Desire and Duty (3 page)

“Oh, I’m not talking about those. I
mean the ones like Orman. The ones who are about something and have their lives
together.” She poked Gwynn in the ribs. “So? Did he?”

She knew she wouldn’t be able to
avoid answering, so she said, “Yes, he kissed me.”

“And?”

“What do you want, details?”

“No, but how was it? Do you like
him?”

“He’s wonderful.” She paused. “The
kiss was … nice. Good. Sort of surprised me, I guess.”

“How soon do you think he’ll
propose?”

Gwynn could do nothing but blink at
Tilly for a few seconds. “What? We’ve had one meal together.”

“But you’ve known him for years.
And he’s not one to waste time. He must be serious about you.”

“Aye, I’ve known him a long time,
but I was a child when he came here to finish up his training. I didn’t really
get to know him until the past couple of years.” She rearranged the tulips a
bit and then said, “Come on. We have work to do, and I need to check on Lord
Vane.”

“Oh, how is he? He’s the nicest
vampire I’ve ever met. And his brothers as well. The lord was so stuck up and
full of himself the last place we lived. He’d step on if you weren’t careful.
And I mean that literally.”

“Yes, Lord Vane’s wonderful. And
he’s doing well. I suppose. He’s seemed less lethargic.”

“Good. I hope they find his mate.
It’s kind of romantic. Maybe they can make up after all this time.”

“Maybe, but it’s been twenty years.
Arion probably got married and had a family.”

Tilly sighed as they rounded a
corner. “I know, but it would be wonderful to see Lord Vane as happy as his
brother.” She nodded in the other direction. “Got to get back to the garden.
See you later.”

“Bye,” Gwynn said before heading
toward the stairs and up to Vane’s room. She knocked and heard Lady Evane’s
voice tell her to come in.

Lady Evane looked very tired, but
she smiled broadly when she saw Gwynn. “Here’s something to cheer you up,
darling,” she said to Vane.

Vane punched a pillow and tossed it
back over his head before settling back to look at Gwynn. He managed a smile
but didn’t look well. She rushed over to his bedside and began rummaging
through the little basket on the table there. She selected the tea she’d made
especially for him and then filled the small kettle and lit the candle under
it. “I know it doesn’t taste as good as blood, but it’ll help your energy
levels.”

“I just didn’t sleep well. That’s
all,” Vane said.

Gwynn pushed up her sleeve. “How
about some fresh blood? Has to be better than the donated blood.”

Vane seemed to be considering it.
“It would taste better, but it wouldn’t be more effective. You need your
strength as well.” He smiled again, this one looking more genuine. “And I
wouldn’t want to make anyone jealous.”

She pushed her breath out in a
huff. “I’d box your ears if it wasn’t so nice to see you smile.”

Lady Evane laughed as she came up
beside Gwynn and patted her on the arm. “Do it, if you must. I’m going to go
get some sleep. He’s grumpier now than he ever was as a baby.”

Gwynn tried not to laugh, but she
couldn’t help it. Vane folded his arms across his chest and waited for his
mother to leave the room. “It’s nothing. I simply couldn’t get comfortable last
night, and she was fussing over me every damn time I moved.”

She sat on the bed beside him. “It’s
called loving you and worrying about you.”

Vane sighed. “You don’t like being
dependent on others. You have to understand how I feel.”

“Maybe. There’s never been anyone
to make a fuss over me. My mom died when I was so young. Had to see to myself
most of the time.”

“I guess I hadn’t looked at it that
way. You’re a lot like Alice, you know? I’m sure you’ve been told that. She’s still
missed by lots of people.”

“Aye, I like hearing people talk
about her. But I had Mrs. Allen. She kept an eye out very well.”

“Yes, I don’t see how she does it.”
Vane leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “Tell me how last night went.”

Gwynn wondered how much she should
say. Would he repeat any of it to Orman? She wanted to trust him but wasn’t
sure. People often threw ethics out the window when it came to matchmaking. “I
had a very nice time. I suppose you were right about Orman. He said as much.”

“Said I was right?” Vane said,
opening his eyes and almost smirking at her.

