Hope Over Fear (Over #1) (10 page)

“The Little Things” by Colbie Caillat

AFTER TAKING A quick shower and doing a normal amount of primping (no extra time spent, I swear), I jump into my Bug and drive to the clinic. It’s a chilly day, but the sun is shining brightly, warming up the car and my skin. My first travel nursing assignment took me to Fairbanks, Alaska, so I no longer take this beautiful weather for granted. This Louisiana girl was not made to live in darkness for months at a time. The darkness wasn’t the worst of it; I sucked ass at driving in the snow and death by car accident was inevitable if I extended my contract. You can take the girl out of the South, but you can’t take the South out of the girl.

As I open the door and rush into the clinic, I almost run directly into Caroline. I grab both her arms to steady her and keep her from falling down.

“Whoa, Sara! You need to use your blinker, girl!”

“I’m so sorry, Caroline! I’m zoned out today. It’s good to see you.”

“I’m happy to see you, too. Let’s go in my office for a minute. I want to talk to you about Abigail.”

“Oh, did I do something wrong? I felt the meeting went well …”

“Of course, honey. You did perfect. I just wanted to let you know that Abigail called yesterday afternoon with a couple of questions, and I talked with her. She spoke very highly of you. I know you’ve only met with her one time, but you made an impression.” Caroline squeezes my arm affectionately as she leads me into her office.

“Oh, thank goodness. I’m glad Abigail felt comfortable with me. She didn’t share much personal information, but I got the feeling that she doesn’t have much support from family or friends.”

“You’re exactly right. Abigail can be a bit guarded, so I want to give you a little insight into what her life has been like. I think it will help to guide your approach with her. All of her life, it’s only been her and her mother. Her mother, Cindy, got pregnant very young, and she was all alone. Her boyfriend left, never to be heard from again, and her parents disowned her. She struggled to make ends meet and take care of a baby when she was just a child herself. Cindy eventually turned to alcohol and drugs when Abigail was very young. Abigail probably has no recollection of her mother before the substance abuse. We have attempted to help Cindy with her addictions, but unfortunately, it’s never stuck. Abigail is a resilient child, and has been the adult in that household for many years. That girl has found her mother passed out drunk on the bathroom floor more times than I care to think about. I met Abigail when she was about thirteen years old through a community outreach program I was volunteering with, and I’ve kept in touch over the years. This girl means a great deal to me. No child should have to go through the things that Abigail has endured.”

It’s clear how deeply Caroline cares for Abigail. I’m unsure of the exact circumstances that brought them together, but I’m thankful it happened. It’s a shame that Abigail doesn’t receive what she needs from her mother, but I know Caroline will do everything in her power to help this girl.

“She fell in love with a boy from Northern U who said all the right things. I warned her about dating a college boy when she was still in high school. But she was blinded by his attention and couldn’t see what was happening. I wish to God I was wrong about the boy, but he broke her heart and left her pregnant. She hasn’t heard one word from him since she told him she was pregnant. Abigail expects the people in her life to abandon her. Unfortunately, it’s all she knows.”

“That’s more disappointment than anyone should have to withstand at seventeen years old,” I say. It’s so disheartening that Abigail has suffered these hardships at such a young age. Her story resonates with me. Single mothers raised us both, but that’s where the similarity ends. My mother centered her life around her child, and Cindy left Abigail to fend for herself while she drowned in drugs and alcohol.

“I know. I try to keep Abigail’s spirits lifted and remind her about the bright future that’s ahead of her. When she’s been let down all of her life, though, it’s damn near impossible for her to believe it. That girl is smart as a whip. She’s managed honor roll throughout high school in a terrible environment, and her standardized test scores are through the roof. I refuse to let her give up.”

“Thank you for sharing her story with me. She’s an extraordinary young woman. I’m glad she chose to look into open adoption. I believe Abigail will find solace in being a part of her child’s life.”

“I completely agree, Sara. I’m looking forward to working together with you on this case. I hope you understand how much faith I have in you. I wouldn’t let just anyone work with Abigail. Like I said, I care for her deeply, and no one is better suited to her needs than you.” Caroline gives me a reassuring smile. A warm flush runs over me as I accept her praise. Caroline’s respect means more than I can say.

“I appreciate the vote of confidence, Caroline. I won’t let you down.”

Caroline and I make small talk as we slowly move out of her office and into common area. Celia is sitting at the middle table inhaling the largest cinnamon roll that I’ve ever seen. It’s the kind of cinnamon roll that would give me two dimples of ass cellulite just for taking a whiff of it. Damn! She’s got the guy and the fast metabolism. Life is officially unfair.

“Caroline! Sara! Good morning, my lovelies. I brought fruit for the health nuts and donuts for the cheaters like me. Come and get it!”

And she’s thoughtful, too, which means I can’t hate her. I’m still a teensy bit envious, though. I punish myself for my jealous thoughts with a donut. Ass dimples are an appropriate punishment for my jealousy, right?

“I’ll take my donut to go, Celia. I’m going to be down the street working on the downtown mural this morning. You guys feel free to check it out later. It looks fantastic; the clients have really outdone themselves this time!” Caroline beams with pride and her enthusiasm is contagious. I’m surrounded by people who are passionate about their work, and I love it. Caroline is out the door with her donut before I have a chance to tell her goodbye.

“Thanks for the donut. My big butt is especially appreciative,” I giggle.

“Oh, please. I can tell with one look that you are all muscle, girl. I’d kill for your ass!”

“Well, I would kill for your thin frame. There is way too much thickness going on over here,” I explain as I wave my hands over my stomach and thighs.

“It’s official—women always want what they don’t have!” Celia shakes her head and laughs.

“Now, that’s the truth! So what’s going on this morning? How can I help?”

