Fur Magic Boxed Set: Talisman, Sage, Fawn, Lola: Paranormal Romantic Comedy (18 page)

Chapter 13

Please tell me you’re joking. We’re seconds from freeing Penelope once and for all.

Dr. Luke was Pen’s true love, there wasn’t a doubt in my mind or Dr. Luke’s for that matter. Penelope was the only one who didn’t see it, and I’d had to avoid changing to human form because of that.

Penelope and Dr. Luke were inches from each other. He had one hand on her shoulder, bringing his lips in for a chaste first kiss. Penelope’s eyes were closed, revealing the perfect lines of her liquid eyeliner.

It’s Stout and he’s coming in hotter than butter on a stack of mouse pancakes.

That’s disgusting.

So is Elias Stout. What’s the definition of a lawyer?

I give.

A mouth with a life support system attached to it.

Funny, Owl Bundy.

Sage sounded harried, even in my thoughts and I didn’t blame him. We’d worked hard trying to keep Penelope safe and all we’d gotten so far was trouble, trouble and more trouble. Whether it was in the shape of nosy Elias Stout or demonic Damien Chokecherry.

Can you stall him?

It’s too late Catmosabe, he’s on the stairs and through the door already.

True to form, the door to the living room slammed open, banging against the wall and bouncing back to collide with Stout’s face. 

Everyone shrieked, and Dr. Luke and Penelope sprang apart without achieving true love’s kiss. If I’d had a voice box I would’ve screamed my rage and if I’d had toddler arms, I would’ve thrown one hell of a shit fit on the living room floor raving about my Cheerios and my juice box.

This was ridiculous. Getting Pen to kiss the vet had become my life’s mission, which was definitely not what I’d signed up for when I’d been adrift in the pre-birth cat ether.

Elias Stout stood framed in the doorway, pale and sweaty, with his collar open to expose the short slab of meat which led down past the buttons and to his navel. He was hairless as a baby.

Not all babies are born without hair.

Sure, you can’t stop Elias Stout on the doorway, but random natal trivia is your thing. What would we do without you, Sage?

That’d better be a serious question. You would’ve been dead nine times over without me. Game finally over.

“Elias?” Ami asked, rising slowly. Eldris joined her. They were practically attached at the hip and Ami definitely didn’t seem to mind. She’d always been more savvy than Penelope when it came to the dating game. She had her fingers twined in Eldris’ as she gazed up at him with adoration.

Stout snapped his head around and stared at her, then his gaze travelled down her arm and to that link with Eldris. His eyes darkened with bubbling psychotic rage.

Oh boy, this doesn’t look good.

I scrunched up beside Lola to watch the outburst, and she buried her face in my fur to avoid the sight of it. Smart kitty, she realized danger when she saw it and Elias was Danger with a capital D. I’d never realized how much until I’d entered his abode and saw rats riding dirt bikes.

“You,” Elias said, pointing a finger at Penelope, his raspy voice squishing out of his mouth in a croak. “You wretched, evil little witch.”

“Hey!” Dr. Luke rose immediately. “Don’t you dare talk to Penelope like that. This is her home and she’s entertaining guests.”

Pen stood up, knocking the bottle with her feet as she did so, a sore reminder of the failed game and kiss. “What do you want, Elias? You weren’t invited.” Pen’s shoulders were back and straight, as if someone had inserted a broomstick between them. This was her at her fieriest. I liked it when she got in one of these moods. Dr. Luke would too and then he’d become addicted to feisty Pen.

“You broke into my house and stole my phone! I know you did it. I want that phone back.” Elias laid out a palm to accept the imaginary device. Little did he know it was at the bottom of his mucky fish tank. Maybe if he cleaned once in a while he’d know that.

Kara and Chase stood together in the corner, canoodling and joking, but they frowned and looked over at Elias the minute he chucked the accusation at Pen.

“What’s this about a phone?” Chase asked, slipping his arm around Kara’s shoulders and guiding her forward. “I’m sorry but you’re not invited to this party. Uh, it’s kind of a couple’s thing.”

Elias’ psychobabble ceased for a moment and he glared at Chase and Kara, assessing their fresh connection. Yeah, this wouldn’t end well. Elias had witnessed the first of their fireworks-inducing fights and Pen’s slip-up spell.

“How? Wha…?” Stout turned to Penelope again, shaking from head-to-toe, a quivering leaf on a willow tree. “I want my phone back. I suggest you give it to me if you know what’s good for you.”

“Is that a threat?” Dr. Luke asked, taking a step forward, putting more distance between Elias and Penelope. She stared at the good doctor’s back and the corners of her lips twitched upwards in the beginnings of a smile, which was quickly suppressed by Elias’ hissing.

“Yes, that’s a threat. I’ll take you to court. And I knew a really good lawyer. I’ll bury you in legal fees.”

