December Heat (12 page)

No
other woman had made him think these kinds of thoughts before. The sooner Christmas was over and he was on his way back to Europe, the safer he would feel. The idea of commitment scared him more than reporting the news from a war zone. He didn’t like to consider what kind of person that made him.

He
quit pacing the length of the verandah like a caged animal and entered the living room to find Nic tidying up, plumping and rearranging cushions.

“Hi,”
she said. “I wondered where you were.”

“Not
too far away.”

“Did
you enjoy yourself today, with the crowd here? I know you find it much quieter than what you’re used to.”

“Yes,
I did enjoy the company, and the little ones.” That had been the biggest shock of all, considering he’d had very little to do with children.

“Magenta
invited us to Christmas drinks.”

“Where
exactly does she live?”

She
stopped, placed her hands on her hips and surveyed her handiwork. A tightness coiled in Jake’s gut as he watched her. Somehow, Nic was drawing him in, weaving him into her domesticity.

“Just
down the road.”

“Down
the road?” Jake thought about how few and far the houses were scattered the further into the hills he’d driven. “How far down the road?”

“Not
far, about five minutes by car.”

“Do
you want to go?”

“Yes,
I’d like to. Very much.” She looked thoughtful. “You know Jake, today was a real milestone for me.”

“How
do you mean?”

“Since
Mark’s death, I’ve hardly been out of the house, at least not socially. I’ve kept to myself way too much. The only company I’ve had has been Danny’s occasional visit and Magenta when she’s dropped Kylie off. To be honest, I wondered how I’d manage to perform in front of an audience after being in isolation for so long. I thought it might be a real problem performing when I haven’t felt exactly like socializing these past months. I hoped everything would fall into place, and I think it just might be all right now.”

She
looked relaxed and happy as if her life was beginning to take on a new shape and direction.

“That’s
great, Nic. I’m glad things are working out.”

Should
he ask her now, about Mark? It seemed a pity to dredge up her sorrow and spoil the moment. Jake decided the matter could keep for the time being.

But
he had to know. “What did Danny mean...about Mark?”

Nic’s
expression closed. “I’ve no idea. What did he say?”

Jake
drew closer to her as she plumped one more cushion and placed it on the chair.

“The
other day when he was here he said some things about Mark. When I pressed him today, he said I’d have to ask you.”

She
turned around to look at him, a hint of wariness in her hazel eyes.

“Tell
me, Nic, what was the problem with Mark?”

“If
I tell you, Jake, you might not like what you hear.” Concern laced her features.

“I
need to know. It will help me move on too.” He denied the niggling truth that he didn’t like the thought Danny knew something about Mark that he didn’t.

She
studied him in silence for a few moments, her jaw quivered. Was she that afraid of his reaction to whatever it was she had to tell him?

“I
know things weren’t as good between you as you’d anticipated. What went wrong?”

He
took her by the shoulders and gently eased her to sit on the couch. “Tell me.” He let her go and sat beside her, facing her.

She
pressed her lips together tightly then took a deep breath, but Jake still sensed her tension.

She
reached out and held his hand, her warm fine fingers squeezing his. Strangely, it gave him strength.

“Mark
had a depressive illness. The depression had a good hold of him by the time he sought medical help and it just continued to drag him down. There were days he didn’t want to get out of bed, didn’t surface until mid-afternoon.”

She
exhaled a shuddering sigh. “The medication didn’t seem to be doing him much good. And he wasn’t good about taking it. Some days he seemed to be improving, cared about himself, enthusiastic for life again. That’s when he resumed working on his portfolio. But in the weeks before the accident he went downhill again and refused to do anything to help himself. I encouraged and supported him all I could, but without his cooperation, there was little I could do.”

She
squeezed his hand again. Another shuddery sigh escaped her.

“Several
times I threatened to leave him. Tried to shock him back into reality. I was desperate, didn’t know what else to do.”

Her
tormented gaze held his.

