Euphoria (3 page)

“I’m gonna take a shower, Angel, then get some rest. I’m fucking exhausted and I’m in an awful mood.”

“We need to talk Mase,” she answered meekly.

Running my hands through my grown out hair, I sighed loudly. “I know we do, Scarlett. Apparently I’m gonna have a lot of free time in the next few months to talk, so we can do it later. Okay?”

She took a deep breath, and I could see her trying to muster up the courage for whatever she was about to say. “No, it’s not okay. You’re not
okay
, and you aren’t
fine
. You need help. I’m not gonna sit around and watch you destroy yourself. Things will never same between us, Mase. We can never go back to where we were, but I’m not gonna turn my back on you when you need someone to love and support you. I’m sorry for what I did to you… to us.” She paused and looked down at the ground for a moment, shame washing over her face. Raising her chestnut eyes back to mine, she continued, “I won’t fail you. I promise I won’t let you fall again.”

SCARLETT

Once Mason had showered and fallen asleep, I grabbed a room key and quietly let myself out the door, heading back to the tattoo shop I had sat in front of the previous day. An hour and a half later, I was walking back to the hotel smiling for the first time since I had landed in Miami. I absolutely loved my new ink ~ a permanent reminder that I needed to fly with my own wings, that I could never truly be happy until I learned to love myself for being just me. I still had a long way to go to get to that point, but I had finally realized that not Ash, Mason, nor Max… no anyone else could do that for me.

Mason was still asleep when I returned to the hotel room, in the exact position that I had left him in. Sitting next to him on the bed, I gently stroked my fingers across his cheek. He looked so vulnerable in that moment, any negative thought that I had ever had about him, was washed away as the love I still had for him flowed freely. I was so worried about him; I knew that he should’ve stayed in the hospital one more night, but damn if he wasn’t the most stubborn person I had ever met. I could only hope that he would seriously try to get help and get his life cleaned up. I would do everything in my power to make sure that that happened. I just wasn’t sure how Ash was going to feel about it…

Completely exhausted myself from the events of the previous twenty four hours, I moved to the other side of the bed and lied down next to him. My shoulder was a little tender from the tattoo, but I wasn’t awake long enough to care. Seconds after my head hit the pillow, sleep consumed me.

I had no idea what time it was when I woke up. The room was dark and there was no sunlight shining through the window; the only way I could see anything was from the faint glow of the streetlights outside. Despite my lack of vision, my sense of touch was definitely working, and there was no doubt that kisses were being peppered on the inside of my thigh, moving right up to the most sensitive spot on my body.

CHAPTER THREE

Come Home ~ One Republic

Chasing Pavements ~ Adele

ASH

The day after Christmas was always one of my favorite days of the year ~ that was until that year. I woke up with a pounding headache, a stomach begging to be purged, and the worst case of cotton mouth ever, but none of those things compared to the awful empty feeling I had inside ever since Scarlett had left the day before. The attempt to drink my woes away at Nicholas’ house only led to more problems as the girl from the night of Evie’s funeral attempted to seduce me in the kitchen. Thankfully Jess walked in just at that time to save me. And by save me, I mean she kicked the girl out and told her she wasn’t welcome at the house ever again. There was no way in hell that I would’ve touched her, or anyone else for that matter, regardless of how much I had to drink, but Jess taking care of it for me made it much less awkward.

I stumbled into the bathroom and stared at my reflection. I looked nearly as bad as I felt with dark circles under my eyes and stringy, oily hair plastered to my face. After brushing my teeth, I took a long shower trying to wash the funk off, but that unsettling feeling still sat heavy in my stomach even after I was clean and dressed. I didn’t want to spend the day moping around the house thinking about what she was doing, so I called Max to see if he had plans.

An hour later, as I sat playing Xbox with him, I realized that hanging out at the apartment he shared with Scarlett wasn’t doing much to help me not think about her. Everywhere I looked I saw something of hers, and it took everything in me not to go lay in her bed just to feel closer to her. I was losing my mind wondering what was going on in Miami, and if I was honest with myself, I knew that I was petrified that I was going to lose her to him again. I hadn’t heard from her since her plane landed the previous night, and I had refrained from calling to get a status update. And by status update, I meant when she was coming home... as long as Rat was simply alive, I could really care a less about his ass.

