Falling Stars (49 page)

"So
when is the little guy, or girl, coming?" He asked with forced enthusiasm.

"Mid
June," I sighed.

He
patted my back and stood up. We said good-bye and I left knowing my dad had had
his fill of emotional outbursts and talks. It wasn't within his comfort zone.

Driving
a little longer, I came across the sign for Sunlight Beach. Still not wanting
to return to the reality waiting for me at the house, I drove down to the empty
parking lot, got out of the car, and walked down the wet cold beach. Typically,
I hated the beach when it was cold, but I needed the walk. The sound of the
waves was soothing.

Spotting
a large washed up tree trunk; I pulled my coat further over my butt and sat
down beside it. Leaning back, I looked out over the water. The sound of the
waves crashing and the rocks rubbing together lulled me into an almost
meditative state. All I could hear was the water and the splashes. It was a
welcome change from all the craziness that had been going on for the last week.
I got lost in my own thoughts.

Was
I ready to be someone's mother? Was I really going to do this with Chris? Could
he handle this? Could I handle him? Would I be a good enough mother? I've never
even considered having kids. It wasn't something I'd seen for myself, but here
I am. I'd agreed to do this. Was it the right thing to do? Had he been serious
about marriage? He couldn't think it was really a good idea.

"Mia?

I
hoped I was imagining it.

 "MIA?"
My eyes snapped open when hands picked me up.

"What
the heck?" When my eyes focused on Christopher, I relaxed. "Shit!
What are you doing?"

"I-I
found your car but couldn't find you. Then when I saw you…you didn't answer me,"
his hands were on each side of my face. He was staring intently at me. "Are
you okay?" I nodded and tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let me. He
pulled me into his chest. "I'm sorry about this morning, I just…it…it hurt
..."

I
pushed away.

"I
came here to be alone for a while. I needed some personal space," I
mumbled heading toward my truck.

"Mia,
wait," he pleaded. I stopped and exhaled noisily.

"What?"
Keeping my back to him, I closed my eyes.

"I'm
sorry." His arms wrapped around me. One around my waist the other around
my shoulders, he pressed my back against him.

"I
realize things are hard for you Chris, but you don't just get to be an asshole
and me be okay about it. Your temper is too much sometimes." I took a deep
breath.

"I
know," he said calmly, too calmly. I turned around to look at him. "What?"
he asked.

"Nothing,"
I mumbled and headed toward my truck again.

I
was trying to avoid arguing or being bitchy, but it was getting more and more
difficult to control my emotions. Personal space seemed to work best. It didn't
work for Christopher who was at my side quickly with his hands in his pockets
and his head down.

"You're
still mad at me?" He asked quietly.

"Yep,"
I said shortly.

"What
can I –?"

"There
is nothing you can do Chris. You've done enough. Just because you completely caught
me off guard, by your ridiculous proposal of marriage, you decide to storm off
like a five year old and I'm still pissed about it. Leave it alone and I'll
just get over it by myself." Pausing, I saw the same hurt and angry
expression on his face. "Go ahead run away," I spat. I reached for
the handle of my truck door.

As
I pulled it open, he pushed it shut and leaned against it so I couldn't open
the door again.

"Damn
it Christopher…" his lips cut me off. He kissed me firmly and then pulled
back.

"I
love you and I'm sorry," he looked deeply into my eyes. "I'm not the
only one who runs away." He walked to his rental car.

Growling
to myself, I threw myself into the car. I crossed my arms over my chest and
pouted.

"Stupid
guy…stupid hot guy…jerk…asshole with super sperm…pathetic cry baby…jerk…"

After
my pouting, I started the car and drove home, Christopher closely following me.
Marc waved at me when I passed the security gate.

Richard's
car was gone. Before I could open my door, Christopher had it open. I pointed
at him and narrowed my eyes.

"Stop
being nice to me!"

He
smirked.

"Stop
it. I want to be mad at you right now!" I stomped away, but could hear him
chuckling from behind me. "And quit smirking. I hate that damn smirk!"

Entering
the house the first things I saw were Jackson, Elliott and Ryan in front of the
television together playing Mario Kart. All three of them tilting with the
turns and leaning forward when they would speed up.

"Where
is everyone?" I stepped toward the three 'kids' on the floor.

"Upstairs
with Kat," Elliott chuckled.

Turning
around, Christopher was right behind me. I narrowed my eyes at his smirk and
pushed past him.

Kat's
voice was the first thing I heard when I got to the top of the steps. Slowly I
made my way toward her room.

"Jesus
Christ! It's nothing…just drop it." Kat was yelling.

"Nothing?
Are you kidding me?" Laney almost laughed. "You've been fucking
Richard? Seriously?" she was stifling laughter now.

"Shut
up, Laney!" Kat glared.

"But
isn't he like sixty or something?" Laney laughed louder. "Can he
still get it up on his own or does he need –?"

"Laney,"
Kat shouted and glared at her.

Serena
stood quietly leaning against the wall. I nudged her when I entered and mouthed
'what the hell?' she smirked.

"It
seems that our Katherine here has been seeing the owner of our record label and
sleeping with him." Serena sneered, clearly unhappy about it.

"What?"
I gasped and looked at Kat.

"Don't
give me that look," Kat warned.

"So
how and when did this happen?" I asked lying down on her bed.

"It's
no one's business and I'm not talking about it," she huffed and threw
herself back on her bed.

"Alright,
alright…" I put my hands up. "I think we should just leave it alone."

Laney
and Serena shrugged heading out the door.

