Geli Voyante's Hot or Not (13 page)

There’s the sweetener – my lollipop.

‘Please, show that. Don’t stoop to her level. Chin up, girl. You’re getting a free holiday out of this,’ he says as the cherry on top.

I wearily
nod. He leaves my pod as Theo, Jerry and Susie come walking across. The staff meeting must be over.

‘What did I miss?’ I ask, more for Susie’s benefit than my own
.

‘Not much,’ Jerry answers.

Theo smiles at me.

‘You were in a meeting with Colin?’ Susie asks me quite nicely. Normally she goes mad at me when I
sneak in late to a staff meeting, and then she shouts at me back in my pod. A lot.

I nod.

‘OK.’ She smiles at me like we are
friends
. ‘If you need to work on your column from home today, just let me know, love.’ With that surprising sentence, she walks off.

‘Someone’s getting special f
avours today.’ Jerry winks.

I wonder if he knows about my two weeks of free jollies? He’s right though – I certainly am the favoured, instead of the foul one
, today. Amazingly. How fast does news and gossip spread in this building? It must seep through the floors and ceiling like super-duper fast osmosis.

‘Well go and m
ake Geli a cup of tea then, Ben.’ Theo shoots him a boy-look.

Jerry obediently scuttles off
, leaving me with Theo. How could I have doubted him this morning? He crouches down so he’s my height; standing is not an option in my current state. My hip’s bruise begins to throb like it knows its creator’s presence.

‘Hello, beautiful.’ H
e leans in and kisses me. 

‘Hi,’ I mutter back.

I could get used to this, but I am still shell-shocked at my free holiday time and the Theo offer. What on earth is Tiggy playing at? Theo kissing me is also rendering my senses silly. A public display of affection at work? I’m not going to be able to control myself if this becomes the norm. Mmm, sex in a pod. Kinky.

‘How are you?’
he asks.

‘I hurt.’

‘From last night?’ I nod.

‘Babe,’ he says. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘That’s why I was so late. I can barely move,’ I pout.

He kisses me again in response.
‘No meeting with Colin then?’ he queries.

‘It was only ten minutes long,’ I say sheepishly. ‘He caught me sn
eaking in late. Dad has told him to make me go to the bloody wedding, so they’re giving me the two-week honeymoon holiday.’

‘Jesus.
’ Theo whistles at this and he’s no stranger to
New News’
perks for
favoured
staff since he’s a frequent receiver of them.

‘Will you come with me?’

‘Huh?’

‘I mean, you don’t have to
and I know it’s weird me asking you so soon,’ I rush out. ‘But Colin said they’ll let you have an extra week of holiday... if you do.’

Theo doesn’t say anything.

I meekly continue, feeling incredibly
silly. ‘I have no idea how they know about last night,’ I say. ‘But for some reason Colin has the impression that you might be escorting me to Tiggy’s wedding.’

‘
Tiggy’s wedding?
’

He has this look in his eyes.
Panic? Disgust? Or both? Disgust that he has to endure Tiggy after I’ve told him all about her vileness; panic because he’ll probably get asked when he’s going to pop the question to me if he agrees to accompany me. Or maybe just panic because he’s realising that I am Trouble and not worth it.

‘It’s a stupid
idea,’ I say. ‘Oh, look! Here’s Jerry with the tea. Thanks Jerry!’

Could I sound any more false and desperate?

‘Cheers mate.’

Theo
stands up and takes his cup from Jerry, causing Jerry to shoot me a look. All I can do is make a panic-stricken face as he returns to his pod. His lack of response suggests he won’t be taking me to Tiggy’s wedding; he probably won’t be taking me anywhere now. If I think who is to blame for this, one person immediately springs to mind: Tiggy Boodles. It’s like she knows
exactly
how to ruin my life and has no qualms whatsoever about ruining it. Bitch.

‘Have you asked Theo to accompany you to my wedding?’ Tiggy pounces on me the second I enter the room.

I’m heading home after this “meeting” to write my column there because the atmosphere circulating over the pods i
s like a cyclone. I’ve not managed to snag either Jerry or Sara alone and I fear the weirdness is already there with Theo. I have the awful feeling I’ll be up in front of the disciplinary panel, choosing where I want to move to, by the end of the week.

‘What has Theo got to do with this?’ I snarl at her.

And really? What has it? I went on one date with him which, yes, is one more date than Tiggy Boodles has ever been on with him, but it’s not as if you are betrothed to marry people who you have merely had dinner – coughs – with.

