Forever and Always (31 page)

Melanie smiled at her Mom and nervously glanced toward the direction of the bathroom.

Simon returned to the table and Melanie cringed when she spotted his ruined shirt. If there was one thing Simon was fussy about it was his clothes. He had more clothes than any other person she knew. She knew he was angry when he returned. He had a big smile on his face but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

Everyone returned to their dinner in silence. Melanie glanced up at her Dad and he gave her an encouraging smile and a wink. She thought of Sam and wished she was with him right then and there.

After dinner they all sat and looked at pictures of Sarah and Tom’s trip when Tom attached the laptop to the TV. Melanie was now only drinking water as she was only allowing herself one glass of wine with her dinner as she was driving even though Simon now had most of that glass dried into his ruined shirt. She excused herself to go and use the bathroom. When she finished in the bathroom room, instead of returning to the others in the living room she turned and walked into her old bedroom. It was just as she left it.

The same pale furniture and the lavender curtains and bedclothes she had loved. Her Justin Timberlake posters on her wall and the Pussy Cat dolls poster behind her door. She sat down on her bed and took a deep breath. She wondered how long it would be before she would be able to come and sit in her room again. She wondered if she ever would. Maybe her Mom would never speak to her again for just running away and not telling the truth to her face. But she knew her Dad was right. She knew he was afraid her Mom would say something she didn’t really mean and they would fall out just like he and Melanie had all those years ago.  She thought about their argument. How stupid she had been. She knew he had only ever wanted the best for her.
Even now.
She was amazed by her father’s support. She knew it was hard for him because he didn’t want her to leave and she knew he would have a lot of questions to answer but he just wanted her to be happy.

“Hey” Alex’s voice startled her. She looked up and saw him standing in the doorway. “Can I come in?”

“Of course” she said and smiled as she moved over on the bed so he could sit next to her.

“How are you doing?” he asked.

“I’m doing ok” she replied. “I just wish Saturday would hurry up and get here. I don’t know how much more of this pretence I can deal with”.

“Are you nervous about going with Sam” Alex asked looking straight into her eyes.

“No” she replied. “That’s the one thing I am not nervous about. The one thing I have been sure about for the last seven years is just how much I love Sam”.

“I am so happy your dreams are finally coming through kiddo” Alex said pulling Melanie closer to him. “I am sure Sam was shocked when you told him about you ...you know...losing the baby and all”.

Melanie didn’t reply. What could she say?

“Melanie you have told him about what happened” Alex asked.

Melanie shook her head.

“Why ever not” Alex asked, the surprise clear in his voice.

“I guess I was afraid he would change his mind” she said suddenly feeling as small and vulnerable as she did all those years ago. “I can’t give him everything he wants and I am afraid he won’t want me anymore”.

“Mel that boy is 100% crazy in love with you” Alex replied. “But you need to tell him the truth. He won’t thank you for keeping this from him”.

“I promise I will tell him” she replied she knew she could put it off no longer.

“Here you are” Sarah said from the door way making the both jump with fright. “We were wondering where you both got to”.

“We just having a Father/ Daughter chat” Alex said standing up. “Come on kiddo, our public
awaits
”.

Melanie laughed and followed her Mom and Dad down the hallway.

An hour later Melanie and Simon said their goodbye and headed home.

“Where are you going” Simon asked as Melanie signalled for the turn for the motor way and not continuing on straight to her apartment.

“I am bringing you home” she explained. She hadn’t yet told Simon she wasn’t spending the night with him.

He didn’t reply and they drove the rest of the way in silence. She could feel him glare at her from time to time. She knew he was waiting for her to say she wasn’t staying and he was going to freak out.

When they reached his apartment she pulls up outside and turns to him expectantly.

“You’re not coming in are you” he said calmly much to Melanie’s surprise.

“I have to go to the airport early to collect Katie” she explained. “I wouldn’t have to get up quite so early if I go home”.

“I could come home with you” he suggest but his tone said he already knew the answer.

“Simon I have such I busy day tomorrow” she lied. “I just want to go home and sleep. I will see you on Saturday”.

Melanie jammed her nails into the side of her leg to stop herself from crying. Right in that moment she hated herself completely and utterly. She couldn’t even bring herself to look at him anymore. He leaned over and kissed her softly on the cheek.

“Have a great night tomorrow night” he whispered. “I will see you on Saturday after work”.

“Ok” she said and with every ounce of strength she had she gave him the warmest smile she could even though inside her heart was breaking. She knew she wasn’t in love with him. She had known that for a long time. But she loved him. He was one of her best friends and she was going to hurt him so badly.

He opened the car and stepped out and walked to the curb and waited for her to drive away. And right in that moment she realised she would probably never see him again.

Suddenly she flung open the car door and in one sweeping movement she was out of the car. She ran around the car and threw her arms around him and kissed him firmly on the lips.

“I love you Simon” she whispered. And she did, she really did but just not enough.

“Love you Mel” he whispered and he held her so close.

She knew she was going to cry and she didn’t want him to see so she kissed his cheek and walked back to the car.

She climbed in, putting the car into gear and pulled away. She watched him in her rear view mirror as she drove down the street. He just stood on the path with one hand held up as a goodbye and a strange look on his face. It was like he knew.

Finally she could let the tears flow.

When she reached Sam’s apartment it was with a heavy heart that she knocked on the door. When he opened the door and saw her standing there he quickly pulled her into his arm and she began to sob.