“Well, I have a couple of individual therapy sessions, so I’ll be busy with that. Adam just started an STD awareness class that you could observe. You may have to lead one of them in the future, so that’s probably a good idea. We have the class every Saturday morning, and the Northern U freshman students have to attend one of the classes as part of their orientation. Ooh, you need to sit in the back and heckle him. He claims no one can fluster him, but I bet you’d give him a run for his money.”

“Oh, he’d appreciate that, I’m sure. I’m trying to stay on his good side since I pretty much called him a skank my first day here. Not the best way to make friends at a new job, if you know what I mean.”

“He’s got a good sense of humor. Don’t spend one minute worrying about that.”

“How long have y’all been together?”

“Well, we … huh? What are you talking about?” Celia’s head is tilted to the side, and she is squinting her eyes at me like she’s trying to figure me out.

“You and Adam, I mean. How long have y’all been a couple?”

“Adam and I? A couple?” Celia throws her head back and bursts into laughter. Now I’m the one trying to figure her out.

“What’s so funny?”

“I am
not
seeing Adam. We are very good friends, and we’re next-door neighbors. That’s the only thing going on between us. What gave you that idea?”

Huh?

But I thought …

So you mean …

It takes me a long moment to process her words, and then another moment to sufficiently cover up my excitement … I mean … surprise.

“Sorry, I completely misunderstood the situation. The two of you just seem so close, and then I heard y’all making plans last night. I just assumed …”

“We are close, that’s true. Adam’s a great friend. He’s got a lot of responsibility on his shoulders, and I help him out sometimes. That’s what you heard us talking about. I actually can’t remember the last time Adam has dated anyone.” Celia winks at me knowingly.

Well, shit, that definitely changes things.

I slink into the classroom and try my hardest to go unnoticed as I take a seat in a chair in the back row.

“Ah, Sara, I’m glad you decided to stop by my presentation today. Did you really think I would let you get away with hiding out in the back?” Adam winks at me while the entire class turns around to gawk at the newcomer. “Ladies and gentlemen, Sara is a volunteer here at the clinic, and she has some invaluable insight into the importance of STD prevention. Sara, care to share with the class?”

“Sure thing, Adam, there’s nothing I’d rather do more,” I quip sarcastically as I make my way to the front of the class.

“Like Adam said, my name is Sara. I’m a new volunteer here at the clinic, and I’m also a labor and delivery nurse at Providence Memorial. As you can imagine, I see my fair share of unplanned pregnancies. It can be a very scary time for someone who isn’t ready to be a parent, so I can’t stress enough the importance of safe sex.”

“Sara, I’m sure the hospital treats many patients who have contracted sexually-transmitted diseases.” I nod at Adam as he continues, “What pearls of wisdom can you impart on the class from your experiences at the hospital?”

“When talking about STDs, I want you to remember this one statement. Just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there.” I give this a minute to soak in before continuing. “People with STDs don’t look a certain way. Chlamydia can be disguised in a very pretty package. It would be easy if we could spot the danger, but you can’t. A large percentage of people with STDs don’t even realize they have one. It’s important to protect yourself every time you are engaging in any sexual activity.”

One of the boys in the back row raises his hand, smirk already present on his face. “When I’m messing around with a girl, it’s embarrassing to just start talking about that junk. It breaks up my flow.”

The class is snickering, and I can tell ‘cool boy in the back of the class’ thinks he just scored points for being the class clown. “First of all, if you can’t talk about condoms with your partner, you probably shouldn’t be having sex with her. Second of all, what conversation would be less embarrassing: ‘Do you have a condom?’ or ‘I may have given you syphilis.’ I know what conversation I’d rather have.”

The class is laughing and cool boy shakes his head and puts his hands up in a “you win” gesture. I take a seat in a chair off to the side of Adam and let him take the lead again. He periodically engages me in the lesson, and I find that we work well together. We are aware of each other’s cues, and we have a good back and forth. I’m impressed with the casual atmosphere he creates and how it makes the students more at ease about asking questions and sharing their concerns. Focusing on the lesson has distracted my mind for a while, but I’m now acutely aware of how sexy Adam looks, yet again. He makes a pair of worn jeans, black boots, and a black henley look runway ready. I feel my nerves creeping up, and I do my best to swallow them.

As the students file out of the room, I notice Adam grinning at me and nodding his head smugly.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I believe I’ve found my partner in crime for these classes. We make a great team, don’t ya think?” Adam comes closer and bumps me with his shoulder, and I savor the proximity. He’s not wearing cologne, but he has a distinct, delicious smell—outdoors and just male. The man is completely edible.

“Yeah, we do make a pretty great team. Thanks for letting me jump right in.”

“No need to thank me. Now that I know you’re good at this, I’m going to do my best to make you my permanent co-instructor. The other volunteers get all squeamish talking about this stuff. From now on, it’s you, me, and the pictures!” Adam holds up a picture of … well, let’s just say it’s very disturbing.

I scrunch up my nose and laugh. “Adam, please, put the picture down. It’s very unbecoming!”

“That’s the point!”

I shake my head and follow Adam out of the classroom. I try to ignore the view, but who am I kidding? There’s no denying he’s got a fine ass. I’m so enthralled with Adam’s backside that I don’t realize that he’s looked back to ask me a question. Oh yeah, he just caught me checking him out. The smirk on his face is all the evidence I need.

“I’m sorry, what?” I feel the heat rushing over my face. Because of my coloring, I can never hide my embarrassment. My cheeks always give me away.

“I was just saying that it looks like it’s going to be just the two of us this morning. Caroline and Celia are both busy today.” I’m relieved that Adam seems to be letting me off the hook. I’m humiliated enough without him bringing attention to my ogling.