Finding Harmony (14 page)

I shuffled in my bed, trying to sit up as I looked on at the scene before me, slightly perplexed.

“Oh thank God, you’re awake!” Freddy sprang out of his chair and rushed to my side, flashing me his pearly whites and puppy dog eyes.

Before I could even respond Trey was at my other side, his face lit up brighter than a Christmas tree. He took my hand in his and linked our fingers whilst mouthing “I love you”.

“How are you feeling? Do you want me to call a nurse?” Freddy fussed as he fluffed my pillow whilst my head and body were temporarily raised from the bed.

“Maybe you should lie back down, Harmony, you don’t look so good, and I’ll get the nurse.” Trey tried to gently push me back down to the bed, but I sat up straight, defiant and confused.

“W-where am I-I? What h-happened?”

Both the twins exchanged saddened glances before Trey sat down on the edge of the bed, once again taking my hand in his. He took in a deep breath whilst tenderly stroking the back of my hand.

“Don’t you remember, Harmony? You… you were shot…”

The words caught in Trey’s throat, as if it were painful for him to say them out loud. I could swear I saw a glistening tear stream down his cheek but he turned his head from me too quickly for me to get a proper look.

Clearly this wasn’t easy for Trey to tell me so Freddy took over, sitting next to me on the other side of the bed and carefully pushing some loose strands of hair behind my ear.

“You lost a lot of blood, Harmony, you needed an immediate blood transfusion… You’ve been out of it for the past five days… the doctors said that you weren’t going to make it.”

I looked at Freddy’s distressed face both in shock and bewilderment.

And then it hit me. The most incredulous pain I’d ever felt soared through my veins like fire, gnawing away to the very marrow of my bones. My whole body throbbed and ached, I felt like I’d been hit by a Double Decker bus.

I looked down to see the discolored yellow bruises lining my arms in random bundles, a thick band of skin that looked as though it had been rubbed raw wrapped around each of my wrists, slowly starting to heal over. I moved my hands and felt around my abdomen to find my torso securely bandaged up.

So it wasn’t just some gruesome nightmare, it actually happened. The events which had caused me to be put in this place played out in perfect sequence within the confines of my mind, the beatings, the rape, the shooting. I shuddered at the remembrance of the atrocities which had taken place merely days ago.

I looked back at Freddy and then Trey to see them wearing matching faces of concern and heartache. And somehow, I knew that they had found the peace I had found. Or, more accurately, the Peace that had found me. I did the only thing my body would allow me to do. I cried, quietly thanking God. Trey wrapped his arms around me and I didn’t care that it hurt; I needed to feel close to someone right now. I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck and sobbed as he gently rocked me in his arms, and I could swear, he was crying with me.

Chapter Twenty

Only two days later, Harmony was discharged from the hospital. The doctors said she had defied the laws of logic, that she should’ve been dead…God must keeping an eye out for her.

Freddy and I took her back to our apartment; I couldn’t stand not being near her. The first night we were back at home, we fell asleep entangled in each others arms on my bed. I was determined to never let anything happen to her ever again. From now on, I was going to take care of her, the way I always should have.

I wake up the next morning feeling awful, having slept uneasy for most of the night. I start panicking when I find a pillow in my arms instead of Harmony. Immediately I sit up, only to find Harmony perched on the end of the bed, her back turned to me and head hanging low. I reach out to touch her arm, only for her to flinch away from me and stand to her feet. A small part of me dies inside when she cringes away from my touch.

“Harmony…”

“I’m going for a shower.”

Her voice is barely more than a whisper. A weak broken whisper. My heart aches for her, to hold her and comfort her but she simply shrinks away from me. She opens the bedroom door and walks down the hall towards the bathroom. I follow her, wanting to make sure she’s okay but when I reach the bathroom she slams the door in my face and turns the lock. I shut my eyes and lean against the wooden door, my soul crying out, for with this simple locking of the door, Harmony locked me out of her life. Completely.

The whole morning passes and Harmony is still locked away in the bathroom. I start to worry, what could she possibly be doing in there? Would she hurt herself? I hate the fact she’s locked me out, I have no idea if she’s alright or what to do, she’s never acted this way towards me before.

Eventually, around lunch time, Harmony makes an appearance and exits the bathroom. She sulks into the bedroom, still shielding her face from me. I slowly get up up off the bed, trying not to doing anything that might send her running back for the bathroom again.

“I can get you something to eat if you like? You must be starving?”

She shifts uncomfortably on the spot, her eyes glued to the ground and still not bothering to talk to me.

