First Love, Last Love (16 page)

‘I’ll get over Alex Blair,’ Lauri told her vehemently. ‘I’ll make sure of it.’

She did hand her notice in the next day, much to the Personnel Officer’s surprise. No doubt he had thought the Prescott family were here to stay.

Carly called her into her office midway through the morning. ‘Mr Rand has told me you’ve handed in your notice,’ she came straight to the point. ‘I wondered whether it was because of anything I or one of the girls have done. I know they were being a bit bitchy last week about you dating Mr Blair, but the majority of them seem to have forgotten it over the weekend.’

Lauri only wished she could do the same! ‘It has
nothing to do with that, really. I just—’

‘Oh dear,’ Carly was looking at something over Lauri’s shoulder. ‘Did you tell Mr Blair you were leaving?’

Lauri frowned. ‘No.’

‘Well, I think he’s just found out,’ Carly grimaced.

‘What do you—Oh!’ Lauri broke off as Alex burst into the room.

‘Out!’ he held the door open for Carly to leave, which she did with no hesitation.

Lauri would have done the same in her position. Alex looked furious, his blue eyes blazing. But even so, he had no right to order Carly out of her own office—even if he did own it and the building it stood in. Lauri stood up too, moving towards the door Alex had just slammed shut.

‘Where the hell do you think you’re going?’ Alex rasped harshly.

Her head went back defiantly, her eyes challenging. ‘I’m going back to my desk, to work. And if you don’t like it you can sack me!’

‘Rather a pointless exercise when you’ve already given in your notice,’ he retorted angrily.

‘Exactly,’ she agreed sweetly. ‘Now if you will let me pass?’

‘Certainly.’ He moved aside, even opening the door for her.

To say Lauri was surprised by his acquiescence after storming down here was putting it mildly. But she managed to walk stiffly past him, not realising he had followed her until she felt his familiar firm grasp on her upper arm as he marched her completely out of the office. Once outside he swung her round against the wall, his hands on either side of her head as he held her immovable. Not that she could have moved anyway, being much too aware of the male magnetism of him, the totally male smell of him as he held his
body only inches away from her own.

‘Where did you go yesterday?’ he demanded to know.

‘Go?’ she repeated jerkily, cursing herself for being unnerved by him once again.

‘When you walked out on Laurence.’

She stiffened just at the mention of the man’s name, in no way having come to terms with his relationship to her. ‘I went home,’ she said huskily.

‘But not straight away,’ he persisted.

Her eyes flashed. ‘No, not straight away! I—I went for a walk. I needed to think.’

‘And did you come to any conclusions?’

‘Oh yes,’ she said bitterly. ‘I came to the conclusion that I’m justified in hating both you and your brother-in-law.’

‘Hate Laurence if you must, but don’t include me in the emotion. What you feel towards me is far from hate.’

‘You flatter yourself,’ she stormed.

‘Do I?’ he asked huskily.

‘Yes!’

‘Let’s see, shall we?’ he murmured throatily before his dark head swooped and his mouth claimed hers, his body lowering fully on to hers, moving seductively against her as he determined to make her fully aware of him.

‘Stop this!’ Lauri gasped for air as his mouth left hers to travel over her throat. ‘What if someone should see us?’ She looked about them guiltily. ‘Alex, please!’

‘I might consider letting you go if you’ll come up to my office with me.’

‘No!’ she refused instantly.

‘Then we stay here.’ Alex forced her mouth open again, wringing a response from her even while she fought him.

She relaxed against him, hoping to disconcert him, hardly able to control her elation as she heard him
groan before taking her fully into his arms, his hands caressing her back. She let his caresses continue until she felt he was completely aroused by her, weakened by his own desire—and then she struck. She pushed him away as hard as she could, seeing by the glazed look in his eyes that he was still enmeshed in his passion for her, could even now not comprehend why she had left the possession of his arms.

She was almost drawn back against him by her own feelings for him, but she forced herself to walk away, more of a run really, as she felt him collect his scattered wits and start to come after her. She turned to face him. ‘I think constant sexual advances from my employer are reason enough for me to waive my notice and leave right now.’

