Healing Rain (4 page)

“Good luck at school tomorrow. I can't wait to hear about it,” she said with a smile.

I turned to look at her before I walked out the door. “Thanks. I'm sure it will be full of excitement,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Dr. Hope?”

“Yeah?” she asked, looking up at me.

“Do you really think I'm funny?”

She gave me a big grin. “Of course. I appreciate your sarcastic sense of humor.”

I tilted my head and shrugged. “Just wondering. I don't feel like our sessions are going to be filled with a lot of jokes, and I was wondering where you got the idea that I was funny.”

She laughed. “I meant everything I said to you. You are smart, Rain, and it shows in your sense of humor, even if I've only seen a little of it.”

I couldn't help but smile a little. “Thanks. See ya.”

“Bye, Rain,” she said, smiling back at me with that warm smile.

 

 

I must have tried on twenty different outfits before my first day of school. It wasn't like me to worry so much about my appearance, but I just couldn't help it. My mom had told me once when I was younger that you can only make a first impression once, and I wanted to make sure that the impression I left was the one that I wanted to make. The problem was, I just wasn't sure what I wanted that to be.

I hummed along mindlessly to the song on the radio as I stood at the door to my closet. If I wore a skirt or a sundress, that would label me a certain way. If I dressed down, wearing some of my comfortable shorts and a T-shirt, that would leave a different mark. I could wear girly colors like pink or yellow, which I had a lot of.
Or, I could wear
all
black to match my mood
, I thought grimly.

Like I said, it really wasn't like me to stress over clothes. At my old school, I had been pretty comfortable with who I was and with my group of friends. We all kind of dressed alike; we went shopping together and had similar tastes in clothes. But, after the way things turned out between me and my “friends,” I began to rethink things. Was that really my taste, or had I been just blending in? I didn't consider myself a follower, but I had never really dared to be different, either. The only thing that had set me apart from some of the others was how open I was in my faith in God. In that way, I was a leader; I organized the early morning prayer circles and weekly Bible study groups at lunch. But as far as everything else – where I shopped, how I dressed – I went along with the crowd. It wasn't just clothes, either; it went deeper than that. Did I cheer and play softball and volleyball and join all those clubs because that was what I really wanted to do, or did I do it because my friends did it? Because it was the popular thing to do? And the faith that had been such a huge part of my life, the one thing that I felt strongly enough about to be a leader – where had it gotten me? Where was the God I believed in so firmly when my life fell apart?

I spent the summer thinking about this, but I hadn't really reached any conclusions. On one hand, it would be good for me to jump back into all those hobbies. It would give me something to take my mind off of everything, and it would give me a chance to meet people and make friends. On the other hand, I had this urge to get away from it all and find a different path. It would be easy for me to fall back into the typical patterns I had been used to, but I felt like there was more to me than what I used to be. A part of me wasn't interested in getting involved or fitting in. Besides, I wasn't sure if those people were really the kind of people I wanted to be friends with after the way things turned out with the last group.

Finally, I decided I was completely overthinking the whole clothes situation, and went with jeans and a fitted purple T-shirt from a Breaking Ties concert I had gone to last summer. It was one of my favorite Indie rock bands. The only thing I was really sure about in my life was music, so I decided I couldn't go wrong with that. There wasn't enough time to straighten my hair, so I had to leave it wavy again. I put on a little makeup before I ran to the kitchen. Mom had actually gotten up and made scrambled eggs and toast, which I really appreciated, but I didn't have enough time to sit down and eat. I grabbed a piece of toast and a banana to eat on the way. Tyler and I gave Mom quick hugs and walked out the door.

Tyler practically ran the whole way to school. The kid could not have been more wired; he had been waiting for this day all summer. He didn't even want me to walk him up to the door. “Aww, Rain, just go on. I remember where to go, I promise,” he pleaded.

“Are you sure, Ty?” I asked him, giving him a worried look.

“Yes! This school is way smaller than my old one, and I used to walk in there all by myself. I promise I won't get lost,” he said, already walking away.

“Fine. Wait here after school and I'll meet you to walk home,” I told him.

“Rain, I'm seven years old. I'm not a baby,” he said, scowling.

