Dipping Into Sin 2: Digging Deeper Into Sin (3 page)

Chapter Four

Simone

            “
Grandma, I’m going to work now,” I
whispered as I walked past the living room to head out the front door. Mrs.
Teller, the head nurse in my unit, asked if I could cover an overnight shift. I
absolutely hated the overnight 12-hour shift, but I was grateful that I was
able to get the time off to attend the funeral. Withdrawing my car key, my eyes
became blinded by the bright beaming lights. Bringing my hand to my eyes, I
attempted to adjust my vision to further inspect the parked car.

This quiet residential neighborhood was occupied
by the elderly, barely had any activity going on…especially at this time. Yet,
this vehicle parked a house away from our home, looked suspicious. Pressing the
button on the side of my cell phone, I looked down the time. The bright lights
made it impossible to fully view the person who occupied the driver’s seat. It’s
probably one of the Johnson’s teenagers coming back from a party,
I
thought as I dismissed the car. Balancing my duffle bag and cup of green tea
with one hand, I pressed on the alarm button to unlock my doors. Once inside
the car, I locked the doors, tossed my duffle bag on the passenger seat, and
placed my tea in the cup holder. Looking back at our house, my eyes wavered up
to the second floor where my daughters slept in their bedroom.

            Upon arriving at the hospital parking lot, I
turned the ignition off and looked at the time on the dashboard. Sighing
softly, I adjusted my seat to a slanted angle. “Great,” I huffed out sarcastically,
“…Thirty minutes until my shift starts.”  

Scrolling through pictures of my daughters,
I watched as they transformed from infants to toddlers. One particular picture
caught my attention the most
,
my college graduation day
.

That day began with the pattering sounds of
the raindrops beating against my windowsills, snapping me out of my trance from
a sleepless night. Though a dark cast of gloom coated the crying sky, I praised
God for the beautiful day that He allowed me to wake up and see.

Did I make the right decision?
 I
truly never had time to think about it all. I wonder how life would have turned
out had I listened to Andriano. Shaking my head, I knew better than to allow my
mind to wonder about the endless possibilities of how my life could’ve ended
up. Keeping my daughters was the best decision that I could have made.

            I was startled by the sudden knocks on the door.            Each
knock pulled me away from that moment in time, as I became oriented in my
present state of being. Looking to the right, I attempted to compose myself, drawing
in calm, steady breaths. As reality settled in, I realized that I was back in
my car waiting for my shift to start. Darting my eyes to the clock on the dashboard,
a sense of relief steadied the rapture of my beating heart. A more aggressive
knock nearly shattered my window, causing my head to whip sharply to the left. My
once labored breathing had now become a battle of containment, as all of the
air nearly escaped my windpipes. Clenching my phone tightly, our eyes became
locked on each other.
What the fuck is he doing in Charlotte?
Panic
surfaced throughout my whole body, as my mind raced to my daughters.
The car
that was parked outside,
I thought at the alarming possibility.
Does he
know? Is he going to harm them? Is he going to kill me?
Fuck…think…think…think
Simone.

Looking away from him, I started to dial my
Grandmother’s phone number. He knocked again, this time a little louder, but I
ignored him as I silently prayed for my grandmother to answer the phone.

“Hello?”

            “Grandma, are you okay? Are the girls okay?”

            “Yes baby, we’re fine. Is everything okay? Did
you make it to work safely?”

“Yes, Grandma, I’m here now. Please call me
even if you have a gut feeling that something is wrong. I’ll come home right away.”

            “Of course, baby. What is this all about? Are you
okay?”

            “Yes, I’m okay. Everything is okay. I’ll see you
in the morning. Grandma, I love you.”

            “I love you too, baby. Goodnight.”

            Deciding not to take any chances, I frantically
searched for the voice record button on my cell phone. Clicking the button, the
blinking red light appeared, while my other hand reached over to unlock the
door. Before I could pull on the handle, he latched onto the outside handle and
nearly yanked the door off of the hinges. His murky grey eyes swept across my
body in an up and down motion, stopping at my thighs and slowly rising up to my
pelvis, lingering his assaulting gaze a little longer. Ashamed, at my oncoming desires
seeping through under his penetrating eyes, I shook off his effect.

            “What are you doing here?” I asked harshly.

            “You became a doctor,” he said almost as if he
was proud.
Those same lips…became familiar with each and every part of my
body,
I admitted silently.
No Simone…this is fucking Andriano. You
didn’t become a doctor because you had to choose between raising your girls and
pursuing your dreams.

