Far-out Show (9781465735829) (38 page)

During that Ackack, taken a bit by surprise,
had lowered his head so his expression wouldn’t give away his
confused and near panic thoughts. Gopgop and Uldene exchanged quick
glances, then each of them lowered his head so he wouldn’t
broadcast his concerns and thoughts until he had reached a solid
decision about how to proceed. Each felt that this topic needed to
be dealt with but had been reluctant to be the one to bring it up
in case his partner denied his own admission or the others denied
having any involvement with the secret zerpy.

There was a long silence. Delmus looked from
one lowered head to the other and worried that he had done the
right thing and ruined himself in business as a result.

Gopgop looked up, raised his chin to show he
was proud to do what needed to be done, and said, “Yeah, we control
part of the zerpy Foxpat put aboard and we’ve been thinking the
same thing. That it’d be worth the loss of whatever control we
still have to remove a possible cause of their technical
problems.”

Uldene and Ackack both looked up but
struggled not to show any emotion or reaction. This admission
probably needed to be made but it was important to stay aloof so
they could claim to have been forced into this exposure and
concession against their better judgments if this didn’t help. Not
that either believed making that claim would have any effect on his
partner or other business guys but it felt right to cover their
backends.

“We can talk-talk about what your part or our
part of the device is or isn’t doing and if each could turn off
only certain parts of it,” Delmus said. “What we’ve heard about
what’s going on the far side of the snaggiewarp means that time is
running out fast though. Will you promptly shut down your entire
part of that zerpy – and actually do it?”

Uldene prepared his objections and
qualifications to be voiced before the others could respond.

Ackack prepared his objections and
qualifications to be voiced before anything more was said by
anyone.

Gopgop said, “Yeah, we’ll do that if you
will. It’s not worth the risk of losing everything by losing them
and ending up on the bad side of the governors because we didn’t do
what we could to salvage things.”

“Now wait,” Uldene said. “The governors don’t
know...”

Ackack cut him off. “Weren’t you awake when
we had a surprise visitor the last time we met here? We don’t know
what and how much they know so it’s safest to assume they know
almost everything.”

“So we agree to turn off our part of the
secret zerpy as soon as we can get to our offices?” Delmus asked to
make this definite.

“We can talk about how to deal with Foxpat at
a later time since his technology might be the cause of this
problem,” Uldene said. It felt good to have a target for the
aggression he was feeling but didn’t dare to focus on the nearby
three targets.

“We can consider that when and if we’re more
certain than I am right now that he doesn’t have special governors’
protection,” Ackack said. It felt good to be able to verbally slap
back at somebody to relieve some frustration.

“The new threats to the ship and its crew,
not just to a single contestant on the planet, call for rethinking
a lot of stuff but in the meantime we have a restless population to
pacify. Now, do we tell the audience about the capture or
destruction of the ship and our other hardware?” Delmus asked.
“It’s our decision at A.D.U. but I’m interested in your opinions
since you Peepees are part of the overall business.”

Ackack turned and stepped away to collect his
thoughts.

Gopgop said, “Can you maybe make these new
threats the basis of a new show to drag it out? It is a different
slant than the contest show and it’s full of real threat and real
danger of real violence. That should make it a crowd pleaser.”

“Or show the earth creatures’ porno with lots
of commentary to distract the masses until this other mess resolves
enough that you can at least fake some filler to extend that Nerber
story line,” Uldene suggested. “Oh yeah, right. That is if you
really have that alien porno. We heard a rumor that you do.”

Ackack made his decision. He tapped a code
into his handheld device, then put that back in his pocket. The
signal to activate and detonate the ship’s self-destruct unit was
on its way with no chance to stop it. That was a final resolution
he could live with. Too bad about those on the good ship
Whizybeam
but this was business.

* * *

Gopgop and Uldene rushed into the Power
Players office, plopped down at the control console, and started
pushing buttons and keying in commands.

