Authors: Ally Forbes
Steadying herself by holding on to
the kitchen table she moved her unwilling legs and made her way to the door.
She jumped when more
knocks rained on the door just as her hand closed on the latch.
Opening
the door a crack she half expected the door to be pushed in on her.
It was Eric a
nd Esme, standing in the cold, happy expectant faces, clutching a tub of ice cream.
Eric took one look at Rachel’s terrified face and
pushed the door in and took her in his arms. ‘God, what’s happened Rachel?’
Rachel bit hard on her lip trying not to cry in front of
Esme who had stepped into the house, carton of ice cream clutched in her small arms.
She pushed Eric away gently and went to
Esme and hugged her.
She kneeled in front of her, ‘Is this for us to share?’
Esme nodded silently, a small, shy smile lighting up her face.
‘
Go and sit on the sofa. I’ll put on the TV and bring over some plates.’ Rachel was glad that she had managed to get the fire going again. Even with her things cleared, there was still warmth and comfort emanating from the crackling stove.
Rachel switched the TV
on and tucked Esme up in a blanket, kissing the top of her head. The little girl smiled at her, her eyes moving to the picture of a whale shark that drifted across the screen.
Eric was standing in the kitchen, his hand on the case open on the kitchen table. His face was ashen.
He watched Esme on the sofa, trying not to alert her to their discussion, speaking to Rachel in a low urgent voice,
‘What the hell’s going on Rachel?’ His face was worried and perplexed.
‘I have to leave Eric.’ What else could she say?
‘You don’t have to leave. I’m here for you. I’ll protect you from whatever ......whoever...you’re scared of.’ His voice was
earnest, forceful.
She felt calm and resigned.
‘I’m not going to drag you into my messy life Eric.’ She pulled the band from her long hair and let it spill over her shoulders, and indulging her nervous habit, she twisted the ends of her dark hair into ringlets.
‘Events have overtaken and I have to leave......I’m very sorry.....,’ she paused and smiled weakly at him, ‘Look. I’ve had a great time and I’m so glad I’ve met you. You’ve really helped me to move on.....It’s really been
. .......great.’
He took her by the shoulders, his black eyes dark as
pitch, his anger sparking almost visibly.
‘You’re not leaving me Rachel. I’ll do whatever it takes to see your problems through. I’ll not leave your side.’ He traced his finger gently down her face.
‘God Rachel. What’s happened since I left? You look totally exhausted.’
Rachel shook her head
wearily and sighed, ‘Let’s get some ice cream. Esme’ll need to get to her bed soon.......What possessed you both to come out here at this time of night?’
He glanced at her suitcase lying half filled on the kitchen table.
‘I collected Esme from school, I made some calls, she did her homework, had dinner......all the normal stuff. She asked if I’d seen you today and I told her I had.’ He paused, searching for the right words to explain, ‘I see no point in lying to her. I sometimes think she knows me better than I know myself.’
‘Kids are good at the emotional blackmail stuff and she said that if I could take a day off to see you it was only fair that she should get a chance to visit you too.’ He smiled as he watched her on the sofa.
‘She suggested that we pick up some of the Henry’s homemade ice cream and take it over to you as a good night......and well...you know how I feel about you.....I didn’t need asking twice.’
Rachel turned from him and took three plates off the shelf.
His hands snaked round her flat stomach and he pressed himself into her and whispered into her ear.
‘Would you have left without saying goodbye Rachel?’
His breath was hot on her neck and faher nec sent shivers up and down her back.
‘Because I
wouldn’t....couldn’t ...... let you go.’ Rachel’s breathing quickened and she turned fast into his arms, staring into his fathomless black eyes.
‘That’s what Tom used to say.’ She pushed past him and
scooped some ice cream into each plate, leaving him with his head hung, staring at the floor.
She sat beside
Esme on the sofa and handed her a plate of ice cream. Esme looked tired but happy and content and it broke Rachel’s heart to think that she would be leaving this little girl who had made such a strong connection with her in so short a time. She tucked up beside Rachel and they both started to eat. The wildlife programme was still on TV and Esme was mesmerized.
‘Fantastic ice cream
Esme.’
Esme
smiled, ‘Dad says he’s never tasted better. I think so too. Henry makes it with the milk from his cows........we thought you’d like it.’
Eric joined them on the sofa. He sat on the other side of
Esme and mouthed ‘Sorry’ at her.
Rachel felt a deep sadness that she had to l
eave Eric and Esme. She had an instinctive feeling that she could make a strong, lasting and loving relationship with father and daughter. But she couldn’t let herself think about what could be. She had to deal with what was. The here and now.
They ate in silence, the deliciou
s creamy, cold ice cream a wonderful, comforting tonic to the despair and sense of inevitable defeat she felt inside.
