How to Write a Brilliant Novel: The Easy Step-By-Step Method of Crafting a Powerful Story (Go! Write Something Brilliant) (18 page)

I read a book review where the reviewer referred to
changing POV
as head hopping. That's not head hopping. There’s a difference between the two.

Changing POV for a new scene is a legitimate and necessary story too.l You changePOV by simply inserting a substantial line break, or perhaps asterisks, between the two POVs. Head hopping—telling the reader how two people in the same scene both feel—is not a legitimate story tool. It jerks the reader’s emotions back and forth. Who do I feel for in the previous scene? Tom, who wants to be free of his burdens, or Rachel who feels left out and alone?

Let's rewrite the scene from Tom's POV:

Tom stood to watch the boats docking in the moor. The wind pressed the hem of his shirt against his abdomen as he raised his hand to shield his eyes from the sun.

How could he be like one of the boats, free and out on the open sea? His mouth watered at the idea. His heart beat as if he'd actually cut and run.

"Tom, what you are doing? Let's go."

Tom looked back at Rachel. She stood by the car, arms crossed, frown on her face. She was mad, he guessed, but for the moment, he didn't care.

See the difference? We see the world and Rachel, only from Tom's POV. The reader cannot know anything Tom does not. To show conflict with Rachel, I added dialogue. She sounds impatient, doesn't she?

When Tom looks around, we "read" her through his eyes. We get the idea all is not well between them. We are sympathetic toward Tom. Our emotions are with him until, of course, we change to Rachel's POV and we see her side of the story.

You can show your characters’ feelings and emotions in the story narrative, but another way is in dialogue followed by an action tag. This is an effective way to "show" the scene.

"Tom, what are you doing? Let's go." Rachel hammered the hood of the car with her fist.

Oh, now we really see her 'tude. So does Tom. We understand what he knows about Rachel.

Omniscient POV
is the “God voice.” It’s when the author is narrating the story from overhead, dipping into the minds of all the characters at once. However, sometimes it slips into a third person story. When it does, it’s called "author intrusion." This means the author has introduced facts and ideas the POV character does not know. The classic omniscient infraction is “little did he know . . . ”

That phrase makes me laugh. Or, the author might pen, "Tomorrow, Rachel would wonder why she ever let Tom talk her into driving to the river."

In
First person POV
the story is told through the "I" of the protagonist. Usually there is only one POV character in first person books because the voice and sound is so unique. But you can tell a story with multiple POV characters if the voices are distinct enough.

I (Rachel) had two first person POVs in
Diva NashVegas.
When I wrote the hero, Scott’s, dialogue, I tried really hard to make him sound like a dude, very distinct from my heroine, Aubrey.

A clear POV character in each scene is the key to building a strong story with solid writing. You can “head hop” if you want and tell us what everyone including the grocery store clerk is feeling or thinking, but it’s confusing to the reader, and sign of lazy writing. Head hopping is also different from the slide into different POVs many romance writers use.

They make an easy transition between POVs, but then establish themselves firmly in one POV at a time).

When I talked with editors at Thomas Nelson, I learned they like third–person POV because of the versatility it provides. They felt that sometimes a first-person POV can become claustrophobic.

I didn't understand what they meant by “claustrophobic” until I read a first-person book where the story was so close to the protagonist, I felt locked in. I wanted to see beyond her, outside of her world. The way to accomplish this in first person POV is to:

1. Add another
   POV
   .
   
2. Add dialogue and scenes with other characters and broaden the
   landscape.
   

Which character should have the POV in a scene? With multiple POV characters, such as in a romance or suspense, how do you know which character should be on stage? Don’t they

both have something at stake? Who do we need to hear from? Who will be telling the story?

Answer : the one with the
most
at stake.
The one whose goals and actions are the most affected by the scene and the conflicts therein. This doesn’t mean the other members of the scene aren’t affected, and in fact, the Action scene
should
lead to a ReAction scene for them.)

Again, write the scene from the POV of the character who would be impacted the most emotionally, or “who has the most to lose.”

There are scenes, of course, where something happens that affects both characters equally. But there are ways to handle that. In
In Sheep’s Clothing
, the prologue is in one character’s POV, describing a scene that happens one-third of the way into the book. When I get to that scene, it is repeated in a different character’s POV. Another way to see how a scene affects two characters is to have the secondary character rehash the scene, from their perspective, in a subsequent scene.

In romance, it’s standard to have an equal amount of time "on stage" for the hero and heroine, though don't feel overly bound by this. Again, make your choice based on who can best tell the story.

In
Love Starts With Elle
, I (Rachel) had a scene where the hero returns to Elle's life. Originally, I told the story in her POV, but in my rewrites, I changed to the hero’s POV. Ultimately, he had the most to lose.

If the story is suspense, perhaps the antagonist will have a few scenes. What are they plotting? How does it advance the story?

If a scene is dragging or feels flat, change the POV. Maybe even introduce a new character. I've done this for my first-person books because the protagonist was too introspective. So, I added a townsperson or a friend the heroine could talk to. It opened up the scene to experience it from a fresh view.

