Desire and Duty (4 page)

“Just so nice to have someone to
talk to and confide in.” She looked up. “Someone to hold me.”

“I’ll do that as long as you want
me to.”

“All night?”

Orman swallowed. “If you wish. You
just don’t want to be alone?” He’d do anything she wanted, anything she needed.

Gwynn nodded.

Pulling her closer, Orman caressed
her hair. “Then you won’t be.”

****

Gwynn walked along the breezeway
where they hung the linens to dry and felt all of the sheets as she passed
them. There didn’t seem to be anyone else around so she grabbed a basket and
began taking them down. She’d pulled about half of them off the lines when she
noticed someone helping her. That someone kept glancing at her.

“Hello, Tilly,” she said, throwing
two more clothespins into the little basket hanging on one of the stone
pillars.

Tilly grinned at her. “Details.
Now.”

“Details? About what?”
Gods, you’d think I was a vampire who just
found her mate the way they’re carrying on. Can’t my love life be at least
semi-private for a little bit?

Tilly folded the sheet in her hands
over her arm and came right up to Gwynn. “What you were doing last night.”

“Sleeping, you mean? That’s not
very interesting. I didn’t even dream anything. But I’m very rested, if you’re
so interested.” She knew Tilly was referring to the fact that she’d slept in
Orman’s room, but she wasn’t going to make this easy for Tilly.

“I thought we were friends, you
little hussy,” Tilly said with flimsy faux anger. She put the sheet in the
basket and moved on to the next one. She continued to eye Gwynn and eventually
said, “I guess it is private, considering what you two were doing.”

Gwynn picked up her own basket and
said, “Sleeping. That’s what I was doing. I simply wasn’t doing it alone or in
my own bed.” She turned away and said over her shoulder, “A girl doesn’t kiss
and tell.”

“But if you were only sleeping,
there wouldn’t be anything to tell, would there?” She took down the last sheet
and joined Gwynn in walking into the castle. “So
is
there something to tell?”

Gwynn looked around. “It goes no
further?”

Tilly nodded enthusiastically.

“I helped him clean something up,
and then we went for a little walk. I was tired and feeling kind of down and
stressed. Lord Vane’s like another brother to me. One who actually has time for
me, unlike my real
ones.
I’ve been worrying about him,
and it just got to me. I said I didn’t want to be alone, and I went to his room
with him. He was very kind, and he held me. That’s all.”

Tilly sighed. “That’s just as good
as what I was expecting. Maybe better.” She practically beamed at Gwynn. “He’s
just so sweet. You were right with what you said yesterday. Most of the men
here are just looking for a conquest. Or they want to marry you so you can cook
and clean for them and start having babies.”

“When you meet the right one, he’ll
just want you. He might want marriage and the babies, too, but he’ll be focused
on you.” They entered the folding room and put their baskets on the large table
in the middle. “He did kiss me when we parted in the foyer. I think he did it
to embarrass me.”

“I’m sure he wanted to.”

She laughed. “Oh, I’m not saying he
didn’t want to. I’m just saying he waited until we were outside his study,
where half a dozen people saw us.”

“Staking his claim, I’d say.” Tilly
dumped her basket and began pulling the pillowcases out and folding them first.

“Maybe.”

“And why is that embarrassing? Just
a kiss.”

“Everyone’s so stirred up. That’s
the thing. Like we’re important or something. Is everyone that bored?”

“It’s exciting. That’s all.
Everyone likes Orman, and he does nothing but work. Folks may be gossiping, I
guess, but they’re happy for him. And you.”

Gwynn shrugged. “I’ll give you
that. It’s not malicious. All giggling and teasing, like a bunch of children.”

“You going to tell him that
you’re,” she paused and looked around, “a virgin?”

“Aye. It’s not fair to not tell
him. I’m sure he’ll want to talk about that kind of stuff. He’s so thorough I
can’t imagine he’d be flippant or rush something like that. He’s made it known
he wants that. You know, when I’m ready.”

Tilly smoothed the wrinkles out of
the pillowcase in front of her. “I’m glad I’ve waited, too. There was that
almost time I told you about. He was nice at the time and said it was fine, but
he hasn’t really talked to me since. It just wasn’t right.”