‘I’m just
so
excited for you, Geli,’ she says, pouring me a glass of water.

This is all very strange. Why has she suddenly taken to calling me Geli? What does she care about my happiness? I seriously doubt this proposal has suddenly converted her into Mother Theresa overnight.

‘We had one date,’ I state. ‘That’s all.’

I
stiffly walk over to the window, even though it hurts, because I love the view from our office building. This one, the Bellows Room, is Sara’s side of the Gherkin and it looks out over the Tower of London and Tower Bridge. The sky today looks almost grey-pink and I’m sure I can detect tiny snowflakes swirling around. It was trying to snow this morning as I hobbled into a cab to take me to work because I couldn’t face the Tube in my weakened state. It still makes me catch my breath when I think how much history has happened here in London. I love this city. 

‘So
, you’re not serious?’

‘Tiggy, I know you’ve being engaged all of one day, but surely you recall the dating scene and its stupid rules?’
I snap, turning back around to glare at her.

Despite necking a few more
Nurofen than is recommended, I can’t escape the dull throb in my hip. It’s like a particularly persistent toothache that won’t go away. Now with Tiggy, my head is pounding.

She nods
, satisfied with I don’t know what from my answer. To think, we used to be inseparable. I have no idea how I coped. Calvin deserves a medal for agreeing to marry her. Though, I suppose he gets some benefit from it, like the teensy outfit she is wearing. She certainly knows how to work her figure, though a tribal playsuit in London in December, sans tights, wouldn’t make my top ten winter outfit choices.

My outfit today screams ensemble-challenged in comparison. Given the limited movement of my limbs, it took me the best part of twenty minutes to wriggle into my burgundy Alice + Olivia jeans
, and then another ten to slip on enough buttoned up layers to keep me warm. My hair is in a messy bun – I got Jerry to tie it back for me – but I had to arrive in work with a sex-produced bird’s nest.
Classy.

Oh.
She’s jabbering on again.

‘Well, if you become serious, he’s more than welcome to
attend.’ She smiles like we’re best buds and not the bitter enemies we actually are.

‘Why?’ I ask her suspiciously. ‘What’s in it for you if he does?’

‘Geli,’ she trills at me, all false smiles. ‘I want to see you happy. Isn’t it about time we put aside our silly childish differences and be the grown-ups we actually are?’ she coos.

‘I suppose so.’

Inside, I disagree though. I
know
Tiggy Boodles. I know she’s scheming something, and I know I’m going to play along with her pretences of niceness until she slips up and reveals her evil intentions.

‘Fabulous!’ S
he takes a sip of her water. Choke please.

‘T
ell me about Calvin,’ I ask, curiosity getting the better of me. ‘How did you two meet? How did he propose? When’s the wedding and so on?’

She beams once again
. She looks worryingly happy for my liking; it’s most unusual for me not to be able to detect a hidden glint behind her false smiles. Then, I realise, this
is
a genuine Tiggy Boodles smile. Crikey.

‘We met at the Roses
’ Thanksgiving dinner last month,’ she begins.

I cut her off immediately regarding that opener. ‘
What?
You’ve know him
three
weeks
?’

The Roses are American friends of Tiggy’s. She works with Savannah Rose at
Glitz
; Savannah’s husband Jackson is chief photographer at
New News’
more up-market high society magazine, the ironically named,
Rags
. Not many people realise that’s short for “Rich and Gorgeous”. Naturally, Jackson comes into contact with London’s most rich and gorgeous men and Tiggy works her way through them.

‘It was love at first sight.’ S
he smiles. ‘He’s amazing, Geli. You’re going to love him. He’s just your type.’

Is that a dig? I know it’s true though
. Tiggy and I do have alarmingly similar taste in men and I’ve already experienced the lust-pull from the sight of Calvin in photos.

Agreeably, he might be Tiggy’s type looks-wise, but personality? That doesn’t seem to correspond with his charity work and Tiggy’s distinct lack of niceness to anyone who can’t benefit her own wicked way. I do wonder at this point how she is going to benefit
from being nice to me now. I am agog that she is engaged after
three sodding weeks
. Where’s the justice in this world?

‘W
hen’s the wedding then?’

‘March
5th.’

‘
This
March 5th?’ I gasp.

‘The very same!
’ she tinkles. ‘We’re heading out to South Africa on February 22nd and you’ll be back in London on March 7th.’

‘It’s booked already
?’

‘Yes
! We didn’t see any point in waiting,’ she adds, triumphantly flashing her ring at me.