Uldene said, “Being out of touch for security
reasons still means you can't do what needs doing
fastest-most.”

“I'm on it,” Gopgop assured him. “Our part of
A.D.U. will be for sale to anyone with money to throw away in just
two minutes. Before everyone learns the show and therefore the
company are going stinko.”

“I'm warning the governors that the
contestant went into hiding but still may be found and cut up. This
means Earth's too dangerous to visit again so forget about
colonizing it. They won't like that news but they'll appreciate the
quiet alert. It’s always good to have them appreciate your
help.”

“Tell them we support A.D.U. using the
remotely controlled self-destruct units to keep the guys and
hardware away from the aliens but we can't be certain they sent
those signals and especially have no way of knowing if that
worked.”

“The audience won't care that the contestants
got blown up, only that they didn't get to watch it happen,” Uldene
said. “When I get a few free minutes I’ll mourn for the great show
and the even greater benefits for us that might have been, but to
me this kind of show seems done for for now and at least the
immediate future.”

“The masses will have to settle for a new
generation of faked shows about Ormelexians having adventures in
far places. It'll be the new hot genre so they won't have much else
to watch,” Gopgop said.

“If only I could shake the nagging doubts
that this is an elaborate fake and we’re the ones being played
instead of those pulling it off.”

“I can’t give you any guarantees about that
but my analysis of the evidence says get clear of this or we’ll get
sucked down and maybe even under. I’m signaling all those who need
to know that we’re immediately and totally cutting all ties with
Bang-Boom Shows Certificated
. Also that we’ve rethought our
plans and are no longer interested in owning more control of the
Amuse and Distract U company. I don’t need to spell out to these
guys that we now think that company’s going to be a loser.”

“I’m letting those who need to know what’s
happening that we’re advising the governors that our earlier
assurances were in error, the planet its inhabitants call Earth is
too dangerous to visit again. I don’t need to spell out to these
guys that our analysis of the suitability of the place for
colonization was based on information provided to us through the
governors,” Uldene said as he dispatched messages.

“What’s your take on this contestant Nerber
now that we’ve learned more about him?”

“He’s clever, devious, and possibly
unbalanced in his head. He’d be a fierce business competitor but so
far there’s no sign he’s going to survive or that he’d go into
business if he does,” Uldene answered. “The bottom-most lineage is
that I don’t see him being able to pull off any action that will be
useful to us. He might be convenient though if we can blame the
loss of the ship and all the opportunity for appeasement of the
masses – not to mention profit for us – on him. Maybe we can back a
company that makes an entertainment series about how this one guy
with a super zerpy could take over a whole planned show and cause
disaster by being greedy and stupid but exciting to watch.”

“Now that we know there are few secrets from
the governors I can’t stop wondering if Nerber, or whoever he
really is, has connections there. There’s speculation about a zerpy
he must have to do what he’s done. I keep thinking Sproingy and
wondering if he’s connected to the top secret device development
supported by the governors. Is he a lot smarter about tech stuff
than we were led to think? And if so who misled us, the A.D.U. guys
or the contestant himself? For me a bottom-most lineage is that if
he survives and makes it back I should be first in line to maybe go
into business with him,” Gopgop said.

“Whatever it takes to wring the maximum
profit from him.”

They looked up at a signal tone. Uldene
checked a monitor then said, “Our techs confirm that the A.D.U.
guys have told the governors that they sent the self-destruct
signal to the ship to, as they put it, ‘get rid of an embarrassing
problem’.”

“It was the best way to sidestep a mess of
messes,” Gopgop agrees. “I’m okay with letting those guys present
their planned defense if it all goes public. It was a fraud
perpetrated against them and the guys of Ormelex. There was no
space ship to a far planet and no actual contact with alien
creatures. Some small and isolated group too out of it to defend
themselves before they’re publicly executed and their belonging
destroyed so no one can check what they had done will be blamed.
That assumes of course that no one who went through the snaggiewarp
survives and gets back. Messages can be denied and covered up, a
living testifier is more of a problem although far from convincing
no matter how much supposed evidence he has.”

