Going Nowhere (14 page)

Everything narrowed into tunnel vision and I stopped breathing. Of course, this would happen now. My breath hitched in my throat and I looked over to Jason. As if feeling my stare he turned towards me smiling, but the smile died when he got a look at my face. Frowning, he called over another guy and spoke quickly to him. He then made his way around the bar toward
us, propelling me into motion.

Pushing Trent out of the way I scooted out of the booth and made my way outside, ignoring Declan and Emily who called out after me. I couldn’t believe that just when things were falling into place with us he was leaving.

Was this why he wanted things to progress?

One last fuck before going on tour?

Would he become that stupid fucking panty dropper again?

             
I walked around the building to a quiet and private area. Leaning against the wall I put a hand to my chest to try and stop the pounding.

“Marisol!” Jason yelled, before turning the corner and coming to a stop when he saw me leaning against the wall. “Hey.” He said softly, approaching me. Coming up close to me he put his hands on either side of my head and tilted my head up until I was looking into his eyes. I could feel the tears, filling up my eyes making him go blurry. Jason got a frantic look on his face and brought me into a hug, resting his mouth on my forehead so I could feel his lips moving as he spoke. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, taking comfort from him even though he was the reason I was hurting. Taking another deep breath, I sagged against him, causing him to hold me tightly.

“When were you going to tell me you were leaving?” I asked brokenly. Jason’s hand, which was rubbing my back, froze and he leaned away from me a little so he could see my face. His eyes searched mine, before he closed them and took a breath.

“I was going to tell you tonight.” He said. I pushed myself out of his arms and put a little space between us. His nearness was distracting me.

“Of course you were.” I said, my voice so bland I blinked at the sound. Jason took my arms and dragged my back to him, holding me fiercely.

“Don’t do this, Marisol.” He said harshly. His fingers held onto me so tightly I could feel the fabric bunching on my back.

“Don’t do what, Jason? Leave? Don’t worry, you’re doing that for the both of us.” I said angrily
.

“I’m not leaving you, not like that, I thought-“ He trailed off as I struggled against him. Loosening his grip he stared down at me
until I stopped and waited for him to speak. “I want this to work. I want you and I to work, Marisol. My leaving isn’t going to change that.”

“So I’m not just some fuck before you go off and become the Panty Dropper?” I asked bitterly, making air quotes around that disgusting nickname. His eyes widened briefly in surprise before his brows slammed down in anger.

“Is that what you think of me? Do you not know me by now? How many times are you going to throw that in my face? What the fuck, Marisol?!” He said furiously. He pushed away from me in disgust and walked away, fisting his hair in his hands in frustration. “Goddammit!”

I watched the rigidness of his back nervously. I started feeling like an ass. He would never do that; I knew this. Closing my eyes, I berated myself, before walking over to him. My hand hovered for a moment before touching his back.

The moment I made contact he spun around and pinned me against the wall. His face got so close to mine that his breath mingled mine and I waited, breathing heavily. Such a bad time, but I could feel myself getting wet. I cursed as my nipples hardened because I knew he could feel them.

H
is eyes dilated and his breathing changed. It was my only warning before his mouth crashed down on mine and he began to own me with it. His tongue invaded mine, tangling with my own. His mouth forced mine so wide that I could do nothing, but let him kiss me. My hands crept behind his back, nails digging into him as I held on.

Jason let out a groan before he grabbed my thigh and lifted it around his hip, bringing us even closer. I shivered and let out a moan as I felt his erection agai
nst me, grinding into me at the most perfect angle, I could come from the pressure. His hands left my face, and immediately found my breasts, thumbs brushing my nipples. My knees went weak and Jason grabbed the back of my other thigh to lift me against him so I was straddling him while he pinned against the wall. He began to pump his hips into me, mimicking what he wanted to do without the barrier of our clothing. I whimpered again and he tore his mouth from mine, staring at me hungrily before attacking my neck. My head tilted to the side and I fisted a hand in his hair, tugging hard causing him to growl against my skin and bite down on my shoulder.

“Jason!” I gasped his name as I got closer and closer to coming. I couldn’t believe we were going at it like fucking teenagers outside a bar with all of our friends inside.

“God, baby, you’re so fucking wet. I can feel it through your jeans.” As he spoke, his hand moved down, cupping me where I wanted him most. I threw my head back against the brick wall at the feel of him there, the pain of my head hitting against the brick not even registering.

