From the Ashes (3 page)

“Oh.” Emotions played across Jesse’s face. First he narrowed his eyes, but then he shrugged. “Well, I suppose I wasn’t
out
either until a couple months ago. So I don’t have room to judge.”

Jesse took up walking again, leaving Tomas alone with his thoughts. Tomas didn’t understand why guys in the city made such a big deal out of being
out
. Yeah, Tomas didn’t tell his family and friends everything he did with his dick. But who did?

Anyway, according to Tomas’s older brother, you weren’t gay so long as you never sucked cock or took it up the ass.

His brother had slapped him hard the one time Tomas had tried to talk to him about his same-sex attraction. Hands fisted, Diego had told him he’d stay straight so long as he was always the one doing the other guy. Then he’d slapped Tomas again for good measure.

“You really don’t mind me staying over? Even if we don’t hook up?” Jesse peeked at Tomas over his shoulder. His pale skin was fading to gray, and he looked dead on his feet.

“I get it, man.” The grocery bags dug into his hands, but Tomas didn’t mind. It was only another half mile back to the fire station where he’d parked his truck. “We can order pizza. Have some beer.” He smiled but turned his head to hide it. “I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

“You think Chardonnay would jump out?” Jesse compared the dog—slobber running down her jaw—to the interior of Tomas’s truck. The Dodge gleamed in the dark night, brand new, white with gray upholstery, and no backseat.

Panting at the two of them, Char wagged her tail. She’d shaken off most of the ashes during their walk, but she was still pretty dusty.

“It’s illegal to drive with a dog in a truck bed.” Tomas opened the passenger-side door. “You’ll have to hold her on your lap.” He gave Jesse a broad smile, teeth flashing wickedly sexy against his burgundy lips.

Chardonnay paced in front of the truck’s open door.

“Maybe I can push the seat back and she can fit on the ground?” Jesse hovered right along with Chardonnay, having no idea how the two of them would fit.

“Maybe.” Tomas got in the driver’s side. He leaned across the cab, hand outstretched, beckoning Jesse inside.

Damn
, he was handsome. He’d changed his clothes at the firehouse and was wearing a clean black T-shirt, jeans and a gold chain around his neck. With the possible exception of the necklace, nothing about his outward appearance projected him being gay. But now that Jesse knew, he saw the signs everywhere. Tomas’s gaze lingered a little too long, and he was too quick to wink.

Jesse climbed into the seat. Chardonnay, perhaps sensing she could be left behind, scrabbled after him. She scraped his legs and stomped on his balls as she tried to sit on the uneven surface of his lap.

“Ow. Oh, c’mon.” Jesse pushed her feet into a better position. He reached under the seat for the lever, burying his face in Chardonnay’s smelly coat in the process. God, the dog needed a bath. She was a solid wall of skin, hair, ash and muscle.

“Here. Let me help you.” Tomas rested his torso on Jesse’s thigh and felt around between Jesse’s legs for the handle.

Woah.
Lust shot through him like a swallow of hard liquor, tearing through the fucked-up-ness of his day. How awesome would it be to forget everything and spend the evening getting to know every inch of the hot firefighter’s body?

Tomas must have been having trouble with the mechanism because he stayed down there with his face deliciously close to Jesse’s groin for long enough to make Jesse forget about his house and his life and his lack of clean underwear. Surreptitiously, Jesse thrust his hips.

“There we go.” Tomas yanked on something, and Jesse’s seat jerked backwards. The move scared an already nervous Chardonnay, and she twisted in Jesse’s lap, scratching the crap out of the equipment he’d need in working order for any nighttime escapades with his savior.

“Thanks.” Jesse winced at another scratch of Chardonnay’s claws. Sid and Ladonna had probably never had her nails clipped.

“Here. She can put her head outside.” Tomas lowered the passenger-side window and started the truck. He took up the armrest between them.

Char licked every bit of Jesse’s skin she could get at. “Ew. Stop.” Jesse urged her away, remembering a similar experience from high school when Brenda had gotten drunk and tried to make out with him at a party.