"Don't
fuck things up for us, Kat." Serena snapped before walking out.

Kat
flipped her off. I chuckled.

"You
okay?" I asked. She nodded. "Okay then…well if you need to talk just
let me know." I patted her back and started to stand.

"He
said he's in love with me," she whispered.

I
sat back down.

"Oh…and
you don't want that?" I asked biting my lip.

She
shrugged.

"It's
complicated." I knew that would be all I would get out of Kat. All I could
do was hug and then leave her alone.

Suddenly
a wave of exhaustion hit me. I drug myself to my room. Kicking off my shoes, I
slid off my jeans, pulled my sweatshirt off before I climbed into bed. It didn't
take long for me to fall into a deep sleep.

'Mia.
Mia dear.'

'Mom!'
I
sat up quickly and saw my mother looking down at me from the side of my bed.

I
looked around. It was my room.

'Mom…you're….'

'Shhh
baby' she rubbed my head. Her hands went to my stomach 'You will do wonderful.'
She smiled and I closed my eyes as she leaned forward and kissed my forehead. 'Baby
mine...' she began to sing.

When
I opened my eyes, back up she was gone.

I
jumped from my bed and started to look around. I dropped to my knees in tears.

"Mia?
Mia, please wake up?" I could hear his voice, but didn't understand.

My
eyes fluttered open, my body tensed and a shudder ripped through my body.

"Are
you okay?" Christopher's voice was full of worry.

Nodding
I rolled into my pillow.

"I'm
so sorry…please. I don't think I can…"

Rolling
over, I looked at him. One look into his eyes, I reached my hand to the back of
his head and pulled his face to mine.

I
pressed my lips to his. My tongue grazed his lip piercing as I sought entrance.
His mouth opened and he started to consume me. A deep moan escaped my mouth
when he pressed his body against me. His appreciation was prominent against my
thigh.

His
hands slid down my body. I could feel the smile spread across his lips when he
realized I wasn't wearing pants. Rubbing my thigh, softly massaging, he locked
onto my hip and squeezed.

One
hand slid over my stomach until he reached my breast. I moaned into his mouth
and my body squirmed with need. Quickly my shirt was over my head and my bra
was on the floor. I worked to get his pants off him.

Settling
between my legs – with only our underwear between us – I pressed my hips
forward, rubbing against him. He moaned my name causing vibrations on my tender
skin.

"Oh
god, Chris," I moved faster against him.

He
kissed up over my breast and back to my neck. Lightly biting on my collarbone,
I pressed my hips up harder needing more. He moaned.

"If
you keep doing that, I'm not going to be able to contain myself any longer."
I did it again and he grabbed my hips firmly. "Mia," he warned
looking up at the grin on my face.

*
* * * *

I
slid my hand under her chin, turning her head to look at me.

"I'm
completely in love with you Mia. I want this." Holding her tighter to will
her to understand, to make her believe. "I want this." Moving my hand
from her face to her stomach, "But you have to want it too," I shut
my eyes, "and if you don't, then I will…I'll try to understand."
Sighing again, I pressed my lips to her shoulder. Her skin was warm and soft.

She
rolled back and slid her hand over the side of my face. Turning my face toward
her palm, I kissed it. She took a deep breath before she spoke.

"I'm
just…so confused, scared, worried, unsure…" she sighed. “It’s just a lot
to take in."

She
started to turn away from me again, but I stopped her. Instead, I rolled to my
back, taking her with me. Holding her against me, she laid her head in the
crook of my shoulder. Grabbing her hand, I placed it on my chest, covering it
with mine. I needed to make her understand, make her believe, and for her to
feel all I was feeling.

"Do
you feel it?" I wasn't sure if she would hear me.

"Feel
what?"

"It,"
I squeezed her hand "The pulse, the feeling flowing between us, do you
feel it too, or is it just me?"

She
tensed up and then nodded. I released a breath in relief.

"I've
never felt this way, this connected before." Rolling to my side, I slid
down so we were face to face. "I don't know what it's like for you, but
for me it's healing. I realize it was all…unexpected, but I don't want it any
other way. You mean more to me than you realize."

She
tried to roll away again, but I held tight. I wasn't ready for her to pull
away. She needed to understand what she meant to me.

"Don't
pull away from me, please," I begged. "I need you to understand you
aren't just some 'person' in my life. You are the person in my life."

Watching
a range of emotions pass in her eyes, I waited with baited breath for her to
say something, anything. When her lips pressed against mine, my brain said to
stop and finish talking to her, but my heart told me to show her.

I
rolled onto her and slowly moved my lips to her cheek and jaw. Lightly, I
kissed the flesh of her neck and planted loving kisses on her collarbone.
Sliding my right hand down the side of her body, I lifted her left leg and
positioned myself between her legs.

To
keep from devouring her body, I moved with slow loving movements, reveling in
each inch of her. Her head tilted back as I moved my kisses between the valley
of her breasts and a small gasp escaped her lips as my hand lightly rubbed over
her taut nipple.

I
continued my path trailing kisses over her body, going over her stomach and on
each hipbone before I slid my nose over the skin of her inner thigh. Her scent
was almost too much. Images of ravaging her flooded my head. I fought an inner
battle to keep the slow pace.

Stopping
at the inside of her knee, I kissed lightly and moved back up until I reached
her center. Mia's breathing was heavy and she was squirming under my mouth,
making it more difficult for me to control myself. I placed a featherweight
kiss on her lower lips before slipping my tongue inside.

"Oh
God," she growled and pressed her hips forward. "Hughh…ohhh…"