Alex’s eyes hardened. ‘Sexual advances? Why, you little—! I wasn’t making sexual advances, I was—’

‘Don’t tell me,’ she scorned. ‘You were making love to me?’

‘Yes!’ he snapped, his face rigid.

Lauri gave a harsh laugh. ‘When you love someone it’s called that, and I’m not stupid enough to think you love me. If you’re hoping to persuade me to see Laurence then you’re wasting your time—I don’t want to see him, just as I don’t want to see you. I would have thought that was obvious by now, or are you just too conceited to have got the message?’

‘Oh, I’ve got the message, once and for all. You’re a stupid, stubborn female, and I don’t know why I’ve wasted my time on you this long. Run away, little girl, it’s the last time you’ll need to do so on my account. I’m tired of playing little-girl games, I’m going out to get myself a woman, and right now!’

Each word was like a blow to Lauri, a physical blow. She gave a choked sob before turning on her heel and running.
The party was going well, all the work and preparation beforehand now seemed worth it. The engagement hadn’t been announced yet, and wouldn’t be for some hours, not until everyone was here.

Lauri was responsible for the arrangement of the room, the fine selection of records, and the beautiful display of food. She had had all week to organise this party, to make it a special occasion for Jane and Robin. There had been nothing else for her to do, she hadn’t managed to find another job for herself yet.

It seemed poor Jane had been bearing the brunt of Alex’s anger all week; his attitude seemed to be that if he couldn’t get at Lauri then her aunt would do instead. Poor Jane had been made to work late every evening, which made Robin furious.

Lauri had seen nothing of Alex herself. Not that she had expected to after their last stormy encounter. But she had longed to, had wanted him with a fever that made her pride seem stupid and childish. But if she were to go to him and he were to reject her, as he was likely to do, she would be more hurt than ever.

She had given Laurence Daniels a lot of thought too. No matter how much she hated the thought of discovering he was her father she was also drawn to him, to getting to know the man he was.

She went once again to answer the doorbell, sure that almost everyone was here now. Her eyes widened as she saw Alex Blair standing on the doorstep. She wanted so much to see him, and now that he was here in front of her she could only stand and gape at him.

‘What’s going on?’ He quirked an eyebrow at the sound of music and chatter coming from the room behind her.

She swallowed hard, unable to take her eyes off him, off how attractive he looked in cream fitted trousers and a cream silk shirt that made his tanned skin all the
more noticeable. ‘A—a party,’ she answered haltingly.

He nodded. ‘Can you leave it?’

‘Leave?’

‘Laurence needs you. I told him I would come and get you. Don’t worry,’ he added grimly, ‘I’m not here on my own account. I’ve given up on children.’

‘And found yourself a woman,’ she said with remembered bitterness.

‘Yes.’

‘I hope she proves satisfactory.’

‘Very. Now will you come to the hospital with me or not?’

‘Is he worse?’ Lauri couldn’t keep the concern out of her voice.

‘The doctors are worried about him.’

‘And so are you, apparently.’

He shrugged. ‘Let’s just say that now I’m a man I’ve decided to put such childish things as revenge behind me.’ He gave her a pointed look. ‘Something some people can talk about but never put into practice. Hating Laurence was juvenile and destructive. Who’s to say I wouldn’t do the same thing, trapped in a marriage that hadn’t had any love in it for years? Laurence suffered for trying to find love, by loving your mother I think he was punished enough.’

‘But his loving my mother produced me,’ Lauri said dully.

‘He wants to see you, Lauren.’ He studied her closely. ‘And I think deep down you really want to see him.’

‘Yes,’ she admitted with a sigh. ‘I want—I want to know about the love they shared, how he felt when he saw me for the first time. There are so many things I want to know. Alex, I—’

‘Lauri, are you—Mr Blair!’ Steve stood behind them. ‘What are you doing here?’ he asked bluntly.

‘Borrowing your niece for an hour or so,’ Alex answered him pleasantly enough.

Steve looked at Lauri. ‘But you can’t leave now. What about the engagement?’

Alex stiffened, looking at her sharply. ‘What engagement?’

