December (The Page Sisters Book 1) (13 page)

He regards me with intelligent eyes that see through my dismissive facade. “It was a long time ago.”

“I know,” I whisper, tasting salt on my tongue.

He sets both of our bowls down on the bedside table, then hauls me in his lap. He holds me to his chest, gently rocking me back and forward. “I’m all right. I promise.”

“I know,” I mumble, biting the rugged flesh on my quivering bottom lip. “It’s sad. That’s all.”

“You have to stop feeling sorry for me. Yeah, I went through some tough years. We all have. It’s life. It’s what forms us, what makes us. And I’m stronger today then I was yesterday.”

“I believe you.”

He pauses from rocking me and tilts his head to look at me. He stares at my mouth before lifting his gaze up to mine. “Start acting like it, then.”

“I will.”

Josh reaches up to hold my chin. His thumb presses down under my bottom lip to pull the soft flesh from my busy teeth. He swipes at my lip and looks at his thumb. “You’re bleeding.”

“I bit my lip. It’s nothing.”

He holds my gaze captive as he brings the pad of his thumb to his mouth and licks my blood off. I stare fascinated by an act I’m sure that should gross me out or concern me. But it doesn’t. My heart is hammering and I have a pleasant flutter low in my belly. Josh slowly leans forward, allowing me enough time to pull away if I want. I don’t. I watch him kiss me, sucking my bottom lip into his mouth. He sucks at my lip until it tingles and pulses, like he’s trying to draw me into him. The sensation is almost too much.

“Josh,” I whimper, squirming in his lap.

His eyes are fierce and wild when he pulls back to look at me. “You taste fantastic.” His finger glides down the curve of my ear and I shiver. “I couldn’t help myself.”

Reaching up, I touch his handsome face. I use my thumbs to brush his pretty eyelashes. “We have to stop this.”

“What if I don’t want to?” He presses a soft kiss inside my wrist.

“We have to.”

“You love me, December. You said it yourself. And I love you. So why should we stop?”

My hands are curious and I simply like touching Josh. I touch his face, stroking his cheeks and hair. “Because you shouldn’t love me. I’m not good for you. I’m not good for anyone.”

He smiles, laughing. “You have to stop saying that, or I might give you a ring next.”

I hide my smile in his neck and shake my head. “You’re funny.”

His hand travels down my neck and touches the thin gold rope. His fingers tap the band that hangs from it. “I guess I am funny. You already have a ring. He’s always here with us, even when he isn’t. I’ve never seen you take his ring off, not once since we were kids or adults. We both know what he did. And it’s fucked up. I don’t see how you wear it, much less look at it every day.”

I stare down at the plain shiny golden band, feeling many mixed emotions. I can’t say they’re all pleasant. “I don’t think I can take it off. He gave this to me when I turned sixteen. I never wanted anything so badly. I love this ring, not everything it represents. But I love it. It feels permanent, you know. Like a tattoo.”

He wraps his hand around the band, closing his fist tight. Josh stares down at his hand, his mouth set in a deep frown. He looks upset. I’ve made him angry again with my big mouth. Why can’t I shut up?

“Don’t be mad.”

The trembling in his hand ripples up the chain around my neck. If he pulls any harder, he can snap the thin necklace in two. “It’s like a tattoo of his name, December. He’s branded you. So forgive me if I’m more than a little annoyed.”

“I’m taking you out tonight,” I say, changing the subject. “You want to go out?”

Josh drops his hand and nods, his expression tight.

“Okay. Good. We can go to your favorite club, drink ourselves into oblivion and come back here and pass out until late, late Sunday.”

T
HE
P
RESENT

Aquarius, the night club we’re in, is crammed with sweaty bodies. Aquarius is a club inspired by water. We’re surrounded by water. It’s trickling off stones, flowing down translucent walls.

The only requirement is that everyone has to wear white to get in. They have people with huge water guns spray on the crowd with glow-in-the-dark-paint. At the end of the night everyone is covered in glowing paint and dripping with foam.

The ice blue-colored smoke and fast paced laser lights make it difficult to spot a quality girl for Josh. We’re seated at the top level of the club in our half moon black velvet booths, overlooking the translucent dance floor. The dance floor has water and fish underneath it. It’s the first time people can say they walked on water.

Josh and Gray laugh and converse noisily behind me. They’re lively tonight. I down my whisky while I lean against the sleek steel railing, searching in the rowdy crowd for someone special. I spot a very pretty blonde but pass immediately. Josh doesn’t do blondes. When I say “do” I mean fuck. He says it’s because his mother was blonde and when he’s near a blonde woman who isn’t his sister, he either wants to choke her or run from her.

I’m glad he runs from them.

“December.”

A smile spreads across my face when Mia calls my name. I know her sweet and calming voice from anywhere. I face her and I’m stunned by her beauty. Her long hair cascades down her elegant shoulders in heaps of loose waves. Her exotic eyes are dark and twinkling in the dimness of the club. Her mom is Asian and her dad is black. That makes for one incredibly sexy ass woman.

“Mia,” I greet embracing her.

She matches my enthusiasm. “You look pretty.”