Gwynn began folding a larger sheet,
spreading it over one end of the table. “What’s the rush? Plenty of time for
all of that. You’re even younger than I am.”

“I know.” She put her basket on the
floor and began tackling the sheets after putting the pillowcases on a shelf.
“I think it’s seeing Lord Ash with his mate that got me thinking the last few
days. Locke is just mad about him. They’re so lovely together.”

“They do seem happy.” She wondered
how they were doing on their mission. They’d probably reach Kyo’s dominion
today.

“I think it’s romantic. Them going
to find Lord Vane’s mate together. How far is it to the lycan settlement?”

“About three days ride at a regular
pace, but I’d bet they hurried it along and rode until nightfall. I’m thinking
they should get there today at some point. They rode out pretty early day
before yesterday.”

Another girl came in with some
kitchen towels. She smiled at them and began folding at another table. Gwynn
and Tilly went on in silence until they were done, and Gwynn left the room
first. Tilly came running after her a few moments later.

“Hey, I’m know I’m teasing you, but
I’m really happy.” Tilly smiled. “He’s wonderful, and you know he’ll treat you
well. I hope things work out.”

Gwynn couldn’t imagine things not
working out, but she didn’t want to say that. If Mrs. Allen got wind of that,
the castle gossips would have them engaged by nightfall. “He’s a good man.
There’s no denying it. But we’ll see. Liking someone doesn’t mean you can love
them.”

Tilly seemed to think about this.
“I guess.” She walked toward the stairs. “See you later.”

“Aye, keep out of trouble.”

“You, too,” Tilly said with a grin
before mounting the stairs.

Gwynn moved toward the family wing
to go check on Vane, but she stopped in the hallway when she saw Orman talking
with someone out in the courtyard. She watched him for a moment. He pushed his
dark hair off his face and nodded, his expression serious. Until now, she’d
never really noticed how broad shouldered and muscular he was. Since she was
only about five feet tall, she’d always been very aware of how tall he was,
towering over her by more than a foot.

“He is handsome, isn’t he?” Lady
Evane said at her side.

Gwynn gasped in a breath and turned
to face her. “Yes, he is, my lady.”

She smiled apologetically. “Sorry I
startled you. I thought you saw me walk up, but I don’t blame you for being
distracted.”

She hadn’t told anyone else this
yet, but she felt that Evane might understand. Gwynn didn’t know exactly how
old she was, but given Vane’s age she had to at least be in her seventies, if
not much older. She’d certainly seen more of life and the world than Gwynn had.
“I feel awful I didn’t see how he felt about me. But now as I think back, it’s
so obvious.”

“It happens that way a lot. I
wouldn’t worry about it. He certainly isn’t. Just relax and let what happens
happen. These things have a way of working out.” She gazed off, a slight frown
on her face. “Most of the time.”

Gwynn took Evane’s hand and
squeezed it, knowing the vampire was thinking of her son’s illness and the
situation with his fated mate. “There’s more hope now, you know? Of finding
Arion.”

Evane smiled, but it looked forced,
just as Vane’s smiles often did lately. “There is. They were fated to each
other for a reason. Maybe Vane got sick because the gods know how stubborn men
are.”

Gwynn laughed softly. “Aye, could
be.”

Evane traced the pattern in the
marble on the windowsill before shrugging. “We can only wait and see. If they
were to actually reconcile, Vane would be so happy. I’m tired of seeing that
sadness behind his eyes.”

Gwynn sighed. “He deserves to be
happy. He works so hard to make life here good for everyone.”

Evane smiled with pride now.
“That’s why he was chosen. Everyone saw how perfect he would be for this place.
The vampire before him was horrible. Just a monster really.”

“Aye, I’ve heard my father tell
some stories.”

Evane rubbed one eye and seemed to
shake herself. “Enough sad talk. I do hope you two are making enough time for
each other. There’s more than enough other people to get things done around
here.”

Gwynn tried not to blush, but she
still felt a little warmth in her cheeks. “We’ve been spending our evenings
together. It’s … nice.”

“Nice? Darling, snap him out of
that. Have you seen him at a barn raising? You need to get a closer look at
those muscles. They’re delicious.”

Gwynn stammered and literally
couldn’t speak as she watched Evane cast an appreciative glance out the window.
She finally burst out laughing. “Aye, I am taking more notice of his, uh,
physique.”

