Finding Solace (12 page)

 
Colt walked
over and sat down on the bed facing me.

 
"Sadie,
does it bother you that..?”

 
“Stop!
The point was for you to know that I understand the
arrangement here. I'm not some clueless girl. I've had my fair share of sex
with
.."

 
"You
stop. First, you didn't let me finish. I wasn't going to talk about the parts
of my life you’re not involved in. I was asking if it bothers you that we seem
to be getting close. If I'm confusing you, I'm sorry. As for you being
clueless, I have never thought you were anything less than perfect. But let’s
make something clear right now. I don't want to know what is happening when I'm
not with you either,
understand
?"

 
As he talked,
I pulled my arms through the dress and started to wrap the sides. Colt took the
ties and secured them for me. By the time he was finished talking, I was
dressed and ready to go. I leaned down and got so close to his lips I'm sure he
thought I was going to kiss him.

 
But instead,
I said, "Understood."

CHAPTER
16

 
It
almost seemed like Heather was avoiding me. I wasn’t having that, so I made her
promise me she wouldn’t make plans tonight. I even went to the grocery store
and bought everything I needed to make my mother’s famous spaghetti. I have
been cooking the sauce for the last two hours and it was finally time to cook
the pasta and bread. As I was placing the angel hair into the boiling water,
the front door opened. She was home and I was ready for the interrogation to
begin. She walked in the kitchen, set her purse down and went to the fridge to
grab a beer. Beer and other alcohol could be stocked in our apartment easily
now, being Heather turned twenty one three weeks before I was going to, which
is tomorrow. I tried to plan a huge party for her, or at least a small get
together with our friends, but she was always either working or too busy. At
least, that is what she told me. See, I am not paranoid. I really do think she
was avoiding me.

 
"Hey,
chica
!
I hope you’re
hungry. I made a ton of sauce. We will have left overs for weeks."

 
"Sadie,
you’re awesome. You know how much I love your mom’s spaghetti."

 
I drained
the pasta. Then I put the bread in the oven under the broiler. Just a few more
minutes and we could eat. Heather sat down at the table and let out and
exhausted sigh.

 
"I'm so
tired. I feel like this is the first time I've sat down in forever."

 
"I can
understand that. Feels like forever since I've seen you, other than the coming
and goings of our regular day."

 
The timer
went off which meant the bread was done. I pulled it out, sliced it and started
to make the plates. I walked over with them both placing one in front of her
and taking a seat myself. And that's when I lost it.

 
"Heather,
what have I done? If it’s that I haven't been able to be here for you, then
that makes me feel like the worst friend of all. You have been there for me
through everything I had to put up with James, me trying to get past it, well
you know, it was a whole lot of shit. But now, I feel like you won't let me return
the favor."

 
"Oh
Sadie, that's not it at all. It’s just all been one big cluster fuck. Do you
remember the morning after everything happened when Jason was here? Well, at
first he was all like, Heather, I'm so sorry I overreacted, I'm so glad to hear
that nothing happened, I love you and I want to make this work. He even told me
about the ring! Then at the hospital he told me police had been to his house
and wanted him to come in for questioning. Now he's blaming me for everything
again. You know his brother, Tony, is a lawyer, right?" I shook my head
and then she continued, "Well he is, and he went to law school with the
prosecuting attorney. He's trying to pull every string he can to get them to
drop the charges. Right now Tony is saying that they will allow it all to fall
on Shawn. Meaning, if he doesn't want them to pursue it, it could all go away.
But that's where it’s really fucked up. Am I a terrible person for feeling like
Shawn has every right to press charges? Jason went fucking crazy on him, Sadie!
I'm not even sure I trust his temper after watching him that night. He was
crazy!"

 
Holy shit!
She has been in the middle of a sand storm all by herself.

 
"Heather,
you are an amazing person, don't question that. This is fucking crazy. I'm not
sure what Shawn will decide, but leave it up to Shawn. Jason did that to him,
not you. I can see where Jason could scare you. You know full well I don't like
tempers. That part is your decision. But Jason has never given off the vibe
that he could be abusive to me. After James, I trusted men about a far as I
could throw them. Mike, Jason, Dave, Bryan, and Shawn, they all made me feel
safe, not scared. That's why I pretty much wrapped myself around them. But you
have to go with your gut."

 
"That
is, if Jason will ever get over me not telling him to begin with. He says if I
was honest to begin with, none of this would have ever happened and I agree
with that. "

 
"Bull
shit! If you would have said that you slept with Shawn, because that's what you
convinced yourself must have happened back then, he would have tracked him down
and done the exact same thing. You didn’t want to lose him. That's why you
didn't say anything. I would have probably done the same thing."

 
"It all
still makes me feel awful. Shawn gets to have his wires removed next week. It’s
been great to at least be able to communicate by
paper,
I just can't wait for him to look like him again."

 
"Me
either. Heather, I'm so glad we finally got to talk about this. It makes me
feel better about you not doing this by yourself."

 
"Believe
me, Sadie; it feels a lot better talking to someone finally. You are the best
friend I have. Don't blame any of this on yourself for me not telling you. I
just needed time."

 
I got up and
hugged her. I love this girl something fierce. After dinner we cleaned up and
decided to chill back and watch some TV. We hadn't caught up on the Housewives
of New Jersey in forever together. It was pretty damn funny watching those
women, who are supposed to be ladies, act like little spoiled brats. DVR
recorders are the shit. It allowed us to catch up on old seasons in their
entirety. I think it was about three season’s worth of shows before we were
ready to call it a night. There is definitely something to be said about your
best friend being your roommate. It doesn't get better than this.

