Harkett's Haven (11 page)

‘You get a great view of the cottage from here.....look.’

The sun was in their eyes and they both raised a hand to shield their eyes and look towards the little white cottage on the mainland and it was then that Rachel noticed a car parked down at the beach they had left. It was unusual; she could count on one hand the number of times she had seen anyone take a car there in the six months she had lived at the cottage and a strange car always spooked her.

‘Pass me that bag please Eric
’ She indicated which of the bags she wanted from him.

She pulled open the zip and took out a pair of bin
oculars. She focussed the lense to the silver car parked at the end of the beach track and then scanned along the sand to check for someone walking a dog or something to explain its presence there. No one. But even at this distance she could make out the distinctive silver Mercedes Estate car.

She scanned back up to her house and there was no sign
of strangers but tension and worry suffused her body.

‘Anything wrong Rachel?’ Eric picked up on her concern immediately.

‘There’s a strange car at the beach beside the cottage,’ she whispered.

She turned to him, ‘It’s the reason I had to let you know what happened to me. I
’m still jumpy....I can’t help it.’

He took the binoculars from her and focussed on the beach. She saw a fleeting look of recognition on his face.

‘Do you know the car?’

He hesitated and then answered decisively, ‘No.
Sorry.......probably someone walking a dog Rachel.’

He turned from her to put
the binoculars back in the bag.

‘You’
re a hopeless liar Eric Harket,.’
she thought to herself and she knew that when he turned quickly from her it was to prevent him having to meet her waiting gaze. She knew he was lying but she couldn’t imagine why. Still, it gave her some comfort that he at least seem to know who it was and if that was the case then it couldn’t be anything to do with Tom.

His mood had changed and he looked distracted and irritated.

‘Eric. Are you alright?’

He smiled at her but it was a strained smile, tight and false.

‘Yes. Now tell me what you’d like me to do.’

Rachel set out the grid square and told him
what she needed, leaving him and walking the ten or so metres to the water line to start work there. She watched Eric secretly as she worked and could see him frequently glance at the mainland beach in the distance. He worked silently and his previous light mood was gone.

Rachel felt
anger rise in her, hot and dark. She had put a lot of trust in this man in the short time she had known him; he was the first man she had felt she might be able to develop a relationship with after Tom and her feelings had raced up on her, catching her by surprise. Her instincts had told her Eric was a man that would be worth taking a chance on, someone who would help her put her past behind her. Here she was feeling betrayed and hurt by his deceit. Rachel reflected that the old Rachel, the pre-Tom Rachel, would have simply shrugged his reaction off. A small lie, Eric’s own private business. But the Rachel that she had become, the scared, scarred Rachel couldn’t forgive this deceit, whatever his reasons, so easily.

As she watched him, she decided
to cut short her trip to the island; there wasn’t anything here that couldn’t be done another day and as much as she wanted to finish her work here and enjoy her day with Eric in the place she lkie placeloved, she could tell that his mood had darkened by the sight of the car on the beach and saw little point in continuing with their day.

S
he felt weary........and also betrayed, a fool for trusting so easily. There was obviously something he wasn’t telling her. She could see he brooded and worried.

She quietly packed up her things which didn’t go unnoticed by Eric.

‘What’s wrong Rachel?’

He stood up, watching her intently. He pulled his hand
through his dark curls, frustrated.

‘I think it’s best we go back Eric. I’ve done enough for now.’

She shrugged her shoulders, a tight, angry gesture. She felt cold and hard inside.

‘What about lunch? I thought we
would be here most of the day.’

‘Look Eric. I don’t know what’s going on but I know you’re not telling me the truth
....... about the car we saw...’ She fiddled with the zip on her jacket, somehow finding it difficult to meet his gaze.

She continued, ‘
You’re not happy....and I just want to get back home..... get back on with work.’

‘Rachel....’ He kicked out at the sand, sending a spray into the a
ir around him. Her heart leapt in her chest, his actions reminding her of Tom’s rapid mood changes and outbursts.

‘Look Rachel. I know whose car it was. I just
.......didn’t want to worry you. I need to deal with this myself.’

He moved towards her and
she instinctively took a step back from him. He stopped in his tracks momentarily, confused by her recoil and then decisively closed the short distance between. He held her arms and pulled her into him, his strength overpowering her weak refusal.

He held her close and
ran his large hands up her back.

‘
It’s Claire’s car.’ His voice was gentle but firm.

She tried to move from him but he held her tight to him.

‘I’ve.....I’ve been sleeping with Claire for the last year, maybe longer.’

Rachel remained silent. She knew he had had a relation
ship with Claire but had assumed it had been short term, occasional. She again tried to move from him but he restrained her again. She could feel his growing tumescence against her as her held her and it made her uneasy.