“It also assumes that the governors would
allow those involved to make such a defense explanation. I’m so
paranoid after what I’ve learned today that my thinking part is
swirling around inside my head with worries and possibilities. If
the contestant was their guy there might need to be new
claims.”

They looked up at a signal tone. Uldene
checked the monitor in the console and said, “Our spy inside A.D.U.
reports that they’ve lost all contact with the ship and that the
last signals they received strongly suggest that the ship’s
self-destruct unit detonated which would mean everyone was lost.
There is of course no way to confirm that since everything was
destroyed.”

“So that ends an interesting but chaotic
chapter in Ormelexian history and business,” Gopgop said, sitting
back in his chair. “At least that tension’s over. It’ll take a
while for all the other potential problems to come together so they
become evident but also can be dealt with.”

“After all the twists and turnings I’m not
going to say that’s all over but I agree that it may be best if it
is. At least until we hear some definite word to the contrary I’ll
focus my superior mind on covering my backend - and thinking about
how to use what we learned for new investment opportunities. A bit
of relaxation is also called for.”

“I’ve summoned Elfwip and told him to bring
two assistants. We need a lot of worrying done and I’m tired. It’s
good to be rich enough to hire help for these tasks,” Gopgop
said.

“I’m going to bask for a while, then I’ll
start thinking about more new and inventive ways to amass profits.
I know my place in the scheme of things. I’m content to be a
business person. That’s enough of a challenge for me,” Uldene
said.

* * *

So that is basically the way things happened
on the distant planet Ormelex far away and reached in less than
thousands of years only by way of, to use its Earth scientist’s
high tech name for it, a space
wormhole
. Not surprisingly,
those from Ormelex working on the Earth side of that
wormhole
aka snaggiewarp had a different perspective on the
events.

From an early stage of the adventure it
happened like this on
Whizybeam
, the space ship from
Ormelex, that was in stationary orbit beside and close to Earth’s
moon

The ship was specially outfitted as a really
far-ranging mobile message reception, processing, and transmission
center so she was effectively a fast-moving, far-traveling TV show
production station.

The producers’ office was a fairly small room
in keeping with the inevitable cramped conditions on a small
spaceship. There was a view-screen and control console on one side.
Two doors, both currently and routinely closed, provided access to
the rest of the ship. The decor was basic
Star Trek
type,
light on detail but durable and easy to maintain. At this time the
producers Hasley, Feedle, and Lacrat sat in a circle in roll-around
swivel chairs, all happy and feeling a bit playful.

“Show runner Feedle reporting that we've made
more history. We've sent home the first show episode ever made on,
and edited from orbit over, a planet beyond Ormelex's star
system.”

“Making the best use we can of the contestant
prepared for the task by our lovely talent coordinator, me,” Lacrat
noted.

“While as chief schemer and diplomatic bully
of the onboard team of
Bang-Boom Shows Certificated
major
players I handle the delicate task of coordinating with those far,
far away back home,” Hasley proudly proclaimed.

“I'd take a bow but it's too much trouble to
get up for such a small if distinguished audience as this,” Feedle
said.

“The first packet of edited material is on
its way and I'm worried that it'll be too big a hit among the
masses,” Lacrat admitted. “This isn't going as planned so we'd be
better off with only a moderate success this time.
That
level of expectations we could meet.”

“I'm shaping and stretching what we have into
as exciting and long-lasting a show as possible but it's a strain
without a real contest,” Feedle said. “See what you think of
this.”

She started the sequence on the view-screen.
The image was a close-up view of Nerber, from his zerpy’s
perspective, as he cautiously but curiously examined Matt Taylor’s
newspaper. The voice-over was a synthesized version of Nerber’s
voice, not too artificial sounding but not entirely convincing
either.