 
The next
morning when I woke up, I opened my eyes and had a euphoric feeling that
brought chills to my whole body. I was officially twenty one today! There was
absolutely no part of me that wanted to lounge in bed. Today would be one of
the most significant days in my life. I jumped out of bed and immediately took
a shower. The house was empty already so after I was done getting dressed, I
decided a trip to see my mom and dad was essential.

 
The drive to
their house was only thirty five minutes away. I really should make this trip
more often, but with work keeping me so busy and the fact that I want to stay
close to my friends, I don't. Pathetic, isn't it? I pulled up into the driveway
of the home I grew up in. Every time I see it, it just makes me smile. I had a
great childhood and I have two amazing parents to thank for it. When I walked
in the door, I was greeted by their boxer, Tyson. He was eighty five pounds of
an adorable dog. I don't think he could stop wiggling his butt when he was
excited if he tried. I went to the kitchen in search of my mom and I found
Heather there as well.

 
"What
is going on? And where is your car?"

 
"Well, hello
to you, too" came from my mom as she grabbed me into a hug and then
showered my face with kisses like she did when I was five years old.
"Happy birthday, Sadie girl"!

 
"Thanks,
Mom, but I really don't understand..."

 
"Is that
my Sadie girl I hear?" My dad came in to the room with a smile. He grabbed
me from my mom and squeezed the crap out of me.

 
"Hi, Dad.
You know, you’re killing me slowly here,
right?"

 
"You’re
always so silly, Sadie. So did Mom tell you about your party...
"

 
"Bill!
Shut up!" It was crazy how that came out of my mom and Heather’s mouth simultaneously.
What party?

 
"What
party?"

 
My mom spoke
first, "It was supposed to be a surprise but Heather and I wanted to take
you on a spa day. Your father, for some reason, keeps calling it a girl party
because he can't go."

 
Yeah right!
Or, maybe?
That does sound like my dad.

 
"Dad, I
came out here to see you too. Maybe we could meet up for dinner? By the way,
Mom, how did you know I was coming out so early to have planned a whole day at
the spa? And Heather, how did you get out here?"

 
"Sadie,
what's with the twenty questions? Let me try to tackle these in order. Your mom
called me last week about taking you to the spa for a special surprise. We
planned on picking you up. No one knew you were driving out here. And I went by
my parents’ house before I came over here. I only live three houses down. I
walked over. Why are you being all suspicious?"

 
"Because,
you all are being shady about something, I can just feel it."

 
"For
once, your gut is wrong. So, are you ready to go get pampered, Miss I'm twenty
one?"

 
"I just
got here."

 
"We
know this, honey, but Heather and I would have left five minutes ago to come
get you. Our first appointment is our facials and we need to be there on time
or it will mess up the whole day." My mom was always a worry wart.

 
"Okay.
I just feel bad about Dad. Are you sure he doesn't want a massage or something?
He could come too?"

 
"Sadie,
I'm a grown ass man. I am not going to a spa. But thanks for thinking of me.
You sure have turned into one amazing woman. I am so proud of you."

 
"Thank
you, Dad" I gave him a huge hug and then turned to the boss ladies.
"I'm ready when you are."

 
The whole
day was filled with being pampered from head to toe, just as promised. Speaking
of my head, I had them put in honey colored highlights and they look amazing! We
went to the mall also and my mom was adamant that she pay for the dress I
picked out. Heather said it was a must have, even though I didn't know where I
could ever wear it. It was not appropriate for work that was for sure. I did
love it though. The dress seemed simple until I tried it on. It was black,
strapless, skin tight and rested just above the knee. It had a gold zipper that
ran the whole length of the back. I knew just the shoes to pair it with. When
we got back to mom and dad’s house, Heather told me she had to leave. It was a
great day and I couldn’t have imagined it being any better. I thanked Heather
over and over again and told her I would see her later at home. I walked back
in the house with my mom and told my dad all about our day. We decided to skip
dinner because my mom was coming down with a migraine. She suffered from them
periodically. So I kissed both of them, gave my favorite dog one last rub down
and left for home with a huge smile on my face. What a great birthday it turned
out to be.

 
When I got
back to the apartment I found Heather sitting on the couch dressed to kill. I
wasn't sure if Jason was on his way to pick her up or what was going on. She
just had this wicked smile on her face.

 
"Where
are you going so dressed up? By the way, you look fantastic! I'm glad you
bought that dress today. It looks like it was made for you." It really
did. Heather was tall. It was hard to find dresses that didn't look like minis
on her with those legs she has.

 
"You
mean, where are we going with me so dressed up? Oh, and don't think I'm the
only one dressing up either. Go get on the dress we just got for you. It’s time
I introduced you to a real bar. Not one that you can a throw ball at
pins."

 
I did not
see this coming, but I was so excited!

 
"Seriously,
I'm in! Just let me go change and it’s on! We are going to have so much
fun!"

 
I ran
upstairs and hurried into my dress. The shoes I picked are gold strappy
Manolo
Blahniks
. They were my
first big spend after I started doing hair, and they were worth every penny. I
retouched the makeup I had done at the spa and was ready to go. Did I mention I
was excited? I went back down stairs and Heather was standing there holding out
a pair of huge gold hoop earrings that would finish my outfit off.