As if in acknowledgement of his growing arousal he muttered,

‘God, Rachel, you don’t know what you do to me...’ He continued, his voice strained, ‘I don’t know what she’s doing here but I must assume it’s something to do with me. She must be looking for me.’

He paused, ‘
I don’t want.... I won’t let....anything to get in the way of us.’

She pushont+0">She
ed him away from her, using all her strength.

‘Stop.’
Her voice was strained and cold and she held her hands out to him, warning him not to come closer.

He looked surprised and hurt.

‘I’m sorry Eric. I can’t do this.’ She sighed miserably, knowing that she had to cut this developing relationship off for her own peace but still desiring him physically, wanting his touch, his company.

‘I’m not ready for
these kind of....complications. I came here for simplicity....I need the simplicity of this place. You....well.....you’re a complication I don’t need.’

He closed
his eyes, a pained expression on his face.

‘
Look, Claire was a solace,  someone who was there when I needed ......sex. It maybe wasn’t fair to her, and I guess, well.....I guess it was easy for me to continue with her even when I saw her become more emotionally dependant on me.....because it suited me.’

She felt a strange mix of sympathy for
Eric but also anger at the way he had treated Claire.  He was a strong, handsome, virile man; a widower struggling to bring up a young child. She understood his needs. But he had used this woman for his own physical needs, leading her to believe in their partnership and then dropping her in a casual and indifferent way when he chose to move on. She couldn’t reconcile the thoughtful, strong and apparently principled man that stood in front of her trying to explain himself sincerely with that of the unfeeling way he had thrown Claire aside.

‘I always knew that she wasn’t right for me....or for
Esme. I feel ashamed that I acted the way I’ve done but ....there’s been times in the years since Sarah died that I’ve struggled to get through each day.’ He held her gaze steadily and Rachel knew that he was speaking from the heart. ‘ The only thing that kept me going was the physical release from our meetings. It made me forget.....for a short time at least.... the mess I made of my family, the hurt I’d caused Esme.’

‘Please Eric...’ she tried to stop him, sensing the extreme effort
this confession was costing him.

He r
aised his hand, ‘No Rachel. I need to let you know that I’ve some skeletons in the closet too.’

‘I minimised the contact she had with
Esme, deliberately I think, meeting her after Esme had gone to bed, fucking her in the surgery, taking days off to spend with her at her place. It was sex.....fucking....call it what you want. It was no more. No less. A necessity for me.......survival’

‘I don’t think Claire saw it that way...’

‘After I spoke to her that day at the house......she hasn’t stopped calling.’

‘I heard what
you said to her Eric....she didn’t deserve that.’

He sighed, ‘No. You’re right. She didn’t deserve what idteserve I said to her but you....you kind of knocked me for six. The moment I took you back into the house, cared for you, saw Esme with you...I knew I wanted you.’

Rachel laughed bitterly.

‘Well you’ve had me now Eric.’

‘
Oh God Rachel. When I said I wanted you, yes. it’s sexual. Sexual like I’ve never known with another woman but it’s more than that. You’re so beautiful. You have that peace.... knowledge about you, otherworldliness, an aura....God, I don’t know how to describe how I feel.....I’ve always been bloody awful talking about my how I feel.......I just know you’re someone I want, need to be with. Someone I can’t stop thinking about.’

His face was flushed with colour, his eyes searching the ground in front of him
, looking for the right words.

Her heart went to hi
m as he stood there on the sand, trying to explain his feelings for her.

She went to him and put her fingers against his lips.

‘I want to get to know you better Eric. I want to take a chance.’

Eric’s face lit up and he bent to kiss her, holding her close, his
tongue pushing gently into her. His arms enfolded her, pressing her close and she responded to him because she couldn’t resist and didn’t want to. His body was powerful and hot and his need for her was swelling as he kissed her.

She pushed him again from her, gently this time.

‘Come on Eric. We need to get back. Looks like the weather’s on the change again and I don’t want to get stuck here.’

The weather had changed. The wind
was picking up and the calm sea was starting to churn, angry, black clouds pushing in on the land. Spring time on the West coast of Scotland was often a time of turbulent weather change and this spring was no different.

Quickly packing, they raced back to the boat and endured the bumpy journey back to the mainland, the wind gaining in strength. It was with relief that they made land before the rain started. Claire’
s car was nowhere to be seen.

Eric helped get the boat hitched back t
o the old Land Rover just as heavy drops of rain started to fall from the sky. A few drops turned quickly to a torrential downpour and they were both soaked to the skin. They threw the bags in the back of the 4x4 and raced to climb in to the shelter of the old car.

Rachel drove through the sheets of rain carefully, struggling at times to see the
road, such was the ferocity of the downpour.

She couldn’t help notice Eric watch her as she drove the short distance to her home, making her aware that
her thin cotton shirt was clinging to her like a second skin. She garaged the boat and they raced for the door.