First Kiss (Heavy Influence) (30 page)

“I’m outta here. I can’t do this with you here, mom. This is bullshit.” These were the only words I could find without completely going off and regretting it.

“Jake you’d better watch it,
” Notting growled.

“Jake, don
’t talk to your mother that way,” Aly whispered under her breath, pleading and clung to my arm.

My mother was seething with
alarm in her eyes. I was too afraid to look at Notting. I’d never spoken to my mother like that.

“I’ll see you
at home in no less than an hour,” she said through clenched teeth and blew past us.

“Well mate, looks like you’ve got some fessing up to do. I didn’t realize you’d hadn’t spoken to her about Miss Aly here.”

“Notting, it’s bad enough she runs every other aspect of my life. I don’t need her running this too. Let’s go, Aly.”

Aly hesitated, sheepishly mouthing “
Sorry
” to Notting. I wasn’t sorry. This whole thing was getting blown way out of proportion.

***

Aly and I drove most of the way in silence with the stereo blaring. She sang along to a compilation of old school Aerosmith, Nirvana, Rolling Stones and the new breed of independent artists. She had a sweet voice, slightly pitchy, but solid enough that if she had some training, she could really sing well.

I didn’t want to go home, I wanted to be with Aly.

“I’m not going home. I’m either going to get a hotel, or stay at Dump’s.” I affirmed and bounced her tiny fingers around in my hand.

“What? Why?
” Aly gripped my hand, stopping my nervous fidgeting.

Taking a deep breath in, not sure how to proceed. I didn’t want to give her an inkling that my mother probably wanted to tell me to stop seeing her, because A) that would not happen and B) it would only hurt her feelings and make her self-conscious about coming over. I had to figure out how to convince my mom that Aly wasn’t going to be an issue.

“Uh, hello, aren’t you gonna answer me? Kate will worry and you can’t
not
go home, Jake. That’s totally irresponsible. It’s the exact reason she went off on you in the first place.”

“What are you now, my conscience?” I snapped, and as soon as I did, I felt bad. She sat there staring at me through narrowed eyes, speechless. “I’m sorry.” I clinched the steering wheel. I was pissed at my mother for being such a
miserable bitch, always poking her nose in every little thing.

“Aly, it’s complicated. If I were to go back to my place, she and I would have it out, and I wouldn’t see you tonight and I wanna be with you as much as I can before I leave.”

She had no idea how bad I wanted to be with her.

“Don’t remind me about you leaving. I’ve been tr
ying not to think about it,” she said softly. Her head dipped down, hair now covering her face.

“Hey, we have this weekend, and then I’ll have 2 shows here in L.A. The time will blow by. I’ll be home before you know it.”

“Yeah, for you it will. I’ll be stuck here dealing with my sister telling me -
I told you so. -
But whatevs,” she grumbled, shrugging her shoulders. “I’ll stay with you. I’ll tell my parents I’m staying somewhere else.”

I thought about where to stay
. I didn’t want to be in Dumps scumbag apartment, I shuddered just thinking about it. No, it had to be a hotel. Hermosa Beach had a few to choose from, but then that was too close to home, someone might see us. Venice or Santa Monica would be better.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” She smiled, grabbing my hand. “I’ve never been so sure, it’s been easy so far doin’ it.” She laughed. “I’ll call my mom now and tell her I’ll be at Nicole’s.”

I was uneasy.

30

Alyssa

I was nervous and excited all at t
he same time and stoked to be alone with Jake finally, with parents far far away. I wondered if he would try to do it with me, and if I could if he did. My heart started thumping hard just thinking about it, and about how bad I wanted to earlier, feeling him firm against me. I couldn’t believe I turned a guy on. The thought of it made my insides tingle. If we did it, would it make us totally official? I reasoned with myself, like I was making some sort of a deal. I really wanted this to be more, to give him what he wanted, so he’d know what would be waiting for him when he returned. I didn’t want to be the immature, innocent little girl that he perceived me to be. He was always babying me, being my protector. I wanted to move past that. I wanted to prove that I was worthy of someone like him and that I could hold my own.

             
“What’s wrong?” he asked shaking my hand.

             
“Nothing, why?”

             
“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “You got all quiet. If you’re having second thoughts, we don’t have to do this. We can go home.”

             
“No, no, I want to be with you. I don’t want to go home.” I reassured him. I sighed deeply and like a ruptured water pipe without warning, words just spilled out of my mouth. “Well, there is one thing. You know, since it’s obviously changed between us.”

I couldn’t spit the rest out. I froze.

“What do you mean?” he asked smiling at me, tugging on my fingers.

He glanced back and forth at me, and the road ahead.

              “It just seems so.” I hesitated. “Intense now.”

He waited and turned down the radio.

              “And.” Coaxing me along which was one thing I loved about him, he always made me relax.

             
I laughed, nervously. “Jake I feel like, self-conscious now, it’s weird. I find myself thinking about every little thing. I want this weirdness I feel to go away.”

             
“If it makes you feel any better, I feel the same way.” He admitted. “I have to be honest, right? Going with what feels good and right. I trust you.”

             
Untangling our fingers his warm hand rubbed my bare thigh, sending butterflies right up my spine.

             
“Ditto.” Was the only word I managed to squeeze out in my self-conscious state. I was a ball of nerves thinking about what the night held.

             
“We’re gonna live it up tonight, since this may be the last time we see each other for a while.”

