Flutter (The Discover Series) (15 page)

Flutter

Five

We all fall down

Sara

“Don’t move!” he whispered to me.

Even if I could have fathomed moving – wanting too, needing too or trying too, were completely out of the question. I was frozen in place, staring into eyes that were somehow familiar to me. I didn’t realize exactly when it happened, but Andres had moved into a crouched position in front of me, guarding me from the presumably dangerous unknown. I peeked around his shoulder, stretching out my neck, until I was staring into those piercing blue eyes. My breath caught as he stared back at me. He was completely unfazed by the big man standing as a human shield between us, ready to sacrifice his life for mine, even though I somehow knew that wasn’t going to be necessary.

I couldn’t tell what was making it harder to breathe: the wolf standing a few feet away from us, or that dull hum that was now sending my body’s responses out of control. I wanted to pretend that it was fear pumping through my blood, and sending shivers over my body, but it turned out I wasn’t very good at lying to myself. I tried to tell myself that it was pure adrenaline, from what should seem like a deadly situation that had my feet moving around Andres and closer
toward
the wolf, who had yet to take his eyes away from me. Andres whispered my name in a frantic attempt to stop me.

“What are you doing?” he whispered.

I could see Andres out of the corner of my vision.  He was staring at me, shocked, and somewhat…amazed.  Part of me wondered if he was able to
feel
the electric surge I was giving off.

How could he not?
I thought to myself. It was consuming me, burning me alive. I could swear sparks were shooting out through my fingertips, trying to escape before my body ignited.

“It’s okay,” I said confidently, because I believed it. “He’s not going to hurt us.”

“Since when did you become a wolf whisperer?” he joked.

I didn’t stop walking until I was standing directly in front of the
huge
creature, although the word huge seemed to be in description to correctly depict the size of the animal standing in front of me. The tilt in the earth had played tricks on me, and I realized the wolf was so much bigger than what was normal
.
 
But his size still didn’t have me trembling for cover. Despite his size, I didn’t need to adjust my height to look into his eyes. He stood perfectly at eye level with me. He didn’t flinch when I stepped close to him; he was clearly not afraid of me either.

I wanted to reach out and touch him, I even lifted my hand to put my intentions into motion – I was surprised by the steadiness of my fingers- but my hesitation caused me to pause long enough to lose my nerve; My fingers curled into my palm. I didn’t want to push my luck, so I slowly dropped my hand and reminded myself to breath. He was tolerating my closeness, but just because I wasn’t afraid didn’t change the fact that he was still a wild animal.

I had to resist the urge to run my fingers through his fur, which looked like bronze silk, by bawling my hands into fists so tight that I could feel my nails cutting into my palm. He let out a little grunt and I jumped at the noise. I could see his chest expanding as he drew in a deep breath, and I heard the low growl as it escaped his muzzle. Something in his eyes changed for a second, they got darker,
wilder
, and I took a cautious step back.

“Sara,” Andres said, in warning.

It lasted less than a minute and then the look was different, almost apologetic. It was then that I realized I was probably reading far too much into this animal. I hated that everything I did and felt, made me feel like I should be committed
to an institution. I wanted desperately to look away, to move away, but I wanted even more to stay right where I was. I could see another rise and fall in his chest, and I knew he was breathing in my scent again. I wondered what he could smell. Could he sense that I was different? Animals had a sixth sense, right? Could he feel the currents of energy I was emanating?

I was momentarily blinded by a curtain of black hair. The wind raged unexpectedly, sending midnight strands of my hair in every direction. The spell was broken. I turned my head, trying to catch my uncooperative hair into a ponytail with my fist. I fell back a few steps in the process. When I had all the lose ends caught up, I shivered as the cold air swirled around me. Andres was suddenly behind me, draping the blanket over my shoulders, and I pulled it tightly around me. I hadn’t remembered dropping it.

When I looked up, the wolf was staring at Andres now.  I tilted my head
back to see if Andres had noticed.
H
e had and was staring back. It was a brief exchange, and then Andres was looking back at me.

“We have to keep moving.” He said.  Before I could say anything, the wolf turned and slowly started walking.

“Where is he going?” I blurted out. I was feeling so many things as I watched him walk away, and I took a few steps in his direction because I couldn’t help it.  I was being pulled
toward
him.

“I don’t know, but he seems familiar enough with humans, so maybe we should follow him. He might know where some shelter is.”

“Do you think?” I asked hopefully.

As if he understood, the wolf turned
toward
us, his eyes finding mine. I wasn’t a wolf whisperer, but I felt like I could read his expression. That was all I needed, I walked forward, following him. Seconds later I could hear Andres following us both.

When he caught up to me I asked, “Do you think he has an owner?”

“No Sara. Owner or not, he belongs
here
. This is his home.”

“I was just asking.” I mumbled. I wanted to argue with him, challenge his statement, but he was right. Even though adoption
had
crossed my mind, there was no way he would fit in at home. It had been a silly idea.

Andre
s
’
, and the wolf’s pace got faster as we walked through the woods, but I was far too distracted by everything to even try to keep up with them. I had a good feeling that the wolf knew exactly where he was taking us, that made me feel a lot better.

