How to Sew a Button: And Other Nifty Things Your Grandmother Knew (24 page)

Step 1:
Be home when your sweetie returns from work, if you can help it. If you must step out, leave a kind note, stating where you’ve gone, when you expect to return, and how much you love him or her. For example, “Ran to the market. Be back in ten minutes. Love, me.”

Step 2:
Greet your mate at the door with a smile and kiss. Knowing that you make another person happy simply by showing up is enough to cheer anyone, even after the worst of days.

Step 3:
Take his or her coat and bag and stow them away. It’s not about waiting on your partner; it’s just an easy way to give comfort. You are literally unburdening your honey.

Step 4:
Listen and share. Sometimes all anyone needs is to feel heard and understood.

Step 5:
Show your love. Small gestures, like a playful caress, a squeeze of the shoulder, or a hand on the knee, often mean more than large overtures, like a fancy dinner or a schmancy present.
There is a difference between knowing that someone cares for you and actually physically feeling it over and over again.

• Share this page with your mate. Giving comfort to your partner is most definitely a two-way street.
  

• Don’t allow your evening to devolve into a complain-a-thon. If you’ve both got a lot to unload, set a time (and time limit) to do it and then be done.
  

• When all else fails, pour a glass of wine and make out. Hey, don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.
  

Saving
With the future uncertain, you’ll feel much better with money in your pocket than, say, a fancy new bag on your arm
.

Step 1:
Track your spending. Keep a pencil and notepad with you at all times. For three months, write down where every single penny goes, whether it’s for your rent or a pack of gum. That sounds like a long time, but it’s the only way to get an accurate read. Besides, you’ll get in the habit in no time.

Step 2:
Examine your list. Divide your expenses into three major categories: (1) fixed expenses, or recurring expenses like rent, phone, utilities, etc.; (2) variable expenses, or essentials that vary in
price, like food, travel, and medical bills; and (3) optional expenses, like entertainment, clothes, and beauty buys. Then add up the totals in each, and multiply those tallies by four to find your projected yearly expenditures. Next, throw onto the list any annual layouts that may not be represented in your quarter-year sample, including any insurance payments, memberships, seasonal splurges (lift tickets, Christmas presents, annual vacation, subscriptions). Calculate your grand total. Yell ai-ooooga! And then put your eyeballs back in your head.

Step 3:
Figure out your annual income. Add to your salary any sources of dough you can definitely count on, including bonus pay or dividends. Now compare your income to your cash outlay from step 2. Are you earning more than you’re spending? If so, wahoo! Are you spending more than you’re earning? Uh-oh, that’s trouble.

Step 4:
Grow your money. Even if you’re in the black, there are probably places where you can find extra savings. (Don’t think of it as skimping. Think of it as paying yourself first, because that’s exactly what you’re doing.) Start by examining your optional expenses, and see where you can find more cash. Do you really need new shoes, or can you just shine up your old ones? Must you buy a $9 sandwich every day at work, or can you pack a lunch? Do you need to take those yoga classes at that fancy studio for $14 a pop or could you pick up a DVD and do them at home sometimes? Once you identify where you can save, readjust your monthly allowances and stick to them.

Step 5:
Know your goals. It’s easier to live within your budget if you know what you’re saving for. Jot down the financial goals you’d like to achieve in the next year and in the next five years. Whenever you feel the urge to splurge, read your goals once more to help you stay focused.

• Try to put at least 10 percent of your pretax income into your just-for-emergencies savings account and another 10 percent into a retirement fund.
  

• Start with small, realistic cuts and, if you can swing more, make them. That way, you’ll never be caught sitting in the dark wondering, “How did I convince myself that electricity was a luxury?”
  

• Until you have three to six months of savings stashed, refrain from major splurging. Once you have your nest egg, you can afford the occasional indulgence, guilt-free, because you’ve saved for it.
  

Step 1:
Leave your plastic at home. If you slip your credit card in a desk drawer, rather than your wallet, you’ll be far less likely to splurge on impulse buys. Keeping it in a safe place will protect you should temptation strike.

Step 2:
Stash your cash. Hit your ATM once a week, withdraw your allotted allowance, and don’t tap it again until the following week. You’ll consider your purchases much more carefully when you literally have to part with the money in your hand, and you’ll be more mindful of your budget when you actually see your dollars dwindle. If you burn through your allowance for the week, that’s it, stop spending.

Step 3:
Plan ahead. Evaluate and adjust your budget in order to save for bigger purchases. Even after you’ve found a way to stockpile the necessary dough, carefully consider if you need the item. Write down your dream purchase, along with its price, and the pros and cons of making the buy. Are those shoes worth giving up your weekly bowling night with the girls? Which will make you happier in the long run? Do you really need a new cell phone, or does your old one work just fine? If, upon closer inspection, you can afford what you want and you need it, buy it in cash and enjoy it, stress-free!

• Prioritize your life. Remember, you won’t find lasting happiness in any store. If you feel empty, stop buying crap you don’t need, and make friends, volunteer or find love. All are much more valuable than anything you can charge.
  

• For bigger-ticket items, say $30 or more, install a waiting period. That way, you’ll think more carefully about what you buy.
  

• Just say no to plastic. Keep one or two low-interest, zero-fee cards, and pay them off monthly, so you can establish good credit, which is helpful when you’d like to get a home or car loan. Every other promotional offer that lands in your mailbox? Cut it up.
  

Step 1:
Save all your receipts for every single financial transaction you make, including deposits, ATM withdrawals, and purchases via debit, cash, or check. File them weekly in a designated folder or drawer.