“She likes you, huh?” Tomas chuckled again. Deep and calm, the sound of his laugh reached all the way to Jesse’s toes. It might have made his dick twitch if there hadn’t been a hundred pounds of stinky, slobbery dog kicking him repeatedly in the nuts.

“I think she’s just happy to be with somebody.” She’d always seemed so lonely out in the yard. Maybe that’s why Jesse had bonded with her. He’d been lonely in his parents’ house in Pullman, and though he felt better understood in Seattle, he was still lonely here.

“She’s not trying to kiss me.” Tomas gave him another one of those unnervingly sexy smiles.

Chardonnay must have thought Tomas was aiming his charm at her because she tried to lick Tomas’s face.

“Come on, sweetie.” Jesse pushed her neck. “Look out the window, and we’ll be there soon.”

Jesse had only been to the South End once, to go to IKEA—where he’d spent a good chunk of the money he’d saved on plywood furniture that was now cinder.

“It’s about twenty minutes.” Tomas turned onto the highway.

Jesse rubbed his eyes.

“You okay?” Tomas asked.

“I don’t know.” Jesse watched the city pass by, the Space Needle a stark and glowing disk. They drove so far south he had to crane his head to see the buildings.

“You will be.” Tomas scrubbed at Chardonnay’s fur. Maybe because he wanted to touch Jesse but was keeping his promise of not getting physical.

It didn’t matter. Either way, it made Jesse feel better.

“Yeah, eventually.” Jesse had been out on his ass before, and he could do it again. He just wished he’d had a little warning this time. He closed his eyes and leaned back in the seat. Chardonnay must have taken her lead from him because she rested her face on his neck. Her breath was atrocious. “But right now, my life sucks pretty fucking hard.”

Chapter Three

Tomas cut the engine. “So, I live in that house.” He pointed to the small building that had originally been a two-car garage. Tomas didn’t check Jesse’s expression, not wanting to know if Jesse turned up his nose.

“Okay.” Jesse got out of the car.

The dogs were barking in the backyard, making such a racket his mother must have heard. Tomas’s only hope for avoiding her was if she’d gone out for groceries.

“You must be beat. Let’s order some Pizza Hut. You like pepperoni?” Tomas grabbed the bags and headed for his door.

“Sure.” Jesse peered down the block. Long, flat row houses lined the street, mostly well kept but nothing fancy. Nervously, Tomas watched Jesse’s face for his reaction. Tomas had never brought a guy home before, never even brought around any of the girls he tried to date.

“
¿Tomas?
” His mother’s voice rang out behind him, and Tomas groaned in frustration. “
¿Estas en casa, Tomas?
”

“
Si, Mami. Soy yo.
” Tomas jogged up the steps to where his mom was standing at her front door. “
Bendición.
” He pressed a kiss onto her cheek and squeezed her hand.

She gave him a suspicious look, but a split second later switched her attention to the filthy, drooling dog dragging on the end of Jesse’s leash.

Tomas and his mother spoke in rapid-fire Spanish. His mother wore a flower-print dress with a woven vest over it. As she pointed at Chardonnay, Jesse might not have understood what she was saying, but he’d learned enough Spanish in high school to know that
perro
meant
dog
,
casa
meant
house
and
no
meant…the obvious.

Tomas and his mother raised their voices until they were having what in Jesse’s family would have been a heated argument, but in the end Tomas said something angry, combined with a flick of his hand that might have looked very gay if he weren’t Latino, and stormed off the front porch.

Grudgingly, Tomas’s mother folded her arms across her ample bosom.

Jesse waved, uncertain whether he should introduce himself. He didn’t know if she spoke any English, and though he’d been taught how to introduce himself in Spanish by high school teachers and Dora the Explorer alike, he felt slightly embarrassed to do so out loud.

Tomas gestured. “Jesse, this is my mother, Rosa Perez.
Mami
, this is Jesse. He’s a friend from Seattle.”

“Hi.” Jesse cleared his throat. “
Buenas noches.
” That was right, right? Or maybe he was supposed to say
buenas tardes
. Maybe
buenas noches
meant
good night
, as if they were going to sleep or something.

