Epilogue: The Dark Duet (24 page)

After go-karts, we ate pizza and played
video games in the arcade upstairs. Livvie was no match for me when it came to
shooting games, and I think we spent close to thirty Euros pumping change into
a game called
Area 51.
If the earth
is ever attacked by aliens, you’re welcome to stand behind me.

By early evening, we were just
finishing up eighteen holes of glow-in-the-dark mini golf. I was having one of
the best days of my life and was spending it with the best person in my life. I
couldn’t wait to get Livvie home and express my gratitude to her for being
everything I needed and far more than I deserved.

“You can’t do that, Pet. You’re
cheating.” I glared at Livvie as she picked up her ball and reset it on the
mat.

“You distracted me. I should get to try
again. It’s the last hole.” She stuck her tongue out.

“I distracted you while I was standing here
being quiet?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll let you try again if you tell me
you love me.” I smiled my most wicked smile. The one I liked to give her just
before I stripped her down and had my filthy way.

“You first,” she said with a grin. She
hit the ball and it rolled part way up the green before it failed to make it
over the ice cream hill and rolled back toward her.

I laughed.

“That’s what you get.” Livvie kept
hitting her ball until she made it into the hole. She was a sore winner and a
very quiet loser.

“Are you hungry?” she asked as we were
leaving.

“Not really. We’ve had a lot of junk.”
I hit the unlock button to the BMW.

“Well, just say you’re hungry so I can
suggest a place for dinner.” She grinned.

“I’m starving!” I said.

“Me too! Luckily, I know of this new
Italian place that opened up. We should go there.”

I opened the door for Livvie and she
gave me a kiss on the cheek before she got inside. I slid behind the wheel, and
as I put the vehicle in gear to leave the parking lot, Livvie’s hand was
already on my thigh. She explained where to go while her fingers gently stroked
me.

“Thank you, Kitten,” I whispered.

“You’re welcome, Sexy. Are you enjoying
your birthday?”

“Immensely. I think tomorrow I’m going
to try and find that arcade game.” Retirement had opened me up to new hobbies.
I discovered I really like video games.

“Men,” Livvie scoffed. “You better not
start ignoring me.” She was pouting, but her heart wasn’t in it.

“You’re the one who encouraged me to
get a PlayStation. I’m not the only bad influence in this vehicle.” I casually
put my hand on top of hers and held it the twenty minutes it took to get to the
restaurant. When we arrived, I realized Livvie had lied to me about spending
the entire day alone. Claudia and Rubio were already waiting to be seated. They
held bags in their hands.

Claudia appeared giddy, and after
hugging Livvie, she tossed herself at me.

“Happy birthday!” She planted a kiss on
each of my cheeks. I begrudgingly returned the embrace and the kisses. Claudia
is a good friend, and though I hate to admit it, I’d do most anything for her
and Rubio.

Rubio shook my hand and wished me a
happy birthday. He was wearing a pink shirt with grey pinstripes beneath a dark
grey sweater and black slacks. It wasn’t bad actually—for a moment he had me
contemplating pink. Then I realized the shade matched the summer dress Claudia
was wearing and I scrapped the idea. Livvie and I will never wear matching
outfits. No!

“There is a fair in town. Claudia and I
are going after dinner. You’re welcome to come with us if you don’t have other
plans,” Rubio said on the way to our table.

I looked ahead at Livvie, who was busy
gabbing with Claudia about beating me at go-kart racing. She conveniently
didn’t supply the results of our shooting spree or mini-golf tournament. I
smirked.

“We’ll probably head home after dinner.
I have one last gift waiting for me and I’m eager to open it.”

Rubio blushed.

“I… yeah, ok.” I nudged him with my
shoulder and we laughed. 

We ordered appetizers and salad since
no one was particularly hungry. The restaurant was quaint and quiet. Most
likely it was owned and operated by a single family. The food tasted homemade
and was delicious. I almost wished I hadn’t eaten so much pizza earlier, but it
was difficult to regret any part of the day I’d had.

