Dare to Desire (14 page)

“How did you get so smart?” He toyed with her hair, combing through the strands and twirling it with his finger.

She let out a sigh. “A lot of practice trying not to focus on bad things, I guess,” she said, surprised she was answering so honestly.

“I want to know more about those bad things. More about you. The things you don’t talk about,” he said in a low, soothing voice.

She knew what he wanted. It was a story she rarely told. Someone had to earn her trust and her heart before she’d even consider admitting that neither of her parents had wanted her. Saying it out loud made her vulnerable, and Madison normally didn’t allow many people that close. She’d kept Alex at a distance the first time they were together, even as she’d known how hard she was falling in such a short time. Because she knew he wasn’t a forever kind of guy, and the truth went to the deepest hurt she nursed in her heart.

But she could no longer hold back from this man. She didn’t want to. He’d been asking for her trust, and if she was going to try, as he seemed to be doing, she had to let him in.

She sighed and said, “My mom left me and my dad. She said she was going to work one morning, and she never came back. When he realized something was wrong, he called her job, her friends, but no one had heard from her.” She shrugged. “We didn’t have any other family that I knew of, so it was just me and him.”

He began to stroke her hair, long, soothing touches this time, keeping them connected as she spoke.

“How old were you?”

“I was twelve, and it was horrible. My father worked really long hours in construction and came home really late. Looking back, I know he went out drinking before coming home. I would let myself into the house after school, make myself dinner with whatever I could find in the fridge or the pantry, do my homework and … cry myself to sleep.”

“Fuck,” Alex muttered.

She was glad he couldn’t see her face and appreciated the strength of his arms wrapped tightly around her. “One day he said we were going clothes shopping. I was really excited because, one, we never ever bought new things, and two, my clothes were getting tighter. I’d started developing and … you know.”

She pulled in a deep breath, the lump in her throat so big it actually hurt. “You’d think this would get easier.” She buried her face against his side.

“Take your time, Angel.” His voice was warm and soothing, but she felt the tension emanating from him.

It wasn’t an easy story to tell. It couldn’t be an easy one to hear. Riley had cried when Madison had told her, and Madison had only given the other woman the bare bones.

My father dumped me at the mall, never to be seen again
. The cold, clinical version. And even then, Madison hadn’t wanted to face her friend after the revelation, but Riley had already inserted herself in Madison’s life and wasn’t going anywhere. She, more than anyone, had taught Madison what a true friend really was.

She lifted her head and drew a deep breath. “So we went to the mall. My father bought me a soda, and we wandered around the stores for a little while, and then he asked me if I needed to use the bathroom.” Her body shook despite Alex’s secure hold, the day coming back to her in vivid detail. “I went to the ladies’ room, came out…” She couldn’t say the words. To her mortification, a sob came out instead.

“That bastard,” Alex said, his voice tight, anger evident beneath the surface.

He embraced her with his entire being, holding her close, but fury vibrated in his big, muscled body. Anger for her. She knew it without him having to explain, and the thought that he cared for her enough to feel that kind of emotion undid her completely. The protective walls that had always kept her apart and distant crumbled around her, and she
felt
things. Things she never wanted to experience again.

“No more,” he said into her hair. “Don’t relive it for me.”

She normally didn’t relive it at all. Didn’t allow herself to remember the intense and all-encompassing pain and loss of that day and every one that followed. But now the dam had broken, and the memories flooded back, along with big, heaving sobs.

She’d walked out of the mall bathroom, looked around, and her dad had been nowhere to be found. She hadn’t panicked. Not at first. She’d checked all the stores they’d been in. The men’s stores. The food court. Finally she’d returned to the bathroom thinking maybe he’d gone back to find her. Some good Samaritan must have noticed the little girl sitting on the floor outside the restroom crying and called mall security. The rest was a blur, along with the ensuing years of her life spent in foster homes.

Alex didn’t know how long she sobbed. From the way she cried, he figured it had been forever since she’d let her emotions free, and she exhausted herself in the process. The heavy sobs quieted first. Long after she grew silent, Alex held Madison in his arms, his heart beating hard in his chest. He’d wanted her to trust him, not unleash this kind of grief. Nausea filled him, along with pain that reached to the depths of his soul.

He stroked her hair, aware of the smallest hiccup or sound she made. Soon her breathing evened out, and he hoped to God she’d fallen asleep. A dreamless, memory-free sleep. She deserved as much.

But he couldn’t stop his mind from spinning with the story she’d told, the things she’d said, and those she’d left out. Knowing about her past and hearing it from her lips were two very different things. More than anything, he wanted to hunt both her parents down and kill them with his bare hands. But he understood his rage wouldn’t do Madison any good, and he’d have to get himself under control before she awoke.

When a knock sounded at the door, he slipped out from beside her and accepted her luggage, tipping the man quietly. Then Alex climbed back into bed and eased his arm around her once more.

In the peaceful silence, he couldn’t help but look at his own life with more appreciation than he ever had before. His family was dysfunctional, but they were his. They were there. Day in and day out, he’d had people who loved him and who he could rely on. He had food to eat, a roof over his head, and though his father was a bastard of the first order, he’d always made sure he and his siblings never wanted for anything. Even Ian and his brothers and sisters hadn’t been neglected.

Every child had a right to security and love, but the woman in his arms had had none of those things. She wouldn’t want his pity, and in truth, he couldn’t give it to her. Not when he admired her so damned much. She’d overcome her past and become a strong, independent woman. One he wanted to take care of and give everything she’d missed out on for all these years, especially the family she’d been denied.