             
“Why’s that?” I asked uneasily. I couldn’t hide my feelings. It was impossible. I was needy and utterly in love with him, and it was all about to become clear. My first schoolgirl crush, now I’m an obsessive stalker. As long as he was a willing participant, my enabler, I would be bare, always.

             
“Kate’s gonna kick my ass up and down the street when I come home tomorrow.”

             
“What about the party tomorrow night?”

             
“Ha, the party’s no problem, since we’re playing. But she’ll demand I come straight home and lecture me about bullshit I’m not doing right. She won’t let me live this down for a while, but whatever.” He shrugged off the thought. “So, on to our epic eve, Alycat. Where would you like to stay, in a fabulous high rise overlooking the city or on the beach?”

             
My stupid, juvenile reaction was to giggle. “I don’t know. You pick, since this is your idea.”

             
“Ok, we’ll stay on the beach. I’ve been to this swanky hotel called Shutters, and it’s pretty rad. The rooms are pretty snazzy.”

             
“Really and when was the last time you were at this
snazzy
hotel?” I questioned, mocking him warily.

             
“We went to meet up with some people hanging out at the pool, partied there one afternoon. This was last year. I’m sure not much has changed,” he said smiling, then reached up turning the music louder.

             
I hadn’t been away from our beach town and into the city only but two other times to shop on Melrose Avenue. This was a different life. There were bums, everywhere. Come to think of it, we didn’t have any bums. Well, we had our one local bum. Our bum looked better off than these bums. I felt sorry for them with their ill fitting shoes or no shoes at all and their filthy clothes and grimy, greasy unkempt hair with toothless grins and pirate teeth. I noticed many of them talked to themselves. It made me sad to think they once had mothers. I wondered if their mothers loved them and held them or if they had children of their own.

             
“Hey.” Jake shook my leg. “Why the silence, I’m beginning to think this may be a bad idea.”

             
“Oh, no, I was just thinking about all these homeless people around. Why are there so many here? It’s really sad, I’m sad for them, like wondering if they ever had families.”

             
“Yeah, it’s pretty crazy that you’ve got million dollar homes and swanky hotels juxtaposed with the homeless. Santa Monica is pro-homeless. They feed them over near the civic center, by where the court buildings are.” He explained, shrugging. “I fed the homeless one Thanksgiving there.”

             
“Really?” I glanced at him and gave an inquisitive look. I’m not sure if I was surprised or endeared. “That’s really sweet of you.”

             
“At first I didn’t want to, but when I got there. There were like, regular people there, with their kids. People who looked like you and I, people down on their luck. It’s eye opening to think how your life can change in a heartbeat.”

             
All I could do was nod, sadly.

Lost in my melancholy bum sympathy, I hadn’t realized we arrived at our destination and he was right, it was over the top. There were t
hose valet guys with black suits, rushing around taking and retrieving vehicles for their obviously wealthy customers. I felt ill at ease waiting for our turn at having our car doors opened by one of these crisply pressed worker-bees. I looked at those stepping out and retrieving their Range Rovers and Mercedes-Benz, the Lexus’ and BMW’s. Ours was the only regular ride in view. Even the hipsters, who looked like rock stars and movie stars, were driving super nice cars. At least when Jake was away from his truck, he would fit in with these L.A. types. Glancing at him with his disheveled black hair, his smooth perfect skin, and his jaw line showing a bit of hair growth, I went weak.

His brilliant, impossibly blue eyes shot a look at me catching me off guard.

              “This is why I love being with you Alycat, because it’s all too real with you. You see things through different eyes.” He smiled broadly at me with his brilliant white teeth.

             
“I’m sorry?” I asked, confused, lost in is aura.

             
“Your concern about the bums.” He reminded me.

Ju
st then one of the most hottest valet guys I’d ever seen opened my door. He couldn’t have been much older than Jake, with his blonde, beach boy hair, tanned skin and a thousand watt smile. I was sure I blushed, because I felt the heat rise instantly.

“Checking in?” The v
alet hottie asked curiously.

             
“Um, yeah,” I answered awkwardly.

             
His eyes twinkled, not leaving mine and I couldn’t help but smile back at him.

             
He glanced around quickly, as if he was looking for someone in particular. “Parent’s already checked in?”

Did he really just ask me that?

              Before I could eek out one syllable Jake was at my side, with his glasses on looking beyond the part. I could have passed out. Abruptly he put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close. My heart stopped. Valet hottie stood taller and a cool smile appeared on his face as he and Jake stood eye to eye. I held my breath not knowing what to expect.

             
“They’re no parents here,” Jake responded brusquely. “Thanks.”

             
Jake pulled me away towards the hotel entrance and all I could do was smile a quirky grin at valet hottie as he wished us a nice stay. I was a little embarrassed and I wasn’t sure why. I felt totally out of place, like everyone just knew was a virgin, about to have my cherry popped by my obviously older boyfriend. My only savior, my one slight relief was my attempt to look the part, with my new duds and my new polished face. I looked like I could, potentially, be an acceptable match for someone like Jake.

Hiding behind my bed-head hairdo and my mask of black eye make-up, we entered into the sleekest lobby I’d ever seen. It was quite a contrast from the Motel 6’s my family stayed at in the past. Pictures don’t do a place like this justice. I’d seen the pictures of top rated hotels on those travel shows, but until you actually see one of them first hand, you’ll never fully understand.

              “I guess that’s a little taste of what I have to worry about when I leave.” He whispered, pressing his lips to my temple. Was that a question? I wasn’t sure, so I didn’t make a peep. There were no peeps to be had. I was in a speechless fog of surreal firsts.