, Laura, with or without you.’

‘Oh, well if I have a choice, which I most certainly do then I’d prefer you did it without me, thanks all the same. This isn’t the nineteenth century and I’m a free woman, or at least intend to be pretty soon. I’m sorry about Chrissy. All I can say is that looking after a teenager isn’t easy for anyone, let alone a stepparent, and I did my best. It wasn’t good enough, I can see that and I’m too fond of her not to feel some guilt on the issue. But you and I are a different matter entirely. It’s time we went our separate ways. I want a divorce and intend to get one while I’m still young enough to start again, whether or not you agree. I believe I have sufficient grounds.’