“I know that. I just want to walk you home so I can hear all about your first day.” I smiled pleadingly. “Just wait here for me.”

He rolled his eyes. “Okay. Bye already.” He pretended to be frustrated with me, but I could see the smile he was trying to hide. He waved as he walked up to the school.

I watched him until he got inside, and then I walked the rest of the way to the high school. Students stood around outside in the parking lot, talking in groups by their cars. I walked through them, looking through my backpack for my schedule so that I could find my first class. Suddenly I really wished I had been able to concentrate more on the tour so that I would remember where to go.

I found the schedule and my first class right away. The teacher wasn't even in there yet, so I couldn't get in the door. Great. What should I do until school started? I saw a few students at their lockers down the hall, but then an older man walked up to them and they disappeared around the corner. When he caught a glimpse of me, he came walking toward me. “You know you're supposed to be in the gym,” he said.

I looked at him, puzzled. “I am?” I asked.

He glared at me for a second, and then his features softened. “Oh, are you new?” he asked, glancing down at the schedule I was holding.

“Yes,” I told him.

He smiled. “Well, if you get here before the bell rings, you're not allowed to be in the hallways. You have to go to the gym and sit there unless you have a pass from a teacher to be in here. I knew you couldn't have a pass on the first day,” he explained.

I gulped. The thought of walking into the gym alone with a bunch of students sitting in there to stare at me was intimidating. “Thanks, sir,” I mumbled, walking slowly around the corner toward the gym.

Luckily, when I walked in, no one really seemed to notice. There were people sitting around in groups talking, and a few students were playing basketball out on the court. I stood in the doorway for a bit, feeling awkward and looking around. I couldn't help but look for Ethan and wonder where he was sitting.

About that time, another student walked through the door and stood beside me. Like me, he seemed to be looking around the room and deciding where to go. He glanced down at me as I glanced up at him, and then he did a double-take. “Hey, nice shirt,” he said with a smile.

I looked up at him. “Thanks,” I said. “You know Breaking Ties?”

“Aww, yeah, I love them. I saw them on tour last summer,” he said excitedly.

“Me too!” I exclaimed. “It was a great show. We were right up against the stage.”

“So were we! Where did you see them?” he asked.

“St. Louis. How about you?”

“I saw them in Indianapolis. You went all the way to St. Louis?” he asked.

“Well, that's where I used to live. I'm new here,” I said with a half-smile.

“So that's why I don't recognize you. Wow, you used to live in St. Louis? You must think you're in the sticks,” he said with wide eyes.

“Yeah, it's different,” I said, laughing.

He laughed, too. “It's not so bad here once you get used to it. I just moved here about four years ago from Champaign. I was miserable at first, but now it's all right,” he said. “What year are you?”

“I'm a junior,” I told him.

“Cool, me too,” he said. “What's your schedule like?”

I handed it to him. As he looked it over, I studied him. He was also good-looking, but not in the same way Ethan was. With his shaggy brown hair that sort of fell in his eyes, he wasn't so clean-cut. He wore jeans and a plain green T-shirt with brown sandals, and he looked like he had probably gotten out of bed, gotten dressed and left his house in a matter of minutes. But not in a bad way. Not like one of those greasy, “I'm so cool that I don't have to shower” type of guys. He just seemed laid-back. And
nice
.

He looked up at me. “We have second period together,” he said. He seemed happy about that. I was, too. It would be nice to know someone.

About that time, the bell rang. As the students started getting up and filing toward the door, he turned to me. “Hey, I didn't even get your name,” he said.

“It's Rain,” I said.

“Rain? That's a great name. Different. I'm Aiden,” he said.

“Aiden. That's a great name, too,” I said with a smile. “Guess I'll see ya second period.”

“Sounds good,” he said. “See ya then.”

I focused on getting to my first period class – Geometry. I was kind of glad to start the day with math. I liked math, even though my grade had kind of fallen apart at the end of last year. Sometimes remembering all the formulas could be tedious and even seem pointless, but I liked the fact that math made sense. There was one answer to each problem. As long as you followed the right steps and did each part carefully, you could get that one answer. Luckily, Mr. Wright's classroom was not far from the gym and I found my way back to it easily.

