Fake (A Pretty Pill) (16 page)

“Are you gonna kill me?”

“Ah, no.”

“Do you have a label?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, tell me your label and let’s get the hell out of here.” he smiles.

“Bipolar.”

“
Sucks, my step-sister is bipolar.” he suddenly sighs.

“Should I stay here?” I ask, noting the change in his mood.

“No, you should definitely come along.  Just promise me you’ll stay on your meds while you’re around me.” he requests.

“Um,
I was planning on it.”

“Cool.”
he says.

I clear my throat, “I’ve got to buy a mobile phone.”

“Oh, okay.  I’m from Pismo beach, but I know SLO pretty well.” he reasons, nodding.

“SLO?”

“San Luis Obispo city or
SLO.  It’s easier than saying the full name.”

“I’ve been calling it San Luis for short.”

“Nah man; San Luis is a city in Arizona.” he chuckles.

“Wow, everyone must think I’m an idiot.  Jade calls it San Luis too
.”

“She your girl?” he asks.

“No, she’s my sister.  I don’t really have a girl.” I explain.

“We
ll, you’re not from around here so I guess you just look like a tourist when you say it wrong.  You’re Australian right?”

“Yeah, what gave it away?”
I chuckle.

“Your accent.  You sound a bit like that wolverine guy.” he points out.

“Hugh Jackman?”

“Yeah
, a younger version of him.”

“Thanks
.” I say chuffed.

“No worries,
um, I’ll meet you downstairs then in five.”

“Yep, sounds good
.”

Isi.

Wow, I haven’t been home this early for
ages.  Mom will be at the Country Club playing tennis with her ‘friends’.  Dad will be at his work.  It’s so good to see no-one.

I’m finally sitting back in my room, having walked the perimeter of the house for the first time in years, when I hear my phone beep.

I’ve missed three calls from an unknown number.

And I have one text.

U
nknown:

Isi, answer your phone or text me that you’re OK.  It’s Silas.

Today, 14:38

I place the number in my contacts under Silas and reply.

Me:

I’m OK.  I was walking around my house since it was
quiet, which is nice.

Today, 14:42

Silas
:

Oh, good… I was worried.

Today, 14:43

Me:

Nothing to worry about.  I’m all good.  What about you?

Today, 14:45

Silas:

Out and about; bought this phone.  Hanging with a guy named Hank.  We’re eating at a diner.

Today, 14:47

Me:

Excellent.  What are your plans for tomorrow?

Today, 14:50

Silas:

They include you.

Today, 14:51

Me:

Me?

Today, 14:51

Silas:

Yes, you.  I’
m manned with a bus timetable, phone and lots of time.  Reserved 8am morning session for therapy, then heading to gym for a work out and then I’m keeping afternoons free for hanging with you.

Today, 14:
54

Me:

What about your family?

Today, 14:56

Silas:

You’ll love them
.

Today, 14:
57

Me:

You want them to meet me?

Today, 14:58

Silas:

T
hat’s a seriously dumb question. I’m not even going to answer that.

Today, 15:00

Me
:

Why?

Today, 15:01

Silas:

This is stupid; just answer your
phone.

Today, 15:02

I’m chuckling when the phone rings and of course it’s Silas.

“What do you mean why?” he asks.

“Why do you want me to meet them?”

“You’re my best friend
.  Why wouldn’t you get to know them?” he reasons.

“You
not only want me to meet them but you want me to get to know them as well?” I ask, rolling on my bed, so that I’m now facing the ceiling.

“Do I have to spoon feed
you how all this works?”  He asks.

“Yes.  Feed it to me
Silas.”

“Oh Jesus,
now that just sounded suggestive and rude.” he chuckles down the phone.

“You’ve been without sex too long.”

“I bet you have too.” he counters.

“Touché.”

“Well, usually friends take each other home to meet their parents and get permission to play together.” he says.

I’m not missing the huge innuendo that he’s throwing in there.  It’s just a bit of fun, but it makes me feel all tingly.

“Okay, but I’m not desperate for my parents to find out about you.” I explain.

“I’m not
keen to meet your fire-breathing dragon mom either, but they still need to know so they can manage your play dates better.” he chuckles.

“I don’t want my mom anywhere near my play date schedule.  She’ll have me primped and plucked and plastered with fake tan and make
up; and then she’ll have me sit and coo over dumbass photos of designer babies with names that sound more like clothing labels and Disney characters.  I’ll be forced to find my service revolver and shoot myself in the head if I have to do that.”  I argue.

“You have a service revolver?”

“No, I’m just being silly.”

“C
an you shoot a gun?”

“Yes.”

“Damn.  That’s kind of hot.  Do you know how to use handcuffs?” he asks.

“Silas,
focus.”

“I’m very focused, and you’re the one t
hat pointed out I haven’t had sex in ages.” he reasons.

