Falcon Song: A love story (14 page)

Kate put a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, John. That had to have been hard to watch.”

“It was hell.” He tossed his pen and leaned back in his chair. “You know, Kate. I’ve been pretty successful. In everything but my family. But you know what? I’d give it all up if I could switch that around. It’s taken me a lifetime, but I’ve finally realized that family is the most important thing.”

“I’m only twenty, but what I’ve realized is that all we can do is our best. There are mistakes along the way.” She put a hand on her stomach. “Sometimes huge ones. But all we can do is repent and try to do a little better. Sometimes we make colossal failures, but God knows if we’re honestly giving it our all.”

“You’re amazingly wise for a whippersnapper. I thought you said you were nineteen.”

“I was. Now, I’m twenty. My birthday was August eighteenth.”

John sighed and picked up his pen. “Oh, Kate. I’m sorry. We should have celebrated.”

“My mom sent me a care package with homemade chocolate chip cookies. I was fine. When’s your birthday?”

“Not ‘til March. I’ll be forty seven.”

Kate smiled. “We’ll celebrate then.”

Whether it was because John was closer, or some other reason, the two restaurants in San Antonio were well run, in Kate’s opinion. She spent two weeks at each , made minimal changes that helped the bottom line, but only marginally, and moved on to Austin, where John had another two restaurants.

As she carried her bags into the Residence Inn there, she noticed for the first time that her burgeoning tummy was awkward and in the way and carrying her heavy bags made something low in her abdomen pull uncomfortably.

She bought bigger clothes again. This time some of them were actual maternity clothing and she had those same mixed emotions about having a baby that she’d been having. She was beginning to truly get excited about having a baby, but there was something so sad about doing it alone.

She made another appointment with a new OB/GYN and this time when she went in, they did an ultrasound and Kate came out of the office with an adorable photo of this tiny, tiny little boy, but nobody to show it off to. She thought about how she and Jason had planned to have a son together and name it after Kennen. Having the son, but not being able to share him with Jason felt so wrong somehow. She looked at the photo in her car in the parking lot and wished she could have sent it to Jason. He would have been so excited.
Oh, Jason, why did you have to change so much? You would have loved him.

She cried all the way back to her hotel. There, she scanned it in to her computer and e-mailed it to her mother and Kiersten. They’d have mixed emotions as well, but at least they’d be excited for him.

Kate had gotten into the habit of changing the radio stations to classical or rock when Aerie’s songs came on and she automatically did it at the restaurant in Austin one day and one of the other waitresses, who happened to be tall and red haired turned and snarled at her, “Stop doing that Kate. I love Aerie’s music and y’all turn it off every time. How can you turn off someone as hot as Jason Falcon? Why do you like that instrument only stuff anyway? Y’all always act like you’re so much more cultured and refined than the rest of us.
”

The girl’s attack came out of the blue and Kate, who was still masquerading as a twenty year old waitress, looked at her in shock and the girl went on, “Y’all are so high falutin’, but I don’t see no boyfriend to go with that baby you’re packin’. You wouldn’t know what to do with a hottie star like Jason Falcon if he took y’all straight to bed, so stop with the holier than thou case against Aerie just because they’re country and not some orchestra. It’s not like you own this place.”

Kate was stunned at the confrontation and wished she could fire the girl’s butt right out of there, but she couldn’t. At least not yet. Kate tried to blow off her comments after considering the source, but she kept seeing this tall red haired girl with Jason’s arm around her and for some reason, it made her feel like she truly wouldn’t have been able to attract Jason Falcon anymore. She’d never felt so awkward and ungainly and her slender, willowy figure was indeed gone.

She turned away from the waitress and went into the restroom and put a hand on her belly. She hadn’t meant to get pregnant. In fact, she still couldn’t remember much of that night, but she was, and it was Jason’s. Whether the rest of the world knew or not, she needed to just deal with the fact and move on. That was all there was to it. She wished she was a week or two closer to telling the staff here what she was doing.

That evening, on her way back to the hotel, when she stopped and got gas, Jason’s photo was on the cover of another magazine in front of the C-store counter. He was standing in a tux with a curvy blonde woman, although he didn’t appear to be too cozy with her. He looked good. Wilder, with longer hair and a gold chain sporting a tiny gold Falcon on it, but good. Really, really good. She wished she could ask her mother how he was doing. She looked down at her steadily growing tummy and sighed and then took the magazine and turned it over before she paid for her gas.