I roll my eyes and laugh. I’m wearing an old school white denim jumpsuit with a ratty Bob Marley fringed T-shirt underneath that displays half my stomach and I have air Jordan’s on. They matched the green, yellow and red in my shirt. I couldn’t help myself. Plus I hate heels.

“You are pretty. And you’re wearing a skirt in snowy December.” She looks like an Egyptian fantasy. Mia has on a gypsy flowy white skirt and a fitted white lace crop top. Gold armbands are painted on her gorgeous skin. Gold and metallic paint dusted on the sliver of skin on her leg that the long split in her skirt reveals. This must kill the guys. I’m even intrigued to find out where exactly the paint ends.  

Josh eyes Mia with interest as we head to the booth. He sits up straighter and smiles at her, then at me. I wiggle my brows at him. He totally has a thing for Mia. Josh has had a crush on her for the longest time. His feelings for me are just in the way. He can’t think clearly. But he will soon.

“Isn’t Mia a vision, Josh?” I encourage, purposely sitting Mia between Josh and I. 

“Yeah,” he replies huskily.

She laughs softly, nudging his shoulder with hers. “Thank you.”

He clears his throat, scrubbing his hand over his mouth.

I smirk, fighting a grin. That’s right, Josh. Wipe the drool off.

“Check out her really cool armbands.” Josh begins to trace one of the gold armbands with the tip of his pinky, following the intricate designs.

He stares at what his pinky is doing before looking up at her. “Are they painted on?”

“They’re flash tattoos,” she answers breathy and shudders. I can only imagine how good his pinky feels. “Temporary jewelry tattoos.”

His finger trails up to a golden feather that curves up the side of her neck, disappearing into the hair at her nape. “Yes. Very pretty.”

I smile inwardly. I am the best wingman ever.

“Oh, Fuck,” Gray says, crouching down under the table. “She’s coming.”

“Who is coming?” we all ask in unison, staring down at a pale-faced Gray.

“Tina, the chick I’ve been screwing for the past week.”

“Why are you hiding from her?” I ask, amused.

“Because I haven’t called her in the last three days,” Gray mutters. “She saw me with January last night. We were at Taco Bell.”

“Why is that such a big deal, you psycho?”

“That’s where I took Tina,” he grumbles. “I told her that’s where I take the women I really like. The truth is, I just really like Taco Bell. Oh, and January. Taco Bell and January together blew my mind. I can’t go back to Tina after having my mind blown. It isn’t the same anymore.”

“Gray, you so owe me for this,” I say, giving him a small kick under the table.

He winces and grabs my foot to keep it from kicking him again. “Okay, okay. Put it on my tab.”

Tina comes up to our table and smiles. “Is Gray here tonight?”

I put on my best fuck-off face annoyed. “And who’s asking?”

Her brows furrow and she cocks her head to the side, her gaze on mine. “Tina’s asking. I’ve been with Gray all week. I haven’t seen him lately. I want to know why.”

“It’s because I told him not to,” I say easily. “He’s my man. He belongs to me. He is mine. Gray is a natural wanderer. So I let him try out samples until he has had his fill. That’s all you are—a sample. He doesn’t want anymore of you, Tina.” I give her a dismissive wave. “You can leave now.”

She laughs humorlessly, taking off her big silver hooped earring one at a time. Everyone knows an angry woman removing large earrings is the universal sign for beating some ass.

Mia’s eyes are wide and horrified.

Josh can’t stop laughing.

I’m going to kick Gray again once this is over. Why is it me who has to fight his clingy chicks? I like to fight, but only my battles. I swear I would have more female friends if it weren’t for Gray.

“I’m going to fuck you up,” Tina says, tying her long red hair in a bun.

Sighing, I put my hair up into a ponytail with an elastic band from my wrist. I don’t want her to pull at it, either. Why do chicks always initially go for the hair during a catfight? “I’m glad I wore sneakers.”

“Ladies,” Gray says, crawling from under the table like he’s walking through a door. Gray doesn’t have any shame. He stands between us, shielding me from Tina with his body. “There’s no need to fight.”

Tina shoves at his chest and he takes a step back, making sure she doesn’t touch me. “Where the hell have you been for the past three days?”

“It’s over, Tina.”

“Because of that bitch?” she sneers.

“I’m
his
bitch, not that bitch,” I correct.

Tina lurches towards me, her eyes crazed and her claws out. I step forward but Gray pushes me back. Josh tugs at my arm until I follow him down the steps and out the exit. We’re in the back alley of the club.

“That was scary,” Mia says, zipping up her coat.

Josh nods. “Girl fights usually are.”

“It wasn’t my first rodeo, lady and gent,” I say, smoothing my bangs over my forehead. “I can handle myself just fine. But I am relieved I didn’t have to get into a physical altercation tonight.”

“So am I,” Mia agrees. “You guys want to get coffee?”

“Yeah,” Josh says, smiling at her. He offers his arm to her. She takes his proffered arm, her smile just as big as his.

The wheels instantly turn in my head. “That sounds great. You guys go on. I’m going to catch a cab.”