“I
don’t know whether I’m to blame or not.” She dragged her fingers through her hair.

“What
are you saying?”

“Jake...I...I
don’t have any proof, but I suspect Mark’s accident was by his own hand.”

“What
the hell?” Jake gripped her shoulders and felt her tremble at his touch. Anger quivered inside him but disappeared when moisture glistened in her eyes. Jake drew her to him, seeking comfort from her closeness and her warmth. He closed his eyes and allowed his own sadness and shock to overwhelm him.

* * *

She woke in a cold sweat. The dream. It was only a dream, yet it had seemed so real. Mark had come to her, told her he was at peace, that everything was all right, that she would be all right. She tried to relax into the mattress. Not since his death had she dreamed about Mark. No doubt her talk with Jake had prompted such a strange occurrence.

Jake’s
reaction to her news had been much as she’d expected and she’d been sorry she’d told him. Not because he’d made her feel bad that he’d suggested Mark’s death was her fault. Not that he’d agreed her guilt was justified over her threats to leave Mark or that it was her fault he was so unhappy. There’d been nothing like that from him. He’d been so cut up by the news, not only for himself, but for her too.

Shock
and hurt seemed to weigh his body down. On reflection, she knew she’d done the right thing. Jake had to know so he could put some closure on the death of his friend. He’d never have been able to do that if he’d left with his questions unanswered. But of course, now he had more, and she was unable to give him answers for all of them.

She
barely understood things herself and appreciated it would take Jake time to grasp the situation.

Funnily
enough, talking things over with him had left her feeling as if a weight had lifted from her own shoulders. Thinking of Mark now, she no longer felt the depth of that familiar sadness and knew she’d come closer to laying him to rest.

Chapter Ten

Since
when had he been so particular about what he chose to wear to a party?

This
was Nic’s first social outing since Mark’s death and Jake wanted it to be something special for her, as well as himself. A wonderful memory to take away with him in the New Year.

Deep
down, he was still shocked by Nic’s news and wasn’t sure if he was ready for a party. He didn’t think he would ever understand what drove Mark to the depths of depression, and the suspected end result. But Nic was dealing with it and he would have to as well. He marveled at her resilience and resolve.

Jake
tossed the casual but dressy jeans back on the bed. “It’s not like I have much to choose from,” he muttered as he scrutinized the other two pairs of trousers he’d brought with him. He settled for the cream chinos and soft maroon silk shirt and, once dressed, went in search of Nic.

He
passed by the open door of the bathroom. A movement caught his attention.

Nic.

She took his breath away as he watched her lean over the sink to apply her lipstick. A burning sensation centered at the junction of his thighs and began spiraling outwards in every direction. He tried to shake it off, the recollection of the first time he’d ever laid eyes on her flashed into his mind...the way she held her mouth, soft, open, inviting, as she applied lipstick. He fought down the instinct to stride in there and sweep her into his arms.

She
noticed him then, and turned to smile in his direction. Her expression, her smile, did nothing to quell the erotic images filling his mind. Did she remember that first time they’d seen each other? Was she thinking about that kiss?

“I’ll
be ready in a minute.” Nic’s smooth soft voice drifted through his thoughts.

Their
gazes held. The light in Nic’s eyes softened, but didn’t fade in its intensity.

“Sure,
take your time.” He was tempted to offer to help her shed the silken robe she wore, but decided against it. Nic would probably kill him at the suggestion.

“I’ll
wait for you in the lounge room.” With reluctance, he dragged himself away from the vision in the bathroom. Sure it wasn’t his imagination that some sensual, magic thread connected them at that moment, Jake harbored some anxiety about the night ahead. If Nic should make a move, how could he deny her? His body wouldn’t allow it. But the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her.

* * *

Humidity filled the still night air. Lightning flashed in the distance, along with the faint rumble of thunder.

“If
only it would rain,” Nic said as she walked into the lounge room where Jake waited for her. “It would cool things down a bit.”

