Flare (14 page)

As soon as it was dark out, Hugo had stripped, unsurprisingly, and jumped off the end of the dock.

“Always skinny-dipping, aren’t you?” Kevin joked.

“Always following me in, aren’t you?” Hugo looked up at Kevin who was still standing on the dock fully clothed. It was so dark out, just a sliver of the moon and tiny pinpricks of stars dotting the sky. Kevin could barely see Hugo from the nipples down because he was treading water. His pale body floating atop the dark surface was another story altogether, and moments after that thought flew through Kevin’s mind, he was dropping his clothes to the wooden dock.

Kevin jumped in the cool water and swam close to Hugo, then wrapped his arms and legs around his torso so Hugo was forced to tread water for both of them. Hugo drifted closer to shore and was soon planting both feet on the lakebed rather than struggling against the water. He held on to Kevin’s ass, holding him up, pulling him in tighter.

“I
am
always following you, you know that?” Kevin said.

“I’ve noticed, but why?” Hugo gave him a sly, sweet smile.

“Something about you always knowing where you’re going or some such nonsense.” Kevin smirked as he tugged on Hugo’s North Star pendant.

“Mmm.” Hugo started kissing him in the open water. “I want to do nasty things to you,” he breathed into Kevin’s mouth.

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Have sex in public?”

“We already did that.” Kevin laughed at the memory of the balcony.

“Okay, suck on your tits until you come?”

“Sounds nice, but I think we’d have better luck if I did the sucking on yours.” Kevin pinched one of his nipples and felt Hugo’s already hard cock bounce under his ass in response. “See? You love it when I play with your tits.”

“I do,” Hugo said with a kiss. “I really, really do. How about I spank you?”

“You already tried that, love. Not a fan. Are we already getting to the boring bread-and-butter sex? Seriously? It’s been a year and we’re just going to fuck in the missionary position for the rest of our lives?”

“Nah.” Hugo sucked at Kevin’s lower lip and released his body so he slid down until his feet rested on the sandy lake bottom. “Nothing like that. Not that that’s a bad thing. It’s not like we have a dull sex life.”

“Are you sure?” Kevin asked, not quite convinced. “What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve done?”

“I’m not sure you really want to know that,” Hugo said, pulling back a little.

“I do, though.”

“You first.” Hugo nodded.

“You were there for it. You and Erin. The three of us in the ocean when she told me to touch you while she watched. That was it,” Kevin said with a pop of his brow. He’d had mostly vanilla sex his entire life. Prior to that, sex with Hugo had been the kinkiest thing he’d done. “I’m a bit boring, I know.”

“Not boring. Not in the least, but after hearing that, I’m
sure
I shouldn’t tell you.”

“Oh come on. It can’t be that bad, can it?”

Hugo quickly looked away. “What’s with truth time in the water with you?”

“Last time we were honest in the water, Erin initiated that, not me,” Kevin reminded.

“That’s right.”

“Stop stalling, Hugo.”

Hugo released a noisy breath through his nose. His gaze darted around the dark water for a few seconds before finally settling on Kevin. He looked so serious. “I did it once and decided I never wanted to do it again. I was in college. It was stupid, and I felt like shit about it.”

“Stop,” Kevin said. “I don’t want you to tell me things you’re ashamed of. That’s not why I asked. I thought it would just be fun to hear about something different.”

“No, it’s okay. It’s what made me realize I was a relationship guy, and why I was able to skip out on a lot of the baby-gay bullshit I watched my friends go through.”

“Baby gay?” Kevin asked, not entirely sure if he heard Hugo correctly, but the visual it brought to mind made him laugh.

“Oh, you know how when some guys come out, it’s like they turn into sex fiends. They’re no longer hiding. They’d fuck anything with a cock and an ass, and soon their lives turn into this sex-focused haze that brings absolutely nothing to them beyond sexual climax. Every situation is a possible hookup to them. In the end, most of the guys I knew who did this felt even more empty and lost than before they came out, but it was like they needed to get all that pent-up repression out of their systems. I could’ve easily been on that path, but something stopped me before I got started. Of course, I ended up with a slew of shitty boyfriends, but at least I didn’t end up living in a haze looking for my next trick.”