Evane giggled. “Then get on with
it. He bends over backwards to please everyone. I’m sure that’s true in bed as well.”

“Probably,” Gwynn said, truly
blushing now. She cleared her throat and said, “I’m going to look in on Lord
Vane. Was he sleeping?”

Sobering, Evan shook her head. “No,
he’s very restless. I was reading to him but needed to stretch my legs.”

“You refresh yourself. I’ll stay
with him for a bit.”

“Thank you, sweetheart. You take
such good care of everyone, but take care of you and that wonderful man as
well.” She gave Gwynn’s hand a squeeze and then headed in the other direction.

“Aye, my lady. I will.” Gwynn took
one last look at Orman before heading on to Lord Vane’s room.

Chapter Three

Orman sorted through all of the new
letters, his impatience getting to him. He knew it was unrealistic to expect
any news yet, but he kept hoping. It was also possible that Ash and Locke might
come straight back with Arion if they found him.

And it was also possible they
wouldn’t find him. Orman’s chest felt tight as he thought about that. He’d
begun training to be a steward when he was fourteen, and he’d come to Vane’s
dominion when he was only twenty-three because his mentor had been so impressed
by him. Vane’s former steward had finished his training up and stayed on for a
year to help him settle in. Orman never wanted to leave or be anyone else’s
steward. Vampires lived so long he’d imagined he would always be with Vane, but
now? He couldn’t bear to think about Vane dying.

He opened all the letters and began
sorting them. There wasn’t anything that important, so he organized them and
left them on his desk for later. He went down to the blood storeroom to ensure
everything was in order there. Most vampires drank donated blood until they
found their fated mates, as drinking from a living person often led to romantic
and sexual attachments. It was just too complicated. He looked over the ledgers
and did a sweep of the shelves. Everything seemed to be fine, so he headed for
the stables.

He spotted Gwynn with Vane, walking
above him along the open walkway that connected the family wing to the rest of
the castle. Gwynn was saying something to him, and he had his gaze focused
ahead. He looked as if he felt better, but from this distance, Orman couldn’t
really tell. He walked through the stables and made sure all the stable boys
and extra hands were going about their business. The stalls were clean, and all
the horses seemed content and attended to. He made the rest of his rounds,
ending up in the kitchen eventually.

Mrs. Allen nodded to acknowledge
him and went on kneading some bread. “About time, I’d say.”

“About time for what?” Orman asked,
wondering if she’d sent for him or something.

“For you to get on with it.” She
handed the ball of dough off to the girl beside her and began wiping her hands.
“What else in the world could I mean? It’s the only thing you’ve ever taken
your own sweet time to take care of.”

“Well, then perhaps you should’ve
nudged me. You’re right. I delayed far too long.”

“I’ve got a nudge for you. A ring.
Now. All those soldiers from the capital will be coming through the land soon.
You need to settle things before then.”

“I can’t propose to a girl two days
after telling her how I feel.”

“Why not? It’s like something in a
novel. Romantic.”

He knew it might be a mistake to
confide in her, but still he said, “Trust me, I’d propose this moment if I
thought she’d say yes, but—”

The look on Mrs. Allen’s face was
much too pleased, and her gaze was focused ever so slightly behind him. He
turned and, of course, Gwynn stood right there looking wide eyed, frozen in the
doorway with her hands on her hips.

As he fumbled for the right thing
to say, Gwynn strode into the room and gave him a mischievous grin. “Right this
moment, my answer would be … let me think about it.” She walked on past him.
“Just for your reference.” She kept going until she’d passed through another
door.

Mrs. Allen glared at him and
pointed. “Well, get on after her.”

“And what am I supposed to say?”

“You’ll think of something.” She
moved around behind him and gave him a shove. “Scoot.”

Orman considered going in another
direction, but he went after Gwynn when Mrs. Allen shot another glare his way.
He caught up with her quickly enough, and he wondered if she’d purposely slowed
her pace in case he’d decided to pursue her.

“Sorry about that,” he said.

“Why?” she asked, folding her arms
and looking up at him.

“Discussing something like that so
openly.”

She rolled her eyes and laughed.
“Everyone’s talking about us anyway. I’d rather they repeat truth they heard
from our own mouths.”

“I guess I should be pleased you
didn’t faint or run away.”

