Holly Hearts Hollywood (10 page)

“Hey, I’ve had fun tonight, but Lacey wants to leave at twelve-thirty,” I said.

Keller looked pretty disappointed. “Oh no, don’t go.” He grabbed my arm and held it tightly. “I like having you around.”

My heart flip-flopped. “I like being around, but I need to go.”

Keller grabbed my other arm and fingered the fabric of my skirt. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I have to get Lacey. It’s my job,” I said feebly, even though I wanted him grab me and rip the front of my dress open like I was a woman on the cover of a sexy romance novel.

The next problem arose quickly: I couldn’t find Lacey.

I checked the backyard, the hot tub, the living room, the kitchen, the garage, the laundry room, and even the pantry. I was considering filing a missing persons report when I saw Serena again.

“Where have you been?” I’d barely seen her all night.

“I saw you were
busy
.” Serena winked.

“We’ll talk about it later,” I said breathlessly. “Have you seen Lacey?”

“Yeah, I saw her heading up the stairs earlier with someone.”

“She
what?
” I ran up the stairs in a panic. The last thing an up-and-coming performer needs is to be photographed half-naked with a cocktail waiter. But as it turned out, Mr. Salazar’s house is a freaking maze. I felt like I was in the final task of
The Goblet of Fire
, for heaven’s sake.

Once, when I was eleven, my grandpa forced me to watch a cow give birth because he thought it’d be a good life experience. It was probably the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen, and I’ll never be able to un-see it. I thought
that
was going to be the most traumatizing experience of my life, until I walked into Mr. Salazar’s bedroom.

I could easily spot Lacey’s shimmering blonde hair among the tangled limbs on the bed. Her dress was pulled down, revealing her strapless, lace-trimmed bra. She gets to wear dainty, adorable bras, and I need something industrial-sized. Her lip-gloss was smeared across her face. Her legs were wrapped around some guy’s naked waist. I thought about turning around and leaving Lacey and her…
friend
to it, but I couldn’t risk someone else walking in on them.

So I coughed, but they couldn’t hear me over their sucking lips. I swear, I could hear them exchanging saliva and groaning. It was horrifying.

“Um, Lacey? We need to go.” And then the guy’s head turned, and I noticed his metallic, tight-fitting jeans. I felt like vomiting.

Grayson. Grayson Frost.
AGAIN.

AND I SAW HIS BUTT.
Oh my God.
OH MY GOD.

Lacey glared at me from her position (gag) under Grayson. “What are you doing?” she demanded.

“I’m sorry, but we have to go! You have appointments early tomorrow. You told me to get you at twelve-thirty.”

“Ugh, fine.”

Grayson rolled off her, and I managed to see Lacey adjust her underwear before I looked away. Is it pathetic that I was relieved she actually wore underwear? I looked toward Grayson, and I was filled with dread. I didn’t think I could handle his taunts. I was so afraid of him turning around and a horrible disgust filling his eyes. But no. He pulled his pants on and a blush crept over his cheeks. Seriously. The boy who gave me hell in school was
blushing
. The Grayson Frost I remembered was incapable of feeling shame.

“Lace, who’s this?”

“Oh, it’s just Holly, my assistant,” she said. I didn’t even bother correcting her. What’s the point, anyway? She’s either stupid or deliberately ignoring me when I correct her.

Grayson smiled one of those infuriating smiles I remember all too well from school.

“Hey, nice to meet you.” He didn’t recognize me! I don’t know why I expected anything different. Why should he? I’m no one and always will be. Maybe if I’d burst into tears, he would’ve recognized me. After giving Grayson another sloppy kiss and promising to “pick up where they left off” soon, Lacey wobbled over on unsteady legs.

“Are you ready?” she asked with a dramatic eye roll. Later, when we finally made it to the limo, I realized I couldn’t help myself. I had to say something.

“Lacey, do you think it was a good idea to be doing…
that
with Grayson Frost?”

“What? Are you my publicist now?” It was a strange question. It seemed more like something a mother would ask their daughter rather than a publicist to her client.

“No! I’m…trying to help.”

We lapsed into an uncomfortable silence, and I watched the palm trees roll by.