The longer I sat there, the more that stomach-turning feeling of something not being right continued to eat at me. I knew it wasn’t just the remnants of the hangover, it was a real gut check. Abruptly, I dropped the controller on the couch next to me and jumped up.

“I’m going to get her,” I blurted out.

“What? What do you mean?” Max asked, looking up at me like I had lost my mind.

“I’m not going to let him weasel his way back in. I finally got her back, and I’ll be damned if I lose her again,” I explained. “I’m going to claim what’s mine.”

“Well, I’m going with you then,” he replied as he stood up next to me. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

I didn’t answer him because honestly, I had a bad feeling about it too. Instead I waited silently as he threw some clothes in a duffel bag and checked the apartment to make sure all the lights and electronics were off. We stopped off at my house for me to do the same before heading off to the airport. Once we got there, I realized that I had no idea when the next flight was or anything else. It took a little bit of time for us to get the tickets purchased, and then even longer to wait for our flight, but finally at six thirty in the evening, we were airborne and I was on my way to get my butterfly.

It was late on the east coast when our plane touched down, and I was completely exhausted by the time we got to the hotel. I decided to wait until the morning to call Scarlett in case she was already in bed. I assumed she was most likely drained, both physically and emotionally, from the events over the past few days, Plus, I had no idea what hotel she was even in.

That night I got the worst sleep ever. I tossed and turned with visions of Scarlett and Mason together running on loop through my mind. I had never been so happy to hear the alarm clock go off at seven o’clock. I knew it was early, but I couldn’t wait another minute to hear her voice. I grabbed my phone and hit the first name listed in my favorites.

“Hello?” a sleepy male voice answered.

With that one word, my world came crashing down around me as I realized that my worst fears had come true.

SCARLETT

“Scarlett, wake up,” I heard Mason’s voice say as he shook my shoulder. “Scarlett… Scarlett, get up now. Ash just called your phone.”

Hearing Ash’s name, I sat up instantly and looked around trying to get my bearings. I realized I was on the couch in the living area of the hotel suite, and the events of the previous evening flooded my memory.

Waking up to kisses on my inner thigh, I moaned slightly and leaned my head back in to the pillow. My legs instinctively had spread open to make room for him to settle between my thighs, and within seconds my body was aching in anticipation for his mouth to land on my mound. Keeping my eyes closed, not wanting to end this dream-like state, I lifted my hips slightly and moved my hands into his hair to hurry along the tortuous process. As my fingers slid through the short locks, it was then that I realized that it wasn’t Ash in bed with me. My eyes flew open as I cried, “Stop! Please stop!”

“Scarlett, you need to call him back,” Mason’s voice pulled me from my reminiscent thoughts. “I didn’t even realize it was your phone on the table and I answered it. He didn’t say anything… just hung up…”

I snatched the phone from his hands and immediately called him back. My body was shaking with panic; I could only imagine what Ash had thought when Mason answered my phone so early in the morning. Silently praying for his understanding as the phone rang, I was relieved that he answered and didn’t completely ignore me. I needed to explain everything quickly.

“Ash, thank God,” I said as soon as he picked up. “I can explain.”

“That’s really not necessary, Scarlett,” he replied icily. “I heard what I needed to.”

“It’s not what you think…” I tried to clarify as the tears began rolling down my cheeks. “My phone was in his room, I wasn’t. I promise.”

“Whatever, Scarlett. I’m just going to go back home; I don’t know why I even came here in the first place. I guess I just needed to confirm what I already knew.”

“What did you just say? You’re gonna go home? You’re here?” I asked completely confused.

I heard him sigh dejectedly on the other end of the phone before he answered. “Yes, Max and I came last night. I hadn’t heard from you and I thought you may need the support.”