One eyebrow shot up. “You think you
could make me faint?”

“Hmmm. You’re right. I probably
couldn’t, though I would catch you if you did.”

“How gallant of you.”

“I’m trying. I can’t say I’ve had
that much experience. Once I left home and came here, I hardly had any time for
a private life.”

“But I’m sure there were plenty of
girls.”

He laughed. “Plenty? Is two plenty?
I’m not so sure.”

“Two? Really? That can’t be right.”

“Well, it is. There was Mary in the
castle where I began my steward training. I was eighteen. But her father had
other plans for her, so that didn’t last. And then there was a girl named Enid
here about a year after I arrived. She lost interest when someone highly
favored by the king looked her way.”

“What a bitch!” Gwynn said. She
gasped and slapped her hand over her mouth, glancing around.

Orman laughed and leaned closer. “I
think we’re alone. Don’t worry about it. I’m happy you can summon such ire on
my behalf.”

“Ire, hmmm? Disgust, more like.”
She shook her head. “Why do people do it? How can they just treat each other
that way?”

“I don’t know. She obviously didn’t
love me, though she’d told me she did.”

Gwynn’s gaze shot up to his. She
hesitated and then asked, “Did you love her?”

“I cared for her very much, but no.
And I told her as much. I said I thought I could love her but didn’t want to
rush into anything. I think she just thought about what she might gain being
married to me.” When Gwynn’s expression darkened, he said, “I’m not saying she
didn’t like me, but she obviously wanted something more than love from a
marriage.”

“Aye, I know some don’t have it so
good at home or with their lords. I shouldn’t judge.”

“Judge all you like. I love seeing
you angry on my behalf.”

“Sexy, is it?” she said, a teasing
lilt to her voice.

“You’re always sexy to me.”

She stopped and put her hands on
her hips. “Am I now?” She looked at her dress, which had a grass stain and some
kind of black smudge on it, not to mention a slightly frayed hem. He followed
her gaze as she noted them, but they didn’t bother him at all. She looked back
up and said, “Glad someone thinks so.” She glanced around. “I’ll see you
tonight, if that’s all right.”

“Yes,” he said softly. “I’d love
that.”

She gave him one final smile. “So
will
I
.” She turned and waved. “Until then.”

He waved as well, feeling eyes on
him as he did so.

He simply didn’t care.

****

Gwynn woke up in the middle of the
night. Her days had been full and long, and her evenings with Orman were the
only thing keeping her going as they waited for word about Vane’s mate. She’d
spent the last three nights in Orman’s bed, and he’d been a perfect gentleman.

She had come to the conclusion that
she didn’t want that anymore.

Rolling over, she slid her hand
over his chest. She ran it back toward his waist and pushed the material aside
to touch his skin. She’d gotten a feel of his muscles as he’d held her the last
few nights, but really caressing them was a completely new experience.

He took a deep breath and opened
his eyes, turning to her automatically with concern on his face. “Everything
all right?”

“Yes,” she said as she continued to
caress him.

To her surprise, he moved away for
a moment and lit a couple of candles. But when he turned back, his brown eyes
darkened as he gazed at her. “Want to see what I’m doing, if I’m not jumping to
the wrong conclusion here.”

She went into his arms when he
reached for her and said, “No, I think we’re thinking the same thing, as
usual.” She hesitated as she relaxed against his body. “But there is one little
thing.”

“All right. We can do as much or as
little as you like, just so you know.”

She smiled. “As much as I like?
Should an old man like you be making that promise?”

He ran his hand over her ass. “I’ll
keep my word, young lady.”

Taking a deep breath, she said,
“There’s just this one thing. I’m a … virgin, and I’m guessing you need to know
that. That it makes a difference and all.”

“Being with you would be special no
matter what. But yes, it’s good for me to know.” His hand settled on her waist.
“But be sure about it, all right?”

“I am sure. Never really wanted to
before. Been curious, but not enough to take any action.” She caressed his
cheek, amazed at how different he seemed now when she looked at him. She’d
always noticed his kindness, but now she could see his softness and
vulnerability, too. “I’d like for you to make love to me.”

Orman captured her hand and kissed
it before pulling her into a sweet embrace. He kissed her gently but
thoroughly, and she could feel her body reacting as they moved against each
other slowly. At first, he just kissed and caressed her, but then he sat up and
stripped his shirt off. She reached one hand up to caress him right away.

