Diary of a Vampeen (20 page)

“Don’t forget we have an assignment to
complete,” I reminded him verbally though physically I inched into
his arms. I’d already messed up. I was supposed to be distancing
myself from him, not drawing closer.

“Consider this part of the research,”
he said.

“How do you figure?”

“I’m exploring love to accurately
portray it from Romeo’s perspective.”

“I’ll allow that lie to pass but only
because I’m comfortable.”

Pulling me in tighter, Mike asked
intently. “Lex. Please be honest with me. Are you in any
danger?”

I froze. He hit the nail on the head.
I was possibly in danger, but could I tell him? Putting off any
overanalyzation of the situation, I decided to tell him as much of
the truth as possible. Perhaps I needed to tell someone in order to
really sort through it.

“A sort-of related person to me was
killed last night. Murdered. Whoever killed her is unhappy with my
family. My mom believes whoever this crazed person is may come
after me next.”

I braced myself, unsure of what his
response will be. Anger? Outrage? No. I was almost angry with him.
He broke into laughter. I was stunned.

“Are you seriously laughing?!” I
demanded pulling away from him to see his face.

“Calm down Lex. It’s just. Well…why
would anyone want to kill you? You have a better chance of being
hit by a bus.”

“Ugh,” I groaned. “You don’t
understand.” I sat up completely on the bed and began fidgeting
with my hands again. I was wrong to believe this could ever work
between me and Mike without being able to tell him my secret double
life; he would always brush off the danger surrounding
me.

He copied my movement and observing my
distaste to his reaction added, “Babe. If you really feel like your
life is in danger, then I’m going to be here every minute I can to
protect you.”

This time it was my turn
to laugh. I initially flashed to Mike pursuing Kellan in physical
combat. “No offense, but how do
you
plan to fend off a killer?”

“Easily. I’m a master in Krav Maga.
Been practicing it since I was five,” he answered.

“What is that?”

“It’s basically like karate for the
Israeli army. It’s street fighting but war-style,” he
explained.

“Why didn’t you tell me this last
weekend?”

“I didn’t feel the need to. Also it
kind of scared off a girl or two before. They were afraid I’d use
it on them but I’m not that kind of guy,” he insisted.

“Oh, well, I consider that a good
thing,” I smiled. “It’s always good to know how to defend yourself
and your loved ones.” I felt the gut-wrenching truth clenching my
insides. Mike didn’t stand a chance, and neither did our
relationship.

“Good,” he stated pulling me back into
his arms. “I really won’t let anything happen to you
babe.”

“I know,” was all I could muster up. I
knew now that Mike could protect me against the worst of human
attackers, but he still stood no chance of winning against a vamp.
I didn’t know if he would even do that though once I broke his
heart.

“So Romeo’s point of view in the
theatric form,” he prompted trying to distract me. It
worked.

“What do you have so far?”

“Oh yea, about that. It’s not very
good.”

“I kind of guessed that when you
begged for my help.” He grabbed his book bag and I retrieved my
English binder to coordinate with him.

“Do you want me to read what I have?”
he asked.

“Sure.”

“It’s kind of about you,” he added
shyly.

“Really? I’m intrigued.” Mike was
frighteningly dedicated to me at times. This lied wearily on my
surface. My world was upside down; it rolled in the course of a
week. My entire life was consumed with new concerns right now and
as good as his intentions were, his words added to this stress line
preparing to fracture me.

He pulled the lined paper filled with
words from his binder and began to read.

“What a twisted world love lies
within, for I am forced to love in anguish. Wars, family feuds
distract all rational and bar my desires from existence. I must
silently watch my heart walk by or speak softly with her through a
window in the dead of night. It’s as if my heart is caged, it’s
demanded to remain tame despite the tease or lingering passion
outside.

“Her voice, her words spoken aloud
detest all she is confined to. She lures me in with rivaling
rebellion, and captures me with a secret smile.

“Oh! What a torturous realm love lies
within! It dangles my desires in front of me but presses murder
upon me shall I show weakness. My life is torn amongst deadly
romance or a dull approved existence.

“Shall I be forced to reveal my choice
aloud, I will forever accept to love my true. I’d rather die
happily knowing her embrace. I’d rather love and lose than to pine
through a life of mediocrity forever regretting my choice to let
go. To know love is to live in prosperity, to not, is to ward off
death at every corner.

“Juliet, my fair Juliet, is the air I
breathe, the pitter of my heart. She’s the only one to touch my
soul, to attach strings to my heart. I shall not abandon all I know
for one kiss, but I shall die a silent poison to defend the love I
hold for my dearest enemy, Juliet.”

I sat speechless. These words poured
from the mouth of a skateboarding goofball with an overbearing
personality? I’d never heard such beautiful lyrics strung with
strife yet intertwined with reality.

“I told you it was bad,” he blushed
taking in my silence, mistaking my awe for disapproval.

“Actually, it’s the most beautiful
monologue anyone has ever written.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really. It’s perfect
the way it is. You need
no
help from me,” I stated in a daze, lost in his
features in the dimming sky outside my window. Mike was going to
make some girl very happy one day; unfortunately, that girl
wouldn’t be me.

“Umm. Are you sure?” he
pressed.

“Positive. But one question. How was
that about me?”

“Well. You’re probably going to be
weirded out but I care about you a lot Lex. I can’t explain it or
control it. I’ve tried not to like you, but it’s like we have this
connection, like destiny, that I can’t shake,” he answered
seemingly embarrassed with every cautioned word of explanation.
“And I’m to the point where I would rather embrace it and die than
deny it and try to carry on.”