“Wow.” Kevin couldn’t help the compassion he felt for Hugo, drawing him closer and just holding him as they swayed together with the waves. “I know we lived different lives after high school, but I didn’t know things were that different. I was coddled in comparison to what you just described.”

“It wasn’t that bad. Some of my friends call those their greatest days. I stayed away from most of it. I went to the one party that changed my perspective.”

“Did you get hurt?” Kevin had to know.

“No, it was just sex. But
a lot
of sex with a lot of different people.”

“Did you know them?”

Kevin could feel Hugo shaking his head against his neck, so he pulled back to look into his blue eyes. “Not really. I knew the guy who told me about the party. He was my boyfriend, and then he wasn’t after that night. Hey. Stop looking at me like that.”

Kevin smoothed his features.

“I was there by choice, and I didn’t do anything I didn’t want to. At least not right there in that moment. It was more the aftereffects. I felt like I’d been used. It wasn’t a feeling I ever wanted to feel again. Unfortunately, I had this horrible habit of dating semiabusive guys, so I ended up being a fuck toy again.”

“Semiabusive? What do you mean? Did anyone hit you?”

“No. Well, yes. But it was usually verbal or emotional shit. People demeaning me and belittling me for various reasons, like when I told them I was an actor. I still get that, even from friends and strangers. With the boyfriends it was worse after they found out I did drag. A lot of gay boys are drag-phobic when it comes to someone they’re dating. Going out to enjoy a show filled with queens is a totally different thing. I’m not that open with it because of the shit that’s happened in the past, but I’m far from ashamed of Cherrie and what I do. You know that already.”

“Have you ever had sex as Cherrie?” Kevin asked, curiosity piqued.

“No.”

“Wearing a bra and panties?”

“No.”

“Lipstick?”

“Why are you asking me this?” Hugo looked flustered and ready to dart toward the shore.

“Because, I….” Kevin took a deep breath and slowly let it out, tightening his grip to make sure Hugo didn’t run. “I might like that,” he whispered, closing his eyes against Hugo’s reaction because he feared it so much.

When Kevin finally opened his eyes, it was to see Hugo looking at him cautiously, studying him. “You’re serious, aren’t you? You’re not just saying that to see if I’ll go along with it?”

“I am serious. I’ve told you before, it’s like I get the best of both worlds with you. You’re all man, but you have this feminine side that turns me on so much. That’s not exactly something I can share with anyone. I think Erin would’ve even had a hard time with that desire, and you know how open she was to things.”

“Wow,” Hugo said, covering his mouth. “Sure, I’ve had guys hit on me after performances or they talk shit about fucking Cherrie. They’re usually straight and drunk and very into that sort of thing. It’s their kink, but it’s so far from mine. This is… different, to say the least, because I’ve never had anyone I’ve been with really and truly admit anything like this to me. It’s usually just the opposite.”

“Fuck. Jesus, Hugo. I can’t say a damned thing right tonight.”

“No. I’m not equating you with those guys. That’s not what I mean. I just haven’t had the best track record with boyfriends and drag. Most guys can’t wrap their heads around it. They make it a bigger deal than it needs to be, and it ends up getting in the way of our relationship in one way or another. Secrecy was easier most of the time, and I always made sure to date guys who liked me as a boy even more than they liked me as a ladyboy.”

“I’m fucking this up even more,” Kevin said, looking down at the water in shame.

“Look at me.” Hugo smoothed his palm over Kevin’s ear and down his neck, not speaking again until Kevin met his eyes. “That’s not what I’m saying. I was actually trying to show you how different your intentions sound to me, but I need you to know where I’m coming from too. It’s scary. Cherrie is strong but some of the things I’ve heard as her have been harsh and cruel, so I protect her. Relentlessly.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have admitted that to you.” Kevin felt like utter shit. He should’ve thought about the implications of his words before they spilled out his mouth where he couldn’t re-gather them and burn them away. “Just forget I said anything, if you can. Please?”

“I don’t want to, Kevin. I’m not saying I’m ready to go there with you, but I know you’re not like any of those other guys have been.”

“Let’s go in,” Kevin said, suddenly feeling defeated and very exhausted. “I’m tired.” He gave Hugo a little smile, but from the look in Hugo’s eyes, it wasn’t the smile he’d tried to portray. “Come on. Let’s go kiss forever,” he said, hoping to divert the conversation and move on quickly.