He
looked up. “Well, look at you.”

The
expression on his face almost made her knees wobble. Tonight she felt totally vulnerable to Jake. To her this felt more like a date than accompanying a friend to Christmas drinks at the neighbors. She wondered if he felt it too.

“Do
I look all right?”

“You
look sensational.”

She
turned around in a tiny circle.

She
heard his quick intake of breath.

“You’re
not wearing that! Not outside this house!”

She
spun around. “Why ever not?”

“Because
it shows too much bare skin.”

The
devil made her say it. The words were out before she had a chance to think. “And what’s wrong with my body, bare or otherwise?”

“Not
a thing, Sweetheart, not a thing.”

A
muscle near the corner of his mouth tightened as it did when he had something on his mind. His emotional tug of war was visible on his face.

“Well?”
She couldn’t resist teasing him. “Mark allowed me to wear this only when I went out with him. He said I needed a bodyguard.”

“Honey,
the way you look in that dress, you should have a license to wear it. It’s lethal. Having that picture of you naked, tucked away in a box at the back of a cupboard is quite a different matter to the live model being on display for all to see...to touch.”

Feeling
too reckless to be deterred by the shivery tingle coursing through her body, she stepped forward and lifted her chin defiantly. “And who’s going to touch me?”

Jake
held her gaze, a challenge in his eyes. An invitation? Dare she take him up on it? She was very tempted and recognized that keeping her distance from him was no longer her top priority.

Nic’s
soft little laugh betrayed her nerves. Tonight she felt lethal and a little reckless.

The
sapphire blue dress was more off than on, she conceded, with shoe string ties holding it all together. The soft material dipped in the center and molded to her breasts, baring just the right amount of cleavage to be alluring. The fine straps over her shoulders linked with similar straps across her back, where the dress scooped invitingly below her waist. A tempting split slashed the right side from the mid calf length to thigh.

“You
look pretty good yourself,” she complimented him, trying hard to settle her inner excitement. “So much better than the day you came here.”

Smart
and casual, the maroon silk shirt and light cream-colored trousers looked very stylish, very sexy, and she fought not to run her fingers over the silk covering his broad chest.

Instead,
she reached up and touched his face. His warmth and nearness, the way he looked at her, the pine fragrance of his cologne, combined to form a powerful package that hit her like a fist to her middle.

“The
woman I live with takes good care of me.” His husky voice flitted through her, all the way to her toes. Her fingers curled against his cheek.

“Does
she now?” she said, smiling impishly at him. “Lucky you.”

His
long warm fingers, tanned a deeper shade than her own, fastened around her wrist. He eased her hand from his cheek and kissed her fingertips. “If we don’t leave right now, I might change my mind about going to this party,” he said in that soft sexy timbre that could melt ice with one husky syllable.

He
took her breath away with the seductive tone of his voice, the desire in his eyes. And the images conjured up by his suggestive words were almost too much to bear.

“Jake....”

“Shhh.” He put a finger to her lips. “Let’s go, shall we?”

She
nodded, still not sure exactly what she’d been going to say, knowing that if she’d opened her mouth nothing that made sense would spout from it.

Jake
drove. The trip was made in silence apart from the directions Nicolette gave him. The house was well off the road, nestled into the bush covering the hill that rose up from the river. Colored Christmas lights twinkled brightly from the eaves of the house, and a considerable sized pine tree in the front garden had also been strung with festive lights. Cars parked in an orderly fashion filled the grounds at the front of the house.

“This
looks like some turn-out,” Jake noted, assisting Nic from the car. “I thought you said it was just drinks.” He pressed the button on the keypad attached to the keying. The car automatically locked with a soft clunk as they walked away.

“Oh,
Magenta never does anything by halves.” Nic took a deep breath. She new exactly what Magenta had in store for the evening.

“Why
do I find that easy to believe?”

Nic
smiled. “Beats me.”

She
took a deep, calming breath.

“Are
you okay?” He took her hand.