What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
Sage poised himself to soar on to Stout’s head again.

Frequent flyer miles.

Bada Bing. I still had my kitty savoir faire. Did you hear that, doll?

Lola licked my inner ear.
I did, hot stuff. A sense of humor is so sexy
.

“I don’t have your phone. Why would I steal your phone when I have a perfectly good one of my own?” Pen took her cell out and held it up to the light so everyone could see.

“Because you wanted the evidence.”

“What evidence?” Dr. Luke asked, reaching back to grasp Penelope’s hand and pull her up behind him. The set of his jaw was the same as the night he’d found Chokecherry in Penelope’s garden. “You’d better start talking before I call the cops.”

“Call the cops, ha! I’m the one who should call the cops. She stole my phone so that no one would see the truth about her being a witch, about her casting a spell to…”

“That’s enough,” Ami said, “you’re not making any sense. I think you should leave, Elias.”

Stout refused to look at his onetime crush, Ami, and continued staring directly ahead. “Oh, I’ll leave once I get my phone. I know what’s going on. I saw the woman in the clearing in red, it could only have been you, witch girl.”

I froze and stared at Elias, but then, so did everyone else. The woman in red? In the clearing? That sounded exactly like what Fawn had described. Ami broke away from Eldris a second later with a quick apology.

She rushed out of the door without another word.

Sage, keep an eye on Ami, she’s coming out in a second. I want to know which way she goes.

On it.

I prodded Lola with the edge of my nose and she straightened and blinked her baby blues at me.
Feel like going on an adventure?

I go where you go, Tali.

That’s my girl.

Eldris stared after Ami in utter confusion and even Elias paused his terrorizing rant to gape at her sudden departure.

“Ami?”

“Don’t worry about me,” she called from the front door, “I just have to check something out. Oh, and Pen? I think the fajitas are burning.”

“No!” Penelope yelled, and rushed past Elias to save her precious Mexican food.

Eldris stepped up to Elias and glared at him. “You have no right coming in here, Stout, no right at all. And you’re so old the key on Benjamin Franklin’s kite was to your house.”

A good zinger but totally nerdsville. Just like my young friend, Eldris. He’d probably been harboring that one for years waiting to bring it to life like his sixth grade science experiment.

“I go where my investigation takes me.” Stout folded his arms, but he’d start wilting already, his resolve had shriveled to a pea and he backed toward the exit, fingers fumbling over the surface of a smooth, antique desk in the corner. It’d been there since the times of Papa Delacroix.

“Investigation? You don’t have an investigation. You’re a bully, it’s as simple as that, and you’d better damn well leave Penelope and Amelia alone.” Eldris rammed his fists onto his hips, and Dr. Luke joined him in the pose.

These guys would protect Penelope come El Chupacabra or dying gardens.

Which way, Sage?

She’s heading for the woods. I think I’ll follow.

I glanced at Lola.
Wait for us, we’re coming with you
.

Chapter 14

Took you long enough.

Sage  flew over us and down the garden path. I sprinted after him, Lola bounding along at my side, white fur fluffing in the wind created by our passing.

Which way?

My muscles were taut and I already had a stitch from the exercise. Too many hours licking my nether region and not enough time exploring the wilderness. What could I say? I was a creature of habit. And my habits happened to start with an ‘L’ and end with an ‘uxuries’.

She’s heading for Fawn’s shoulder, as far as I can tell.

It’s the clearing, she’s going for the clearing. Claws crossed Chokecherry isn’t there to intercept her.

I’m scared, Tali
. Lola panted, jostling alongside me.
What if Ami gets hurt?

Not on my watch, darling
. Sage interrupted with a flap of his wings.

I hissed into the night to warn him off. But I didn’t answer Lola anyway. What if Ami did get hurt? She was the journalist; she liked to investigate and figure things out, but this was crazy.

Chokecherry was dangerous and Ami had to know that whoever was messing with Penelope was way too powerful for a mere mortal to deal with. We had to get to her before she got to that clearing.

I picked up the pace, forcing myself to run in spite of the pain in my side, paws pattering along the sidewalk, then the road and finally into the grass near Fawn’s spot. She was nowhere in sight, which wasn’t necessarily a good sign.  I didn’t reach out to her; we didn’t need to involve anyone else in this goose chase.

She’s gone into the woods.

Sage fluttered into the trees and perched there, waiting for us to catch up.

We’d better stay low if we want to survive this. I thought I heard someone else moving in the woods.

My hair stood on end, and I didn’t have to look at Lola to know hers was sticking up straight punk-rocker style. Normally, I’d enjoy the change in style, but not tonight. This was deathly serious.

What do we do?
Lola nudged me.

We go in there and try to save Amelia before it’s too late.