I am in shock. How can anyone decide they want to get married th
ree weeks after meeting someone, then arrange a wedding for three months later unless…

‘
You’re...
pregnant
?’ But how would they know
that
early?

Tiggy la
ughs. ‘That’s exactly what Daddy said!’

I can feel the Tiggy bile rising in my throat
at that remark. ‘He’s not your father, Tiggy,’ I say tightly.

‘Yes, Geli,’ s
he says seriously. ‘I know that. But, he’s the closest thing I have to one given how my daddy
tragically
died. You do remember that, don’t you?’

She continues before I can reply, ‘It’s going to be awful knowing he’s not there with me on my big day, but at least Uncle
Rupe can ease the pain.’

I’m about to roll my eyes, but I realise
it must be tough for Tiggy. I mean,
if
I get married I have the choice over whether I want my father to walk me down the aisle – not happening – but Tiggy’s choice was taken away from her. I suppose I can’t begrudge her that. I think it was her use of “Uncle Rupe” opposed to “Daddy” that has suddenly swung me into sympathy mode, although I’ve always suspected she only refers to him as Daddy in front of me to piss me off.

‘Fair enough,’ I concede not wanting to continue down the avenue of my father.
‘So, Claire and I are bridesmaids. Who else?’

‘Nope
, it’s just you two. It’s going to be a small
family
wedding.’

I ignore that goad. I really am doing exceptionally
well with Tiggy today, but I’m still high from Theo who accosted me before I headed down here, to remind me I am worth a million of Tiggy and that he would like to see me this evening. My request of his company at the wedding seems to have been forgotten luckily. Maybe there will be no Trouble… maybe.

‘And Calvin doesn’t mind the small wedding?’ I dutifully ask in my role as bridesmaid and the bride’s stepsister.

‘Nope. He’s left it all up to me.’

‘Right.’

I can’t think what else to say. This is the longest conversation we’ve had in years.

‘It’s being held
in Mooi River,’ she says breaking the silence.   

‘Ah,
OK.’

What can I say? To be honest, I’m still in shock
that she’s actually engaged so soon for non-pregnant reasons. I can painfully hear the clock ticking away – surely I’ve done my duty now and can leave? If Tiggy was my friend – say it was Glinda sat opposite me – I’m sure I would be firing out questions as fast as Glinda was answering them. But,
this is
Tiggy
.

‘Are you heading back to Durban for Christmas?’ I ask awkwardly.

‘Yes, I’ll be able to sort out most of the wedding then.’

‘Lucky!
’ Remembering the weather there and comparing it with the freezing weather we’re having in London at the moment, I am a little jealous. OK, a lottle jealous.

‘You can always spend Christmas with us,’ she
suggests. ‘We are your family, too.’

I strongly disagree with her on that one, but I manage a weak smile
and shake my head. ‘I’m spending it at Glinda’s parents with Mum and Claire.’

‘You’re so lucky to have Glinda, you know,’ she ruefully tells me.

Wait – am I detecting a hint of regret in her voice? Surely not.

‘I am sorry for everything,’ she then
continues to my great astonishment. ‘But it’s not as if I went without punishment. Most of our year wouldn’t talk to me, not to mention what Eric gave me.’

That’s true
. I recall the hostility from the other girls, and I definitely recall the rapid-fire spreading rumour of Eric’s STI present...
Crap
. Last night I was also sexually stupid and I may have caught something unpleasant from Theo. Great. Now I’ve had that alarming thought I can’t tease Tiggy seeing as it seems these things can happen quite easily in the heat of the moment, not that I think Tiggy and
Eric
had heat. Oh yuck – these are disturbing images I’d rather not have pop up.      

‘It’s fine.
It’s in the past.’

Somehow, I think I almost mean
that.

‘Than
ks, Geli.’

S
he smiles, and it’s a smile that takes me back to more innocent times. It spurs me on to congratulate her properly this time. If Tiggy can make the effort, so can I.

‘Well done on your engagement by the way.
Truly. It is a gorgeous ring.’

‘Thanks. To be honest, I’m a bit surprised we’re engaged already, but when you know what you want, you’ll do
anything
to get it,’ she crows.

There it is!
It’s her crowing that makes me suspicious of her motives – I was right to sense a hidden agenda behind this wedding, although perhaps it’s just old ghosts reminding me of her old behaviour. Perhaps she has changed. Perhaps
I
should make an effort. I’m probably reading too much into all of this.