It was only a couple of days later that she got a letter from Kiersten, which was strange because she e-mailed nearly every other day. It had been sent to John’s office rather than the hotel and he gave it to her as they sat down with Mark for a meeting. Kate wondered if there was a problem, but didn’t open it right then anyway. John and Mark were waiting for her to get started.

At the first Austin location, Kate suspected there was a problem with comped meals again. The numbers were skewed and the electronics there were somewhat obsolete, although she suspected it wasn’t an electronics issue, but a not using the electronics issue. The kitchen staff was positively lackadaisical about enforcing that orders were run through the order register before they were prepared.

They finished their meeting and then as John and Mark were talking, Kate opened the envelope to pull out a photograph that made her heart skip a beat. It was simply a photo of her and Jason’s lake with the sun setting across it and all the glory of God reflected in the colors of water and sky. She stared at it, and then slowly turned it over. All it said was, “Please come home, Jason”

She must have made a sound, because she looked up to find both John and Mark staring at her. She slipped the photo back into the envelope and put it into her portfolio and began to gather up the rest of the paperwork they’d brought her. Mark went out the door with a wave and John came back to her and asked, “Are you all right, Kate? Was that letter bad news?”

She took the photo out and handed it to him. “That was where we first talked about getting married.”

John turned the photo over and read the back and then looked back up at Kate. “You said he wasn’t headed in a good direction but you never said you’re still in love with each other. Love can overcome a lot of stuff, Kate. Are you sure you can’t go home and tell him?”

She thought longingly about that and then she remembered the red head and the beer. She thought back to the magazine cover those couple of days before and how wild Jason had looked and shook her head. “No, John. I love Jason, but I’m the one who’s ultimately responsible for my little son’s well being. Jason’s lifestyle wouldn’t be good for a child.”

“It’s a boy then?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Tell me, Kate. How did a nice girl like you get caught up with man with a bad lifestyle? I can’t picture you being that irresponsible, even as a teenager.”

“Jason wasn’t always wild. I’ve known him since the day I was born. He was the most rock solid person on the planet for years and years and years.”

“What happened?”

“He became a country music super star.”

John looked at her for a long moment and then nodded. “I ‘magine that’ll do it. Hang in there.”

“I intend to. See you Thursday. Hopefully I’ll have some better information by then. You take care too.” He narrowed his eyes at that last and then waved to her before reaching up to rub his head between his eyes.

Chapter 14

Kate went to another prenatal appointment and then signed up for a childbirth class. She was the only one there alone and it was a miserable experience for her, even though some of the other couples truly seemed to be enjoying it. Sitting there planning to go through labor without Jason was the most desolate feeling she’d ever known.

On the way home, she called her mother and talked about her maybe being able to come and be with Kate then, although Kate didn’t know for sure where she’d be in another two or two and a half months. Her mother said that of course she’d come and that she’d get Kiersten to come and stay with her dad. “How’s he doing, Mom? Really. He always says he’s fine, but that is such a non word. I only say that when I’m definitely not fine.”

“Katie, I hate to admit it to you, but your father isn’t doing great. I’m not sure what it is, but to me, he seems like he’s fading. That’s the only way I know how to describe it.”

“Is it me, Mom? If I come home, would that fix it? Is he just worrying?”

“Oh, he’s worrying, Kate, but he’d still worry if you were living here and everything was fine. You do what you think is best and don’t make decisions based on your dad and me.”

“If I thought it would help him, I’d come.”

“Is that what you want, Kate?”

“Of course it’s what I want, Mother.”

“But you still feel like you can’t?”

“Not yet. Maybe when the baby is older.”

“Jason still asks about you every few days, Kate.”

“Don’t tell me things like that, Mom. It’s hard enough as it is.”

“I know, Katie, honey. I’m sorry. I just think you need to know he still loves you. You need to forgive him someday.”

“I forgave him long ago. I’m not holding a grudge here. Jason is simply human. It’s not a grudge. I’m just trying to make the best choices for the baby. Parties and girls won’t make for a stable upbringing.”

“But is a stable upbringing worth not having a father?”

“I’ve prayed about this, Mom. You know that.”

“You’re right and I’m sorry. Let me know where I’ll need to come, and around the first week in February, right?”

“Yes, thank you, Mom. Love you.”

“I love you, too, Katie honey. Take care.”

That night, Kate tried to estimate where she’d be in early February. Each restaurant had taken an average of three and a half weeks so far. And she had one more restaurant in Austin, one in Amarillo, one in California and one in Tulsa still. And about two and a half months until she was due. This was going to be nip and tuck. She needed to get this done so she could take some time off once the baby was here. Then if John was through needing her, she’d have to decide what she really wanted to do. She decided to talk to John about it in the morning.