Mr. Wright was writing on the board as we walked in the room. He was a short, slightly stocky man wearing khaki pants with a plaid shirt tucked in to those pants. I could see that he was balding on the top and his glasses were way too big for his face. After a quick glance around the room, I chose a seat right in the middle. I figured that was a safe spot – I wasn't right up front, looking like an overachiever, but I wasn't in the back, looking like a slacker. On one side of me sat a small, frail girl with red hair. Her red hair was not the same color as mine – mine was more of a dark red that actually looked brown most of the time with a slight red tint. This girl's red hair was almost orange. She wore a long skirt and a button-down shirt and seemed to be so absorbed in the book she was reading that she wasn't even aware of anything else. On the other side of me was a pretty blonde girl wearing a slightly-too-short skirt and a tight V-neck shirt. She was looking in her compact mirror as she touched up her mascara.

The blonde girl looked over at me and smiled. “You're new, right?” she asked, batting those freshly-covered eyelashes.

“Yeah,” I answered. “I'm Rain.”

“Whoa, seriously? Your name is Rain? Like, the weather?” she asked. I should have been slightly insulted by her response, but somehow, it didn't feel like she was mocking me. She seemed too ditzy to be mocking, if that makes sense.

“Yes, like the weather. If that helps you,” I said, raising my eyebrows.
H
old off on the attitude
, I thought to myself.
Don't make an enemy right away.

She didn't seem to pick up on my sarcasm. “That's so weird. But cool! I'm Anna,” she said with a smile.

“Nice to meet you, Anna,” I said, smiling back. With that, the final bell rang, telling students that they had to be in class. Mr. Wright turned to all of us.

“Welcome to Geometry. I am going to pass out a note card to each of you. If you look at the board you will see I have listed name, address, etcetera. I want you to put your information on these cards so that I will have the basics for each of you. This will be a pretty informal day, since it's Friday and you only have a half day anyway. We will just kind of go over the course and what's expected out of you, as well as get our textbooks. Sound good?” Without replying, everyone took their note cards and started writing out the information.

I was surprised at how fast the hour went. We got our textbooks and discussed the chapters we would be covering, as well as what he expected out of our work and behavior. Before I knew it, the bell was ringing to go to second period. As I gathered my things, Anna turned toward me. I could tell she was waiting for me to walk out of the room.

“So what class do you have now?” she asked, falling into step beside me as we walked out the door.

“Um, American Literature,” I said, looking at my schedule to see where to go.

“Oh, so you're a junior,” she said, nodding. “I took that last year.”

“You're a senior?” I asked, slightly absentmindedly. I was trying to remember where I was supposed to go.

“Yeah, finally!” she said, tossing her long blond hair. “So, you probably haven't really met anyone yet, huh?”

“Um, no, not really. Just a couple people,” I said, still looking for Mrs. White's class.

“Do you have plans after school? Me and some of my friends are going to drive over to Evanston to get some lunch and just hang out, maybe go to the mall for a while. If you want, you could ride with me. I have plenty of room,” she said.

Just then we arrived in front of my classroom. I stopped and turned my attention toward her. “Oh, thanks, I would, but I can't. I have to walk my little brother home after school.”

“I could give you guys both a ride, and then we could leave from there,” she said, smiling. “Just come. It should be fun.”

I looked at her closely. It was odd that she was asking me to go when she barely knew me, let alone offering me and my brother a ride home. She didn't look like the type of girl to reach out to strange new girls – particularly ones that looked as plain as I did. But, maybe she was just nice. Just trying to help out a new girl. I thought about her offer. Mom would actually be home this afternoon, so I wouldn't have to watch Tyler. That was definitely not something that happened often, especially not on Fridays. So, I smiled back at her. “Okay, if you're sure you don't care to give my brother a ride home. He's only seven; I just don't want him to walk alone.”

“Sure, no problem!” she said excitedly. “Meet me at the front door right after school. We will all wait there for you. I'm so glad you're coming!”

“Me too,” I said, and I actually meant it. It was weird that she was so anxious for me to go, when she knew nothing more than my name and that I was a junior, but it would be nice to meet some people. I wasn't sure that we had a lot in common, but she seemed sweet, anyway. I walked into Mrs. White's class with a smile on my face.