‘Jane’s,’ she supplied. ‘She and Robin are getting engaged tonight, that’s what this party is about.’

‘I see. Well, I’ll only keep Lauren an hour,’ he told Steve. ‘We—we have some things to discuss.’

‘Jane will be very disappointed if you aren’t here,’ Steve warned her.

‘I’ll be here,’ she called as Alex literally dragged her away.

‘So Mummy and Daddy approved of her,’ Alex drawled on the way to the hospital.

Having met Mr and Mrs Harley tonight Lauri didn’t envy Jane her future parents-in-law. They were both too much like Robin, with no sense of humour or fun, and Mr Harley was terribly henpecked by his wife. ‘There’s no need to sneer,’ she snapped, indignant for her aunt. ‘Jane thought it important.’

‘And I don’t. We’ll have to agree to differ.’

‘We usually do—differ, I mean,’ Lauri answered absently, most of her thoughts with the man lying sick in a hospital bed, the man she had recently discovered was her father.

‘Not all the time,’ Alex said huskily. ‘I can remember a few occasions when we both wanted the same thing.’

‘I’m trying to forget them,’ she said curtly, knowing she would never be able to erase the memory of being in his arms from her mind. ‘You said Laurence was worse,’ she changed the subject.

‘I said he wanted to see you,’ he corrected.

Lauri turned to give him an accusing look. ‘So he isn’t worse.’

‘He’s still a very ill man.’

‘But no worse.’

‘No worse,’ he confirmed coolly. ‘In fact, a little better.’

‘Then why—’

‘But not well enough,’ he cut in on her heated query, ‘to be able to come after you, which is what he has been wanting to do all week.’

‘He has?’ she asked uncertainly.

‘You’re his daughter, he loves you.’

‘He doesn’t even know me,’ she scorned.

‘Maybe not, but I do, and I’ve told him all about you.’

‘All?’ she blushed.

Alex grinned. ‘Well, perhaps not all. Some things are too private to tell a third person, especially if he happens to be your father.’

Laurence Daniels looked so pleased to see her she felt guilty about her desertion of him earlier in the week.

‘You came,’ he said dazedly. ‘Alex said he would get you here, but I didn’t believe him. Knowing Alex as I do I should have realised he would succeed.’

Lauri was amazed at how much better he looked, a more healthy pink to his cheeks, a little more flesh on his bones, although his eyes remained sunken and ill-looking. But her animosity towards him wasn’t completely forgotten, and her reply to him was sharp. ‘Alex was as unscrupulous in getting me here as he is in all of his other dealings,’ she glared at the subject of their conversation, meeting only amusement in those steady blue eyes. ‘And if I’m not back for the announcement of my aunt’s engagement I’ll personally throttle him!’

Laurence frowned. ‘Your aunt?’

She gave him a concerned glance. ‘Yes. Jane is getting engaged tonight, and—’

‘Jane!’ he repeated in a strangulated voice. ‘You have an aunt called Jane?’

‘Why, yes.’ She frowned her puzzlement.

‘But Jane isn’t your aunt, she—she’s your
mother
!’

L
AURI
felt strong arms go about her as she swayed, guiding her over to a chair as she turned to stare at the man in the bed propped up by numerous pillows.

‘Hell, Laurence,’ Alex turned on him angrily, ‘you can’t go throwing accusations like that about! Look at her, you’ve shocked the life out of her!’

‘But I—Jane is the woman I love, the woman I’ve always loved,’ Laurence told them dazedly. ‘She’s the mother of my child.’

‘
My
mother?’ Lauri was just as dazed.

‘Yes,’ he nodded.

‘Thank God for that!’ she sighed raggedly, feeling only relief at his disclosure. It might be even more of a shock than finding out he was her father, but at least it meant the woman she had always believed to be her mother had never been unfaithful to her husband. And in truth Jane had always been more of a mother to her than anyone else had.

‘You’re all right?’ Alex asked her gently.

‘Yes,’ she nodded.

He turned to his brother-in-law. ‘Perhaps you wouldn’t mind explaining,’ he said tersely.

‘I—Just tell me one thing, Lauri,’ Laurence pleaded. ‘Jane, my Jane, is still alive?’