Mia pouts. “Are you sure?”

“Positive,” I reply. “You’ll have a great time with Josh.”

He scowls at me and I wink at him. He doesn’t fight me on this, which leaves me vaguely surprised. Josh turns his back to me and begins to lead her out of the alley. “Do you like hot chocolate? I know this great place a block over. They have the best hot cocoa in town.”

Sighing heavily, I stroll around in the snow and take my time as I walk to the front entrance of the club. There are waiting cabs that line the street. I get into one and go to the only place I’ve wanted to be. 

I tip the cab driver well, then exit the warm vehicle. My pulse is beating through my chest when I unlock and open the door to Danny's house. I feel like a nervous teen coming home way past curfew, as if my father is patiently waiting in the armchair to give me a good scolding when I walk through the door. Glancing around the simple leather and wood furnishings, I breathe a sigh of relief. The living room is bathed in soft golden light emitting from the ceramic lamp by the couch. Danny is nowhere to be seen, and definitely not sitting in the armchair as I imagined. But I know he's here. His Yukon is parked out front. Chloe comes charging down the hallway to me. She pounces on me and I fall to my knees, holding her in my arms.

“I miss you, Chloe. So much,” I say in my baby-talking tone as I kiss her and rub her.

She licks my face and whines, telling me how much she misses me. She lies flat on her back with her paws in the air, urging me to scratch her belly. I oblige and laugh at the way her tongue hangs out the side of her mouth.

“I miss you more, Chloe. Mommy loves you. And I’m sorry I’ve been away.” I scratch her stomach the way she loves and watch her foot vigorously kick. Her eyes shut. She’s enjoying her doggy massage. “I’ve been a bad mommy.”

“Yes, you have been a bad mommy.”

My hands pause on her belly. I look up at Danny, my heart fluttering at the sight of him in nothing but silk black pajama bottoms. His hair is combed back away from his face. His smooth brown skin is glistening with shimmering dew drops that cling to his strong shoulders and trickle down his abs in small rivulets. My mouth waters. He looks like he just got out of the shower. He leans against the wall, his watchful gaze on mine.

“Danny…” I clear my throat because I detest the sound of my husky voice right now.

“You’ve come home. Does this mean you want to be with me tonight?”

I nod, not trusting my own voice.

He slightly narrows his eyes and something I don’t recognize is working behind his retinas. “Come. We need to talk.”

I push to my feet. Chloe and I follow him into his bedroom. He allows me in, then shuts the door in Chloe’s face. I’m about to say something but I close my mouth when he looks at me. His deep brown irises penetrate through me, aware of many things I will never confess. Instead of digging a bigger a hole for myself, I sit calmly on the edge of the mattress.

He stands in front of me and crosses his thickly muscled arms over his bare his chest. “You know I’m not happy with you, right?”

“Yes.”

“Do you know why?”

“No.”

“Would you like to guess?”

“I’d rather skip the guessing and you tell me.”

He snorts, unamused and scratches his brow. “That would be nice, wouldn’t it? Skip all the nonsense and get right into what matters.”

“That’s all I’m trying to do here?” I say, shrugging casually.

He seems unconvinced. “Is it?”

“Yes,” I mumble. “Now tell me why you’re angry with me?”

“I shouldn’t even have to tell you, December. The fact that I do, lets me know where we stand.”

My eyes narrow, a frown marring my mouth. “Where do you think I think we stand?”

He glares at my ironic tone. “Not a very high priority.”

“Am I a high priority for you?” I ask, feeling suddenly defensive.

Something in his eyes flares. His expression is darkly solemn. “You’re my number one priority, December. You have been since day one. Jesus, you know that. I’m upset with you because you gave me an ultimatum. You wanted me to brutally and forcefully take your virginity or nothing at all.” He stares at me, the accusation transparent in the depths of his burning eyes. “I would have never done that to you, nor will I ever. You want me to be a man that will continually take and take from you. You expect me to be ruthless and cruel. You want me to be harsh and severe.” He shakes his head, repulsed with the very idea. “I am not that man.”

“No,” I agree. “You’re not that man, but you were that man.”

The fire in his gaze intensifies into a blazing inferno before it burns out into something cold and distant. “I’m not forcing you to be here, yet you’re here. Why? If I cause you unbearable grief, then why are you here with me?”

“Because I love you, Danny,” I half yell, half scream at him. My voice lowers to a whisper as I stare briefly down at my hands in my lap. “I missed you.”

His eyes remain on mine, aware of everything as he regards me coolly. “How long are you here before you’re not?” He says it without a hint of menace or irony, but the words sting. Danny’s words are hurtful.

I shrug it off like it doesn’t matter, like nothing matters. “I don’t know. We have the ceremony next weekend and then we’re all going to be in each other’s faces for an entire week.”

He remains impassive, not giving anything away. “You’re only here for tonight until I see you next weekend?”

“Probably.”

“I see,” he responds flatly. “What did you expect when you came here?”

“I wanted to see your face. Like I said, I missed you. That’s all.”

“Do you expect to fuck?”

His bluntness causes me to choke and cough. “I’m not putting it off or turning it down.”