Today had been an eye-opener on many levels, from the courageous teenager he’d met to the brave female he loved—

His thoughts screeched to a halt at the word that had just run through his brain. Yet he couldn’t deny it. For six months, he hadn’t looked at another woman. In the last few weeks, he’d done all he could to show her he’d changed. Now he wanted to give her the security she’d never had and possess her completely. If that wasn’t love, he didn’t know what was.

*     *     *

Madison felt awkward after her emotional breakdown, but to Alex’s credit, he didn’t treat her any differently. She woke up to find the bellman had delivered her suitcase. Other than asking if she was okay, Alex had merely kissed her senseless and left her to get ready for dinner and clubbing afterwards. For her part, she was determined to put the episode behind her and move forward like she always did.

After dinner, they headed over to Elite, Alex’s cousin’s club. Olivia and Dylan headed for the bar while Alex looked for his cousin. They paused by the dance floor.

The club was elegant, glamorous, luxurious, and any other name Madison could think of for a New York City hot spot. Black ceiling, gold inlay etchings in the walls, leather banquettes, and open-air decks overlooking the main dance floor.

“According to the write-ups, when this place first opened, it cost three million.” Alex shook his head. “Thousand-dollar cover charges if the papers can be believed. Gabe doesn’t talk.”

Madison blinked in shock. “Just … wow. But it is gorgeous.”

“My cousin has good taste. So does his sister Lucy. She helped design the place.”

Madison grinned and met his gaze. His dark eyes devoured her, and she did the same right back. He looked incredibly handsome in black pants and a white shirt, rolled at the sleeves. The unbuttoned shirt revealed tanned skin and gave her an enticing peek at his sprinkling of chest hair.

He looked over her shoulder, and a wide smile took hold. “There’s Gabe.” Alex led her to the private, roped-off area, his hand hot and branding on the small of her back, open thanks to a deep plunge in the material of her dress.

The private area was raised higher than the dance floor and bar, and Alex whistled over the music.

To her surprise, Gabe heard. He rose, disentangling himself from women who hung all over him, though she had to admit he looked bored with them all.

“Cousin!” Alex said as Gabe strode down a few steps and joined them. “Look at you up high so you can survey your kingdom.”

Gabe’s lips twitched but didn’t lift in a full-blown grin. In this, Madison could see distinct differences between Alex and Gabe. Gabe was more like Ian, more serious and always in control.

“It’s about time you showed your face in New York.” Gabe slapped Alex on the back. “Good to see you.”

“Same. And thanks for coming to all those games. It was always good to have family there.” Once learning about his other cousins, Gabe and his siblings welcomed them with open arms.

“My pleasure.” He shifted his steely gaze to Madison. “Who is this?”

Approval laced his tone.

“Madison Evans.” Alex snaked an arm around her waist in an unnecessarily proprietary gesture she actually liked. “Madison, this is my cousin Gabe.”

She smiled at the man. “Nice to meet you, Gabe. Actually, I see a little family resemblance.” She extended her hand, and Alex eased it down before tucking her even closer to his side.

Gabe chuckled. “So that’s how it is.”

“How what is?” Madison asked.

“I’ve seen you with women. This one’s off-limits.”

Before he could reply, Olivia walked over and threw her arms around him. “Hi there, cousin.”

Madison realized that since Olivia and Alex shared a father, Gabe was the cousin of both of them.

“Hi, beautiful.” Gabe hugged her tightly, light in his eyes as he looked her over. “Long time no see.”

“Too long. It’s a good thing business brought us to New York. Nice place you’ve got here.” She gestured her hand wide, taking in the expanse of the club.

Pride glinted in his eyes. “I like it. You’re all comped for the night, so enjoy. I’ll come over to check on you later.” With a nod of his head, he turned and walked away.

Madison blinked. “He’s … interesting. Very Ian-like.”

Olivia, Ian’s sibling, burst out laughing. “Well said! I knew I liked you.” She hooked her arm into Madison’s free one and pulled her away from Alex.

“Where are you taking her?” he asked, a scowl on his handsome face.

“For drinks and girl time. We’ll see you gentlemen in a little while.”

EIGHT

M
adison found herself sitting at a small private table with Olivia, shots of tequila in front of her. Olivia worked as assistant travel secretary to the team. She also sat in on high-level meetings with Ian because he valued her advice and was training her in all aspects of team business. Madison didn’t know her well, but Riley spoke highly of her, which vetted her enough for Madison. If she was going to drink with her and ultimately let down her guard, she needed that kind of assurance.

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Madison asked, gesturing between them.

“I wanted to get to know you better,” Olivia said.

“And take a breather from Dylan?”

Olivia laughed. “And now I know why Riley likes you.” She raised her tequila glass. “Lick, salt, drink, and bite. Ready?”

“Oh good Lord, you’re really going for this.” Madison shrugged. One or two wouldn’t kill her.

Madison licked her hand, salted, drank the burning liquid, and immediately bit into the lime wedge to kill the taste.

“Men are such a pain in the ass,” Olivia said after pulling the lime from between her lips.

Madison’s eyes watered, and she drew a deep breath. “They can be, yes. They can also be…” She turned her head and found Alex, leaning against a gleaming silver railing, his gaze never leaving her. “Hot.” She turned back.

Olivia wrinkled her nose. “Exasperating. That’s the word you were supposed to use. But it looks like my half brother got under your skin.”

“The way Dylan’s gotten under yours?” Madison asked.

Olivia gestured to another shot, and Madison drank along with her. “Damn men who want too much.”

Madison shook her head and laughed, but the sound hurt. “That hasn’t been my experience.”

“I think it is now. Alex hasn’t taken his eyes off of you since I pulled you away.”

Her cheeks warmed, but Olivia was right. “Things are changing between us,” Madison said, suddenly light-headed from the effects of the liquor.