She gave a shaky smile. ‘She’s brought me up since I was a child.’

‘My God!’ he groaned, collapsing weakly back on to the pillows. ‘I can hardly believe it!’

‘I’m not sure I can either,’ Lauri choked.

‘Explain, Laurence,’ Alex commanded, sitting beside Lauri to take her hand in his, his thumb rhythmically
caressing the delicate veins at her wrist.

She felt grateful for his hold on her, feeling somehow as if all sanity had deserted her. It now appeared that far from being the orphan she had believed herself to be the last ten years, both her mother and father were still alive. Why had Jane, her mother, never told her the truth? Was she ashamed of her, wanting to shield their true relationship? It somehow didn’t fit in with the Jane she knew.

‘Jane was only seventeen when I met her,’ Laurence began talking, ‘while I was already thirty-five.’ His look was distant, as if he were reliving it all. ‘I loved her on sight. We met quite accidentally, in the park. She was beautiful, had a startling honesty that almost frightened me, a zest for life that I craved. I began to take her out, quite innocent little outings at first, because I knew she only saw me as a friend. I suppose she considered me too old for any romantic involvement,’ he added ruefully. ‘But gradually I felt her feelings for me begin to change, knew that she was coming to care for me in the same way I cared for her.’

‘And I’m sure you omitted to tell her you were already married,’ Alex put in dryly.

Laurence flushed. ‘How did you know that?’

‘After having her as my secretary for three years I believe I know a little about Jane. She would never have had anything to do with you if she’d known about Beth.’

‘You’re right, of course,’ Laurence said dully. ‘But I loved her too much to lose her. So I kept quiet about Beth, which in the end was my downfall. Jane found out and refused to see me again. When I went round to her parents’ house they told me she’d gone away to stay with relatives, but they refused to tell me where. I—I thought I would die without her.’

‘You had no idea she’d gone away because she was expecting your child?’ Alex prompted.

‘None at all. It only happened the once, you see,’ an embarrassed hue coloured his cheeks. ‘It never occurred to me … Beth was in hospital for a week having tests, tests to see if there was anything to be done for her.’ He put up a hand to his temples. ‘I’m sorry about this, Alex, I know she was your sister, but … There’d been so many tests, so many disappointments, and each time Beth’s hatred of me got worse. I think Jane must have sensed some of my despair because when I—when we—She gave herself to me with no reservations.’

‘That would be Jane,’ Alex said coldly. ‘You took advantage of the fact that she loved you, that she knew nothing of your loveless sterile marriage, and you ruined her life for her.’

‘Yes,’ Laurence choked, ‘it seems I did all of that. But until I saw Lauri just over a week ago I had no idea of just how much damage I’d done her. And then Lauri told me her mother was dead! God, I wanted to die too. When Beth died and I decided to come back to England I had some crazy idea of finding Jane again, although how I intended doing that I have no idea. And then Alex turned up at the airport with you! I knew straight away who you were, and I thought Alex had done it deliberately to hurt me.’

‘And instead I was as shocked as you were,’ Alex told him harshly. ‘More so, probably,’ he added bitterly.

‘Not really, Alex’ Lauri spoke for the first time, challenge in her voice. ‘Through me you thought you would get your revenge on Laurence that you’ve always wanted. You decided to make love to me, get me to admit to loving you in the heat of your experienced caresses, and then taunt him with the knowledge that you had his daughter exactly where you wanted her, in your arms and in your bed.’

‘Lauri!’ Laurence was shocked. ‘You’re wrong about that.’

‘Am I?’ she asked Alex shrilly. ‘Well, am I?’ she demanded.

His eyes were like an icy blue ocean, cold and forbidding. He shrugged. ‘Maybe not so far wrong.’

‘You see?’ she said bitterly, whatever hope she had had left crumbling at her feet. ‘But it didn’t work.’

‘We were interrupted during my seduction of her,’ Alex informed the older man carelessly.

Laurence’s eyes widened. ‘Alex, it isn’t true! You told me—’

‘The first part of it is true,’ Alex admitted cruelly. ‘I’m not sure I would have cared a damn about revenge on you if I’d managed to get Lauren into bed.’