The
bottom
line:
Choose
the
POV
character
that
has
the
most
at
stake
and
who
best moves the action
forward.

• Determine your POV voice
  : Take your main character and put him in a
  scene. Write the scene from the first person
  POV.
  
• Now try the scene from the third person POV.
  
• Which seems stronger to you?
  
• Multiple POV choice
  : Who else is in the scene?
  
• Out of the lineup of cast members, who has the most at stake in the scene?
  
• Who would react strongest to the situation, emotionally or physically?
  
• What POV impacts readers the most?
  

Dialogue isn’t just made up of words—it’s also what is
not
being said. Dialogue is body language and internal monologue and, most of all, it’s conflict. Dialogue more than anything moves a scene, creates emotion, reveals motivations, and produces change in a character. But good dialogue is difficult to write. Here’s a hint:

Good dialogue has four functions:

1. Reveal
   characters
   –
   Dialogue
   reveals
   a
   character,
   but
   only
   as
   much
   as
   they
   want
   to be revealed. It tells the kind of personality they are, how they feel about the people they’re
   conversing
   with,
   where
   they’re
   from,
   their
   education,
   profession,
   etc.
   Your reader
   should
   know
   who
   is
   speaking
   without
   any
   dialogue
   tags,
   i.e.
   he said
   or
   she said.
   
2. Move
   plot
   –
   Dialogue
   moves
   the
   story
   along
   by
   revealing
   information
   and
   raising new questions. If you want a fast scene, insert a lot of dialogue.
   
3. Create Conflict –
   Until you reach the Happily Ever After, dialogue should, even if it’s
   not
   an
   argument,
   deepen
   the
   conflict
   between
   characters,
   create
   inner
   dissonance
   in
   the
   characters,
   and
   distance
   them
   from
   their
   plot
   goals.
   Even
   if
   it
   is
   a
   sweet,
   romantic
   scene,
   dialogue
   will
   make
   the
   characters
   long
   to
   be
   together,
   when
   we know they can’t be. If they’re perfect for each other, but the hero knows they
   can’t
   be
   together,
   then
   that
   will
   create
   inner
   dissonance.
   Conflict
   drives
   a
   story,
   and
   we want lots of it!
   
4. Illuminate
   or
   prepare
   characters
   for
   an
   epiphany
   –
   Dialogue
   is
   a
   great
   device
   to lead the character into a deeper understanding of himself, and eventually lead to his epiphany moment. Tidbits of truth, dropped and revealed along the way, will be gathered like breadcrumbs to help him understand himself, and lead him to finally to his Aha! moment.
   

Conversation is what you and I have every day. Here are some recent snippets from our house:

Mom:
Hi
honey,
how
was
school?

Daughter:
Boring.

Mom:
Did anything exciting happen today?

Daughter:
No. What’s for supper?

Mom:
Hotdogs.

Daughter:
Seriously?

Mom:
Seriously.

Daughter:
I have homework
.

Okay, not riveting stuff.

Most conversation happens about unimportant, everyday things. And it’s boring. Good dialogue only
seems
like real speech. It’s conversation with all the boring stuff deleted, leaving only the essential, the emotional, the most dramatic words.

I want to talk to you.”

“Hi, Maggy. How are you?”

“Don’t ‘how are you’ me! I can’t believe you came back to take away Cole’s land.”

Okay, I admit it. Dialogue is my favorite part of a book. I just love to hear people get into arguments, dodge questions, tell it like it is, and most of all, give each other what for.

Sometimes (and this is the schizophrenic writer side of me) I will even talk out loud as I’m writing dialogue, just to get the inflection. I can also say anything to myself and not get into trouble!)

But what is the secret to sizzling dialogue? What’s the difference between writing conversations that zing and mind-numbing dialogue that causes a book to end face down on the bureau collecting dust?

I think it’s all about adding a little
GUSTO
– the element that contains attitude and energy and courage and everything your character has inside of him.

What do I mean? Let’s take a closer look:

Goals
– Every character has goals for the scene, as well as for the book. And good dialogue reveals those goals—not only by what is being said, but what is
not
being said. Don’t let your characters lay it all on the line. Make them hide their motives to everyone but the reader. In fact, don’t even let them answer the questions they’re asked. Dodge, be evasive, and most of all, never give the expected answer. Not if you don’t want readers to skip lines.

Ask: What must my character accomplish in this chapter?

Ask: What feelings is he going to show? And, what doesn’t my character want others

to know about him?

Useful information
– Dialogueshould give new information to the reader, but
don’t
it in place of backstory.Don’t use dialogue to “inform” the reader:

“Joe, I know that you’re the great uncle of my step-sister, Sally, and that you were having an affair secretly with my dad’s ex-wife who left her and became an alcoholic and eventfully died after going to rehab for liver disease, and that you now got your life together and became a Christian after attending a Billy Graham event in Minneapolis four years ago, after which you dedicated your life to helping orphans in Russia, but could you tell me why my step-sister won’t speak to my little brother, especially since they used to be so close, until he left for the navy two years ago and is in now in Navy Seal training because this was the dream of my father due to my grandfather who was one of the first SEALS in WW II?”