“We had sex this morning, remember?”

“I think I’d remember that.  I didn’t even get to take my pants off.” he laments.

“Well according to Ethan, you
were well and truly on the pathway to heaven.”

“Heaven?”

“Well, you know what I mean, fabulous sex.”

“You refer to sex with you as heaven?” he asks.

I burst out laughing.  He actually sounds a bit interested.  He really must be deprived.

“Close.”  I answer.

“Don’t say stuff like that.  You have no idea what that does to me.”

“Oh come on Silas.  You’ll have every woman within a ten mile radius attempting to get into your pants
now that you’re out.” I explain.

“You live at the beach don’t you
?”

“Yes.  Avila Beach.”

I hear him in a muffled conversation with someone beside him.

‘How far is Avila Beach from here?’

‘Ten miles.’

“Okay, I can deal with that.” he says back into the phone.

“Not me you twit.”

“Not you what?”

“I won’t be attempting to get into your pants.” I explain.

“
You say that now, but who knows, you might find me irresistible in the end.  You live within the bounds of your prediction.” he reasons.

“I’m too old for you.” I laugh.

“That’s only if we go by chronological age.  Mentally you’re around the same age as me.” He reasons.

“Oh my God,
you’re not only a mega flirt; you’re hell bent on insulting my intelligence too.”

“No
, I wasn’t insulting your intelligence; I was insulting your emotional aptitude.”

“
Wow that makes me feel so much better.” I grumble.

“Stop whining and put a reminder in your calendar to meet me tomorrow in SLO for lunch.”

“Okay.” I acquiesce.

“Don’t say it like it’s a chore.  I’ll see you tomorrow.  I’ll be the one with the pathway of destruction in my wake.”

“I told them they were making a mistake letting you out.”

“
And would they listen?”

“No.” I chuckle.

“Goes to show that sleeping with the staff brings results.” he points out.

“You slept with Dr. Jensen too?”

“No, I slept with Ethan; but don’t tell God; he might send him to another planet.” he says in mock seriousness.

“Oh God,
he really did tell you some of his bullshit.” I moan.

“Yes; it had me seriously concerned about who they deemed a mentally fit pers
on; but hey, they’ve let me out and I only intend on killing three people today.” he says.

“Well that’s just
great.” I say with mock enthusiasm.

“Yeah,
but I think Hank’s worried.  I think he thinks I might be serious.” he says.

A male voice from behind yells out,
‘no way, but if he’s not for you, my phone number is,’
and then I hear a muffled shuffling, and then laughing.

“Silas, I’ll leave you to your bonding.”

“Okay, but tomorrow lunch.  I’ll text a location when I discover one.”

“Okay.”

I hear the male voice from behind again,
‘I love you.’

Boys
.

***

“You don’t need any more board shorts Silas.” I explain.  He’s already bought five pairs.

“I always need board shorts.  They’re my uniform.
  I wear them when I train.”

“Me too.” Says Hank, who is currently hanging out
with us, but he’s okay.  He’s typical of a lot of the guys I grew up with around here.  The year my class graduated, it was populated with more surfers and skateboarders than jocks or any other athlete.  And those skateboarders were highly skilled and very athletic.  They looked so good without their shirts on, skating around and, ahhh, but I digress.

“What do you do for work Hank?”

“I make surfboards in Pismo Beach.”

“Figures,
you look like the sort of laid back guy to have that as a passion.” I smile.

“What can I say, I’m a passionate guy
.” He offers, winking.

“Stop hitting on my friend.” Silas warns.

“Dude, she’s gorgeous and she’s in front of me.  It’s gonna happen.  I don’t mean anything by it, unless you want it to.” He winks at me again.

“Seriously, I’ll punch you in the face
.” Silas explains, somewhere between a joke and slightly serious.  He reaches out and grabs my hand and we continue up the street.

“So much violence and wanton destruction.” I sigh, shaking my head in mock disapproval.

Silas looks down at me and smirks.

“Oh, there’s a sale on end of season stock over there.” Hank points out to another shop.

“Let’s have a look.” Silas enthuses.

“Do we have to?” I whine.

“You’re a girl.  You’re supposed to love shopping.” Hank says.

“Great observation skills there buddy.” I say sarcastically.  “But shopping and me don’t really like each other.  Not unless it takes me
five minutes to come and go.”

Hank erupts in laughter, and I just look at Silas in confusion.  He rolls his eyes.

“Seriously?” I say in exasperation.

“He’s horny.” Silas reasons.

“He’s twelve.  That doesn’t even make sense.” I counter.

“I’m twenty and
horny; and I haven’t had weed, alcohol or a woman for more than a month.” he argues.

“Go out and meet someone then.” I reason.

“I would, but there’s this thing called a restrictive curfew.” Hank states.  “I don’t want to mess with the program.  Mom’s paid big money to get me to go clean.” He explains.