I tried to decide if it was weird taking directions from a
wolf
, but I decided it probably wasn’t any different then taking directions from a dog. I probably would have followed the wolf no matter what; it felt like he was the one walking me, pulling me along on an invisible leash.

I studied him privately from the back of the line; I didn’t need the light to observe him. His fur was a dark brown, not really black, but it was dark. It had hints of red and copper around his neck, and along his spine. His was etched in my memory. I had taken enough mental pictures to last me a life time.

Those almond shaped eyes were surrounded by long, dark lashes, and the actual color of his eyes was something I would
never
forget. The shade of blue was so striking that I had a hard time believing they were real. The pale, ice blue seemed to be custom made for only him. I could clearly see electrical sparks that flowed from the center of his eyes, and a light brown color flamed out from the pupil, followed by a few loose, brown specks that floated inside the iris. I knew that I would never again see blue eyes like this, for as long as I lived. I had thought the ocean I had dreamt up earlier was beautiful, but his unique eyes put it to shame.

Everything about this creature was breath taking. His size made him seem mythical, but that added to his appeal. It was strange being so close to such a wild animal, that most people had only ever seen in books, and not be afraid of him. Obviously my insanity had no limitations, and that made me somewhat careless I guess, but it was exhilarating being so close to him.

As if my life at the moment needed any more excitement.

I realized then, that I had automatically assumed that he was a
he.
There had been no doubt in my mind that he was male. The way he sauntered ahead of me screamed alpha male. The way he held himself, and the fierce look in his eyes, were all very telling signs to me. It had never occurred to me to think he was anything other male.

Why was I so captivated by this animal?

I didn’t have time to analyze my obsession before I nearly collided into Andres’ back. I had been so wrapped up in my thoughts, that I didn’t even notice what had caught his interest, and he was blocking my path.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, sidestepping his halted form, and that’s when I saw it.

A shed

It sat at the bottom of the hill, not far from us, and I wanted to jump up and down, and scream with joy, but I was so exhausted that I probably would have just dropped to my knees.

We weren’t going to freeze to death!

I managed to create a simple smile that spread across my face –informing me that my lips were chapped and dry.

I wasn’t surprised to find the wolf staring at me; in truth I could feel his eyes on me the whole time I had been standing here, watching me as closely as I had watched him, and I wondered what he saw. My eyes met his in the darkness; they were like beacons of light. He sat there, his chest puffed out with a sense of pride, gratified in my extreme pleasure of the shelter he had brought us to. I wanted to tell him ‘Thank you’ over and over again. I wanted to touch him, to pet his silky fur.  I wanted to know what it felt like under my fingers, but I was afraid to scare him away, and I didn’t want to freak Andres out.  I wanted to keep him forever, but I couldn’t. There were so many things that I wanted, but couldn’t have.

“Do you think anyone
lives
there?” I asked,

“I don’t know, but there is only one way to find out.”

Andres started moving toward the shed, walking past the wolf, and I started to follow in his steps until I realized the wolf wasn’t following us. I turned around and he sat, unmoving, his eyes still focused on me. I seemed to get lost in the never-ending depths of his blue eyes, and I knew mine were pleading with him to follow us. I wasn’t quite ready to give him up yet. I felt safer with him around, but instead of moving
toward
us, he gracefully laid down, crossing one long paw over the other. His eyes never wavered from mine as he switched positions.

I wanted to be stubborn, and stand there until he got the message and followed me. But there was something unyielding about his eyes, and Andres was still moving for the shed. I wanted to stomp my feet, pout a little, or a lot.  But mostly I
just felt like crying, and that freaked me out. So instead, I forcefully tore my gaze away from him, and hurried down the mountain. I was feeling strangely empty, which made me want to cry even more.

I heard the dark howl echo around me before getting lost in the night.

I couldn’t be sure, but it sounded like he felt exactly the way I did.

Adan

I sat there watching her in the dark.

             
Keeping my distance at this point seemed to be safer for the both of us, and as much of it as I could possibly stand.  But as I watched her walk further down the side of mountain, with every step she took, she seemed to take all of my oxygen away with her, and I started to rethink the limits of my self control. Not that I really had much control over anything when I was close to her. The pressure of her presence seemed to fill the space around me.  I lost all my ability to act with reason, rather than emotion.

             
My mind idled slowly through the images of her, endlessly displaying them over and over again, on a projection screen behind my eyes. I wondered if I would ever again have a single thought that didn’t ultimately end with her.

She was my curse.

The wind thrashed, and at this height there was nothing to absorb the extreme force of its impact.  It was almost deadly, as it disturbed the branches and leaves around me. I shifted slightly on the branch I was occupying, and it quivered beneath my weight. My nostrils flared as the familiar smell that had lingered on me, staining my fur, pirouetted through the wind around me.  I was suddenly intoxicated by her sent, and felt intensely lightheaded.

My nails dug into the branch, peeling the already cracking bark, from the trunk. I secured my position, and a low growl tried to break past lips in protest. I didn’t need to watch the broken pieces of the falling tree to remind myself that it was a long way down, and I had no intentions of leaving this tree unless it was by the same way I had come up. Since spouting wings and flying wasn’t an option for me, I made sure I wasn’t going to land head first on the unforgiving ground, before I let her capture my attention again.

It didn’t take long for my thoughts to become lost to her again.