“Not sure I can turn that down,” Hugo said with a warm smile as he glided away and reached for his clothes on the dock.

Hugo didn’t bother covering himself as he walked away, and Kevin was mesmerized by the subtle bounce of Hugo’s tight ass as he headed toward the house. Kevin pulled himself out of the water, gathered his clothes, and kept staring until Hugo disappeared behind the outdoor shower. Kevin followed his lead and didn’t take the time to dress either, piling his clothes beside Hugo’s on a low table.

The moonlight lit up Hugo’s skin as water tumbled over him in the slate shower enclosure; he looked alien, almost blue. Beautiful. His hair shone blue-black. His mouth was lush, lips parted as Hugo tipped his head back to rinse his hair.

Kevin couldn’t help but stare, but he wanted to be closer. He slipped his fingers into Hugo’s hair and helped him, taking the time to kiss across the expanse of throat his position put on display.

Hugo moaned. “Feels great.” Then he pulled away and made room so Kevin could get under the warm cascade. “Get all that sand and silt washed away,” he said in a low, rumbly voice. Kevin’s body responded, and he felt his cock swell.

“Will you touch me?” Kevin begged.

“Not yet. Inside. But give me a few?” Hugo asked as stepped out of the spray to grab a fluffy towel. Kevin watched as he rubbed it all over that pale skin. “I promised my mom I’d call.”

“What for?”

Hugo smirked. “I said I’d give her Russell’s license plate number. She has a good friend who’s a park ranger up at the Boundary Waters.” He motioned with his head as he said, “I’ll be inside.”

Kevin felt his heart swell with gratitude as Hugo stepped into the golden glow from the house and disappeared. He really knew how to read Kevin, but Kevin wasn’t sure he was nearly as good at reading him.

Kevin reached for the shampoo so Hugo would have enough time to talk to his mom, content to lather, rinse, repeat before finding the conditioner. When he grabbed the bottle of body wash, his mind was well on the way to wandering.

He thought of how Hugo’s face had looked when they’d been caught having sex on the balcony. He’d looked excited by the fact that people had been looking up at them. What else had Kevin been missing? Hugo had just said he wanted to do nasty things.

It sounded as though Hugo had been to an orgy. Was that what he’d described? And the videos. Hugo had e-mailed links to short clips of porn while he’d been off working in New York or LA.

The first link Hugo had sent, Kevin opened at work, only to be shocked by what he saw. He helplessly stabbed at his keyboard and speakers until the moaning stopped and the video quit.

“Warn a guy next time,” he’d texted right away. Hugo had felt horrid for not putting a NSFW note in the subject line.

And there
was
a next time. Kevin waited until he got home and had the kids well settled until he checked that link out. It was a video of a beefy dude tying a thinner guy up in ropes. Kevin watched in fascination as the smaller guy was blindfolded and trussed up in the most beautiful knot work Kevin had ever seen. When the big guy brought out a whip, Kevin realized just how simple and vanilla he was when it came to sex.

Hugo sent several videos. Sometimes it was two guys kissing and sometimes it was guys having their way with each other. He said he sent them just for fun and masturbation material.

The videos had certainly shown Kevin some kinks he never knew existed and helped him come to the understanding that he really enjoyed watching men kiss. Kevin’s “truth time in the water” question was mostly playful curiosity, but after hearing Hugo’s answer, he saw the question had probably been laced in insecurity too.

The most recent video Hugo sent was titled
Breath Play with Jordan
. Kevin had had no clue what to expect when he’d opened it. The video wasn’t long, but this Jordan was having his air rationed as he was fucked. He seemed to get off on it, but it had confused Kevin.

It really confused him now as he dried off and prepared to go back in the lake house. Maybe Hugo wanted to actually try that stuff. Could Kevin even manage to treat Hugo like that?

He doubted he could stomach it.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Right Now, Back Then

K
EVIN
WALKED
into the illuminated great room and saw Hugo resting nude on his side in front of the fireplace. He was on the soft, cream-colored rug and turned as soon as he heard Kevin enter.

“You done talking to your mom?” Kevin asked.

“Yeah. She’s calling Judy, her park ranger friend. She’ll make sure the kids are safe.”