I was on fire for him.

“Jason!” I cried out again, feeling that familiar pull in my lower belly. I started to writhe in his arms as the feeling got closer and closer. Oh fuck, I was going to come. Jason moaned my name and whispered encouragement in my ear, his breath hot against my skin, adding fuel to the fire.

“Come for me, baby.
Come on.” He growled, pumping his hips faster, rubbing his hand against me harder.

I moaned, close to the edge. Then his mouth latched onto my breast, first one then the other, tonguing me through my
top before sucking hard and sending me right over the edge.

I yelled his name, wild for him, not caring that we were practically in public. Jason cu
rsed fluently as I came apart in his hands. It seemed to go on forever. I’ve never come so hard and we weren’t even naked.

Finally
, the clenching in my body slowed down. I laid my head against his shoulder, breathing hard, my body still shivering with after shocks. I was thankful he was still supporting me because I pretty sure I would’ve melted to the floor. We were silent for a long time. Jason, breathing like he just ran a race, was pressing little kisses against my temple, murmuring soothing things in my hair that I couldn’t understand because I was still in LaLa land.

“Are you still mad at me for being a jackass?” I whispered. His hands tightened, hugging me closer to him as he began to laugh. I pulled back a little and rested my
forehead against his. “I’m sorry, Jase.” I leaned in and gave him a soft peck on his lips, licking at them a little when I felt how wet they were. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips and then on the forehead before putting me down. He stared at me with an anxious look on his face.

“I was never mad, more frustrated and scared. Just-“ He paused, throat working, before he continued, “Just don’t jump to conclusions like that again, ok? You know me better than that. You will never be just some fuck to me.” He paused, emotions running across his face. Seeing how upset he was to even repeat what I said, I felt ashamed all over again.

“I know, I guess I just freaked out a little.” I shoved a hand through my hair, “It’s just that, this is the first time I’ve done anything like this with someone and I don’t know how to navigate. This is all moving so fast and I feel like I can’t keep up and now you’re leaving and I don’t know how it’s going to work. I feel pretty insecure about how to proceed, I don’t want to mess it up and you are just way too good for me, Jason. I don’t deserve you.” I closed my eyes tightly, aggravated that I didn’t have a filter with him. “I both love and hate how easily I can talk to you, you know? I reveal a lot more about myself than I want to at times.”

“That’s bullshit, baby. Don’t think about us like that, you’ll doom it before it even gets off the ground. You’re perfect for me.” He pauses, brushing my hair off my face and giving me little kisses on my forehead. “Listen, I have to get back inside before James kills me for letting him man the bar solo on a Friday. Where are you sleeping tonight?”

“Emily’s. I promised Mikey I’d be there in the morning.” I said quietly, laying my cheek on his chest for one last hug. He kissed my hair one more time and the pulled back, taking my hand. Leading me back to the front of the bar.

“Ok. Good.” He muttered to himself the rest of the way to the door and I smiled at how awkwardly he was walking. Before we reached the entrance he pulled me in for one more drugging kiss. “It’s going to be hard as hell serving drinks with this.” He laughed, waving at his very noticeable erection. I grinned back at him.

“Sorry.”

“No, you’re not.” He laughed.

“No, I’m not.” I agreed smugly. “Hey, would you send Emily out? I’m going to call us a cab, I’m ready to go.”

“You’re good?” He asked nervously, searching my eyes. I hate that I made him skittish with me now. I nodded and then gave him another quick kiss for assurance.

“I’m fine, it’s just that I’m wearing a silk shirt and you kinda made it difficult to, uh, well, look-“ I trailed off as I opened my jacket to show him the wet marks where his mouth was. Two dark circles, right where my nipples were. He stared for a long time and I felt my face catching fire before I broke his concentration by closing my jacket. He looked up at me with a hot look.

“That’s fucking sexy, baby. I’ll go get Em. See you later.” He ran his hand all the way down my hair and kissed me quick before disappearing inside. I was finishing up my phone call with the cab company when Emily came running out. Looking around sharply, she bolted towards me when she saw me.

“Why the hell does my brother look properly fucked?” She accused. Then she got a good look at me, “You do, too!”

I immediately started to fidget, “We didn’t have sex, Emily.”

