Was that why he hired someone so clearly his type?
“I’m sure it’s fine,” she restated.
Unfortunately I didn’t feel any better about things after I hung up the phone. I found Zoe and Jonathan in my office as she conducted his studies for the day. “Mrs. Fullerton,” Zoe greeted with her sunny smile. “Feeling better today?”
“Somewhat,” I answered as I glanced over at Jonathan. He had his nose buried in a book about famous art. “What are you studying today?” I asked.
“Contemporary art,” he answered with a big grin. “Zoe’s going to take me to an art gallery this afternoon.”
“I always like to have my students study before we go on field trips,” Zoe explained. “They get more out of it.”
“Agreed,” was my terse reply.
“You look a little pale,” she said. “You should go lie down. I have all this covered.”
As much as I hated it, I knew I needed to go lie down. Normally I’d dig my heels in and establish my turf. But I had not one but two tiny babies who needed me to take care of myself, so I was forced out of my office and virtually out of much of Jonathan’s studies.
I felt horrible all the way up the stairs and the long walk to my room. Cleo brought me a light snack, apparently at the behest of the newest Fullerton miracle worker, Zoe.
My troubled eyes met hers.
“Should I be worried, Cleo?”
Cleo gave me a reassuring smile. “Mr. Fullerton loves you, Rachel. Trust in that and you never have any reason at all to fear.”
“How do you know?”
“Know what?”
“That he loves me. He’d never say, not to where I could hear it.”
She shrugged. “How does anyone know? A person can say the words without meaning them, and live a life of love without saying them. At one point you just have to believe.”
I nodded as I rested against the fluffy pillows.
“You rest,” she instructed with a firm wag of her finger. “We’ve got it from here. You’re the one with important work to do, nurturing those wee ones so they can develop into strong, healthy Fullertons.”
I nodded and watched her leave.
I curled up in a ball and fought the losing battle with sleep.
I knew as soon as my eyes closed, I would dream about going into labor with twins, fearful and alone, as all three of my Fullerton men walked away from me and toward a svelte blonde beauty named Zoe.
To celebrate Spring Break, the Gilbert clan once again descended on Los Angeles. This time they were flown on Drew’s private jet and arrived to our estate in a limousine. I could see how star-struck the kids were as they climbed out of the sleek, black car. Nancy was even more so. I threw my arms around her with a grateful squeeze. Of all the things I now had in my life, a best friend I could simply hang out with was noticeably missing.
As I walked into the foyer on her arm, I saw my home through her eyes. My talkative friend was struck mute by the opulence I had already begun to take for granted. I could see Jonathan was experiencing many of those same feelings as he watched Becca’s face light up with wonder as we explored room to room.
Drew was at the office when my friends arrived, but Cleo had prepared a nice lunch on the terrace. Our spectacular Beverly Hills weather was mild and temperate. I teased that the city council had voted on it. The kids squirmed in their seats as they waited for the opportunity to jump into the sparkling blue pool
. Zoe offered to tend to all the kids that afternoon so that Nancy and I could walk down to the Greystone Manor and Museum. I was almost grateful to leave her to it, just so I could get quality time alone with my friend.
We halfway down the driveway to the gate when Nancy quipped, “She’s a helpful little thing, isn’t she?”
I shrugged. “Drew thought we might need some help now that we know we have twins on the way. I can’t say he was wrong.”
“The more, the merrier I suppose.”
She shut up, which was uncharacteristic for her. “And?”
“And nothing,” she dismissed easily.
“You always were a rotten liar.”
“He certainly is fond of a particular type, isn’t he?
First Elise. Then Olivia. Now Zoe.”
I shrugged. “About sixty percent of L.A. is blonde and thin.”
“And young. And Swedish.”
“Swiss,” I corrected.
“Pardon me.” She sighed as she wound her arm in mind. “I guess it doesn’t matter anyway. After all, he married you. You’re the one with the house the size of Rhode Island, and a diamond on your finger to match.” I laughed. “When it’s all said and done, he’ll always come home to you. He has too much to lose otherwise.”
“Aw, what a happily ever after you paint, Nance. You should write fairy tales.”
“You’re the one living the dream, baby.” She shrugged. “He’s a man, and men are all the same. They like to surround themselves with beautiful women. It makes them feel like gods.”
I smirked. I already knew how much that appealed to Drew.
“Keep him tired and happy and you have nothing to worry about,” she advised.