Tomas’s mother smiled, but it looked a little forced. Jesse didn’t know if she was upset about his clothes or his hair, but he was pretty sure it was about the dog.

“You must keep the dog in the yard,” Mrs. Perez told him in accented English. “It’s very secure.”

“Thank you,” he said, because he didn’t have any choice. Jesse would have liked to keep Chardonnay nearby, but she’d never lived inside. She might spend the night scraping at the door or marking the rooms.

With a final withering glare, Tomas’s mother retreated into her house, leaving the two of them alone in the driveway.

“Sorry about that.” Tomas picked up Jesse’s groceries and headed toward the cottage to unlock the door. “We can lead her through to get to the yard. Do you want to give her a bath today or wait until tomorrow?”

Jesse sighed. “We should probably wait.” Suds and water would go flying everywhere—and that would be in the best-case scenario where she actually cooperated. Not a great idea, especially if Tomas’s mother was watching out her window.

Tomas’s place was small—only a living room with a kitchenette and a door that must have led to a bedroom. At the far end, a clear door faced the backyard.

Jesse tried to kick off his shoes before he tracked in dirt, but Chardonnay dragged him across the cottage. He caught her collar before she could jump up and scratch the glass.

Tomas came up behind him, one hand going to Jesse’s shoulder and the other reaching for the handle. Just like in the truck, heat sparked in Jesse’s belly.

Tomas’s breath fanned Jesse’s neck, his body a solid weight at Jesse’s back. Jesse only had a split second to enjoy it before Tomas pushed open the door.

“Here ya go.” Stepping back, Tomas gave Jesse space. “We’ve got two other dogs, but they’re smaller.” He took the leash from Jesse’s hand, humming and oblivious to Jesse’s attention.

The roll in Tomas’s walk should have been illegal. As Jesse followed, he took in Tomas’s boxy, broad frame and the way his ass filled out his jeans.

“Hey there, Chester. Sushi.” Tomas patted the heads of two midsized mutts. The older one—Chester—was some kind of cocker spaniel mix. Sushi was wirier, maybe a Jack Russell terrier mixed with something light. Neither dog could have topped forty pounds, but both barked like crazy, trying to get Chardonnay’s attention.

Jesse worried about the Jack Russell mix. Those dogs could be brats, and even aggressive. It might not understand Chardonnay could eat it alive.

Whimpering, Char tugged on the leash. She backed up and barked to shoo the other dogs away. But then Sushi went around to sniff her ass, and Char took the opportunity to return the favor. Suddenly, something was decided between them, and they were sniffing all over each other, play fighting.

It wasn’t much different than the couple clubs Jesse had been to, except that men tended to wait until they were in private to lick one another’s butts.

Only Chester hung back, batting with his paws. He seemed to want to get in a couple sniffs but was thwarted by the more aggressive Sushi. With his gray muzzle, he had the air of an old dog, one not up to wrestling with a hundred-pound mastiff.

“I think I can let her go.” Tomas struggled to get the collar off Chardonnay’s neck and set her free.

Fur flew everywhere as the two dogs wrestled and grabbed and yelped and growled, with Chester barking his loudest in the background. Jesse stepped forward to stop them from hurting one another, but Tomas pushed him out of the way.

“They’ll figure it out,” he said, close to Jesse’s ear. The way he crowded him toward the door was exactly what Jesse liked. Jesse didn’t have much experience—just that month and a half with Bobby, and a few hookups since he’d moved to Seattle—but a guy advancing on him, pushing him into a wall or onto a bed… Man, the rough-and-ready types really turned his knob.

“Um, yeah.” He’d forgotten what he and Tomas were discussing.

A loud yelp sounded from the yard. “Aren’t you worried one of them’ll get hurt?”

Tomas gave Jesse a smile so hot it could have melted paint off the walls. “Nah. Sushi and Chester were strays. They’ve toughed it out before.” He waved to where Sushi was trying to mount and hump on Chardonnay. “See?”

“Um, he’s fixed, right?” The last thing Jesse needed was to be homeless with a giant pregnant dog.

“Sushi’s a she. So we’ve got nothing to worry about.” Tomas gave him another one of those sexy winks.