‘I hate you!’ she told him vehemently.

He shrugged at Laurence. ‘As you can see, my plan failed.’

Laurence frowned. ‘Alex? I thought you said—’

‘Forget what I said,’ he dismissed. ‘Lauren’s version is so much better than mine, don’t you think, so much neater.’

‘No, I don’t,’ Laurence snapped.

‘Well, it’s the one we’ll all have to settle for right now,’ Alex told him abruptly. ‘There’s something else of more importance to deal with at the moment. Are you aware of the fact that your beloved Jane is even now on the point of becoming engaged to another man?’

‘Because she was once hurt so badly that the only thing she requires from a husband is that he be safe and reliable and will never let her down,’ Lauri told them coldly.

Laurence’s eyes darkened with pain. ‘Is that what she said?’

‘Yes,’ she answered cruelly.

He drew a ragged breath. ‘God, I must have almost destroyed her!’

‘We have to concern ourselves with the present,’ Alex told him firmly. ‘If nothing else the two of you owe it to each other to meet—and preferably before the engagement takes place.’

Lauri gave him a hard stare. ‘You don’t expect Jane—my mother,’ she amended shakily, ‘you don’t expect her to still love him?’

‘None of us can know how she feels,’ he snapped. ‘That’s why we have to get her here. Laurence is hardly in any condition to go to her. I’ll go and get her.’

Lauri gave a scornful smile. ‘You may have got me here on a pretext, but I doubt Jane will be so easily persuaded to leave her own engagement party.’

‘We’ll see, shall we?’ he taunted.

‘We certainly will,’ she said smugly.

‘I shouldn’t be long, Laurence,’ he assured the other man, standing up and in consequence letting Lauri’s hand drop to her side. ‘Don’t worry, she’ll be here.’

‘Huh!’ Lauri scoffed.

His narrowed blue eyes levelled on her. ‘As for you, young lady, while I’m prepared to overlook—certain things you do and say, when all this is over you and I have a few things to discuss.’

‘I can’t think of a single thing we have to talk about!’

He smiled. ‘Maybe not, but I can. So be warned.’

She turned away. ‘You can’t force me to even acknowledge your existence.’

‘Oh, I can force you to acknowledge a damn sight more than that—any time I choose to. I just don’t choose to just yet. I shouldn’t be long, Laurence,’ he added determinedly.

‘She won’t come with him,’ Lauri said obstinately, once she was alone with Laurence Daniels. ‘Why should she?’

‘Because I still love her.’

‘You don’t know her!’ her eyes sparkled angrily. ‘You haven’t seen her for almost eighteen years. You don’t know the woman she’s become.’

‘I can see how well she’s brought you up, what a beautiful young woman she’s made of you. You’re everything she was at that age, loyal, trusting, and independent.’

‘But she’s never told me she’s my mother! Doesn’t that tell you anything? She’s ashamed of my birth, of having once loved you. She’s had years to tell me the truth, and yet she chose not to. I think the reason for that is obvious.’

‘I hope you’re wrong,’ he said fervently. ‘I really hope you’re wrong.’

Lauri didn’t know what she wanted any more. To find that
Jane
was the woman Laurence Daniels loved. And Jane must have still loved him after her baby had been born, why else would she have called her daughter Lauren, a female name as much like Laurence as she could make it.

She wasn’t surprised when Alex came back into the hospital room alone, although his first words soon disillusioned her.

‘Jane’s outside,’ he told them almost triumphantly. ‘She wants to see you, Lauren.’

She stood up, swallowing nervously. This would be the first time she had ever faced Jane as her daughter. She stepped outside the room, conscious of Alex standing behind her. As she looked at Jane her whole world suddenly zoomed back into focus. Jane loved her, had always loved her, and their relationship had always been much closer than just aunt and niece, she knew that now.

Jane rushed towards her, her anxiety evident. ‘Are you all right?’ she demanded to know. ‘Mr Blair would
only tell me that you were at the hospital.’ She searched Lauri’s face for sign of injury. ‘What happened?’