“Yeah, just everything but. When the hell did this happen?” She asked incredulously. I thought for a minute.

“I think from the moment we met.” I said quietly. She shook her head at me and began texting someone on her phone. Within twenty minutes we were home, changed, in bed, and it was glorious. I felt so freaking relaxed. I guess that was largely thanks for Jason. Thinking about him, I drifted off to sleep, a smile on my face.

Later on that night, I woke to someone climbing in bed with me. My heart started to pound until I felt familiar arms drag me closer and a warm body spoon me from behind. I must have made a little noise because Jason immediately nuzzled me and whispered, “Go back to sleep, baby.” Ignoring him, I turned around on my other side so we were facing each other. We stared at each other in silence for a moment, before I snuggled closer, giving into the feeling of contentment I got from just having him near me.

“I thought I’d see you tomorrow.” I mumbled, closing my eyes and resting my head against his chest.

“I don’t have a lot of time before I leave and I want to spend what little I do with you. Go back to sleep, I’ll see you in the morning.” He whispered. I drifted back to sleep was thinking I could get used to this.

“What are you guys doing?” I opened my eyes to see Mikey’s little face staring at me curiously. It took a minute for me to register what was going on. I eyes opened wide when I realize that Jason was still wrapped around me and Mikey was seeing it.

“Uh-Oh my God.” I squeaked. I tried to untangle myself when Jason’s arms tightened around me, making it impossible for me to move. I started elbowing him to wake his ass up, my face bright red.

“Mari, stop it, it’s too early.” He grumbled from behind me.

“Jason, get up!” I yelled, now struggling even harder as Mikey looked at us both.

“Did Uncle Jase sleepover?” Mikey asked, climbing up on the bed and bouncing at the idea.

I burrowed my head in the pillow, wishing I could disappear. Jason didn’t seem embarrassed at all; just sat up and grabbed Mikey, wrestling him on the bed, sending him into a fit of giggles. I turned over and stared at the two green eyes staring back at me with identical goofy grins. I narrowed my eyes at the laughter in Jason’s and slapped his arm.

“This is not funny Jason Scott!” I growled. I continued to hit him while he laughed and Mikey screeched and threw himself on top of both of us.

“Well isn’t this a cozy scene, makes me wish I had my camera.” Emily said, leaning against door. I closed my eyes and dragged the covers over my head. My humiliation was now complete.

“Morning, Em
my Lou!” Jason said cheerily, settling against me again. I tried to pull away, but he just tucked me under him, propping his elbow on my stomach as he looked at his sister.

“Jason get the hell off me, right now!” I yelled.

“Emily, get your demon child out of here, you guys are embarrassing Mari.”

“No, you’re embarrassing me!” I punched the arm that he was using to prop himself up on, causing his head to crash onto my stomach. I huffed as the air was pushed out of my lungs and growled in frustration. Since no one was moving, I got out of bed and glared at everyone
, even little Mikey. I grabbed one of Jason’s hoodies off the floor, threw it over my tank top and boxer shorts and marched out of the guest room towards the kitchen to make coffee. Screw them! “You all suck!”

“Oohh! Marisol cussed, Mommy! She’s a cusser! You should put her in time out.” Mikey yelled, I rolled my eyes at the little turncoat and fumbled around the kitchen looking for pancake mix.

“Mikey! If you want pancakes, I suggest you stop tattling on me! Can’t make pancakes if I’m in timeout!” I called out to him and immediately heard his footfalls pound on the floor until he was seated at the kitchen table, trying to look angelic. I smirked at him. Yeah, kid, I got your number. “Where are mommy and Uncle Jase?”

“Mommy said they have to talk in privates.”

“It’s in private.” I corrected automatically, my thoughts on the conversation going on in the back room.

I hoped Emily wasn’t pissed about Mikey finding us in bed together. I stared at the pancakes, bubbling in the frying pan and decided to add some sprinkles to the one I was cooking up for Emily. Maybe a little bribery would help. Flipping two onto a plate I set them in front of Mikey, ruffling his hair as I got back to cooking, lost in thought.
I was working on a really good apology speech to Emily, there were a lot of compliments and puppy dog eye moments, when I felt arms encircle me from behind and lips at my neck.

“Morning, baby.” Jason whispered soft
ly against my skin, heating me all over.