“Not that I
need
your advice or anything, but why do you think it was a bad idea?” She blurted.

“Being with Grayson isn’t a bad idea. But having sex with him on Mr. Salazar’s bed is.”

“We didn’t have sex. Not yet, anyways.”

Well…that’s a relief, I guess.

“And who cares if I do have sex with him? I’ll have sex with whoever I want, as long as he has a condom of course.”

“Oh, okay,” I said, suddenly feeling ashamed of myself. Lacey was right, of course. Her choices are her choices. Well at least she has people to make sexual choices with, unlike myself.

“Besides, who do you think you are, my mother?”

I most definitely do not think I’m Kimberly. I don’t wear Juicy Couture, tan until my skin is orange, and bleach my hair into a frazzled mess.

“No, I’m not trying to be your mom. I guess I’m just trying to be your friend.”

Lacey wrinkled her perfectly plucked eyebrows at me. “My friend? Why would you want to be my friend? I can be a bitch.”

“Well, admitting it is the first step.” Lacey glared at me, and I quickly continued. “I was trying to be helpful, okay?”

“Well, I don’t need your help.” She paused for a moment. “But thanks anyway.”

Dare I say it, but are we actually making progress?

THINGS TO DO:

1.
Figure out if what I’m doing with Keller is actually flirting or a step away from a psychotic breakdown.

2.
Stop being so negative.

3.
Stop lying!

4.
Continue striving to be more mature, confident, and honest…Who am I kidding?

February 25
^th
, 10:15am—Pink Palm Motel

Keller called me.
KELLER WILCOX CALLED ME!
I don’t even know how he got my number. He probably abused his position as an intern and found it in some file. When I answered the phone, I definitely didn’t expect to hear his voice.

“Hey, Holly,” he said.

I nearly dropped the phone into my bowl of Frosted Flakes. “Keller?”

I looked up from my newly-poured cereal at my family. Ivy was pasting crystals to her smartphone, and my mom was whispering to a Chia Pet.

“Can you talk?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said, abandoning my cereal in the sink before dashing out to the parking lot for privacy.

“I had a fun time with you at the party.”

“Yeah, me too,” I said nervously. I’ve never had a boy call me before, and I didn’t know what to do. Guys aren’t anything like girls. I can’t talk to them the same way I’d talk to Meredith or Amanda. If it were my friends on the phone, I would’ve told them all about Grayson, his bare ass, and how I’m terrified that he’s dating Lacey now. If he’s dating Lacey, that means he’ll be around a lot more. I couldn’t talk to Keller about another guy; I read in
Cosmo
that guys don’t want girls to talk to them about other boys. Then again,
Cosmo
recommends wearing high heels during sex to “spice things up,” and that sounds like an eye patch waiting to happen.

“So,” Keller said slowly, “I know it’s kind of last-minute, but are you busy this afternoon?”

I went into full cardiac arrest. Was he asking me out? I was supposed to go to the latest Disney-Pixar movie with Serena, but I had no qualms about canceling. I was sure she’d understand.

“I’m not doing anything,” I squeaked. “Totally free.” I sounded like a pre-pubescent boy.

“Well, do you want to hang out with me?”

I nearly cried. A symphony started playing in my mind. I’ve never been asked out on a date. Which makes sense. I mean, look at me. My skin looks like something Mt. Vesuvius laid waste to, and I’ll probably need a walker by the time I’m thirty-five to support my swollen cankles. Which begs the question: why is Keller interested in me in the first place? He’s so attractive and charming; he could easily get a Lacey of his own.

“Are you still there?” Keller asked nervously. “Did I scare you away?”

“No, no!” I said too loudly. “I’m sorry, I zoned out. Yes, I’d love to go out with you.” That was the pinnacle of understatements. Keller gave me a time and an address. Apparently it’s a surprise date! I can’t wait, and I usually hate surprises. Oh, wait, Serena’s here! This calls for an emergency fashion consultation.

Later, 2:30pm—In Serena’s Car

I’ve never worn so much expensive clothing in my life. I’m wearing Miu Miu platforms, which don’t even sound like a real thing, and a Kate Spade sundress. Serena did my makeup this time, thank God, and managed to cover up most of my volcanic acne. That girl is a real-life fairy godmother.