We lingered so long that Drew had already come home by the time we returned. He had all the kids wrapped around his little finger as they played in the pool. I knew from the breath that Nancy sucked in when she saw him that he looked as devastating dripping wet in his clinging swim trunks as he did in a three piece suit.
All I could see was the glistening blonde in the two-piece bikini. Nancy squeezed my arm as we walked down onto the lawn.
Later that night, the kids all headed to the media room
to watch a screener copy of a movie that had yet been released. Zoe kept an eye on them while the adults enjoyed some wine and conversation on the terrace in front of the roaring outdoor fireplace. If I had worried that Greg and Drew wouldn’t be able to connect, those fears were quickly assuaged. Drew surprisingly knew a lot about football, and even confessed that he had played some in college. I knew that he had earned an instant fan in Greg.
Each day that followed contained the same happy chaos. By Thursday, after Jonathan’s tenacious, week-long campaign, Drew even relented to another campout at the ranch with Alex. This time I shared a tent with Drew, which left me feeling even more unsettled. Worse, as the night wore on it became increasingly clear that Zoe didn’t have eyes for my husband at all. She was completely and utterly smitten with the guitar-playing pseudo-country boy, Alex Fullerton.
It was evident in the way she looked at him, like he was a rock star on the stage. What wasn’t completely clear was how he might have felt about this newfound interest, or even if he was aware of it at all. He was typically Alex, hidden behind a smirk and knowing eyes that saw everything but gave nothing away.
He was far more interested in the way Drew planted himself at my side, determined to mark his territory. His hooded eyes watched as Drew pulled me away for an early night in our private tent. I cuddled into the sleeping bag as Drew zipped the flap closed behind us.
“This is more like it,” he murmured as he slipped in beside me. His kisses were hungry but all I could think about was the last time we were here together on this ranch, and how different things were. “What’s wrong?” he asked as his hand slid lower to slip under my shirt.
“It’s awkward,” I admitted softly.
His hand stalled. “Because of Alex?”
“Yes,” I answered.
He propped himself on one elbow. “Funny. You didn’t find it awkward last time we were here and he shared that tent with you.”
“He didn’t share the tent with me,” I corrected. “And yes, I did find it awkward. None of this has been easy for me, Drew. I’m not Elise.”
He sighed. “I suppose you’re right,” he admitted. His hand eased down to cup my growing tummy. “Besides, having sex on the hard ground probably isn’t the best thing for our babies.” He mulled that statement over for a long moment. “Our babies,” he repeated. “All those nights I stayed in tents like this one, in front of fires like that one, under these very same stars, I never would have known this was what the future had in store.” His eyes met mine. “The road has been rocky, but I’m not sorry.”
I placed my hand on his. He bent for another kiss before cuddling me to his chest as we fell asleep.
The next day we spent riding the horses. I fell in love with A True Southern Princess, the chestnut filly that was the most recent addition to our stables. I couldn’t wait to ride her once the babies were born. Zoe took my place instead, however since she had never ridden she depended heavily on Alex’s patient instruction. I kept sneaking peeks to figure out if he returned any interest toward the blonde beauty, and ended up catching Drew do the same.
His jaw clenched as he watched the interaction between his brother and his au pair, assessing all the data behind those cold, hard eyes. I found his interest much more upsetting than anything Alex might have done. Warning bells went off in my brain. The last thing these embattled brothers needed was one more toy to fight over.
I was counting the minutes until we could leave. Unfortunately, Elise was due to pick Jonathan up by six that evening, so we had to stay all day. Millicent prepared our lunch. I tried to help but Zoe shooed me away so that I could put my feet up and rest. Those were two things I found impossible to do. Drew, Alex and Greg decided to play pool, so I joined them in the game room. Drew and Alex prowled around the pool table like cheetahs sizing each other up, and the game stayed tied to the bitter end. I wanted to play and beat both of them, but Zoe came for me to let me know that Elise had arrived early and wanted to take Jonathan.
I didn’t bother Drew as I followed Zoe to the foyer. I nodded to dismiss our young nanny before I turned to Elise. “A little early, aren’t you?”
“I was in the neighborhood,” she purred. She glanced off in the direction where Zoe had disappeared. “That didn’t take long.”
I sighed. “For your information, we’re having twins. Drew simply hired some extra help.”
She snickered to herself. “You don’t see it yet, but that’s okay,” she said. “Every Fullerton wife finds it out the hard way.” She glanced me up and down. “And yes, I heard about your bountiful womb. Congratulations. Now maybe you can convince Drew to let Jonathan come live with me.”