I leaned back into him for a moment, resting my head against his bare chest and then bumped him back with my butt, gaining some distance. He didn’t let go of me, but he wasn’t pinning me to the counter any longer. I turned around and looked at hi
m. He was sleep ruffled and warm looking. I smiled and ran my fingers down the pillow imprints on the side of his face. His eyes were soft while he was looking at me; it made my throat tight.

“Are you
guys’ boyfriend and gurfwend now?” Mikey called out from behind us. My body froze and I looked pleadingly at Jason to back away and sit down. I let out a sigh when he parked his handsome butt next to his nephew.

“That’s a good question, my genius son. I was wondering the same thing.” Emily said, coming into the kitchen, raising an eyebrow as she took a seat next to the boys.

“Uh-” I stuttered when all eyes turned towards me.

Not sure why I was the spokesperson in this relationship. Just using the word was foreign to me, but I guess that’s what we were doing.

A relationship. I have a boyfriend. Jason is my boyfriend.

Nope, still sounded weird.

I looked at him for a little help and he had an identical look to his nephew and sister. They were all curious as to what I would say.

I rolled my eyes and snapped, “I don’t know, he hasn’t asked me yet.”

Grumbling under my breath I turned back around and fixed Jason and Emily plates, making sure Emily got the best ones even though she totally put me on the spot. I refrained from spitting in Jason’s for leaving me hanging. Jerk. He’d probably eat it anyway.

I turned and set a plate in front of Emily who was smirking at me, so I did what any highly educated adult would do, scratch
ed my nose with my middle finger. I went to put the plate in front of Jason when he snaked an arm around my waist and dragged me onto his lap. It sounds a lot hotter than it is, because I was currently sprawled across him, legs in an awkward angle and I could feel little Jason stirring against my ass.

Shoving an elbow into his stomach, I climbed off him and grabbing a plate for myself, I sat down next to them. Jason was writing something on a napkin and my brows furrowed. He folded the napkin, still not looking at me, and passed it to Mikey, whispering in his ear. Mikey passed it to Emily without looking, not that he could re
ad it anyway, but at least the Little Man knew to respect privacy. Unlike his mother, who immediately opened it and read it, eyes shooting to Jason’s, then mine, a big smile curving her lips.

My heart started to pound while I considered what was written on that napkin, I watched as she put the napkin on the table and with two fingers, slid it across to me. I picked it up, hands sweating and opened it. I immediately burst out laughing. Jason had written,

Will you be my girlfriend?

Check

__yes __no or __maybe

I held my hand out to him, without looking at him yet wanting to make him sweat, although he probably knew my answer. My hand closed around the pen he was
using and I checked “yes,” folded the napkin back up and slid it across to Jason. I was smiling so hard my cheeks were starting to hurt.

I watched his face as he saw it, watched as his dimples flash when he smiled big and then he leaned towards me, grasping his sweatshirt that I was still wearing to bring me to him, and planted a big one on me in front of everyone.

I giggled against his lips and felt his mouth curl up in response. I pulled back a little and he kissed the tip of my nose and gave me an Eskimo kiss, before sitting back in his chair and digging into his pancakes.

I looked for the napkin and couldn’t find it. I didn’t want to lose it. I leaned back to look under the table and saw Jason pat the pocket of his sweatpants, letting me know he had it. I relaxed and dug into my breakfast, letting the conversation wash over me as I ate. After everyone was done eating I went into the guest room and began getting my stuff together. I’m in the middle of shoving my clothes from last night into my giant purse when Jason walks in.

“What’re you doing?” He asks, sitting on the end of the bed, watching me. I glance up at him for a second and smile a little, thinking how odd it was that we were together now. Methinks I protested too much in the beginning.

“Getting my crap together so I can get home and shower. I feel gross.”

“Ok, well, what’re you doing for the rest of the day?”

“Nothing, why? You gonna wine and dine me now that you’re my man?” I ask archly, turning to him with my hip cocked and hand in place. My heart starts a slow thump when he stands up and pulls me to him so every part of the front of me aligns with him. I don’t even try to hide the shudder that runs through my body and tilt my head back so I can see his face.

“Your man, huh?” He asks, voice deep with satisfaction.