I’m so nervous. Every single one of my pores is sweating. I’ve had a hundred crushes in my short life, but none of them ever reciprocated my feelings. Does this mean Keller is my boyfriend now?

Serena’s been talking to me nonstop since I got in the car. She’s giving me advice about kissing and conversation topics, which is sweet and all, but she’s failed to notice I’m writing in my journal. How can I trust her with guy advice if she doesn’t even notice I’m not paying attention? I occasionally say “good idea” or “I didn’t know that” to make her feel less lonely. Does this make me a bad friend? Oh my God, I’m a bad friend. I shouldn’t be writing in here while my friend is driving me to a date. I’m horrible.

I didn’t tell my mom about the date or Keller at all. I love my mom, but sometimes she gets carried away. When I first got interested in horseback riding, Mom went out and bought fifty books about horses and rented
The Man from Snowy River
and
Wild Hearts Can’t be Broken,
which aren’t the most cheerful horse movies in existence. In eighth grade, when my horse, Moonbeam, got spooked and threw me, scenes from those movies flashed before my eyes.

I’m so curious about the date! I don’t understand why Keller would make it a surprise. I suppose he’s trying to be romantic. Wait, what’s that smell? It’s really familiar.

OH MY GOD.

Later, 3:00pm—Bathroom at Sunset Valley Stables

I’m
MORTIFIED.
I’m seriously embarrassed beyond repair. Keller will definitely mock me until the day I die. I shouldn’t be allowed outside.

Turns out, the smell was familiar because I used to live on a farm. It was the smell of a stable. For a moment, I got excited about Keller planning a surprise horseback riding date, but then I realized I’m wearing thousand-dollar platforms and a designer dress to the
stables.
I also noticed he wasn’t alone. A man and woman stood behind Keller, hand in hand. The man even had silver hair like Keller, and I realized it wasn’t a date. I was invited to join a family outing.

“Just go!” Serena insisted. “He’ll be way more upset if you don’t show up.”

I could see Keller walking toward the car. His silver hair glinted in the sunlight, and his eyes were narrowed with curiosity. A girl about Ivy’s age looked at her cellphone and snapped her gum impatiently.

“I’m going to look so
stupid
!” I protested, even though Serena was shoving her high-heeled foot against my hip in an effort to get me out of the car.

“Holly, is that you?” Keller asked, peering at me curiously. I was slathered in lip gloss, Serena’s feet were in my face, and I was practically hanging upside down out of her BMW. “Are you wearing a dress?”

My heart almost fell out of my butt. “I gotta go to the bathroom real quick,” I sputtered, and I speed-walked over to the restroom where I’ve now been for the past ten minutes. I can’t go out there! I’m horribly overdressed. This is not your garden-variety overdressed situation, like wearing an evening dress to a semi-formal event. I’ve completely ruined our first date. Oh, what am I saying? This isn’t even a date! He probably invited me so I could meet his nice, normal family, and I’m dressed like I’m going to a nightclub. All he’s ever going to remember is how I messed up his nice surprise, and there go all possibilities of a relationship. He’ll never want to take me out in public when I mess things up so badly. I’m going to go tell him I’m leaving.

THINGS TO DO:

1.
Figure out escape plan.

2.
Learn to drive so I can get myself away from bad situations like this.

3.
  Go to the bookstore and buy all books they have on relationships. Obviously, I need help.

Later, 6:45pm—Pink Palm Motel

Well, what a plot twist. When I finally left the bathroom, reeking of shame, Keller was waiting outside with a pair of riding boots in his hands. His family was standing beside a couple of horses, and they looked like a Ralph Lauren ad. When Mom, Ivy, and I stand next to each other, we look like a freak show exhibit.

“I thought you might need these,” he said with a smile.

My heart fluttered. “Thanks,” I said, my cheeks turning red. “I’m sorry I wore this stupid outfit, I didn’t know.”

Keller shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize. I should’ve warned you.”

“Mom, Dad,” he said to two adults who looked way too young to have a seventeen-year-old son, “this is Holly.”

Keller’s mom gave me a blindingly white smile. “Holly, so nice to meet you!”