“I’m going to let the courts decide that,” I said.
She gave me another once-over. “Suit yourself. Tell Jonathan I’ll be out in the car.” She turned to leave, but then turned back. “You know, I knew you’d never last, but I thought at least he’d let you have your babies first. Maybe he’s figured out with you he can have his Swiss cake and eat it too.”
She spun on her heel in a dramatic whoosh of her designer clothes, and stalked loudly across the hard floor.
I met Drew as I headed back toward the family room. “Elise is here early. She wants to take Jonathan.”
His lipped thinned into a hard line. “I should make her wait,” he grumbled. “But I suppose the sooner she leaves, the quicker we can.”
I watched as he walked over to Zoe to issue his new instructions. I studied them carefully, to see any hint of anything I’d ever seen with me. I was so focused I never heard Nancy walk up beside me. “You’re going to make yourself crazy.”
“You started it,” I pointed out.
“What do I know?” she asked. “And when have you ever taken my advice when it came to men anyway?”
I nodded. “I’ll give you that one.”
Alex passed Drew and Zoe, and Zoe stared after him. “Honestly, I think you have more to worry about with Alex.”
“Alex isn’t mine,” I reminded softly.
“Isn’t he?” she returned, softer still.
We let the subject drop as we corralled the troops to head back to Los Angeles. Alex gave everyone a warm hug in parting, except for his brother of course. I was more interested in the hug he shared with Zoe. Although it was awkward, I could see by the look in her face she was
already falling for my compelling brother-in-law.
I inwardly cringed every time I thought about him in those terms. He was family, but he didn’t feel like family. It felt deeper than that, and I was beginning to suspect it always would.
If it hadn’t been for the way Jonathan was thriving from each family interaction, I probably would have resigned myself to never seeing him again, just to make it easier.
Instead we parted with an equally awkward hug and I returned to the Fullerton estate in Beverly Hills.
By the time Jonathan returned home Sunday evening, our guests had already been flown back to Texas via private jet. He was pouty as a result, given he had missed time with his favorite girl, Becca. Theirs was an innocent courtship, sharing emails over a thousand miles to discuss whatever eleven-year-olds couldn’t wait to discuss. They were friends of a most special kind, with nothing but chaste kisses to crown them as “going together.”
I made sure I took lots of photos so that I could present him a scrapbook for Christmas, since my last gift of a framed photo of them had gone over so well.
As it turned out, however, Jonathan was pouting more over his mother’s love life than his own. Aazim had turned into a regular fixture in Elise’s life, particularly on the weekends. He had no cultural aversion to her flashy personality and her materialistic goals, and in fact wore her proudly on his arm as he schmoozed with the Los Angeles elite. He fit in well, given his experience with TruNews and Jasper Carrington. He liked the finer things in life, and had decided that Elise was one of them.
“I don’t like him,” Jonathan told me the next day. “He’s all about the money. He’d probably roll his cigarettes in dollar bills if he thought he could get away with it.”
I laughed. “You’re starting to sound like Alex.”
“Good,” he replied.
“What about Alex?” Zoe wanted to know as she entered our home office.
“Just saying he’s awesome,” Jonathan answered easily.
She smiled softly. “Yes, he certainly is. You’re very lucky to have him as an uncle,” she said as she mussed Jonathan’s hair like I always used to do. Zoe glanced at me. “I can take over here if you’d like to go lie down.”
Inwardly I seethed. I wasn’t used to other people doing the things I was supposed to do, and I certainly wasn’t used to people forcing me away when I still felt like doing them. “That’s okay, Zoe. I’m feeling much better today. I’ve got Jonathan’s studies.”
Her eyes were uncertain as she stared at me. “Okay,” she finally relented. “I’ll just go see if I can help Cleo.”
After she left, Jonathan glanced at me uncertainly. “Don’t you like Zoe
, Mom?”
“I like her just fine,” I muttered. “I just don’t like to be treated like an invalid.”
“She’s just trying to help,” he reasoned. “Pretty soon we’re going to have our hands full around here. Dad was just thinking ahead.”
“Well, we’re not there yet. And I can handle taking care of things until we are.”
He nodded and returned to his work, while my mind raced to find footing, once again, in this melodrama in which I’d been cast.
I was almost sorry I sent Zoe away and refused that nap.
I probably could have used one.