Emissary (34 page)

No-one troubled themselves with him but by now the palace was in a state of frenzied activity to get the royal caravan away by nightfall, so it was easy to be ignored. He bounced into the main divan suite and found it filled with beautiful girls but none of them Ana.

‘Ana?’ he called, flapping his arms and pretending to fly around the chamber.

‘She’s not here, Pez,’ one of the girls replied.

‘Why do you bother with him?’ another admonished.

‘He understands sometimes.’ It was Sascha who was being helpful. ‘Grand Master Salmeo has sent her to her chamber to prepare.’

He didn’t respond, he simply flapped his way out of the suite and made for the upstairs sleeping apartments, where he found Ana with Elza and two of the Elim.

‘Oh not now, Pez,’ Elza sighed when she caught sight of the dwarf apparently flying in cross-eyed and burping.

Ana smiled softly at his antics in spite of her sombre mood but it didn’t hide the nasty red welt on her face. Pez noticed it instantly and it stopped his flight but he managed to keep burping through his astonishment.

‘Face, face!’ he called, ignoring the shooshing sounds of Elza. ‘Ana’s hurt just like Kett.’

It probably wasn’t the best choice of words, he realised as he watched Ana’s eyes cloud at the mention of her loyal friend. ‘Who’s hurt pretty Ana?’ he enquired gleefully of the Elim. ‘Was she screaming?’

‘Get out, dwarf!’ Elza said, exasperated, and once again the Elim came to Pez’s rescue.

‘We will report you if you speak with disrespect to him again.’

Elza grimaced. ‘He’s upsetting her.’

‘He just also made Zaradine Ana smile, perhaps you’ve forgotten.’

‘Oh, I have no time for this. How am I supposed to get a royal wife ready in such a short time?’

‘You must do the best you can,’ the elder Elim said and motioned to his companion. ‘We will wait outside for her baggage.’

‘They promised me help,’ the slave wailed to their backs.

‘The “they” you refer to intend to make it as difficult as possible, Elza,’ Ana counselled softly. ‘Did you really think they’d do much at all?’

‘They should,’ Elza said matter-of-factly. ‘You have royal status now, Zaradine Ana.’

‘And nothing’s changed for it, other than title,’ she said gently, leaning down to kiss Pez on the head. She was angry with him for not sharing the secret of Lazar’s survival with her, but it didn’t change her love towards him. ‘Are you coming with us?’

He nodded his reply, waiting for the slave
woman to step into the dressing room to choose more gowns. ‘Who did this?’ he mouthed silently, pointing to her face.

‘It doesn’t matter,’ she replied soundlessly as well. ‘I’m glad you’re coming,’ she mouthed.

Pez pursed his lips, perplexed at her evasion.

‘Ah, so you
can
be still and quiet, Pez,’ Elza said, bustling back in with a pile of silk garments in her arms. ‘Well, Zaradine Ana, at least you have no end of clothes to choose from. The Valide has been generous in this regard.’

Ana sneered. ‘I need comfortable travelling clothes. We’ll be on horseback and then camel, don’t forget. I also need clothes to stay warm with.’

‘And clothes to stay cool with,’ Elza followed up. ‘We need more time.’ She flounced back into the dressing room.

He risked a whisper. ‘Ana, quick, this is important. Did the Grand Vizier touch you at all today?’

‘Pardon?’ she grinned helplessly at what sounded a lewd question.

‘I mean it, did he at any time touch your arm or shoulder—any part of you—when he fetched you from the harem to take you to Boaz?’ His gaze flicked to the dressing chamber where he could hear Elza muttering under her breath about warm clothes. ‘Quickly please!’

Ana appeared baffled but she frowned and gave it the thought he pleaded for. After a few moments of consideration, whilst Pez felt tense to
the core watching Elza and quietly praying that Ana gave a negative answer, she nodded. ‘Yes, as I recall, he took my arm, here,’ she gestured, ‘and guided me through the gardens. He said we needed some time so we would take the longer way and then he could brief me properly.’

Pez felt his last glimpse of hope shrivel. ‘You’re quite sure?’ he pleaded again, his voice choked with disappointment.

‘Yes. I remember it clearly. Why?’

Elza appeared and their conversation came to an abrupt close with Pez falling to the floor in a swoon. He broke wind as he landed and even Elza cracked a smile. ‘He’s such a fool but it’s nice to see you looking a bit brighter. How’s that cheek?’

‘I’ll wear it with pride,’ Ana said, giving a more mischievous expression.

