Defenseless (4 page)

Me: Or what?

Dom: Mom is killing me! She’s up my ass, asking when I’m going to marry. She knows you’re a lost cause.

I roll my eyes. I’m not a lost cause, I just haven’t found anyone worth my time.

Me: I’ll think about going.

Dom: I’ll tell her you want to go shopping for a dress.

Me: I’ll tell her you’re running for senate.

I can imagine his face. The fact he’s taken a few minutes to reply tells me he’s staring at the phone with his jaw slack. Of course, there are only three people who know about his plans, and I’m not supposed to be one of them. I toss the phone and head into my home office.

This room gives me peace.

Once I’m inside, I close and lock the door, unstrap the gun from around my thigh, and pull the laptop from its hiding place. To the normal person, this is simply an office. It has light-blue walls, white eyelet curtains, and a huge white desk. It’s clean, neat, and deadly. This room is wired so I can see and hear anything in the entire apartment.

There are also more trap doors than anyone can imagine. Slowly, I pull the file that sits hidden between two others—the one that haunts my dreams; the only case I can’t solve—and hesitate to open it. I know every detail. Each word is ingrained in my mind, but I can’t stop myself. I look every single day, hoping that maybe I’ll find something I missed, and I can finally put a bullet in the asshole responsible for killing my father.

Mark

W
hat a day. I key in the alarm code and grab a beer from the fridge. My house is quiet, exactly the way I like it. This place is my only retreat from the crazy. I don’t take work home. I don’t even have an office. Just one giant man cave that all my friends hate me for.

I bought my bungalow in Sandbridge on the outskirts of Virginia Beach when I was stationed here years ago. It’s small, but it’s only me. This area is a hike to work, but it’s like living on my own private island.

With my beer in hand, I head off to the beach. Once I get to my favorite spot, I sit watching a few surfers and the sea stretched out in front of me.

The conversation with Aaron replays like a loop. So many things don’t add up, which makes me skeptical about his hunch. What the hell does Al Mazir have to do with any of us? He wasn’t a target on our missions. I don’t even think that terrorist ring was active back when I was a SEAL, or if it was, it didn’t have the same leaders. The region we were in during our time was more Iraq or Libya based, although I don’t know that it matters. Each time I think I have a handle on it something else throws me off.

Then, there’s the fact he wants to keep it from Muff, which I’d never do. There are some lines you don’t cross. Jackson would never get over being betrayed by one of us.

“Hey, Mark!” my neighbor Tiffany yells from the surf.

I should’ve brought my board. I always think better in the water.

I stand to greet her and push my hair back. “Hey, Tiff.” I smile. “How’re the waves?”

Her wetsuit clings to her body like a glove. She’s beautiful with her long dark hair, brown eyes, and killer curves. But we’ve already had that dance, and I’ve learned not to put your dick in places it can get slapped again. Luckily, Tiffany is cool and never wanted more than one night. According to her, I was a conquest, which works just fine for me.

“It’s good surfing! Go grab your board, there’s still time before the sun sets.”

I look at the sky and I could get in maybe an hour. “Let me—” My phone cuts me off.

Charlie. This woman is one I’d give my left nut to tame—or try to.

“I’ll catch you later. I need to take this,” I call off to Tiffany as I trudge up the beach.

I double-time it over a dune where the wind isn’t so bad. “I knew you couldn’t resist me.” I grin. She’s probably already wishing she didn’t call.

“Oh, yes.” The sarcasm is clear in her phone sex operator voice. “You’re always on my mind, Dixon.”

“I’d be happy to make you the next Mrs. Dixon.”

She scoffs, “I’m good.”

I smile at the opening she leaves. “That’s still to be determined.”

“You’ll never know.”

“I’ll take that bet.”

Charlie is the type of girl I would never imagine hooking up with. She’s definitely not my usual flavor. I like them tall; she’s tiny with an attitude the size of Texas. I like them blonde; her hair is practically black. Then there’s her body. I’ve always gone for the more Twinkie-type girls, but Charlie has curves. Her body is a weapon, one I’d like to take apart and get to know.

“Are you done now?” she asks. “I called for a reason.”

“Of course you did, Charlotte,” I joke.

She groans, and my grin spreads. “My name isn’t Charlotte, you asshole. Do you want my help? Or would you rather the company you work for continue to get screwed with?”

That got my attention. “Yes, Charleston, I want your help.”

“Fuck you.”

“Anytime, baby. All I need is a time and place.”

“I would destroy you.” Her voice drops low and menacing.

“I have no doubt. You’re one of those black widow type girls. A man-eater. But I’d gladly take the kill.”

Charlie doesn’t respond. She just let’s out a long breath.

“Okay, I’m sorry. You called because you have info?”

I can almost hear the internal struggle. The want to help, the want to not help, and then finally the resolution of what’s the right thing to do. We’re alike in that way. We both are willing to die for the greater good. I’m just way more badass than she ever could be.

“I’ll let you help me under one condition,” she finally warns.