His
was warm, reassuring, firm, without being too tight, hinting at his inner strength.

“Yes,
just a little nervous, that’s all. I’ll be fine once I get inside.” Well, that’s what she told him. Truth was, it was Jake who made her feel nervous. She was still shaken after their little exchange. And Magenta’s plans for the evening didn’t help. They would be a true test of Nic’s readiness to take on her new role as lead female performer in Danny’s show.

“I’m...I’m
just a bit nervous...the crowd, you know.”

“How
do you get on when you’re performing on stage?”

They
walked up the path which wound through the gardens and eventually led to the house.

“I
manage somehow. I just switch off and concentrate on what I’m supposed to be doing. That helps.”

“I
guess the same principles don’t really apply here.”

She
smiled. “No they don’t.” How could she concentrate on anything with Jake so close, her small hand encased in the strength of his?

The
front door stood open.

“Nicky,
Jake, lovely to see you both again. Come on in.”

Magenta
drew them inside her home. Her interested gaze flickered over Jake before she looked away to acknowledge the sound of her name, and then turned her attention back to them.

“Are
you all set, Nicky?” She said softly, winking conspiratorially.

Nic
nodded. “As ready as I’ll ever be. I’m not sure why I let you talk me into this.”

“I
made you an offer you couldn’t refuse.” She laughed. “Or something like that. Besides, it will be a good experience for you.”

Nic
knew Magenta was one hundred percent right.

“Everything
we need is in the back bedroom. Just help yourselves to the food, and mingle,” she said, waving her arm toward the guests. “Terry’s around somewhere. He’ll take care of the introductions.” And she wafted off in the general direction of the noisiest group there.

Jake
and Nic exchanged amused glances. “What did she mean by that?”

“Oh,
nothing. Just girl stuff.”

Jake
looked as if he didn’t believe her. He’d find out soon enough. She wasn’t sure why she wanted to keep Magenta’s plans a secret. A little afraid of his reaction, maybe?

At
least he let his curiosity slide.

“Would
you like a drink?” he asked as a waiter approached with a tray of brimming glasses.

“Yes,
please, champagne and orange juice, if he has it. I feel like celebrating.”

Jake
handed her a long-stemmed glass, and selected a white wine for himself. They clinked glasses.

“To
your new career. May you have all the success you deserve.”

“Thank
you.” Sipping her drink, she gazed around. “This reminds me of a post performance party. Should we mingle?”

“I
suppose so,” he said.

Nicolette
picked up on the uncertainty in his voice and rested a hand on his arm. The feel of his warm strong arm and the hairs soft against her skin sent a tingle through her body.

“Is
everything okay, Jake?”

He
looked away, then back to her, his gaze soft. “Yeah.”

But
she wasn’t convinced.

“I
was thinking about how you cope, how you stay calm when facing your audience up close.”

“That
depends,” she said, feeling anything but calm in Jake’s presence. Even pulling her hand away from his arm had done little to stop the tingling sensations. “But what I face as a performer can’t be anymore daunting than what you have to face on location.”

He
shrugged. “I guess it depends what you get used to.”

“Possibly.
I know what I’m letting myself into with this new project. I hope I’m up to meeting the challenge, the expectations.”

“Danny
thinks you can. He speaks very highly of you.”

“I
know, I don’t want to disappoint him. He’s gone out of his way to give me this chance. That just adds to the pressure of taking on a new show.”

She
saw a flicker of something in his eyes at the mention of Danny’s name, but couldn’t quite work out whether it was disapproval, disdain, or a hint of anger. Jealousy maybe. That thought threw her a bit as she was fond of both these men in different ways. Why would Jake be jealous of her friendship with Danny? Then she remembered Danny’s words, that Jake thought she and Danny were an item. The penny dropped.

He
was jealous.

That
could only mean one thing. Goosebumps shivered down her back at the realization that she might mean more to Jake than he let on.

“I
have every faith in you,” he said.