Here I was hearing him say the words
every girl dreamed of being told, and yet irrationally I was
saddened by it all. Perhaps because I knew his words were wasted on
me. Perhaps because I knew I couldn’t indulge in them even for a
minute. Mike complicated things for me. Every time I planned to
pull away, he did something sweet like this and lured me back
in.

“Lex. Can you please say something,
anything? I’m dying here. You’re too quiet.” He stood shifting back
and forth before me.

I didn’t know what to say, but wanted
to alleviate his anxiety. I stood up and gently leaned in and
kissed his cheek. I allowed my hands to cradle his face as I
studied him for a brief second. “You really are wonderful,” I
smiled sadly.

I saw the confusion on his face but
pulled away before I was forced to deal with it.

I caught a glimpse outside via the
corner of my eyes but was alarmed when I saw pure darkness beyond
the glass. “What time is it?”

Mike looked at his Nautica watch that
his dad gave him for Christmas last year. “Umm. It’s 5:15,” he
replied.

“Wow. It’s dark extra early tonight.”
I sighed inwards knowing I’d successfully changed the subject. I
just hoped it would last.

“Yea, I actually prefer the dark
though. I’m definitely a night owl.”

“Nice. So what do you want to
do?”

“Doesn’t matter,” he shrugged
returning to sit on the bed.

“How about a movie?” I got comfortable
on the other side needing a little space.

“Sounds good.”

I sat up and grabbed the remote to
turn on my TV. I flicked it on and passed it off to Mike. “Find
something good.”

“No pressure,” he laughed.

I stood up walking towards the first
window and closed the blinds and curtains. I shifted to the next
with a shock. Staring at me were two bright green eyes in the
darkness. Caught off guard I screamed and jumped back. I turned
around to Mike alarmed on my bed and my mother inside the door,
unable to hide her speed in a moment of panic.

“What is it Lex?” Mike asked
anxiously.

I looked at my mother and replied, “It
seems I have a creature friend outside my window.”

My mother understood that it was
Kellan. She simply stated, “I’ll have your father get rid of it,”
and left my room.

I closed my blinds and curtains
quickly and returned to Mike on my bed to enjoy the last of my full
human night. Despite the impending break-up, I relished in Mike’s
company. After all, he was still my friend.

Chapter 13

We settled on
Dracula: Dead and Loving It
with Leslie Neilson. Mike knew I liked Dracula and admitting
my love of the comedic side of his story portrayals in the past, I
didn’t try to insist otherwise.

He handed me my bag of pretzels still
sitting next to my now warm coke on my nightstand and demanded,
“Eat. Don’t think I forgot about your anorexic
tendencies.”

“Do I look anorexic?”

“You do seem five pounds smaller since
this morning,” he smirked.

I couldn’t tell if he was trying to
flatter me or if he was implying something so I just glared at him.
But when he continued smiling brilliantly at me, I softened saying,
“I think I can afford the five pound loss,” with no harshly implied
undertones.

“Lex, you’re perfect just the way you
are. Please don’t become one of those carb obsessed,
calorie-counting cheerleaders. I like a girl with curves. I like to
think of it as excess sexiness.”

My heart melted. Never in my life had
anyone, my parents included, said something so close to eluding
unconditional love. I allowed myself to scoot closer to him and
retrieved a pretzel from the bag happily biting into it. Mike
copied my move and we watched the movie on demand for the next hour
and a half munching pretzels.

Stuffed of my carbed-up dinner, I
handed the bag completely over to Mike and laid back on my side. He
copied my move. After a few minutes I looked up to see him staring
at the ceiling, but could tell his mind was further
away.

“What are you thinking about?” I
prompted politely, not wanting to disturb his thought process
entirely.

“Umm… Well, just life I
guess.”

“You guess? You mean to tell me you
don’t know what’s on your mind?”

“You’re on my mind,” he threw out
casually.

“Hopefully in good forms.”

“Duh!” he said mocking Mel perfectly
in his rendition, “I mean get with it Lex!”

I couldn’t help but break into
laughter. He even escalated his voice into a higher octave. “That
is so Mel! You did her perfectly!” I exclaimed between
chuckles.

Mike turned on his side; we were face
to face, as he noted, “I love your laugh.”

“Umm… Thanks.”

“I love you Lex,” he said, running his
hand over the apple of my cheek.

I just gazed at him for what seemed
like hours but was only about two minutes.

“Uh, I don’t know what to say,” I
finally replied. He really was innocent and more than I deserved in
devotion thus far.

I couldn’t help but retract to my
lingering transformation set for tomorrow night though. So much
would be different a few days from now; I would be very different.
I didn’t want to hurt him, but, other issues aside, I knew I
couldn’t be a successful girlfriend to him after tomorrow. Why did
this have to happen now? Why couldn’t he approach me last year when
I didn’t know about my impending doom?

Ok…you need to get a hold
of yourself Lexi! What if-s and why didn’t-s don’t change what
is.

I pulled away the second I heard
honking outside. I was saved from having to console him in any way
for my less than desired response.

“That must be my mom,” he said getting
off the bed. “Thanks for the help.”

“You really didn’t need me, but I
enjoyed my time with you,” I smiled as I followed him down the
stairs.

“I always enjoy spending
time with
my
girl,” he said as we reached the front door.

“Night Mike,” I said giving him a
quick hug.

“Night Lex,” he said kissing my
forehead before walking out the door.

“Lexi,” my mother called startling me
with her presence the moment I closed the front door.