Forgive Me (24 page)

              My stomach turns at what she says, because she is completely right on the ball, and I don’t think I saw it that way until she just brought it all up.

              “So let’s have another drink and when this is gone, you can call up mystery man from two weeks ago, and you can have an all nighter with him.”

              Then my stomach churns for a whole new reason. “Um, that isn’t a good idea. I’d rather not.”

              “Come on, why not? You haven’t even told me who he is, anyways.” She brings the straw back to her lips and starts to sip on the drink, looking at me curiously.

              I look down at the table. “You don’t even want to know.”

              “Oh, come on, Lex, we never used to have secrets.”

              I sigh and mumble out, “Your brother.”

              Bray starts coughing and has to place her drink back down, coughing even harder and trying so hard not to laugh. I stare at her ashamed of my admittance. When she is able to breathe correctly, she glares at me but in a comical way. “You hoochie flavored Popsicle! I should hate you for that. But I can’t, because I’m proud of you for having a one-nighter. And with someone somewhat normal.”

              I look down again and fiddle with my hands, mumbling out, “Three.”

              “Three, what?”

              “Three times.” I’m so embarrassed, I can’t even look at her.

              She all of a sudden starts laughing. “Well damn. I’m going to slap him upside the head next time I see him, but good for you! So even though I’m slightly distrubed discussing my brother, why can’t you go for it again? Or find someone new?”

              I look back over at her, still ashamed. “It just wasn’t right. It wasn’t what I wanted. Or rather, who I wanted. It was… nice… but it wasn’t-“

              “Zander.”

              “Right.”

              “But sweetie,” she says, reaching over to cup her hand over the back of mine. “It never will be. And I’m sorry for that, because we know he deserves better than Emerson, but you need to move on. You have to. This isn’t healthy.”

              I finish off my drink and the only thing I say back is, “I want another now.”

              I’ve never felt this way. I thought I had been drunk before, but this… no, this is drunk. Apparently I’ve only ever been buzzed before. And this isn’t good. I feel like I own the universe, I feel invincible, I feel beautiful and outgoing. I feel boundless! But I know that if I keep going, I’ll be sick, and all the exuberance I feel right now will disappear!

              But until then, I sure as heck am going to enjoy myself.

              Bray and I got into fun talk and finished up two more drinks. The bartender dropped off one more in front of me, but with the first sip I felt off and knew it was my cut off point. I’m done drinking and I’m just going to enjoy my drunken state.

              These two guys joined our table a little while ago, and we’ve been asking them random, dumb questions. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in my life. It’s to the point that every time I chuckle, I feel crampy, but I don’t care. I needed this, especially today.

              “So, if you had could have one superpower, what would it be?” I ask them.

              The one with a blonde faux hawk is the first to answer. “I’d have the ability to understand women. They’re confusing creatures.”

              I glare at him. “We’re not confusing. We love romance and sex and to be put first. You get those down, you understand women.”

              He grins. “I wish it were so easy.”

              The second guy with black buzzed hair goes next. This guy makes me laugh the most, there is just something about him, like a natural personality that flows. The sparkle in his gray eyes makes it known he is about to say something perverted. “My superpower would be able to play the guitar and sing well.”

              “Wait, that isn’t perverted,” I blurt out loud.

              He laughs and says, “Well you didn’t ask me why.”

              “Oh, right. Okay, why would that be your superpower? Its kind of a dumb power.”

              He leans forward and says huskily. “Panties drop in an instant when a guy is on stage, playing his guitar and singing to the audience. Its as if every girl out there things he is singing just for them. Rock stars are Gods, seriously, they can get laid easier than Hugh Heffner. Yeah, if I had a superpower, it’d certainly to have that ability.”

              See? I can’t help but laugh. I wish this guy were my best friend.

              “You’re a pig, but that is why I like you,” Bray says to him.

              He leans back in his chair, placing his hands behind his head. “Yeah, well, its honesty.” He winks in my direction and I can’t help but blush just a little. Not that you can even tell, since the alcohol has sort of turned my face and neck a pink hue anyways.

              “Your turn,” I tell Bray.

              She thinks on it for a moment. “I’d be invisible.”

              “Boring,” I tell her.

              “No, not boring. Can you imagine how rich I’d be? I could turn invisible, rob banks or dumbasses. Oh the life I’d have.”

              I cock my head at her. “Aren’t you rich already?”

              She waves a hand in my direction. “I’m above average, probably, but rich? No. Hell no. I want to be a billionaire.”

              I just laugh and think about what my superpower would be. I honestly don’t have an idea in mind of what I’d want for a power. Theirs were all good ones, and pretty unique. Or their reasoning at least is unique. Me, well, I just always wanted to be able to fly, but now that just sounds dumb.

              “Come on, you’re next,” Bray says.

              “Okay, well, if I had
any
superpower, I guess it’d be the ability to change people’s minds. To have everything go in my favor, no matter what the circumstance is.”

              Everyone just kind of nods at me like the weird person I am. I shrug my shoulders, as in saying,
it’s true.
“With the right argument, you could have everything go in your favor,” the blonde guy says.