I padded forward at a slower pace, slinking rather than hurtling, brushing past spiky brittlebushes and the rough bark of trees. The night was clear and windless and there was a new moon. Too dark to see much in front of us if it weren’t for the night vision.

Voices travelled through the woods on air that was suddenly stagnant and tasted foul. I puckered my kitty lips and hacked a cough.

Quiet. They’re up ahead.
Sage flitted from tree to tree above us, a shadow in the night, using the silent tactics of an owl hunting in the field. I’d have to cut back on those field mice jokes now that I’d seen what he was capable of.

“What do you think you’re doing?” That was Amelia, self-righteous and filled with passion.

I hurried forward with Lola hot on my heels, then hid behind a tree to study the situation. It didn’t look good.

The cloaked woman, all in red velvet, was on the floor in the center of the clearing with a bubbling cauldron over an open green flame. She twinkled her fingers over the concoction, ignoring Ami’s presence.

Maybe we could still get her out in time, then. All wasn’t lost yet.

“You answer me, Chokecherry,” Ami snapped.

Finally, the woman stopped her magical maneuvering and rose from the grass, her soft velvets whispering.

“Yes, that’s right. I know it’s one of you. I’ve been keeping tabs on this situation since the beginning, and I won’t let you continue torturing Penelope for no reason. You leave her the hell alone.” Amelia stuck her index finger out and waggled it at the cloaked figure.

Ami hadn’t witnessed El Chupacabra. She didn’t realize just how dangerous the witch in front of her was, and Pen’s waning magical powers and resistance to do anything truly terrible – always a good thing – had led her to believe that she wasn’t in any sort of trouble.

How wrong she was.

We should attack.
I made to move forward, but Sage fluttered down and blocked my path, eyes wide. He turned his head and pointed one wing at a spot behind Amelia in the forest.

It’s too late for that now. Look.

I looked. Damien Chokecherry stood a short way behind Ami, hidden by the night, but visible as the pale glimmer of green against the trunks of the trees. The light flickered, casting an eerie glow on his grin.

We have to help her! Come on, let’s do this.

No. It’s too dangerous. We’ll all get killed and how could Pen survive losing all of us?

Sage got in front of me again.

I considered taking a swipe at him, but the look in his eyes stayed my hand.

Think, tuna for brains, if we go out there now, they’ll kill us and capture her. We’ll live to fight another day.

I don’t like this.
That was from Lola, who rubbed against me, desperate for any kind of comfort.

My eyes were fixated on Ami, who had her hands on her hips and looked down her nose at the witch. “I’m not afraid of you. Now, I suggest you take your hood off and show me your identity. If you promise to stop messing with Penelope, then maybe I’ll consider not reporting you to the police.”

The witch giggled hysterically, a high-pitched squeal of delight in response to Ami’s threat. “The police?” She rasped, giggling harder still. “You think the police can stop me?” The witch raised a gloved hand, red velvet of course, and clicked her fingers.

Damien Chokecherry rushed out from under the trees and grasped Ami around the waist. He covered her mouth with a cotton cloth; she kicked back, fighting against his grip, but Damien wasn’t a small guy and Ami was a decidedly small girl.

Slowly but surely, her kicks and elbows waned and her movements stalled. Her head dropped forward and she passed out from whatever concoction Chokecherry had soaked the rag in.

“Good, at least that’s out of the way,” the witch said.

“What do we do with this one? They’ll send out a search party for her once they realize she’s gone.” Damien dumped Amelia over his shoulder like a sack of Mr. Oats’ manure.

“It’s too late for that now. Besides, the ritual will be completed within the next few days. By that time, Penelope Delacroix will be dead and I will have enough power to overthrow anyone who stands in my path.” The witch paused and sniffed the air. “Better hurry up about it. I believe we have an audience.” She turned her head and looked in our direction.

This time, my insides nearly jumped clean out of my body. I could feel her gaze sweeping the underbrush and the minute it landed on us, we’d be toast. Burned toast, Penelope’s infamous breakfast flop.

Run!
I sent to both Lola and Sage. We scrammed out of there, darting between the trees on both the ground and in the sky with the witch’s cackling laughter in our ears. This was a nightmare.

Ami was gone and Shadowkeep would be in an uproar. Penelope would take this hard and stop at nothing to find her friend, which the Chokecherry’s probably expected. All of that added up to a shit storm in a litterbox, and we were in the vortex.

What do we do?

I asked Sage, as we ran, despairing for the first time in weeks.

I think I might have a plan.
Sage was already at the lamppost, waiting when we burst from the forest.

Spill it, Big Bird.

I was in a bad mood. Things were about to get mighty uncomfortable for all of us and I needed to blame someone.

Remember Dagda Cerridwyn?

Uh huh?

I flicked my tail, glancing back in case that beast Damien decided to materialize and terrorize us too.

I found her.