“I will never see him again” she sobbed. “I am going to break his heart and it feels awful”.

“I know” he sighed and pulled her closer to him. “I know you never wanted to hurt him”.

“He was my friend” she cried. She could still see his face as she drove away from and the memory made her cry harder.

“I am sorry you are losing your friend” Sam whispered sincerely, trying to show he understood what she meant. He knew she wished more than anything else that for her to be happy that it didn’t mean she had to hurt Simon in the process. He wished that too. Simon was a nice guy and Sam really liked him. But he loved Melanie and this was the only way they could be together.

He swept her up in his arms and she buried her face in his shoulder and sobbed harder. He carried her to his bed and lay her down then switched off the light and climbed in next to her pulling her to him and holding her until she cried herself to sleep.

As Melanie stood in Dublin airport on the Friday morning waiting for Katie to appear through the arrivals hall, she thought about her morning with Sam.

She had been woken up to him lying next to
her ,
watching her. He gave her the most amazing smile as she turned over to look so she could meet his gaze.

“You have to stop watching me sleep” she said and returns his smile brightly.

“How are you doing this morning” he asked as he leaned forward and kissed her softly on the lips.

“Better” she replied honestly. “I am sorry for being such a pathetic mess”.

“You stop this right now” he said angrily. “You wouldn’t be the girl I love if you could just coldly walk away from him and didn’t even blink. You have a good heart.
A heart that I love more than anything else in the world.
You know that, right?”

Melanie replied to that statement with a kiss. Sam returned her kiss and he rolled on top of her and pressed her into the mattress. He brushed his tongue along her bottom lip asked for entrance to her mouth which she gave him happily.

As his tongue tenderly stroked hers, he reached down and pulled up her dress, which she was still wearing, slowly up her body breaking his kiss finally to pull the dress over her head. He kissed her softly once more before he slowly worked his way down her body, kissing her lightly on her soft sallow skin. Stopping briefly as he pulled her bra cups down and kissing each nipple in turn making them pucker with his touch.

Then he slowly continued his journey down her body, until he reached her belly button. He softly dipped his tongue into her belly button and the feeling was exquisite, making her cry out in pure pleasure. But before she could even process the desire thundering through her body, he continued on his journey until he finally reached the rim of her panties.
Running his tongue excruciatingly slow along the tip of her panties then allowing his tongue to slide down over them until there is nothing between his tongue and her clitoris but the delicate lace of her underwear.

Hooking his fingers inside her panties he slowly slid them down her legs. His eyes held hers until he returned to the journey he was taking on her body. He softly kissed her inner tight and continued on down until he reached the inside of her knee.

Flicking his eyes back up at her before his mouth found the inside of her other knee. But this time worked his way back up her inner tight.

She knew where this was going and she wanted him so badly. As his mouth finally reached its destination, she reached down and grabbed his hair and called out his name. As he worked slowly on her clitoris with his mouth he sank his fingers inside her.

“OH SWEET LORD” she screamed as the pleasure consumed her and she came loudly as he continued his sweet torture.

Suddenly he pulled away and quickly moved his way back up her body and reclaimed her mouth. He quickly slid his legs between hers and with one movement he lost himself inside her.

“God I love you so much” he groaned as he withdrew from her halfway before he slammed back into her. “I love your body”.

His continued on with long, slow strokes until she could feel the build up again. She tilted her hips and matched him thrust for thrust until she could hold back no longer and once again she was freefalling from a high ridge of pleasure. She could feel him still and pulse inside her as he too found his release.

“Jesus Melanie” he exclaimed breathlessly. “What you do to me. You are amazing”.

“Eh wake up sleepy head” Katie’s voice snapped Melanie out of her erotic day dream.  Melanie threw her arms in surprise around her friend. “Jesus you look like you’ve been at it all night. Simon really needs to save something for the honey moon”.

“Get your mind out of the gutter Morgan” Melanie replied and laughed. “How was your flight?”

“Long and very boring” Katie sighs as she tried to navigate her way through Dublin Airport. “But I managed to sleep for a few hours so once I have a quick shower I will be good as new for the fitting”.

They reached Melanie’s car and loaded Katie bags into the boot.

“I could have sworn there was only one case when I dropped you off two weeks ago” Melanie said as she tried to squeeze the fourth bag into the back of her little hatch back.

“Melanie you can’t spend two weeks in New York without hitting the shops” Katie announced. “Mind you my poor credit card was used more than a hooker on a good nights work”.

Melanie dissolved in laughter. She loved Katie’s way of putting things. She always made her smile.

“But I found the most fabulous dress for tonight” Katie continued. “Wait till you see it, you are going to die”.

They drove back to Katie’s apartment in Malahide and after she had a quick shower and got changed they were on the way to the dressmakers for Katie’s fitting.

It was hard for Melanie sitting there listening to Katie’s oohs and aahs about the dress. She went on and on about how she couldn’t wait to strut her stuff in the dress and how she hoped the best man and grooms man
were
hot doctors. When Melanie told her that the best man was Simon’s brother Will who wasn’t a doctor but in fact a solicitor. Katie squealed with excitement and Melanie plastered a smile on her face because she knew none of it really mattered because the wedding was never going to happen.

By the time they got back to Katie’s apartment, Melanie was emotionally exhausted. She slumped into an armchair while Katie filled the kettle to make coffee and disappeared into her bedroom.

While Katie was gone, Melanie quickly slipped her phone from her pocket and she smiled when she saw a message from Sam.