              “No, that is so far from the truth its frustrating. I’ve pleaded, cried, been manipulative, tried reverse psychology, but nope, nothing. He just doesn’t love me.”

              It goes silent around me and I realize I just admitted to much more than I meant to out loud. I guess this is what happens when you drink too much. Oops. “Uh, okay, so next question,” the dark haired guy says.

              “No,” Bray says. “Come on, Lexi. You have an hour before the wedding. Lets stop it.”

              “What wedding?” One of the guys asks, but my focus is not on them. It’s on Bray.

              “I’m drunk, Bray. This would be… horrible. What would Justin think?”

              “Who is Justin? Is he the one getting married?” the same guy says.

              I turn and look at them, all of sudden annoyed by their presence. “No, Justin is my son. His dad is Zander, he is about to marry a whore. And I love him.”

              Both of them look pretty shocked, but the blonde one that hasn’t had anything to drink stands up. “Let’s go break up a wedding then!”

              It’s beautiful, even in my drunken state I could tell you that. Kind of a dream wedding actually. It’s right at Jones’ Plantation, off to the right where its mostly a giant field. Using three small, white tents and one large one, the perfect canopy has been made. There are dazzling white lights strung throughout the tents, and all the chairs are a lilac color.

              The largest table displays their four tier wedding cake, all white with a lilac-purple drizzle. Surrounding tables have crystal vases filled with gorgeous bouquets, with what seems to be the plate ware they’ll be using for the reception, which is going to be right here after the wedding.

              Pure jealously flushes through my body but so doesn’t panic, and right now, I’m not so sure I can actually do this. Guests are already showing up as the wedding planning service is adding finalized touches. Zander must have paid a fair share of money for this wedding, and I know he loves Emerson, but I love him more. And I know, deep down, that he still has feelings for me. He’s kissed me, he told me he couldn’t even look at Emerson when I showed up in town, and she is a lying, cheating bitch. Yeah, I said it. A bitch.

              So even though this may be very wrong to do, I have to do it. Its now or never, because in less than an hour, she’ll be walking down the aisle, saying ‘I do’ to the man of my dreams. To man I love. And me, well, I’ll forever be heart broken.

              “Where do you think he is?” I ask Bray. “I don’t want to run into Emerson or her bridesmaids. They’ll know why I’m here.”

              She looks around, chewing on her lip. I can barely focus right now, with all the alcohol I had, but thankfully adrenaline sort of took over and flushed out some of the intoxicated feeling. Bray, however, seems pretty normal. Buzzing a bit, but most certainly not drunk. I’m a little jealous of her alcohol tolerance.

              She steps away from me and up to a girl with a white button-down blouse and dark tie. Obviously someone helping cater to the wedding. “Excuse me, miss? Do you happen to know where the groom is? I’m his sister, and he forgot the rings at home.”

              The girl looks horrified. “Oh, wow, um. Yeah. From what I know he is in the house. I believe my boss said something about the downstairs guest room, but I’m not completely sure. I can double check if you want.”

              “No, that is fine. Do you happen to know where the bride is? I just don’t want to run into her, because she’d probably question why I was finding my brother, and she’d be heartbroken to know he left the rings behind.”

              She smiles and nods her head. “Oh yes, Ms. Reardon is in the upstairs master suite. You should have no worries.” She winks at Bray and continues with her flower arrangement.

              Bray turns to me. “Okay, Lexi Lou, let’s go find my brother. That way I can slap him upside the head for forgetting these rings.” She smiles as she slips her arm around my elbow, pulling me along.

              As we get to the house, panic strikes me hard, and all of a sudden I’m not so sure I can actually break up someone’s wedding. “Bray, I can’t do this. I can’t.”

“Liquid courage,” she states. “You can. And if it doesn’t work, or if you’re embarrassed, just blame it on the alcohol.”

I grunt as Bray starts signing,
“Blame it goose, got you feeling loose, blame it on Patron, got you in the zone, blame it on the a-a-a-a-alcohol, blame it on the a-a-a-a-alcohol.”

We reach the downstairs guest room, and the only reason I know where it is, is because I used to come here in the summer with Zander. He worked here about ten hours a week, making some extra cash. It really should be no surprise that he’d take this place over one day. We had tons of fun in this guest room too. Nothing major, just making out, sometimes exploring first base. Tingles between my legs take over as thoughts come rushing through.

I can’t think about this. I can’t think about this. Dammit, I can’t think about this.

With a sigh, I bring my fist up to the door and knock. I can hear talking on the other side and I realize that he isn’t alone in there. When the door opens, it’s actually Zander’s dad taking up the frame. He looks surprised to see me. “Ms. Bennett, about time you showed up.” He winks and opens the door wider. I spot Zander and Justin in the room, both in everything but their jackets.

“Mr. Fields,” I say with a smile.
What does he mean, about time I showed up? Did he expect me to?

“It’s been nice getting to know my grandson,” he states.

My face heats up. “Oh.”

With a chuckle, he turns his head around. “Justin, come on, your parent’s need to talk for a few minutes.”

Justin looks over and notices me for the first time. He smiles and looks up at Zander, who is looking at me like I’ve betrayed him. This all is such a mess, but I’m here, and I’m going to
try
.