“What’s that?”

“You understand who’s in charge. This is my case, I’m bringing you in, and therefore, I call the shots.”

I smile because the bottom line is that I’ll tell her anything she wants to hear. This has been my life for years, not some case. Whoever is responsible for all of this has destroyed the lives of people who matter. I consider Aaron and Jackson to be family. You fuck with my family and all bets are off.

Instead of playing my hand too early, I simply reply with what I need to say. “Deal.”

“Then get up to DC and I’ll read you in.”

“Thanks, Charlize.”

“I regret this already,” she mumbles, then disconnects the call.

“That’s all you’re going to tell me,” Jackson grumbles through the line.

Needless to say, he’s not happy about me leaving for DC. However, he doesn’t have a choice. “Want me to make stuff up?”

“I want you to tell me what you know.”

“I know nothing more than you know. She wants to help, thinks we can work together and find out what the hell is going on. What else do you want to know, Muff?” I can’t give him information that I don’t have.

“I’ll talk to Catherine, we’ll head back east. I need to be in the office if you’re not there.”

I laugh. I know how that conversation will end. Jackson’s balls will be comfortably sitting in her palm, where they are now, and he’ll still be in California. If the company wasn’t growing as fast as it was, it wouldn’t be a problem. I run the Virginia office while Jackson expands into an office near San Diego. We’re each positioned to run side by side near the closest naval base. Plus, it’s where the SEAL teams are stationed. It makes sense, makes recruiting easy, and makes us a lot of money.

“Stay where you are, man. Natalie is here, and she can manage more than we give her. Aaron is fully capable, too.” I laugh at the idea of leaving them together. “Plus, Erik has been taking on more. He’ll handle the communication system since Aaron is tied up with other stuff. Besides,” I pause. “There’s no way Cat will be on board with this. She’s got her clients and can’t leave. Let’s not forget, your office is barely even functional yet. What will you do here that you can’t do from there?”

He huffs. “I want to be kept informed.”

“No.”

“No?”

“You heard me . . . no.”

“This is my company, in case you forgot.” I can hear the anger rolling off him.

He needs to keep his hands clean. If this goes south, which it could, he needs to be completely clear. “Listen, I’m not going to explain all the reasons you need to have no knowledge of what I may need to do, but I’ll sum it up in two words: plausible deniability.”

“Mark.”

“No. I’m not telling you shit. I’m doing this my way so you can be happy in California with Catherine. I’m the only one in this goddamn group who has nothing to lose.”

“I’m not okay with this.”

“I really don’t care.”

“As your boss I’m ordering you to keep me informed.”

“Eh . . .” I pause. “I’ll think about it.”

“You’re a fucking pain in my ass.”

“And you’re ugly.”

Jackson sighs. “I’ll hold tight until I need to. Look . . .” He pauses. “We need to talk about what you keep avoiding.”

“Not now.”

“Mark,” he chides. “I’m serious. I want you to buy in, become my partner.”

“Good bye, Muff.”

I hang up the phone and push back from my desk. I should be happy—thrilled, ecstatic even—that he wants me to become his partner, but I’m not. It’s not because of the issues that seem to plague it. My entire post-military life has been about Cole Security Forces, but that’s just it. How much more do I need to make this my life? Is this all I’m destined to have? Jackson has Catherine. Liam and Natalie are married and making babies. Even Aaron has moved on and started dating.

I’m just here.

Stuck.

Stagnant.

Mark the eternal funny guy. Yet, I’m the one they all come crying to because they can’t keep their lives together. People get shot, divorced, screw up because they can’t tell each other the truth. I’m not sure if I want to do this for the rest of my life. I may want to open a surf shop in Hawaii, but if I buy into this, I wouldn’t be able to. Typical Jackson, though, he’s on his timeline and is pushing me.

I spend the next few hours wrapping up anything I can here. My e-mails are cleared, now I need to meet with the team.

Everyone sits in the meeting room with weary eyes.

“Welcome, my people!” I boom as I enter. Natalie smirks, Aaron looks unimpressed, Erik laughs, and the rest of our team appear confused. The only thing that shocks me is Liam standing in the back of the room with his arms crossed. “Well, it seems we have a new employee.”

Liam tips his chin down and eyes me cautiously.

Interesting.

“I’m just here to pick up my wife. She informed me that you were addressing the team. I figured I’d save her the hassle of replaying everything.”

Half of me wants to kick his ass, put him in his place because we’re not in the Navy here. The other half wants to clap him on the back and congratulate him on his balls dropping.

“Okay.” I clap my hands, loudly drawing their attention back. “I have some information to go over, and it’s going to be a while.”

Charlie

“Y
es, I understand.” My mind is at war with my mouth. I can’t seem to say all the things I want to. It’s years and years of perfecting my self-control, now coming to bite me in the ass. The truth is . . . I don’t understand one single thing.

“We’re not fully removing you, Charlie.” Tom sounds as though he actually believes the bullshit he’s spewing.