Elza smiled wider. ‘You’re wicked, Miss Ana. You’ll have to be extra-careful now around the Valide. She’s revealed a lot today with her action.’

Ana nodded and glanced towards Pez, who had taken all of this in and understood now who had dealt the blow, although he could hardly believe that Herezah had let her infamous control slip. There would be a reckoning, he was sure, although right now his mind was too confused to allow him any room to fret over the Valide’s actions in the future.

Ana was not the Goddess incarnate.

So who was?

Ana was invited to travel with her Zar in a special karak for two carried by ten Elim. Boaz was determined to see the caravan off himself at the edge of the city, so it was a colourful, almost festive party of dignitaries and servants who snaked down the hill from the palace by torchlight, following the Zar’s personal cavalcade. They were still celebrating their ruler’s first marriage, playing up the romance of the two virgins in their minds.

Inside the karak it was more sombre.

‘I hope I won’t let you down,’ Ana said, breaking the silence.

Boaz took her hand, and although it was dark in the karak, he stared into the eyes he knew were the colour of the sea on a winter’s evening. ‘You won’t. You know you don’t have to veil in here?’

Ana involuntarily reached for her cheek but stopped herself from touching it. ‘I know, I just think it’s respectful.’ There was not enough light to show the bruise that had developed but still she preferred Boaz to farewell her in a gentle frame of
mind, rather than one angered. It would only mean worse treatment for her once she was out of his immediate zone of protection. She felt drained and not in the mood for any more confrontation anyway. As it was, the knowledge that Lazar would be waiting for them was making her feel intensely nervous. She shivered, another involuntary action.

‘Are you all right?’

‘Of course, just thinking about what we must achieve.’

‘Fret not, they will be as enchanted as I was the first time I saw you. Use that effect you have on people, Ana, to its full devastating effect.’ She sensed rather than saw his smile.

She nodded, unsure of how to respond to this. ‘Our bargain, Boaz—’ she began but he hushed her.

‘Let’s not talk about it.’

She touched the soft bandage at his wrist. ‘Does it hurt?’

He laughed softly remembering to pull his sleeve down. ‘Not nearly as much as loving you does.’

She leaned her head on his shoulder. ‘And I do love you, but…’ Whatever she was going to say was prevented by Pez, who stuck his head in through the curtains, skipping to keep up with the moving karak. He somehow balanced a lit candle, its flame dancing insanely in time with his skipping, and throwing an unwelcome brightness into the karak.

‘Forgive me,’ he said, careful not to be overheard, and sensing he had interrupted something. ‘I just wanted you to know we’re close, my Zar.’ Pez wheeled away, braying like a donkey, but the pair were grateful for the warning, for a moment later they heard the Grand Vizier clear his throat immediately outside their karak as it rocked to a stop.

‘Yes, Tariq?’ Boaz said.

From the other side of the silks, Grand Vizier Tariq announced—a little unnecessarily now—that they had arrived.

‘Thank you. Give me a moment of privacy, please.’

‘Yes, my Zar.’

Pez had disappeared and they heard the Vizier giving orders for everyone to wait a short while.

Inside, Boaz turned again to Ana. ‘What were you about to say?’

She shook her head. It didn’t matter now.

‘Well, may I embrace my wife farewell?’

‘Seal our arrangement with a kiss?’ She laced her words with levity so it didn’t sound quite as pointed as it was. ‘I feel I have already let you down,’ she murmured.

He sighed once. ‘Ana. Just go in peace and know my heart is full. I will wait for your return and for you to be at the same peace. We shall take our marriage from there.’

He was too generous, her heart felt it might break from knowing how much pain he must be in. ‘You are easy to love. Kiss me, Boaz.’

In the dark, he lifted her veil and for the second time that day let his lips convey all the love and desire he felt for her. And Ana surprised herself by responding with equal ardour, knowing she needed to leave him something to cling to.

Gently he pulled away and smiled. ‘I’m going to remember this moment—this feeling—until you come home to me. We’ll make a son immediately.’

‘And that would make you happy?’

Even in the dark she could see the glisten of his eyes, filled with emotion. ‘It would. It would make me proud. It would secure the line.’

‘The others—’

‘Are not you,’ he interrupted firmly. ‘I want our son to sit on this throne in years to come.’