“Love it when you touch me,” he
said as he traced his fingers over the contours of her face. He unlaced the top
of her gown. She’d picked a very conservative one so he wouldn’t think she was
trying to seduce him, and now she just wanted the thing off. But she loved his
slow movements and let him continue. He parted the neckline and ran his
knuckles over her skin and the swell of her breasts. He pushed the material
aside and leaned down, kissing her skin and working over to her nipple.

She sighed when his lips closed
over it. She knew it felt good when she touched them and rolled them between
her fingers, but the caress of his mouth blew those sensations away. He moaned
as he suckled there and then swirled his tongue over the aching bud. “Need you
out of this gown,” he said.

She sat up and wiggled about to get
herself out of it. “My thoughts exactly,” she said, feeling a bit nervous about
what she was supposed to do. She wasn’t about to do any of the things she’d
heard her brothers talking about—some of them didn’t even make any sense.
Looking up into Orman’s face, she tried to relax. He was the first man to see
her naked. “I wore this old granny gown so you wouldn’t think I was moving too
fast.”

Orman’s gaze roamed up and down her
body before he focused on her. “When it’s the right person, it doesn’t matter.
They don’t judge.” He cupped her cheek. “Just relax. But tell me to stop if you
don’t like something.”

“I liked what you just did,” she
said, her voice almost inaudible.

His hand moved up to her other
breast, and he ran his thumb back and forth over her nipple. She drew in a
breath as he did so, and he leaned in and kissed her neck. “Are they
sensitive?” he asked.

“Right now they sure as blazes are.”

He pushed her to her back and took
her other nipple into his mouth. His movements were gentle but not tentative.
His fingers caressed her stomach, and she knew for a fact she’d misjudged him.
The man knew exactly what he was doing, and he was about to prove it. He spread
her legs but only caressed her thighs at first. He kissed down her stomach and
moved between her legs.

She’d never heard anything about
this. Orman kissed her thighs, and she started to tremble. She could feel how
wet her pussy was, but it didn’t seem like they should be getting to that yet.
When he pushed her curls aside and flicked his tongue over her clit, the
pleasure overwhelmed her so much she didn’t have more than a second to feel
stupid for not getting what he was about to do. A little cry came from her
mouth, and he chuckled against her flesh as he licked and sucked on her clit.

“Guess you never imagined me doing
this to you,” he said before swirling his tongue again.

“Gods, no, but don’t you dare
stop.”

He chuckled again before licking
her slit and then sliding one finger into her. He worked his fingers in and out
as he teased and tormented her clit. It hurt a little every now and then, but
the next moment would feel so good she didn’t dare object. She’d ridden so many
horses she wasn’t worried about pain that much, but she couldn’t do anything
about how tight she was. She sighed as he drove deeper and moved his fingers
apart gently, as if reading her thoughts and trying to loosen her up. He moved
two fingers in and out as the tension built to the point she didn’t think she
could take any more, and then he quickened the movements of his tongue and sent
her soaring. Her blood roared in her ears as the pleasure drove higher. He thrust
his fingers deep as her pussy squeezed them. The release felt better than any
she’d ever given herself. When he finally drew back, she watched him suck his
fingers clean. The sight sent another tremor through her body.

She couldn’t think of a thing to
say, and probably
couldn’t
have spoken if she had
thought of something. Instead of seeing to his own need, he climbed back up her
body and kissed her neck and cheek. Then he captured her lips. He hadn’t
finished undressing, but she could feel his cock pressing against her leg. He
simply went on kissing her, gazing down at her in a way that made her tremble
in a completely different way.

He stood up and slid his linen
pants off. One hand stroked over his cock as he watched her, possibly trying to
gauge her reaction. She eyed him, wondering if it would be the width or the length
of his cock that would give her the most trouble. She lowered her gaze as he
moved back onto the bed. He knelt between her legs and leaned over to kiss her.
Not penetrating at all, he simply guided the head of his cock along her wet slit
and over her clit. When she returned his kisses with more heat, he spread her
with his fingers and slid in a bit. There wasn’t any pain, but the invasion
felt odd. He looked a bit tentative, so she wrapped her arms around him.