“No. Said he’d been interested in
me for a while. Why do you all care so much? I know it’s exciting or whatever,
but you can’t force these things.”

“We want you both to be happy.”

Could she be happy with Orman? She
couldn’t think of any reason why she wouldn’t, but she saw no reason to make
any assumptions yet. “I know.”

“You’ve always worked so hard. For
your family and here in the castle. You started pretty young.”

She laughed. “I was so bored! I
pitched in one day and did some dishes, and Mrs. Allen was so pleased I didn’t
break anything she kissed me. Startled the life out of me.” She shrugged.
“People recognize my strengths. I don’t like to be idle. I get things done the
right way the first time. I was telling that to Orman. I thought he just
admired my work and efficiency.”

“He admires far more than that.”

“Aye, I get that now.” She checked
the water and dropped a little sachet of tea in. “How about we leave off about
my love life before I go poking into yours? Hmmm?”

Vane gazed out the window. “I had a
dream about him last night. Ash and Locke arrived at his home and found that
he’d died just days earlier. That’s the real reason I was restless.” He turned
back to Gwynn. “He’s a lycan, but they still don’t live that much longer than
humans. And so many things could kill him. What are my chances really?”

“Stop talking like that.”

“Hard not to.”

She hated to see that look on his
face, so she said, “Orman kissed me last night, and it was wonderful. Best kiss
I’ve ever had, hands down.”

Vane gave her a half smile.
“Really? You aren’t just saying that to stop me being morose?”

“It’s the truth.” She pointed a
finger in his face. “But if you repeat that, I will box your ears.”

“All right, I won’t tell him. Did
you really enjoy yourself? I think you’d make a fine couple.”

She’d started down this path, so
she couldn’t backtrack now. “I had a very nice time. It was odd to be just
chatting, you know? Not talking about duties and responsibilities and things we
had to get done. I enjoyed that once I got used to it.”

“I don’t think you could find a
more devoted man, and you’ll be good for him. He’s an excellent steward—made
for it, really—but he lets it consume him. He needs to think of himself more.”

“Or have someone make him do so?”
She nodded. “I agree.”

As she poured a cup of tea and
coaxed Vane into drinking it, she thought about that. Orman did let his work
consume him, so if he could drag himself away from it for her, didn’t that mean
his feelings were pretty strong? She tried to hide it so Vane wouldn’t return
to the topic, but she couldn’t help smiling as she straightened a few things in
the room. Surprised as she had been at first, the idea of a man she’d always
admired so much falling in love with her definitely had its appeal.

****

Orman cringed when the porcelain
shard sliced into his finger. He took out a handkerchief and wrapped it around
his finger while he tried to clean up the rest of the pieces. He’d rounded a
corner and found a vase shattered in the middle of the floor. The corridor had
been silent, so he had no way of finding out what had happened. He crawled
halfway under the table the vase had been sitting on in his efforts to collect
all the pieces.

“There are these things we have.
Brooms. Much more effective.”

Orman recognized Gwynn’s voice and
froze. He moved carefully so as not to bump his head on the table. He already
looked undignified enough crawling around like this. “Yes, but I didn’t have
one on hand. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt so I was trying to clean it all
up anyway.”

“You can’t be everywhere at once
taking care of everything,” she said as she opened a cupboard in a little
alcove. She returned with a small broom and dustpan and handed them to him.
“Here.”

“You seem to do quite well at being
just where you’re needed. Gives me something to aspire to,” Orman said. He
cleaned up the fragments and looked around carefully for any he’d missed.

“What happened?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I rounded the corner
and found it shattered. No one in sight.”

Gwynn shook her head. “Probably
children playing. They move the fastest when they’ve done something wrong and
need to get away. I’ll ask around.”

“It’s just a vase. I don’t want to
get anyone in trouble.”

Gwynn raised one eyebrow. “Going
soft, are you?” She went back to the cupboard and came back with a bucket
before kneeling down beside him. They began loading the shards and bigger
pieces into the bucket. “Best the culprit is caught and shown he or she can’t
just get away with it. They have to own up to it.”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”

“Of course I am. Now, let me see
that finger.”

