Falcon Song: A love story (16 page)

She went to her last childbirth class by herself and was glad she’d never have to face all those couples again in her life. She’d needed to do it for the baby’s sake, but it had been a heart wrenching experience.

For the first time, pulling up stakes was more troubling to her. Going from a real home back to the hotel, was bad enough, but this time she would be alone over Christmas and it was an intimidatingly lonely thought.

Even worse, John was finally looking like he wasn’t feeling great a good portion of the time and for the first time, the other day she had watched him struggle to pull something from his memory and ultimately give up. The tumor was finally starting to affect his amazingly sharp mind.

That last morning, he woke up with the beginnings of a headache. She could see it in the small lines between his eyebrows and the shadows deep in his eyes. They hadn’t spoken much of truly important things, but the realization was there all of the time now that this good, honorable man was dying. Even though she had only known him a short time, it was one of the most heartbreaking things she’d ever had to watch.

He came into the kitchen, dressed for work, and she turned from the stove and smiled at him. She couldn’t fix his troubles, but she could do her best to brighten this inevitable road to death. She put a plate of a scrambled egg skillet on the breakfast table in the alcove by the window and then put a gentle hand to his cheek and looked at him. “Headache already?”

He nodded silently and went to the fridge for orange juice. She wished they were closer friends and that he felt like he could talk to her about what he was thinking and feeling. Bringing hot croissants, she put them on the table in front of him and came to stand behind him and gently rubbed his temples for a moment. “Does that help at all, or make it worse?”

“Both, I think. But I’m fine, Kate. Sit down and eat your breakfast before it gets cold.”

She sat across from him. “Should I say the prayer?” He nodded again and she began. She asked for a blessing on the food and then added one for John and then added one for both of them to be watched over and then closed the prayer and he looked up at her.

“You’ve never been alone at this time of year before, have you?”

She passed him the eggs as she admitted, “No. It’s going to be a little weird. Do you usually spend Christmas with someone?”

“Sometimes. For a while, after my divorce, I spent it with my children. Then when they outgrew that, I’d sometimes visit my mother, or my sister’s family. Now my mother has passed away and my sister lives in the Bahamas. But there have been several years I’ve been alone. It’s not too bad. It makes for a more quiet, peaceful holiday, but sometimes that’s a good thing. Peace and quiet is good for spiritual introspection. This is after all, a celebration of Christ’s birth.”

Kate nodded. That would be true. It would still be incredibly lonely, but maybe she could simply focus on Christ and get through it okay. He was watching her as he sipped his juice and wondered out loud, “Why don’t you get up there, Kate and then see how things go. If you’re busy right away, fine, but if not. You’re only going to be a few hours from your family. Maybe they could come to you if you feel like there’s no way you could go visit them. And then catch a plane back here Christmas Eve. The restaurant will be closed for a couple of days anyway, even if you’ve gotten hired. Then you can hit it again after. Just put the tickets on your expense account.”

“I’ll think about it. What are you going to be doing?”

The same as usual. I’ll probably go golfing with friends a few times, and I usually go to some Christmas concerts. That type of thing. Christmas morning I go to the homeless mission and help out there. But mostly, I’ll just work here.” He gave her a sad smile. “Now that I’m dying, I’ve finally figured out that a great deal of my life is pointless. When I failed with my family, I switched my focus to building an empire. In retrospect, that doesn’t mean much. At the very least, I should have tried again. Don’t make the same mistake I made, Kate. Go see your family if you can.”

She finished her breakfast in a somber, introspective mood, and then got up to clean up and straighten the kitchen. She needed to be making some plans for after the baby was born. It would be too easy to bury her sorrows under a career in business and make the same mistake John had made. Sure, she would have a child, but as a single parent, it would be even more paramount that she try to live life on a more eternal track.

In a way, she was incredibly grateful for John’s perspective. He had certainly had to face facts in the big picture and it was enlightening to be reminded that there’s a purpose to this earthly existence. She didn’t necessarily believe John had failed the test as he seemed to worry, but she knew he had massive regrets. She had a couple as well, but maybe she could do better in the future, especially where her child was concerned.

She came down the hall with her big suitcase and purse, and John automatically picked the suitcase up and carried it to her car and put it in the trunk for her and then stood beside the car looking at her. “Be safe, Kate. Amarillo is a nice town, but be careful. And don’t overdo. That baby isn’t far off. Get the bellman to bring this for you and order in room service. I don’t want you to be miserable just sitting waiting, but maybe this should be the last restaurant you deal with until the baby is a few months old.”

She put an arm around his waist and gave him a half hug. “Thank you for your concern, John. I’ll think about it. Don’t drive if you have to take pain medication. Get Gwen’s son to come and take you if you need to.”

At that, he gave her a real smile. “Thanks, but I’ll wait for this tumor to kill me and not a reckless driver.

Pulling away from his house, she considered what he’d said about traveling when she was this pregnant. That same issue had crossed her mind, but the down time would kill her. She would go crazy with missing Jason. She thought about her new husband, even though the marriage had been for business and felt guilty just for thinking that. But it was true. All work and no play made Kate a dull girl, but the alternative was too painful.

She couldn’t believe her heart was still so sore after this many months, but it was what it was and she needed to keep busy. Still, the airlines wouldn’t even let her get on if she was too outlandishly big. She needed to wrap up Amarillo and San Francisco as quickly as she could, both because of the baby and because of how fast John was going down hill.

Having the bellman take her bags up was very nice and she followed him onto the elevator with a sigh. That had been a hellaciously long drive, even with stopping and walking around every hour or so. She walked into the room, tipped the bellman, kicked her shoes off and headed for a long, hot shower and then bed. She was definitely going to take John up on his room service idea.