“Yeah,” I breathe out, “I think I’m going to be possessive of you. You should have seen how I murdered those girls in my head when they were hanging all over you at the bar that first night.” Yeah, I just admitted that.
Didn’t even care anymore, I knew it was impossible to try and hide anything from him. It’s like his eyes were hypnotic. He smiles, dimple winking, and drops a quick kiss on my mouth.

“Don’t get embarrassed, baby. Watching you dance with Declan made me want to rip of
f his head and stand over his body while I beat my chest.”

“Aw, you
wanted to go cave man on me?” I ask laughing.

“Damn straight. You’re mine. I’m just glad you finally realized it.” He cocks his head at me and grins. I
detangle myself from him and move to grab my bag.

“Give me a ride?” I ask.

“Sure, baby, let me find some shoes.” He said and then began hunting around the floor for a pair. “Wait! What about your car?”

“I’ll just leave it here for now.
I planned on coming back here anyway. Would you care about dropping me off here later?” I asked. I wanted to spend as much time with him before he left too, and that included the fifteen-minute drive to my house.

“
I don’t care.” He said, tugging on some sneakers.

I shouldered my bag and made my way out the bedroom to go say goodbye to Emily and Mikey. I found them snuggled up on the couch watching cartoons. I gave Mikey a big smooch on th
e head and I told Emily I’d see her later and walked out the door, waiting for Jason to unlock his beast of a truck. He came bounding out of the house a second after me and unlocked the car with the beep. We both got in the car in silence and he handed over his iPod. Propping my feet on his dashboard I began to scroll through.

“So you never answered me.” He said.

“Remind me again?” I said, distracted.

“What’re you doing for the rest of the day?” He asked rolling his eyes at me. Settling on a song, I rolled down the window and sat back against the window, facing him slightly. I rested my head against the seat and stared at him while he drove.

“Hanging out with you?” I ask, smiling a little. He glanced over at me and got that look in his eyes, the soft one that I was starting to love. “The fact that I’m in your car should have answered that for you, babe.”

“God, you’re so smart.” He deadpanned, making me laugh.

“Does this mean I can ask you a bunch of questions?” I ask. He looked at me, once we stopped at a red light and gave me a confused look.

“What do you mean?”

“I just feel like I know nothing about you while you know pretty much everything about me.”

“That’s not true.”

“Jase, come on, I’m in a continuous state of word vomit whenever I’m around you, but I get nothing in return. Let me bombard you with questions. It’ll make me feel like we’re on more equal footing.”

“Fine.” He heaved a sigh, “But you better pack a bag for tonight.”

“Uh, negative Ghost Rider. I’m going to St. Augustine with the Rents for the day tomorrow. Wedding stuff.” I put my feet back on the ground and gathered my purse when we pulled onto my street.

I looked over at him again to ask what the plan was for today and saw his jaw tensing, fingers flexing on the steering wheel. I reached over to him and ran a finger down the side of his face, drawing his attention to me.

“What’s wrong, Jase?” I asked and he looked over at me, anxious.

“I just want to spend as much time as I can with you before I have to leave.” I sit back quietly, something about the way he said that had me tensing up, but before I could say anything we were pulling into my driveway and he was opening his door. “Come on, baby, I want to meet your parents.” Immediately my attention was averted and horrific scenes of my mother showing Jason bridal magazines swam in front of my eyes. I threw myself out of the car and ran up to him, blocking him from the door.

“Hold on, slow down.” I said, heaving a breath from the sprint and the horror of him meeting my parents.

“I’m meeting your parents.” He said in a hard voice, eyes narrowed at me.

“Yeah, fine, whatever. Just-“ I struggled for words, “Just keep an open mind. My dad’s cool but he still thinks I’m five and my mom-“ I wince a little, how to begin?

“Your mom?” He was so not getting it. I huffed out a frustrated breath.

“Look. In a nutshell, it’s her mission in life to see me married and pregnant, the sooner the better. She’s probably going to be super embarrassing; I don’t know-“ I broke off because his lips met mine in a hard kiss, shutting me up. I stared back at him mute and dumb while he ran his hand down the length of my hair, soothing me.

“Marisol, calm down. I’m sure I’m going to love them. I just need to make sure they love me. Don’t be embarrassed about the way people love you.” Giving me another quick kiss, he grabbed my hand and tugged me towards the door. Taking a deep, calming breath I moved ahead of him and let myself into the house.