He was so intense, Ana had to look away, knowing that for all his declarations of love, for all his patience with her, his generosity, and especially for promising that any child of theirs would be safe, she felt every inch the traitor. For, as if attached to him by some invisible thread, Ana could feel the pull of Lazar. She knew he was out there with all the others, patiently awaiting their Zar’s emergence, indulging this wish for privacy but anxious to be gone. She could imagine his face—grimacing, as usual. The lines either side of his mouth, so expressive even when
he tried to hide how he was feeling, would be etched deeper, whilst his eyes would be flinty, glittering with disregard for the pomp and ceremony that now accompanied him.

None of her anger at his betrayal had dissipated but sadly her desire to be close to him was equal to that rage. Its treacherous presence seemed to mock her efforts to be immune to Lazar as well as sympathetic to Boaz, who, after all, had thrown her a lifeline. She hadn’t thought she wanted to live but one look at Lazar, at that face so filled with anguish over her, and she knew she wanted life more than death—even if it did mean a life of constant sorrow and reminders of what she had lost and what she could never have.

‘I must go,’ she said, trying to cover the awkward silence prompted by her musing.

‘Can you truly love me, Ana?’

She felt suddenly rigid with fear. Boaz was no fool and it felt as though he’d dropped in on her thoughts. ‘I just need time, Boaz. I explained that.’

‘I understand, and I’m giving you that time—I think you can appreciate that I have already demonstrated my sincerity in this regard.’

‘Your leniency, my Zar, is cherished.’

‘You must not abuse it, Ana.’

The sudden warning shocked her. She felt breathless at the cold in his voice. ‘What do you mean, Majesty?’ she faltered, falling back on formality to hide her uncertainty.

‘I mean simply this. The time I am extending you to grieve, to come to your own peace, to find it within yourself to be my wife fully, is something I have surprised myself in giving you. My father would not have offered the same to my mother, or any of his wives, no matter how much he indulged them. And he would view this as a weakness in me.’

‘Is it?’ she dared ask.

‘You know it is. Where you are concerned there
is
only one boundary to my love. Stay within it, Ana, and you will know nothing but generosity and gentleness from me.’

‘And if I cross it?’ She couldn’t be sure what they were both alluding to and yet the question rushed from her lips as though she found the threat irresistible.

‘No-one will save you from the death I would impose on you.’

This time Ana did lose her breath. There was not a mote of lightness in Boaz’s words—he meant them as gravely as he spoke of his intense love for her. He was frightening in his black-and-white view of life. For all his intelligence and empathy, he viewed her with no shades of grey.

‘What is that boundary, my Zar?’

He did not hesitate. ‘Fidelity. Stay true to me and you will never come to any harm again.’

‘You couldn’t save me from your mother,’ she risked.

‘This I regret. I am aware of what happened today in the harem. Pez has informed me.’

Her alarm was obvious. ‘Pez had no right—’

‘Pez has every right. He and I were friends before he met you—we are lifelong friends. He is loyal to me and to you, Ana. He told me in order to protect you. Unfortunately the news reached me after I’d already had a rather stern talk with my mother.’

‘She came to see you?’

‘After the incident, no doubt hoping to cover her tracks. I’ve never seen my mother openly lose her temper—you must have said something truly fiery to provoke her. She will never dare strike you again.’

‘I claimed we were equals.’

‘On this journey, Ana, you may even bear a higher status in the minds of those you meet. This does not trouble me. As far as the palace generally is concerned, Zaradine and Valide are equal, perhaps my wife enjoying slightly more indulgence. Unfortunately, as far as the harem is concerned, the Valide has superiority. I cannot help this.’

‘But you can change it.’

‘Over years, perhaps yes. Not by the time you come back to me, however.’

She knew there was no point in arguing this. Boaz was right. And then she considered all that had changed for them. Hadn’t they both had to grow up these last few moons? Boaz was already acting every inch the powerful Zar and her
behaviour in the harem today had surely shocked the witnesses. Even their odd bargain showed a new maturity—she must live up to her promise to her husband now.

‘I will cope, my Zar. I will be a good Zaradine.’

‘No Zaradine, to my knowledge, has ever left the sanctuary of the harem.’ Again it sounded like a warning and she felt the spike of tension between them.

‘These are no ordinary circumstances or neither would I,’ she responded with equal care.

‘There will be temptation, Ana. You need to heed what I have said.’ He was treading softly, she could see this, and yet he was determined to make a point.

Ana decided to be direct for him. ‘I will not try to escape, my Zar.’

‘I think we shall have to let history show us your faith here, Ana. Your track record suggests otherwise, but that’s not what I’m referring to.’