            “What are you doing here?” I repeated.

            “I’m proud of you bella mia,” he commended.
Somehow, I believed him.
Yeah…just like I believed that he loved me, right?

Raising my hand up midair, my eyes cut
through the man who I once loved. “Don’t call me that.”

The smirk on his face further infuriated me as
he seemed unbothered by my look of detest. “Fuck this,” I mumbled as I started
to walk away.

            “Wait,” he said as his hand wrapped around my arm.
The tingling sensation of his fingers sent violent shivers throughout my core.
The more I fought eternally, the more he dismantled my willpower. Unable to
speak, I simply stared back at him helpless, yet intrigued of what’s to come.
Pulling me closer to him, I knew that I had to fight through this lustful spell
that he casted. Brushing his lips lightly against mine, Andriano’s eyes wavered
over my pouted lips and before leaning forward and snatching the air of defeat
from me.

Chapter Five

Andriano

Two
hours earlier

            “Good evening sir, my name is Eric. How can I be of
assistance?” asked the young concierge with a pronounced southern accent.
Moving to the side, he entered my room and stood in the middle of the penthouse
suite.

“I need a car,” I said getting straight to
the point. As much as I wanted to wait until at least daybreak, I couldn’t. I
had to see her, smell her, and feel her. Seemingly so, the last thing that took
precedence in my state of mind was the time. I just needed my
bella mia
.
And no one was going to rest until I had her…tonight.

Glancing down at his watch, Eric pulled out
his phone and scrolled through a list before asking, “Do you have any
particular preference in your choice of car? Sport? Convertible? Muscle?”

“I don’t give a fuck. I’ll drive a minivan
if I have to. I just need a car right now,” I said agitated.  

“Okay, Mr. Balducci. I will make the
arrangements,” said Eric, maintaining his composure while walking out of the
double suite doors. 

Lifting up the flap of the file, I grabbed
the front page and stuffed the paper into my pocket. An hour later, the young
concierge returned with the key fob to the 2015 Audi R8 and papers to sign. Heading
out of the hotel, I had all intentions to convince the woman that I love to
give us another chance.

After plugging her address into the GPS, I
sped down Interstate-485 and managed to arrive in front of Simone’s house
fifteen minutes earlier than the estimated arrival time. And that’s when I saw
her
…my
bella mia
. She held onto her clear duffle bag and portable cup.
Where
is she going at this time?
 Her hair was pulled back into a low ponytail,
and she wore a white uniform of some sort. I stood frozen in place when she
looked at my car.
Could she see me?
For a brief moment, I held my breath
and couldn’t decide on my next move. Latching onto the handle, I opened the
door with all intentions on kissing her fears and apprehension away. But as I
stepped out of the car, she hopped into her car. Stepping back into the car, I
watched as she pulled out of the parking spot and drove down the block.
Following suit, I shifted gears and pursued her.

When I entered the parking lot, my eyes
skimmed over the hospital lot which was practically empty. Shutting off my car
lights, I drove slowly and parked my car in a parking space that was adjacent
to her parked car.
Maybe I should have read her file,
I thought, as I
questioned if she had truly moved on. A part of her house still had lights on.
Could that have been the new man in her life? Clenching the wheel tightly,
pasty white color appeared on my knuckles, causing my skin to expand. I refused
to accept even the possibility that Simone had moved on. Finally releasing the
wheel, I opened the car door and hopped out.

As I neared her car, my heart sped up with
the anticipation to reclaiming my heart…my soul…my life. Knocking on her
window, she seemed to be lost in another world as her head spun to the
passenger side window. A sheet of anxiousness spread over me, as I pounded on
her window urgently.

Panic exploded all over her face, the moment
our eyes became in sync in a tunnel vision of only our world. Several minutes
passed by, and I refused to walk away from her car.
Not now. Not like this
.
My hand rose again to knock on her window. Hell, if I have to speak loudly in
order for her to hear me out, I would gladly do it. The moment she unlocked her
car, I quickly latched onto the door handle and tugged it open. Standing before
me, my shaft sprang to attention; pressing hard against my pants.

Her beautiful light brown eyes were clouded
by the brewing storm of lust as I stared at her. Whisked away, the desire that
encompassed her longing eyes was now filled with resistance. She was fighting
this…fighting her emotions…fighting us.
How could I blame her? After all, I
married another woman, I chose La Cosa Nostra, and I forced her to kill our baby.

