Diary of a Vampeen (18 page)

“A block from my studio apartment, out
of nowhere I was attacked and dragged into a back alley. I felt the
bite, the sharp teeth cut into my skin and I went limp. Mentally I
was there, and though I felt the pain, I was paralyzed and could
not defend myself. Seconds later a dark figure knocked the vampire
away from me. The blood poured out of me and I lost consciousness;
unaware of what had taken place.

“When I woke, I was alone in my
apartment. My two windows had been nailed shut and black fabric was
tacked temporarily to their surface. On the table next to my couch
was a letter instructing me to read a book, which ultimately
divulged my fate. Within seventy-two hours of my bite, I was a full
vampire without a master to guide me. I had to abandon all I knew
without understanding what was happening to me.

“Five years later I met Phoenix, a
south-western vampire visiting the city by mere impulse. He was
created in 1782 at the age of nineteen. He is Native American and
was scouring the woods, hunting, when he was attacked. His own
father killed the vampire, but they were unable to save him from
the poison that lurked in his body. It was Phoenix who saved me
from insanity. He took me under his wing and showed me how to
survive, how to cope with my new world.

“It took me forty years to come to
terms with my new identity, and another forty to feel normal in any
manner. It was then that I met my dear Beth,” he looked into her
eyes passionately. For this one brief moment, I felt like I was
intruding on a private moment. “She loved me despite what I was or
who I killed. She unveiled the human trapped within me and ignited
my passion for life.

“I was never able to see or speak to
my parents again. I had to relinquish everything for nothing Lexi.
You are far more blessed than I was. For five years, I wandered
aimlessly trying to comprehend myths and legends as reality alone.
You have the support I needed in numbers. It took me an entire
lifetime to come to terms with my transformation, but your laws are
different and your lifespan not as infinite,” he warned with
sincere concern and prompted awareness on my part.

“What do you mean?” I asked
warily.

“Both our hearts still beat, but it is
far easier to kill a vampeen than a vampire because you are guided
by your humanity while we are guided by our instincts. Look what
happened to your Gran,” he offered thoughtfully.

“Wait. What are you talking about?
Mom, what happened to Gran?”

It was only then that I thought back.
My gran always appeared far more youthful than she should have. I
never saw her past age five, though we talked in length every
weekend. We were very close despite our physical distance. The same
with Pap, though I never saw him past two.

“Lexi, that is how our kind die; we
are killed,” she answered softly.

“How? I mean why?” I questioned
frantically.

“The vampire war surges deeper than we
let on. We have been destroyed by our own kind in most cases, and
occasionally murdered by exposure to the human world,” my aunt
responded.

“So what will happen to me? I realize
now that you and mom are not simply aging gracefully…” I pressed,
still frazzled mentally.

“Twenty-five. The vampire cells go
from fifty-one percent at sixteen to seventy-six percent at
twenty-five, which stops the aging process of your integumentary
system for your skin but doesn’t affect your hair and nails,” she
answered directly.

“So if I choose a human, as you have
Dad, I will outlive him. I will inevitably choose to love and lose
knowing fate?”

I saw the sadness in her eyes before
she even replied. “Yes.”

“Unless,” Kellan spoke for the first
time in a while, “You have him changed. There are vampires willing
to change a human for a fee.”

My mother’s eyes filled
with fury in conjunction with Kellan’s remark. For once, their
green hue seemed hazy; the outer ring of her irises began to
flicker a red-orange. She darkly scowled, “That is
never
an option if you
truly love. You would never curse the one who brightens your
world.”

“I was just informing Lexi of her
options.”

“Again, that isn’t an option,” she
reinforced.

So this was my fate. This
was my world as of Thursday at midnight. I knew in watching
True Blood
and reading
books such as
Dracula, The Vampire
Diaries, Interview with a Vampire
and
Twilight
that the lives and world of vampires was complex and took
self-control to survive in; even fiction captures this essence
accurately, though this seemed three times more difficult to
maintain. I literally would be entwined in three worlds with
enemies lurking around every corner – the human, vampeen and
vampire world. They each had separate rules, restrictions and
dangers. Suddenly I would rather be a fat, lonely
teenager…

Chapter 11

Once my mom cooled down, I opted to
return to bed. I had heard all I could take for a lifetime, let
alone one night. Even worse… my best friend was lying beside me
sleeping and as much as I wanted to wake her up for advice and some
much needed comfort, I couldn’t. This part of me must forever
remain a secret to her.

Here I lied in the middle of the night
tossing and turning in my bed; I felt like my life was just one big
charade. Everything I’d known until now about my parents, my
family, my lifestyle… it’s all one huge façade in numerous ways.
Not one piece of my life was solid; not one person a permanent
fixture anymore.

Finding out that Gran was killed was
heart wrenching. I remembered the sweet angelic voice on the other
end of the phone every weekend reminding me to avoid burnt popcorn
if I wanted my hair to stay straight. She believed the funniest
wives tales. I missed her terribly. I was at peace before thinking
she passed in her sleep, but with this new revelation being
revealed to me, I felt her soul ablaze. She must have been
disturbed. How could any soul peacefully retire when it was
abruptly forced to leave its physical refuge in
violence?

“Ugh,” I sighed aloud, “I will never
get back to sleep after all this.”

“Then you won’t mind a visitor?” I
heard a familiar voice inquire.

I sat up and turned my attention to my
bedroom door. It was slightly ajar and standing just beyond its
frame was a tall male figure I recognized as Kellan. “Umm, no… Come
in,” I mumbled.

“So… Interesting night,
huh?”

“To say the least. I don’t know if I
will ever be able to wrap my mind around all of this,” I stated
still soaking in the events of an hour ago. I fiddled with my nails
atop my thick comforter. Thank God Mel was a sound sleeper. I don’t
know how we could have explained tonight to her.