‘You refer to my faithfulness,’ she murmured.

‘Yes. Temptation will present itself.’

Ana was already tired and her fatigue got the better of her. She became impatient with the innuendo that felt suddenly sinister. ‘Who exactly do you think I might feel tempted by, Highness? The Grand Vizier perhaps, one of the Galinsean dignitaries, or do you already suspect me of garnering attention from one of your mutes?’ Even she could hear the edge in her voice, and regretted it.

He shrugged away her sarcasm. ‘I hope you’ll never take that tone publicly,’ he said, voice soft but firm.

‘Forgive me. Dawn brought me a drowning and dusk has closed on a marriage. By this coming dawn we begin a journey to a new realm, into a lot of uncertainty, and the avoidance of a war depends on my ability to charm our centuries-old rivals. These hours I’ve lived through have been daunting and I’m feeling a little weary, my Zar, and I humbly apologise.’

It was well phrased with just enough emotion driving it that he could feel her own sense of the unreal. He touched her bruised cheek affectionately. ‘I don’t think any of us have given sufficient credit for what you’ve had to live through today.’

She wanted to shake away his hand but resisted, yet she remained determined to finalise this conversation with its darker undercurrent. ‘Who do you keep referring to, my Zar, as being a threat to my fidelity? Please be honest with me.’

She saw the pain reflected in his eyes when he uttered the name. ‘I refer to Spur Lazar.’

Ana felt dizzied, wondering again if her husband could listen to her thoughts. ‘I…’ she stammered, flustered.

Mercifully he read her discomfort differently. ‘Don’t fret, Ana. I know that you have done nothing to win any other man’s admiration. All I’m suggesting is that other people seem to think
Lazar regards you with something other than innocent care.’

‘Do you believe this?’

‘I don’t know what I think, Ana,’ and now he sounded plaintive, vulnerable. ‘I’m besotted with you, that makes me jealous of any man, including the Grand Vizier, who will share any time with you.’

‘Boaz,’ she began, talking to him like a wife now, ‘I live in the harem. The only men I meet are half-men, and then of course there’s Pez. The man who spends most time with me is Salmeo and the Grand Master Eunuch is so repulsive to me that I would rather make love to a monkey from your zoo than with him.’ At this Boaz barked an embarrassed laugh but allowed her to continue. ‘The first time I’ve set eyes on the Spur in a year was today and that’s because he rescued me from my watery grave. You must also remember I have thought him dead for all of this time. There has been neither opportunity nor desire on either of our parts and so I believe this warning is troublemaking, designed to make you feel unsure of me, of yourself, of the one man who is truly loyal to
you
—not your father, not Percheron, not because he has some other agenda. Lazar is loyal to you. This rumour-mongering can only have come from one source. One jealous source always looking to stir trouble. I’m presuming your caution springs from something your mother has said. Would I be right?’

‘And my own good sense that any red-blooded man would find you irresistible.’

Relief flooded Ana’s body that his suspicions were truly borne from jealousy and hearsay rather than looking into her soul somehow. ‘Well, on the occasions I have been with Spur Lazar, both publicly and privately, he has acted towards me with the usual disdain he bestows on most. In fact I recall asking him why he disliked me so much. Spur Lazar has never let his gaze linger on me,’ she lied, feeling her face flush, ‘and he has certainly never laid so much as a finger on me.’ She was breathing hard, hoping a sense of indignation might cover her attempt at deception. Once again she blessed her luck that it was so dark.

‘We shall never speak of this again,’ he said, accepting her response and her right to be vexed. ‘You’re right, the Valide can provoke problems where none exist. It is her way—her method of survival from years of cunning in the harem.’

‘And her own infatuation with the Spur,’ Ana added.

He sighed. ‘Yes, there is that too. Nevertheless, Ana, let me end this conversation by saying we are not discussing Spur Lazar or my mother but we are discussing you. It is you who is being cautioned. It is your actions that will be watched and no doubt tested.’

‘I understand,’ she replied, not even sure she could look at Lazar in the next few moments
without revealing to both him and the Zar how treacherous her body’s inclinations truly were. She wanted to tell Boaz now that her mind was willing but her heart was a traitor, that her desire to be dutiful could not match her body’s desire simply to feel the touch of his Spur’s skin against hers again. However fleeting it was, she knew her body would risk the danger, risk the Zar’s wrath, even if her good sense told her otherwise, and still it reminded her constantly that Lazar had betrayed her.