‘I’m not hurt,’ Lauri assured her with a smile, tears shining in her eyes. ‘I’m not hurt at all—Mum.’

Jane’s face went very white. ‘M-Mum?’ she gasped, her face now a sickly grey colour.

‘Yes,’ Lauri squeezed her hand reassuringly. ‘And there’s someone in that room over there who would like very much to talk to you.’

‘Wh-who is it?’ Jane gasped.

‘Can’t you guess?’ Lauri teased.

‘L-Laurence?’ Jane asked dazedly.

Lauri nodded. ‘My father. He’s Alex’s brother-in-law.’

Jane looked at her employer. ‘Then Beth—’

‘Was my sister,’ he acknowledged gently. ‘But that’s all in the past. Laurence is all alone in the world now.’

‘He loves us both very much,’ Lauri continued, ‘and he wants the chance to prove it. I’d like you to give him that chance,’ she added softly.

Jane’s big brown eyes flooded with tears, her usual calm assurance completely deserting her. ‘You—you like him?’

‘Very much. Much more than I do Robin,’ Lauri added mischievously.

‘Oh, my God—Robin!’ Jane turned to Alex. ‘I completely forgot about him when you said Lauri was at the hospital. Whatever must he think of me?’

‘It’s all right,’ Alex soothed her. ‘I had a word with Steve while you were getting your coat. He was going to take Robin aside and explain the situation to him.’ He looked at his wrist-watch. ‘The party should be breaking up about now.’

‘Oh, this is terrible!’ Jane put her hands up to her face. ‘He’s going to hate me when he knows the truth.’

‘Does that really matter?’ Lauri asked gently. ‘If I’d
known before that I was your daughter, with Robin as my prospective future stepfather, I would have told you exactly what I think of him. I hate him. He’s stuffy and disapproving, and he would never have made you truly happy.’

‘So you don’t want me to marry him?’

‘I’d rather have my real father. I’ll even be bridesmaid at the wedding,’ Lauri smiled shakily.

Jane put up a hand to her tousled hair. ‘Laurence really wants to see me, after all this time?’

‘He’s never stopped loving you.’ Lauri pushed her in the direction of Laurence’s room. ‘Now go on—Mum. That might take a bit of time to get used to,’ she laughed, ‘but I’ll get the hang of it.’

Jane looked at her anxiously. ‘You don’t have to, you know. I don’t deserve—’

‘I want to,’ Lauri told her firmly. ‘Unless you would rather I didn’t?’

‘I’d like it,’ Jane admitted shyly. ‘All this time and I’ve had to pretend the casual relationship of an aunt, to actually have you as my daughter will be—breathtaking.’

‘Why did you—No,’ Lauri shook her head, ‘it doesn’t matter. We can talk later, when you’ve spoken to Lau—my father.’ She couldn’t quite bring herself to call him ‘Dad’, although she thought that too might come in time.

‘I know what you were going to ask,’ Jane said dully. ‘And I’d like to answer you now, before I speak to Laurence. I want you to try and understand, both of you, that I was very young, and—and pregnant by a man I felt had betrayed me in the worst way possible. My parents were wonderful, they stood by me all during my pregnancy, and when you were born they loved you as much as I did. But I’m jumping ahead slightly, missing out the most important part. When we realised Laurence wasn’t going to leave me alone I
went to stay with my brother and his wife. Robert and Adele had been married for years, but they couldn’t have a family of their own.’

Lauri gasped. ‘Was that why—?’

‘No, I didn’t give you away to them,’ her mother told her firmly. ‘When I brought you home, to their home, I could see Adele was more interested in you than she should have been, but at the time I saw no harm in it. Then my parents were killed. It was as if my prop had been taken out from under me. I fell apart, completely. I had a nervous breakdown. The authorities agreed that Robert and Adele should look after you until I was well enough to. It was almost eighteen months later before I felt able to cope with being a mother without a supportive husband. By that time it was too late, you had already accepted Robert and Adele as your parents, you even called them Mummy and Daddy. They were wrong to let that happen, but I think they longed for a child of their own so much that they didn’t think they were doing any harm. I had no choice but to become your aunt, although I always intended you to know the truth one day.’