Looking at her white scrubs, it suddenly
dawned on me that my
bella mia
managed to accomplish her dream in the
midst of all of my betrayal.
She’s a doctor!
Even through all the hurt I
caused her five years ago, she managed to survive and hold on tight to her
dream.

The jolt of electricity temporarily
paralyzed both of us as I tenderly grasped her shaking body and drew her near.
Capturing her lips, we mated with a heated passion that pulled me into a state
of oblivion. A purr escaped her the moment my thumb rubbed against her throat.

Pinning her body against the car, her hands
pressed against my chest as she sucked on my bottom lip. Fighting her desire,
Simone tried to push my body away while holding my tongue hostage.

Taking hold of her hands, I made the
decision for her.
You’re not going to run away from me this time
, I
thought, as I tossed her arms around my neck before deepening our kiss.

 Her eyes were filled with lust as I
captured her mouth again, this time, pressing soft and tender kisses against
her lips. Staring down at her, I knew that she could read every unspoken word
in my eyes…because I could read it in hers.

“I would never hurt you again, bella mia,” I
finally spoke.  

 “No,” she said with a heartfelt shriek. Trying
to move her body away from me, she asked, “Why the hell are you here?”  

A bustle of emotions brewed within me as I
went from love to panic, to a new level of rage. As much as I wanted to grab
both of her arms and profess my love to her, I knew that I had to be patient.
Of course, I didn’t expect her to greet me with open arms. But, I did have a smidgen
of hope that she would open her heart wide enough to at least hear me out.

“Bella mia, don’t fight me. Everything that
I did was to protect you,” I began as I hardened my stance. Stilling her moving
body, I refused to let her walk away from me.

“You should’ve protected me from yourself,”
she snapped, as she crossed her arms tightly around her chest.

“Simone, please. None of this has been easy
for me. You’ll never understand the position that I was in,” I said calmly.

“Listen, Andriano, I’m over it. I’ve moved
on with my life. Besides, I’m not the same girl from five years ago.”

“So, who are you?” I asked, bracing myself
for the truth.

“I’m not the same gullible and naïve girl
who hung onto your every word. You played me for a fool back then. Yes, I was
young and acted carelessly when it came to you. But, I’m glad that I’m no
longer blinded by your lies. With the way things ended between us, I knew that
I deserved to be with someone better. And you’re not him,” she said forwardly.  

Clenching my fists at the thought of another
man being in her life, I raged, “No other man will ever love you the way that I
love you. And I know that you’ll never be able to love another man, the way
that you loved me. I fucked up. I lied to you. But, one thing that I was always
sure about was my love for you and the lengths that I would go to protect you.”

“Bullshit! Do you really even know what love
is?” Not waiting for my response, Simone continued, “Our whole relationship was
built on your secrets and your lies. Love would’ve never told me to get an abort—”
the rest of her words died abruptly on her lips.

“Go home. Go back to your wife and the life
that you created with her. Truthfully, I feel sorry for Josephine. Even after
five years, you still think that it’s all about you.” She said, shoving my body
again. Holding back my anger, I moved away and allowed her to walk away from
me. Opening the passenger door, she gathered her things.

Pressing the button, the car alarm beeped,
signaling her locked doors.  “Go home Andriano. There’s nothing here for you,”
she spat out before she walked away from me. It took every part of me to not
reach for her and slam her body against the car. If my words couldn’t convince
her then, maybe our lovemaking could.

Looking at the love of my life walk away, I
couldn’t help but admire her strength. A rupture of guilt watered down my
admiration, as I examined this newfound strength that she developed. Every
night, for the past five years, I relived the dreadful day in the parking lot.
I chose honor over love…Josephine over her…La Costa Nostra over our baby.
Our
baby…I murdered our baby…I murdered our love.
I pushed her to get an
abortion the moment she told me that she was pregnant. I ignored the growing
voice that spoke out from my heart. Rather, I chose to act on my fears of what
would happen to her if she had my baby before I became the Don.

Protect her…protect her…protect her
,
that’s all I knew how to do. I feared nothing in life before I met Simone.
After all of the harm, the ruthlessness, and the killings…God finally sent me
my redemption. But, He also sent me my greatest fear—living without her.        

Watching her walk through the revolving
doors of the hospital, I made a promise to myself that this would be the last
time that she walked away from me, unclaimed.