Fake (A Pretty Pill) (35 page)

We’re dancing around each other, and he’s talking the smack and offering a few slaps to the side of my head.

I land a couple of strikes to his shoulder and I get a decent body shot in.

Neither of us would be scoring any
significant points as of yet. And in the final seconds of the first round, Zavala pulls me into a clinch and slams me to the fence.

I don’t plan on giving him that opportunity again.

“Loosen up Silas.” Ben tells me as I sit down and let Hansen smear me with more Vaseline.

Ben grabs a bag of ice and lightly runs it across my shoulders, easing the
tension in those muscles. 

Hansen cleans up the scratch
and Ben continues to encourage me to step it up.

I plan on finishing this
soon.  I’m not keen on a decision based on points.  I want this to be a concrete win.

We’re
back on with round two for maybe 3 seconds when he attempts a sweeping kick, which connects with my calf but doesn’t move me.  He comes in for another clinch.  He’s desperate to secure a take down and I’m desperate to secure a KO.

I
lock in a body kick to his right side and then I quickly follow it up by connecting a kick to his left cheek.  He’s a little dazzled but he’s still moving, so I push it for all I’m worth and move in close.  It gives him the opportunity to land a few body shots, but I manage to connect a right elbow to his jaw and follow up with a left jab.  He’s pissing blood now, and I want to end it.  It’s time to finish this shit, so I do.  I push him back and then I bring up my knee and barge him in the chest for a body shot and he loses balance and tumbles down.

And
then I’m on him, punching his head, shoulders and chest.  Downward blows, when his arms get in the way, they cop it too.

I’m pulled off.

He’s not getting up, but he’s not knocked out either. I’ve gotta hand it to him, he’s still conscious.  But it’s a TKO, it’s over.

***

“You wasted too much time in there.” Ben says.

“I know.”

“What were you doing?  Asking him out on a date?”

“Yeah.  We’ve arranged to go Salsa dancing next weekend.”

“I’m serious Silas.  You can’t waste time walking around looking like you don’t know what you’re doing in there.” Ben suggests.  “Have you forgotten everything?”

“I fixed it.  I didn’t waste time in the second round.”

“Look, I know.  But I’m glad we’ve secured a few more fights for you before you go back to UFC.  You need to be reacquainted with it all.  You should’ve finished him in the first round.  He was rubbish – you should’ve been able to smash him Silas.” Ben laments.

He sighs.

“I’m sorry Ben.  I was just being a bit lazy I suppose.”

“There’s no lazy Silas; not ever.  There’s no acting like a novice either.  The next guy you’ll be fighting isn’t rubbish; he’s good, really good.” Ben stresses.

I sigh, “So are we driving back now?” I ask.

“We will, I just need to talk to Hansen.  You should ring your girl.”

“Yeah, good thinking.” I nod, pulling my phone out and sitting on the bench in the dressing room, watching Ben and Hansen talk animatedly over the next fight I have secured for a fortnight’s time.

Isi.

“Hello.” I say down the phone.

“Hey gorgeous.”

“Did you win?”  I ask.  I’m really hoping so.

“Ah, yeah, of course.”

“Was he good?”

“He was shit, but it was a good introduction.” he weighs up.

“Oh, okay.  Are you pleased with your performance?”

“Nup.  But it’ll be different next time.” he states.

“I wish I could’ve come.”

“That’s okay.  How’s Jade?”

“She’s still
sick.  Both ends.” I whisper.

“Now that’s a nice visual.” he mutters.

I laugh down the phone.

“And Ben?”
He asks.

“He’s being a cute little cherub.” I enthuse.

“Are you getting clucky on me?”

“No,
he’s just adorable.” I defend.

“I don’t mind you getting clucky.” he chuckles.

“There’s no point in getting clucky.” I point out.  “Besides, I can come over here, do the cuddle and play thing and then give him back when he begins stressing.” I explain.

“True.”

“Are you guys coming back soon?” I ask.

“Yeah.  Ben’s just talking to Hansen.”

“Oh good.  What time do you think you’ll get here?”

“About 1
am.”

“So I’ll see you in bed then.” I reason.

“Yeah, I’ll be the one that comes into the room and starts feeling you up.”

“It better be you.  The alternatives would seriously
be awkward.”

He laughs.

“I love you.” I say.

“I love you too.”

“You happy to be getting back to normal?” I ask.

“I’ve been doing
this kind of normal for years.  This bullshit stuff that keeps happening to us is kind of normal.” He sighs.  “Drama is kind of normal.”

“What will we do if things become average?”

“Average?”

“You know, no bullshit
just smooth sailing.” I explain.

“Have more sex?”

“Silas.” I chuckle, “I’m serious.”

“So am I.”

“You know what I mean though.  You’ll get bored of me.” I explain.

“
My mind will never achieve smooth sailing.  After a few years with me, you’ll be craving boringness. Peace and quiet sounds awesome.  I’d love it.  ” he says.

“I suppose we could travel.” I reason.

“Now you’re talking.  I could definitely do travel to keep the boring times at bay.  That and have more sex.”

“Aren’t we having enough?” I laugh.

“I’m missing out today so no, we aren’t having enough.  You’re my drug.” he responds.

“Aren’t your drugs a rainbow collection you have twice daily?” I cheekily reply.