“I barely cut it. It’s nothing.”

Gwynn grabbed his hand anyway and
unwrapped the finger. “You’re right, but make sure you keep it clean.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, enjoying the
point of contact.

Gwynn eyed him. “You watch that
mouth. Don’t go forgetting your place.”

“My place? I thought I was above
you, but I’m starting to see the advantages of being under you.”

She stared for a moment and then
leaned in a little. “You know what stewards who go around seducing the maids
get?” she whispered.

“What?” he asked as he leaned in as
well.

She grinned at him. “What do you
think? They get laid.”

Orman burst out laughing, not
caring who heard him. “Where did you hear that joke?”

“I have six older brothers. Where
do you think I heard it?” She came forward a bit and pressed her lips to his
ear. “But you still need to watch that mouth.”

“Bit hard since it’s on my face.
You may have to do it for me,” he said as he angled his head to look at her.

“Have to do everything, don’t I?”
She kissed him full on the mouth and parted his lips with her tongue right
away.

Orman didn’t know what had changed
over the course of the day, but he wasn’t about to question it. He returned the
kiss as best he could at that angle and sighed as she pulled back. “See? You do
a far superior job.”

“Maybe,” she said as she sat back
on her heels. “Thank you for the tulips. They’re lovely.”

“You’re welcome.”

She stood and took up the broom and
dustpan. “You do know what tulips mean, right? Especially red ones?”

Orman stood up and hefted the
bucket. Looking into her eyes, he said, “I’m a fully trained steward, remember?
I know exactly what they mean.”
Passion,
a declaration of true love.

“Hmmm.” She put the dustpan and
broom away before coming back to his side. “I see.”

“I hope so.”

She pointed to the bucket. “You
know where to take that?”

“I think I do.”

“I’ll show you. Glass and porcelain
need to be collected around the back of the forge. The glass can be reused and
melted down again, but the porcelain is ground up and can be made into tiles.”

Orman nodded. He’d had some vague
knowledge of that but never given it much thought. Mrs. Allen usually kept
people informed on those matters. The castle seemed very quiet tonight, and
they walked in silence for a while. After he’d emptied the bucket, they moved
off toward the garden.

“Any news today? I know they can’t
have reached the lycan village yet, but I thought they might’ve sent something
back when they stopped,” Gwynn said.

“No, nothing today. Though I did
have one promising reply from Lord Erik. He said he’d met a man named Arion at
Yoshinaga just a couple of years ago, and he says we should try
Kyo’s
dominion because the man was a lycan. Has to be the
same man. Doesn’t guarantee that Arion is actually there, but makes it seem
more likely.”

“Hmmm, but was Erik just guessing he
was from that dominion because he’s a lycan, I wonder? Or did Arion mention
being from the settlement?” She sighed. “If Vane would’ve just told us sooner.
We could’ve mentioned it in all those letters you sent. Then Erik would’ve
known that was definitely him and maybe remembered some more details.”

“Don’t be too hard on him.”

“Why not? You were blazing mad
yesterday. Don’t you think it could’ve made a difference? Arion’s a pretty
unique name, aye, but being a lycan is even more unique, I’d say.”

“You’re right. I was furious he hid
such a key fact. But over the years I’ve been here, he has confided in me at
times. He puts on a brave face and tries to project confidence, but his heart’s
still broken. He made a mistake so soon after coming to power, one that
destroyed his chance at happiness.”

“He does make a big deal about
seeing to people’s needs. And he does ask a lot of questions when people bring
grievances. I can see why when you put it that way. But gods, he could live for
centuries. He has to move on.”

“Perhaps he’ll have some closure if
they bring Arion back here.”

“Or he’ll just be hurt again.”
Gwynn reached over and took his hand. “I don’t want that. You’re right. I
shouldn’t be so hard on him. Who in his right mind would invite pain?”

Orman squeezed her hand. “And he’s
pretty stubborn. He could still beat this.”

She stopped and looked up at him
before wrapping her arms around him and burying her face against his chest. He
dropped the bucket and wrapped both arms around her.

“You all right?” he asked after
more than a minute had passed.