If I didn’t already love him so incredibly much, I would’ve fallen head over heels for him in that moment. He had come all the way to Florida to be there for me, knowing that I was most likely an emotional mess over my ex-boyfriend’s overdose.

“Ash, I swear to you, nothing happened. Mase checked himself out of the hospital yesterday. I must’ve sat my phone down by the bed when I was helping him get settled. I slept on the couch… I promise I’m telling you the truth,” I pled through my sobs. At some point during the conversation, Mason had gone back into the bedroom, and I was thankful for the privacy.

We both sat there on the phone quietly for what seemed like forever. I didn’t know what else to say; I needed so badly for him to believe me. After all we had been through, I didn’t want to lose him over a misunderstanding.

Finally, his voice broke the silence, “Okay, I believe you. As hard as it is for me, I’m trusting you; please don’t let me down.”

A huge weight was lifted off my chest with his words, and I needed to see him immediately. “Where are you at?” I asked.

“We are at some hotel by the airport… I’m not even sure. It was so late when we got in last night, we just stopped at the first place we saw. Where are you?”

“We are at the Bentley Hotel.”

Even Ash couldn’t help but laugh at the irony of the name. “Are you serious? Who booked that place?”

Chuckling, I replied, “Yeah, pretty awesome, right?”

“Yes, very. Ok, well I’m gonna assume that Rat is fine since he is out of the hospital, so Max and I are coming to get you, Butterfly. We’ll be there in just a bit, wait for us in the lobby, okay?”

Even though it gutted me to leave Mason so soon, I needed to reassure Ash that he was who I was in love with and wanted to be with; there was no way I was arguing with him. After all he was right- Mase was fine; he had people there to take care of him and to make sure that he got back home okay. I needed to take care of myself and the functioning relationships I still had. I knocked on the bedroom door and despondent grey eyes greeted me.

“You don’t need to say anything, Angel. I heard,” he mumbles.

Seeing him like this was almost as heartbreaking as seeing him lying half dead in the hospital bed, completely dejected and crestfallen. I brought my hand to his cheek and my thumb caressed back and forth over his smooth skin. He closed his eyes and pressed his palm against my palm. Once again, tears streamed down my face as my heart broke for him… for me… for the us that could’ve been.

He opened his eyes and leaned forward until his forehead was pressed against mine. Staring deep into my eyes, he whispered, “Please don’t go, Angel. We can make this work, I know we can.”

His combination of his promising words, the look of determination of his face, and the feel of his breath on my lips was almost enough to convince me that he was right… almost. I inhaled a deep breath before speaking. “Mase, so much has happened between us. We can’t just pretend that it hasn’t. We can never get back to where we were.”

“We can be better than we were, Scarlett. Please just give me a chance.”

I brushed away the wetness from his cheekbone and I placed my finger over his lips as he was about to say something else. “I can’t Mase. I love you, but I just can’t. Please understand.”

Afraid that if he said anything else, I would break down and tell him that I would stay with him and give us a chance, I turned on my heel, grabbed my bag, and walked into the hotel hallway. Just before the door closed behind me, I heard him say, “I will never stop loving you, Angel.”

I made it to the elevator before I completely broke down sobbing. Leaning against the wall, I let it all out, and I stayed there until I had no more tears left to cry. I then slipped into the bathroom and washed my face the best I could, but there was no getting rid of the puffy red eyes that stared back at me in the mirror. I took several deep breaths and did my best to regain my composure before heading downstairs.

Thirty minutes later I was standing in the extravagant lobby, my bag at my feet, waiting for Ash to get there. As soon as I saw his long blonde hair come through the main entrance, I took off running towards him. Nearly tackling him to the floor, I jumped on him and began kissinghim all over his face. Laughing and squeezing me tightly, I knew he felt the same relief and comfort that I did being back in his arms. I saw Max standing a few feet away, giving us our space, he had a huge smile plastered on his face. I grinned back, thanking him silently for his support. Despite the numerous bumps and detours of the previous year and a half, I felt that I had finally found the path I was supposed to be on to find my happiness.