I take her silence as a yes and slip out of the bedroom to fetch her some food. However, the very instant I’m out of the room, the door is quickly rushed shut behind me and once again the lock turned. I slide down the wall and sit crouched down on the carpeted floor in the hall. I run a clammy, frustrated hand through my tousled hair. I know she’s been through a lot and she probably needs some space, some time to herself so that she can collect her thoughts and however reluctant I may be to give her that space; I know that I have to abide by her wishes.

But when I hear those heart-wrenching whimpers of a tortured soul from within the bedroom, it takes everything in me not to break the door down to get to her.

I make my way to the living room and slump down on the sofa next to Freddy, holding me head in my hands.

“How’s she holding up?” Freddy asks whilst placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. I lean back into the sofa and let out a frustrated sigh.

“She’s not even talking to me, Freddy; I don’t know what to do.”

“She knows you’re here for her, Trey, and when she’s ready to come out and open up, she will…”

Freddy was right. I just had to be patient and wait for her. I’d wait forever if I had to. I wasn’t going to lose Harmony. No matter what it took, I was going to fix her, I was going to make things better again.

Chapter Twenty-one

              I pulled the huge fluffy blanket up and wrapped it snugly around me as I let myself fall back into the mound of plush feather pillows which lay beneath me. I felt so comfortable lying here with Trey’s sweet intoxicating smell radiating off the bed on which I lay and smothering me in its musky goodness. I was definitely the most relaxed I’d been in days.

My eyelids quickly dropped; however, the slumber I so desperately wanted didn’t follow. I hadn’t slept properly since I’d been released from the hospital. I tried so hard not to think about it but the fact was Miranda was still out there somewhere. And as long as she was out prowling the midnight streets, there’s no way I’d be able to sleep easy at night.

But I knew there were other reasons behind my sleep deprivation. Mostly it came down to the thousands of thoughts that swirled around relentlessly in my head every time I closed my eyes. I still hadn’t spoken to Trey at all. I felt guilty; after all, had it not been for Trey then I’d most certainly be dead in a ditch right about now. The guy saved my life and I didn’t even have the decency to hold a proper conversation with him... I don’t know why I couldn’t bring myself to face him, it just felt awkward. Every time his eyes burned into me with the utmost worry and concern, all I wanted to do was run away and hide.

I didn’t want him to see me like this. The fading yellowish bruises still lined my arms, the cuts and scratches were still visible, the fear and panic still resided in my eyes and in my movements. Every finger they had laid on me was still visible, slapped right across my body for the whole world to see. I didn’t want Trey to see what they’d done to me, he needn’t concern himself with the all the gory details, it would only aggravate him more.

I wanted to talk to him so desperately, to put his mind at ease and tell him myself that I was holding up okay. But I knew that with one look into his pleading big brown eyes, I’d crack. I’d fall to pieces right there in front of him. I didn’t want him to see me cry, I didn’t want him to know how broken and worn out I really was. I’d already caused him so much grief, the last thing I wanted was to burden him even more with my extreme pathetic-ness and unruly emotions.

Unable to talk to Trey, the only other person I had to turn to was Freddy. He’d been so amazingly supportive throughout this whole ordeal, I owed him a lot. Because he wasn’t so connected to the whole ‘Miranda thing’ I guess in a way, it made it easier for me to talk to him. He didn’t push me for answers, in fact most of the time I’d just sit and listen to him ramble on about the embarrassing things he’d done to George over the years. It made me laugh, hearing all his hilarious anecdotes.

I suppose, in a way, being with Freddy was my way of escaping the real world. His carefree attitude was contagious and when I’m with him, it’s like I totally forget about everything that’s happened lately.

I know me running to Freddy for comfort wasn’t something that pleased Trey. I’d heard the pair of them arguing about it on more than one occasion when they thought I was asleep. Whenever Trey came home to see me and Freddy cuddling together on the sofa, I could almost see his eyes turn green with jealousy. Sometimes when Freddy came in to check on me during the night, I’d ask him to stay with me. I know it was wrong and I know it hurt Trey, but Freddy was the one who made me feel safe right now. When I build up the strength and courage to talk to Trey, I’ll tell him everything he wants to know, but in the meantime, all I can do is hope that he understands.

Chapter Twenty-two

I closed the door behind me as gently as I could with the back of my foot; my keys were clenched between my teeth and my arms full with bags of shopping. I shuffled over to the kitchen and placed the bags on the countertop. The apartment was awfully quiet, but then again, it was always quiet lately. The only real sounds these days came from the TV or the melodic notes of Freddy’s guitar escaping underneath the crack in his door.

The apartment itself was lifeless. I knew how much Harmony hated mess so I made an extra effort to keep the place looking clean and tidy. Not that it mattered much right enough, she mostly stayed in the bedroom, occasionally she’d venture out into the living room but that only really happened when Freddy was around. In the grand old scheme of things, I guess a clean apartment was the least of her worries right now.