“Is it time for gifts? I’m so excited!”
Claudia clapped her hands.

“I had to buy her that dress earlier.
She always wants a present when someone else is getting one.” Rubio laughed and
kissed Claudia’s bare shoulder. She didn’t have the decency to look embarrassed
and I found myself enjoying that aspect of her personality the best. With
Claudia, what you saw was the truth. It’s more than I could say about most.

“Do you want to open presents?” Livvie
asked. She wriggled her eyebrows at me.

“I
suppose
.” I feigned disinterest.

Claudia shoved her gift toward me
first. It was a slender box and weighed practically nothing, but Claudia was
nearly bursting with held laughter and excitement. I was instantly suspicious.
Especially when she said to Livvie, “You have to make him wear it.”

I tore away the paper and lifted the
lid off of the box. I stared and stared and stared some more.

“What the hell
is
this?” I laughed. I shook the box and two plastic eyes wiggled
around.

“Take it out,” Livvie suggested. She
had her hand over her mouth to hide her grin.

I obliged the group and regretted it. I
had to smile though. It was funny and just the right touch of embarrassing. It
was underwear.

“I assume I’m supposed to put my um… in
the trunk of the elephant? Very clever. Rubio, do you also have a pair?” I
tossed them onto his lap and he picked them up between thumb and forefinger. He
slung them back at me.

“Sorry, friend. I don’t do animal
prints.” We all laughed.

I received a new video game featuring
the Mario Brothers from Rubio. I didn’t know much about the game at the time,
but let me assure you that many a day has been spent acquainting myself with
the famous plumbers since.

“I’ll be right back,” Livvie said as
she stood. “Claudia has my present for you. Open it.” She kissed me and walked
away before I could ask where she was going.

The box from Livvie was large and I
ripped into it. I laughed hard when I saw the contents. Claudia was out of her
seat and hovering over my shoulder. Rubio stayed in his seat but was trying to
peer into the box. There was a piece of paper that read: Sexy’s Kung-fu Boo-Boo
Kit. Inside were rolls of bandages, band-aids, butterfly stiches, a bottle of
peroxide, bath salts, a hand-made massage coupon entitling me to a “full body
rub down (with happy ending)”, and hand wraps “specifically designed for boxers.”

I still had a smile on that could crack
my face when the singing started. I looked up from my box and Livvie was
walking toward me. The restaurant staff was carrying an entire tray of cupcakes
with candles in them. They sang:

Happy
birthday to you.

Happy
birthday to you.

Happy
birthday dear, James.

Happy
birthday to you.

I stood up and reached for Livvie. She
kissed me and whispered in my ear.

“One cupcake for every birthday, my love,
and one more for good luck.”

I couldn’t stop staring at her as she
pulled away.
I love you
, I wanted to
say, but my throat felt closed and I was afraid of what would come out. There
were tears in her eyes, and if I’d been a weaker man, there would have been
tears in mine.

“What are you waiting for, the building
to burn down?” Claudia chided. “Blow them out!”

I smiled, though I felt on the verge of
falling apart. I kissed Livvie on her forehead and let my lips linger long
enough for her to feel the depth of my appreciation. Then, for the first time I
could remember, I blew out my birthday candles.

“Tell me how you feel.” I ran the
leather tongue of the riding crop along Livvie’s outstretched arm. I watched as
she shivered. The tiny hairs on her arm stood on end.

Livvie opened her mouth to speak,
stopped, swallowed, and then replied.

“Excited,” she said. She shivered again
and the leather straps that held her in place on the cross creaked. There
wouldn’t be any kicking or flailing to interrupt me this time.

“Was that your first thought? I don’t
think it was.” I continued down her arm and over her shoulder. I knew she liked
it when I kissed her down her spine. I let the crop caress her where my lips
typically would.