The next morning, she applied to work at the restaurant, but the manager simply shook his head and said, “Look, lady. I’m sure you need this job, or you wouldn’t be asking, but there’s no way I can have someone as pregnant as you are walking around here working. The patrons would be outraged.”

Undaunted, Kate said, “Then let me work in the office. You can see my training and recommendations.”

“I’d love to, but I have a wonderful book keeper slash assistant and we’re all under control that way. I’d hire you anyway, but it would be a waste of the owner’s money and I take his trust pretty seriously. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to try elsewhere.”

He was so sincere and she felt so good about him she decided to just go with her gut on this one and let him know right up front what she was up too.

She glanced at his name tag. “Well, Glen, in light of that. And the fact you’ve admitted you take John Garland’s trust pretty seriously, I’ll tell you right up front that I work for him. I’m a consultant of sorts, I guess you might say. I usually come in and get to work without anyone realizing that at first, but this baby has become a bit of an issue. And rightly so.

“But I still need to work here for a while and give John my honest opinion of how things here are going. It’s not that he doesn’t trust you. It’s just that I’ve been able to improve some things at his other locations and he decided to send me to all of them. Even the ones that are thriving, like here. And I hope you’ll continue to be as good to work with as you were when you thought you were sending me packing, because we need to work together here as amiably as possible.”

Glen had been surprisingly willing to work with her as soon as he spoke to John on the phone and confirmed that what she was saying was true. He ended up not telling the rest of the staff she wasn’t just another person he’d hired. He had her start as an expeditor. That way, she could get to know everyone and sort of work between the kitchen staff and the wait staff and when they weren’t rushed, he let her help in the office as well.

At first glance, this restaurant looked to be thoroughly under control, but Kate knew she needed to spend some time here to make sure of that. She was also only working five or six hour days because of the advanced pregnancy and was grateful Glen had been so willing to accommodate that.

Back in her hotel after a couple of days of settling in, she relaxed for a few hours and then went out to do some shopping. The shorter work days accommodated that and she needed to get things shipped to Wye right away. Christmas Eve was in just four days.

She bought things for all of her family and for Jason’s parents and a couple of her friends back home and for Mark and his family. When it came to John, she had no idea what to get and had to let that go for the time being while she continued to think about it. She wished she could send something to Jason, but that was out of the question. Still, she wished.

She was actually on her way to ship the gifts when she decided not to. Wye was only a four or five hour drive from here. She called Glen on her cell phone and arranged to have all of Christmas Eve off and then only work the late morning and early afternoon of the day before. It might not be completely wise, but she was going to sneak home to see her parents on the night of the twenty third. She’d come after dark and be gone again the same night and hopefully, no one else in Wye would ever know that a humongously pregnant Kate Birch-Garland had finally come home.

Once the decision was made, she phoned her parents and Kiersten and then she was so excited she could hardly wait. Both excited and sad. She wondered how hard it would be to be that close to Jason again and know he was entirely out of her reach.

As she approached the Oklahoma City metropolitan area, she became more and more emotional. She hadn’t seen these people in more than six months and coming home made her so happy it was painful. Happy and heartbroken. How was she going to bring herself to leave again?

Knowing she wanted this to be a happy reunion, she struggled to get her emotions under control so she could greet them all with only the smiling portion of what she was feeling.

It was full dark when she slowly pulled up their street and into her old parking spot on the drive. Once again, the emotions threatened to overcome her. She couldn’t even stand to look at the house next door. This trip would be good for her. Knowing how much it hurt just to sit here in her car next to his parents’ house, she’d be hesitant to do this very often. Maybe next time she’d just have to see if her family could come to her, except she knew how hard it was to take her dad places. Then again, maybe she’d just have to suck it up every few months. She got out of the car a complete wash of different emotions.

The reunion was incredibly sweet and incredibly bitter at the same time. It was heaven to have her mom hug her and she broke down and cried in spite of her good intentions. The hug was a bit awkward because of her size and she was somewhat embarrassed about how blatant her mistakes of that fateful night with the champagne were. Kiersten helped that. She put both hands on Kate’s tummy and laughed and said, “Kate, you look like a mountain!” That helped to break the tension.

Seeing her dad was by far the hardest part of it all. He was a shell of the man he’d been six months ago, though he’d been bedridden even then. To Kate, he looked like he’d aged twenty years and not six months. He accepted her awkward hug and then looked into her eyes with his filling with tears and then took her left hand to examine the huge diamond ring John had given her when they’d married. He didn’t look very happy about any of it and Kate was crushed, both at what terrible shape he was in and how unhappy her life had obviously made him. The thought that she was the one to blame for his downward spiral made her sick.

They all talked and laughed and ate and exchanged gifts until finally, at twenty after eleven, Kiersten got up and said she had to get back to her family. She reached into her pocket and handed Kate another small box and said, “I promised I’d get this to you. I hope that’s okay.” Kate took it without knowing what it was and suspecting it was something that would upset her, put in right into her pocket. She’d look at it later when her family wasn’t around.

Kate knew she needed to get going too. She was only going to drive part of the way and then stop and get another hotel, but she still needed to be awake enough to get that far.

When Kiersten was gone, Kate went to tell her father goodbye, and it was a long and tearful process. She knew he’d had such hopes for both of their lives. His hopes for his had been stolen by a foolish driver and many of the ones for hers had been lost through a foolish decision. Both had been hard on him and together they had apparently crushed his spirit. Kate walked back down the hall from his room in complete distress. She’d known it was going to be hard to leave, but that was before she had any idea of the shape he was in.