“You will in time. I know how you
feel. It’s overwhelming, but you have good people supporting you
like I did. Just try not to overanalyze every detail. I know you
are and that’s only making it worse for you,” he said while walking
closer towards me.

“Huh,” I chuckled softly. “Yea, you’re
probably right. I can’t help it though. It’s just how I
am.”

“Hey. I know this is going to sound
crazy, but you want to go for a walk outside for a bit? It
sometimes helps me organize my thoughts,” he offered seeming a bit
anxious.

“Right now?” I crinkled my forehead in
disbelief.

“Yea.”

“But it’s night out… And it’s cold,” I
stumbled to chuck up some sort of excuse.

“You can bundle up. And you can’t tell
me you’ve never walked around at night before. You might as well
get up before I make you,” he warned.

“Ugh, fine,” I groaned. I looked up at
his gorgeous face. Unable to make out all of his features, I stared
at the one prominent part of him that captured me, his breathtaking
smile and one dimple inset appealingly. He was beaming in radiance
before me, his teeth pearly white were slightly iridescent. Though
he didn’t confess, I knew he enjoyed spending time with me just as
much as I did him. Whatever this bond was between us, it stretched
beyond our basic comprehension. And I would have liked to rely on
Mel to stay asleep since she’d slept through hurricanes and
tornados, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

I slid down off my bed and into my
flip flops. Luckily I was wearing toe-socks already so I didn’t
have to dig for them. I threw on my red aeropostale hoodie and
retrieved my cell phone as I walked towards the door. Kellan stood
guard the entire time watching me as if I was planning a secret
escape. “You can relax. I’m not going to cop out on you,” I said
slightly teasing his demeanor.

“Sorry,” he shrugged.

By the time we reached the bottom of
the stairs, my mother and aunt were standing there expectantly.
“Just where do you think you’re going at this time of night Lexi?”
my mother demanded.

As much as I would have liked to
oblige her earlier unspoken request to stay safe, Kellan wanted to
go for a walk, and frankly, I could use a little fresh air. “For a
walk with Kellan. We won’t go far and we won’t be long. I
promise.”

“I’ll keep her safe Mrs. Jackson,”
Kellan firmly stated.

My mother and aunt exchanged worried
glances amongst all four of us before agreeing. The terms: we had
to be back in twenty minutes or they were coming after
us.

Kellan opened the door for me. A gust
of wind beat against me as I stepped outside. “Why did I agree to
this again?” I whined sarcastically.

“Because you like me,” he smugly
replied.

“Ugh. Don’t remind me.” I hated the
fact that Kellan knew where I stood with him. He knew he’s
attractive and charming in his dark mysterious way. He’s cocky and
shy at once. It drove me insane, but I still loved it on
him.

“I’m really not that bad. It could be
worse. You could like Jason.”

“Gross! That’s a never! Point
made.”

He chuckled nervously. “I did want to
walk with you for a reason though, but not here.”

“Where then? We only have twenty
minutes,” I reminded him. Without notice I was scooped into to his
arms and traveling at what felt like the speed of light. “Where the
heck are you taking me Kellan?!” I demanded as the wind slapped the
left side of my face. He just laughed and continued to run down my
street un-phased by my sudden panic.

“Close your eyes.” I hesitantly
obliged by curling into him. I placed my face into his chiseled
chest right as the wind tripled in force. I felt like I was dropped
into a wind tunnel.

Moments later he slowed to a jog and I
turned to observe my surroundings. It took a minute for my eyes to
adjust. It didn’t matter though; I didn’t recognize the area.
“Where are we?” I looked around at the meadow of grass before
me.

“The thirteenth hole,” he replied
setting me down.

“Nice, but why here? It’s not like you
have any more big secrets left to reveal to me.”

“Or do I?” he said with a Dr. Evil
tone.

“Shut up!” I laughed smacking his arm,
as if he would actually feel it. He led me towards a small hill set
amongst the surprisingly flat tourane. I followed his lead in
sitting on the cold ground; I always defaulted to an Indian style
position. “So what do you want to talk about?” I folded into my
jacket a bit more trying to survive the breeze.

“Why do you like me?” he returned
seeming a bit distracted by his thoughts.

“What?” Was he really asking me this?
Was he seriously putting me on the spot like this?! I was
embarrassed enough that he knew undeniably about my crush, but he
was extending it to a detailed level with bribing specifics to be
exposed.

“Why do you like me?” he
repeated.

“I can’t believe you’re asking me
this…”

“Please just tell me the truth Lexi. I
need to know why.”

Despite the temperature of the earth
below me, I laid back and heaved a loud sigh. I really didn’t want
to answer the question, but then again, he already knew I liked
him. Why did it matter if he knew specifically why? I knew I was
going to cave eventually; Kellan was not the type of person to
admit defeat. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before
spilling my guts to him.

“I like you because your smile lights
up the room I’m in, because you’re funny and approachable yet dark
and mysterious. You’re friendly and share your stories with me, but
keep me wanting more with your games sometimes so I know I would
never be bored with you. You are the first guy to walk in and
figure me out in a minute and while I never prided myself on
enjoying men as a challenge, you are the first to make me rethink
that effort. Aside from the fact that you are the only student in
my school that shares my heritage, you are also the only guy I have
met that invigorates my senses. Something about you ignites my
mind, drives me mentally, emotionally and physically in a way I’ve
never experienced. At first I thought this was just a little crush,
but over time I’ve come to realize that I like you for far more
than what meets the eye. You’ve awakened the dead within me simply
by your presence and a blooming friendship. And while it’s true, I
want more, I would never jeopardize what you’ve given me at this
level for a delusional dream I have for something beyond
that.”