She phoned John at about ten and told him what she’d been thinking about and she was surprised when instead of discussing it with her, he asked her what she was going to be doing for Thanksgiving.

“I’m going to work a long day so the others with families can have more time. Why? Do you need me to do something that day?”

“Actually, I was going to see if you wanted to come to my house and have dinner with me? It’s just going to be me and my Brittany spaniel this year. Since you’re alone too, I thought we could celebrate together. I have some ideas I’d like to run by you. Have you already committed to working? You are the boss there now.”

“No, I could come. Are we going to cook dinner or go out?”

“Cook in of course. I know this is going to sound disloyal or something, but I personally think going out to eat on Thanksgiving is unAmerican.”

“Well tell me what to bring then and I’ll go shopping today so I don’t have to fight the crowds.”

“No, just come. I’ll have everything. Unless there’s some traditional family favorite that’s unusual.”

“No, we’re pretty traditional kinds of folks out in Wye. What time do you want to eat?”

“Why don’t you come by at about eleven and then we’ll eat whenever it’s ready. We’ll see if we can find anyone who knows how to cook.”

“Yeah, good luck with that John. See you day after tomorrow.”

Kate had assumed from his comments, that John didn’t know how to cook and that the restaurants were simply businesses, but when she got there Thanksgiving morning she found out that he was, in fact, a gourmet cook. The two of them tackled a small turkey with all the trimmings and Kate was again amazed at how comfortable she was with this wealthy business man who was nearly the same age as her father.

They were standing side by side chopping celery and onions when John casually said, “Kate, I need to talk to you about a huge favor.”

“Okay. Shoot.”

“I don’t want you to think I’m crazy. But I’m afraid you might.”

Kate laughed. “John, of all the people in this world, you are the least crazy I know. What’s your favor?”

He stopped chopping and looked at her with an intensity that almost did make her nervous. “Kate, a few weeks ago, I was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. I’ve been given from a month, to a year or more to live.”

Kate was thunderstruck and tears sprang to her eyes. “A brain tumor? You’re the sharpest man I’ve ever known. How can that be?”

John shook his head and went back to his chef’s knife. “Who knows any of the difficult questions in this world, Kate? They have no idea what would have caused it. I’ve never smoked or done any kind of drugs or worked with chemicals. They don’t know. They just know they can’t operate and that I’ll lose it mentally before I go.”

“So what kind of favor do you want from me?”

“I want you to help me keep my businesses solvent and prospering until I can get them all sold. I’ve hired a realty firm, and Mark is helping me put together a scholarship foundation for the University of Texas at San Antonio, but he can’t manage the actual restaurants when I’m too far gone, and I’m worried I’m losing this battle faster than I can get everything done.”

Kate wiped at the tears that filled her eyes. “Okay, I’ll help. But I’ll need you to make a concise plan now so I’ll always be doing exactly what you had in mind.”

“That attitude is exactly why I’m asking you to do this. I’ve known from that very first letter that you were completely honest. But Kate, there’s more. The brain tumor isn’t the tricky part.”

She turned to him. “There’s something worse than an inoperable brain tumor? Is that possible?”

He sighed and dumped his celery into the buttery sauté pan. “Oh, yeah. Money grubbing children.”

“What?”

“Kate, I’m a relatively wealthy man. Not filthy stinking rich, but fifteen or twenty million. Only with money comes responsibility. I pay a generous alimony and I supported my children and offered to pay for most of their college, but I think if my kids got hold of it all, it would be spent on exotic race cars and gambling. I have generous life insurance that will go to my ex wife and kids, but there are better things to be done with the rest. What do you think my kids are going to do when they find out I’m brain dead and leaving my wealth to a foundation instead of to them?”

“John, fifteen or twenty million
is
filthy stinking rich. You really think your children are going to try to fight you?”

“They’ve already started. I have no idea how they even found out I’m liquidating assets. They’ve never shown the slightest interest in working at one of these places. When they find out I’ll eventually be deemed mentally incompetent, they’ll come like three vultures.”

She nudged his arm with hers. “That’s a horrible way to talk about your children. I thought you said you only had two.”
 

“I do. The ex is bound to come running as well.”

“Oh, my. So what can I do to head off the vultures, more than manage your restaurants?”

“Uh, would you like to sit down, while I suggest this?”

Kate looked at him and her eyes got big and she went around and sat at his kitchen desk. “Okay. I’m ready.”