Esme
’s eyes were closing, flickering open and then succumbing to the overwhelming urge to close. Rachel turned to Eric and whispered, ‘Dad, I think Esme needs her bed.’
‘It’s been a long time since someone’s spoken to me like that.’
He was lost in his own thoughts.
Rachel s
miled, feeling a protective urge to put Esme to bed and make sure she was warm and comfortable.
Eric stood from the sofa and gently took
Esme’s nodding head and laid her out on the sofa. Rachel switched the TV off. Esme’s eyes closed and Rachel covered her with the blanket. Rachel stood for a moment watching the sleeping child, so peaceful and trusting. She yearned for that time of her life when life was simple and she worried only for her lost toy or an argument with a school friend although she knew that Esme had had more than her fair share of heartbreak and anguish in her young life.
‘She’s beautiful Eric.’ Rachel whispered.
Eric put his arms round her and pulled her into his embrace. His arms felt strong and loving, secure.
She felt him take a deep breath and
rest his head on her.
‘I need to speak to you. Please just give me some time.’
He took her hand and walked to the kitchen. Taking her case from the table, he plpantable, aced it quietly on the floor and pulled out two chairs, motioning for her to sit down.
She did a
s she was asked.
‘I’ve fallen in love with you Rachel......
I said before that I felt that electricity the moment I took you in my arms.’
He took her hand and looked at it, stroking it
, not meeting her gaze.
‘
Before I met you, I would have laughed at someone who believed in love at first sight.’ He smiled, his eyes crinkling. She watched him, his profile strong, perfect, masculine. She felt that familiar tingle of desire.
‘When I saw your cases packed toni
ght I felt like....my heart stopped, I swear......like I’d lost something I’d only just found, something that I’d been looking for all my life.’
‘Eric...’
He placed his fingers on her lips and fixed her with his dark eyes.
‘
Shh Rachel. I need this chance to....well...I just need this chance.’
‘I know that something’s happened between me leaving you this afternoon and arriving here tonight. I know that if we hadn’t arrived unexpectedly tonight you would have left us without a
word and I have to assume that it’s something to do with Tom Sullivan......you seemed to be happy this afternoon.’
He paused and watched her. It was her turn to avert her eyes. She felt unable to meet his gaze, feeling faint again, sick of running, of lying.
‘I want to take care of you, to love you. You can’t keep running Rachel.......what can this man do? You’ve been out of his life for over a year. You can’t keep running....... it’s your life he’s taking away from you.’
She shook her head, weary of trying to explain the power this man had, his total control over every aspect of his life.
‘I want to give you....us......some more time. I want you to consider coming with Esme and me to a house I have in Nova Scotia, close to Halifax. It’s remote, somewhere we won’t be found. I haven’t been there for years. No-one will know of our plans, I promise. Just a few days, maybe a week...’
‘You can’t just walk out of your practice, take
Esme from school, leave your home,,....on a whim, for someone you hardly know?’ Her voice was hushed but urgent, upset.
‘I can do it and I will.’ He was calm and sure.
‘Please give us a chance Rachel.’
His gaze was direct and confident.
‘I know that if we go down this path, that at some point, whether it’s now , a month, six months, whatever, you and indirectly, Esme, will get dragged into something I don’t want you to be involved in.’
‘I
can handle myself. I’m capable of taking care of you and Esme. I give you my word.’
And h
is words were like honey,I w like h sweet and tempting. Could he take care of her? She worried about Esme being caught up in an emotional whirlwind that a girl of her age couldn’t possibly comprehend.
‘We’ll
leave tomorrow. Take a flight from Glasgow. I’ll call Esme off school for a short time, make something up. It won’t be for long.’
He stopped, searching her face for some kind of response.
‘Rachel I know you feel something for me. Give me....give us a chance. How often in life do you meet someone who is everything to you from the first?’
He took her
in his arms and kissed her deep and gentle. And her heart melted.
She broke his embrace,
‘Eric. I feel it’s the wrong thing to do because I know what will happen if I do what you ask. And it’s something that
will
happen. Not something that
might
happen. Things will get nasty very quickly...’
‘Please tell me what happened this afternoon. Please. I want to know so I can h
elp prepare for the storm that you say’s coming.’
She hesitated
but her heart was ruling her head and she yearned more than anything to stop being frightened and to stop running.
‘Claire.’ she said simply.
His brow furrowed, perplexed.
‘What about Claire?’
‘She was in the house when we arrived back this afternoon.’
His face blanched and then darkened
.
‘In the house?
While we were.....’
Rachel nodded.
‘She broke in?’ His voice was incredulous and louder.
Rachel placed her finger over her lips to quiet
his voice, worried that he would wake Esme.
‘She’s in love with you Eric.’