“They’re my pills; you’re not my medication; you’re my drug of choice.”

I feel all warm and fuzzy.

“You’re making me melt into a puddle on the floor saying stuff like that.”

“I wish I was there to lap you up.” he whispers.

“Shit Silas.” I giggle.  “I’m going to have to work on myself now.” I jokingly argue.

“Make a video and send it to me.”

Holy shit, he sounds serious.

“Ah, no
; no videos and I’ll probably wait to show you in person anyway.” I chuckle.

“Shit,
I’m getting an erection now thinking about that.  Say horrible stuff to me so it goes down before Ben notices.” he pleads.

“
Darla and Glen having sex.” I offer.  It makes me shudder to think about my mom having sex with a young, actually, with any guy – yuck.

“Fuck it Isi.” he whisper shouts, “I said horrible things to cool down an erection
, not monstrous things that kill the libido”

I’m laughing my head off… that’s funny.

“I’m not laughing.” Silas says.  “That image just popped into my brain and I can’t remove it now.” He grumbles.

I’m laughing even harder
now.

“I’ve gotta go Isi.  Some guy’s just given Ben something and Ben’s motioning for me.”

“Okay, I love you, see you later in the night.” I reply, wiping the tears from my eyes.

“Love you too.”

Silas.

Ben’s behavior is strange.  He won’t show Hansen the paper he has in his hands and Hansen is a little put out.

“It’s personal.” he explains to Hansen.

“From a stranger?” Hansen replies.

“Please
Hansen.  It’s not even something I should see.” Ben says pleadingly.

Hansen breaths in, looks at Ben and
then nods.

“Okay, but it better not be something that makes him lose his focus.  This next fight won’t be a walk in the park.” Hansen points out and collects up his bag, slinging it over his shoulder.

“Thanks Hansen.” Ben says, clapping him on the back.

Hansen comes over to me.  I guess he thinks I’ve b
een screwing around.  I can see there’s a photo attached to the paper.  He probably thinks I knocked some chick up and it’s a picture of my love child.  The thought is plastered across his face.

He claps me on the back and we say goodbye.

I look at Ben, who’s trying not to look at the page stapled to a photo; but he’s struggling to keep his distance.

“Fuck Silas.” he whispers.

He hands it over to me.

It’s a genuine forensic shot of a guy with his hand on his cock.

A tie wrapped around his neck.

An anchor point is obviously outside of the sho
t and above him.

He has a slack jaw.

His eyes stare blankly.

He’s dead.

I’m breathing rapidly and I’m suddenly feeling ill
.  I have a sick and sinking feeling about what comes next.

It’
s a photocopy of sensitive information from my mental health records.  It has my name throughout the writing.  There is mention and then a question mark for autoerotic asphyxiation; which has been circled by the sender in red pen.  If the press got a hold of this, I’d be ruined before I even started back up; no matter what the truth was.  No matter that my personal and sensitive documentation has been violated.

“What do you want me to do?” Ben croaks.

“It wasn’t like that.” I say.

“You don’t need to
tell me anything.” Ben says, but he’s upset.

“I want to tell you.”

He nods, but he’s not talking and we’re here in this moment, this very awkward moment, whispering.

I need to get straight to the point here, so I just tell it how it was.

“I masturbated to thoughts of Shae the first week I was in Gateways.  Afterwards, I felt really bad, so I tried to asphyxiate myself in a
suicide attempt
.  I didn’t do it the other way around, but they briefly questioned it; because they needed to look into all options.  That’s the week I went in for full observation – the first time.” I explain.

“I remember.  They told us it was a suicide attempt.” Ben nods.

“It was.”

“This is fucked.” Ben sneers.

“I was sick at the time.” I gasp.  I’m fearful.  This has stripped me of any rage and anger.  I feel intense fear and I’m shaking from it.  “I wasn’t thinking, I mean I wasn’t in my right mind.”

“It’s that motherfucker Silas.  We need to go to the police with this.” he says
, punctuating his point by jabbing his finger on the paper in my hands.

I’m just shaking my head no.

“You have to.  If this gets out.” He groans.  “
FARCK.
” He screams and kicks my bag.

“I’m so sorry Ben.”

“It’s not your fucking fault Silas.” he screams.  “I’m going to fucking kill this cunt.”

I’m watching his careful demeanor fall to pieces in front of me.
  “You don’t fucking screw with my family and get away with it.”  He argues angrily.  “I should have fucking killed him when I had a chance.” he croaks and drops to the seat, placing his head in his hands.

This is such a
weird switch of roles.  I’m normally in rage mode and Ben’s normally calm.  I’m not calm true, but I’m not raging either.

The look in his eyes is fierce.

“Let’s take this to the police now.” I offer, changing my mind about telling them.

Ben looks up at
me and his eyes narrow onto the paper I have in my shaking hands.

“I think th
at’d be wise.” he growls, turning the page over and showing me the back.

Leave Isobelle alone.

***

I’m crawling into bed with Isi at dawn.

“Silas,
I haven’t been able to sleep since you called; what’s going on?”

“I need to tell you something.” 

“Okay.” She says and pulls me into her arms; the only place I ever want to be again.

Silas.

She knows that that
lunatic is out there, and that he’s probably been stalking us and following our patterns and routines.  The cops are all onto it properly now.  This is not going away just because we haven’t seen him for a while.