“Kate, I want you to marry me and have joint power of attorney with Mark and have you be the executor of my trust until the foundation is all locked up and untouchable. You’d also be the person over my living will so they don’t pull the plug while I’m still around or leave me plugged in past when I ought to go.” He watched her for a second and then put out a hand. “And don’t worry, I’m not asking for any kind of a marital relationship except that you see that I’m kept as comfortable as possible. It shouldn’t take long at the end. The tumor is destroying the part of my brain that controls my heart and lungs.”

If Kate hadn’t been sitting down, she would have fainted. She sat there for a minute, her mind racing, trying to figure out exactly what he was asking. Finally, she asked, “Couldn’t you simply get an attorney to keep them from you and what’s yours until it’s irrevocable? Why would a wife be anymore in control than that?”

“Theoretically, an attorney would be untouchable, but I don’t want to chance it. Once I am deemed mentally incompetent, I think they’d try to come in as next of kin and rearrange things.”

“Why me? You hardly know me and I’m only twenty years old. Surely there are more mature, educated people who could do a better job.”

“Two reasons, Kate. One is that yes, I do trust you after working with you these last months. And that working relationship will hold up in court better than if I’d just marry someone I hadn’t been around much. Especially after having been diagnosed. They still may fight you, but any lucid judge could meet you for ten minutes and realize you’re the real deal. Not some woman looking for a sugar daddy. The fact that the money won’t be coming to you will help as well.

“And secondly, your son. He needs a name, and right now, you can never go home without running the risk of losing custody of him until he’s eighteen years old. Your parents will be old by then. Your sister and you will have grown clear apart. And he needs grandparents and cousins and the whole bit. If you get married now, for just a short time you can go home and your Jason won’t know your son isn’t mine. Your husband who passed away. You’ll still be able to remarry respectably because you will have been widowed, not divorced. It all works, Kate.”

He went on without a pause, “And I know you’re still in love with Jason Falcon. That’s okay. If you still want to go back to him someday, you can. You can tell him we weren’t ever lovers, just good friends who helped each other when things were tough. Business partners.”

He’d been waving his knife around while he spoke and he finally put it down and came to stand beside her. “I don’t want you to answer me right now, Kate. I want you to go back to the hotel and think about it and pray about it at least over night. If you think it works, fine, we’ll get married. If not, we’ll still be fine to finish what we’ve started with overhauling the restaurants, and we’ll go to plan B.”

“Which is?”

“I’ll stick with that attorney you were talking about and try to make an airtight trust my kids can’t crack. And I’ll die alone.”

Kate continued to sit there in his kitchen chair in silence and then got up and went back to the counter and picked up her own chef’s knife. After a moment, she said, “Y’all do know how to spice up a holiday. I think I’ll take you up on thinking about this over night. Now where is that other sweet Vidalia onion?”

                                          ***

Jason slept in on Thanksgiving morning and then got up and got himself a bowl of Cheerios and took it to the coffee table in front of the TV. He prayed over the cold cereal and began to eat and then decided to pray over it again. After all, it was Thanksgiving and in spite of the fact that without Kate, his life didn’t have much meaning, he had a lot to be thankful for.

He crunched into another bite, clicked on the remote and flipped through the channels as he ate. There was nothing that looked terribly interesting except maybe the bass fishing tournament and when he finished eating, he clicked the TV back off. His mother wasn’t going to have dinner for another four hours, but he decided to go up to their house now anyway. He could use their unconditional support and this time he wouldn’t have to find an excuse to visit.

Pulling in, he sat and looked at the empty spot on Kate’s parents’ driveway where she used to park her car and wondered where she was today. That’s probably why he wanted to come up early. He’d been hoping Kate would come home today. Wasn’t Thanksgiving supposed to be more of a family gathering holiday than any other? Even than Christmas? But her car wasn’t there. At least not yet. Maybe she would still show up. It wasn’t even noon yet.

He walked into his mother’s kitchen and gave her a long hug. She pulled back after a minute to look at him critically and he grinned at her. “I know, I know. Cody has already told me I look awful. That wasn’t his exact wording, but I think that’s what he meant.” He dug into a drawer and pulled out one of his grandmother’s huge, full length, flowered aprons and strapped it on while his mom still watched him. “Ok, I’m ready. Give me a job.”

His mother handed him a pair of white surgical gloves. “Here, you’d better have these too. They’ll go perfect with the outfit. Would you mind taking everything out of that turkey and rinsing it and then putting the stuffing back in?”