We hadn’t done this before, not as
lovers. I had my doubts about doing it at all, but she insisted. Her book was
nearly finished. She’d been working on it more aggressively in the weeks
leading up to her request. Between Livvie’s writing, work, and school schedule,
I’d hardly spent any time with her since my birthday. She needed this, she
said. She needed to remember how it felt. She needed to recreate it.

I didn’t want her to remember.
I
didn’t want to remember. Yet, there I
was, crop in hand. It was a pull too compelling to resist. I wouldn’t use the
belt. I wouldn’t leave the marks I’d left the first time. If Livvie could
re-imagine the events of our past, I could too. I could give her pain
and
pleasure. I could finally let the
fading ghost of our past die and rest in peace. It was time for us to go on
living.

I tapped her gently on her flank. She
jumped.

“I asked you a question. Was excited
your first response?”

“No,” she whispered. “I’m… I’m afraid.”

Yes, she was afraid. I’d learned her
fear very well. In fact, I consider myself a connoisseur of fear. I know there
are as many varieties of fear as there are colors in a rainbow. Livvie
was
afraid, but it was a brand of fear I
very much enjoyed.

“Fear is part of it.” I slapped at her
inner thighs gently. I liked the sound it made. “You’re defenseless. You’re
vulnerable. You’re completely at my mercy.” I stood behind her, unmoving, and I
smelled her fear. True to her word, there was excitement as well. I leaned in
and kissed the shell of her ear. “You. Are.
Mine.
Say it for me.”

She sagged in her bonds. Her head fell
on my shoulder and she nuzzled against me.

“I’m yours, Caleb.” I was always Caleb
while she was vulnerable. My name on her tongue reminded me of slipping into a
worn pair of shoes. I’d been called Caleb most of my life, and were it not for
Livvie, the name would be lost to me. Caleb had done horrible things—he’d been
a monster—but he’d also allowed James to survive. Caleb deserved to live. I
could be both men. I
am
both men.

I stepped back and took in the sight in
front of me piece by piece. Her long mane of ebony hair cascaded down her
slender back. I couldn’t wait to hold it as I fucked her. I’d put her in red
satin. Every miniscule movement caused the red fabric to shift and offer a
different tantalizing bit of skin. The panties were scant. The meaty flesh of
her backside appeared plumper by way of the cut. With her legs spread open on
the X-shaped cross, I could catch glimpses of her pussy when she tried to
adjust. Thick black straps made of leather held her in place at wrists and
ankles.

My heart raced at the thought of
whipping her. There was the hum of guilt living within me, but my baser urges
banged like a drum in my veins. She was mine. She’d given herself to me, and I
would take possession of her as surely as she had taken possession of my
battered soul. The void in me had been filled by her love and forgiveness. All
that she asked was that I give her all I had in me to give: my heart, my soul,
my love, my secrets, my loyalty, and my whip hand.

I took her quickly and unaware across
the bottom of her ass. Livvie’s scream rent the air. James flinched at the
sound, but Caleb’s blood sang. I
am
both men.

Livvie’s scream died just as suddenly
as it had been born. Her lips were pressed together. Her hands were fisted
above the leather straps holding her in place. A red stripe decorated her
hindquarters.

“Tell me how you feel,” I grated. I ran
a hand along her quivering backside. I could already feel the welt.

“I…”Livvie croaked. “I don’t know.”

“Do you want me to continue?” I already
knew the answer. I wanted her to know it too.

“Yes, Caleb.” There was confidence in
her voice.

“Anything for you, Pet.” I did show
mercy. I caressed her behind with my hand until I felt her muscles relax into
my touch. “Let’s start with more familiar ground.” I raised my hand and slammed
it forward. I hit one cheek first and then the other in rapid succession. I
wanted her nice and warm before I used the crop again.

If Livvie could have moved, she’d have
been up on her toes. I’d spanked her harder and not encountered quite so much
movement, but it was my belief that restraints often invited slaves to thrash
to their hearts’ content. I had to remind myself Livvie had only ever played at
the part of slave. She was mine of her own free will.