In Name Only (23 page)

“Help him,
David!”

Jane and Kip
joined the group as they watched, helplessly.

David reached out
to his brother, but Liam continued to flail violently on the bed. Involuntary
sounds were escaping from his lips and the bed squeaked and rocked as his head,
arms and legs jerked out of control.  Finally, his body seemed frightfully
still.

David touched
Liam’s shoulder and he roused slightly, but didn’t open his eyes.

“What in the
world just happened, David?”

“I don’t know,
Caroline.  It must be related to his injury.”

“That was
horrible.”

David turned
toward Kip.  “You need to get the doctor.”

“Of course, Mr.
David.”  Kip quickly left the room.

Liam began to
moan.  He opened his eyes.  When he spoke, his words were slurred.  “Don’t
feel. . . well.”

“Lee, you just
had some sort of convulsion or something.”

“W. . .what?”

“You’ve had some
sort of convulsion.”

Liam opened his
mouth to speak, then shook his head.

David leaned
close to Liam.

“I’ve asked Kip
to get Dr. Mayfield, Lee.”

“No doctor.”

“There’s
something wrong and we need to find out what it is.”

“David’s right,
Liam.  We need to get the doctor.  He’ll know what’s wrong with you and how to
fix it.”

Liam closed his
eyes and turned his face away from them.

*  *  *

Later that
morning, Liam stared at his wife’s worried expression.  His head was pounding
and his vision at times was blurred, but most troubling was that he felt
utterly exhausted, as if he had gone for weeks without sleep. Caroline and
David whispered constantly to one another, attempting to appear casual.  He
smiled inwardly.  They were speaking with one another, which in itself was a
miraculous accomplishment.  His wife leaned down and spoke in a calm manner.

“The doctor will
arrive soon, Liam. I’m certain he will give you some medicine to make you
better.”

“Caroline. . .”

“Lee, doctors can
work wonders these days.”

Liam glanced
away.  He wasn’t going to get better.  Perhaps it was his pessimistic nature,
or maybe it was a premonition. However, his head throbbed constantly and the
overwhelming fatigue made it impossible to even lift his head, let alone sit
up. When he spoke, he couldn’t seem to form his words quickly enough. Blurred
vision, muffled hearing, slurred speech and uncontrollable seizures: no, this
was definitely not something that he was going to come out of unscathed. Caroline
was putting forth her best effort to appear strong for him. His eyes became
fixed on her large middle.  Their child.
God, how can I provide for my
child?  For Caroline?  How will she react if I die, especially when she
discovers the truth about me?  But this isn’t just about me anymore.  I must
speak with David and devise a plan for. . .when I’m gone
.

*  *  *

Doctor Mayfield
examined Liam, then straightened. His expression was serious, his tone somber. 
“Mr. O’Donovan, from what your brother tells me, you have experienced a very
bad seizure.”

“And?”

“Sometimes a head
injury will do that, bring on seizures.”

As the doctor
spoke, Liam began convulsing again.  Caroline gasped as she watched her husband
writhing uncontrollably. The wooden floor under his bed creaked.

“Please, please
help him!” she pleaded with the doctor.

“It will end
momentarily, Mrs. O’Donovan.” Dr. Mayfield placed a pillow more firmly under
Liam’s head and a cloth in his mouth.

“Is he in pain,
Doctor?”

“No, no, he won’t
remember this.  And as you witnessed earlier, he’s likely to be exhausted when
this is over.  I’ve placed a cloth in his mouth so he will not bite his
tongue.”

Caroline couldn’t
watch any longer and lowered her gaze.  She followed a ray of sunlight from an
intensely lit patch on the floor all the way to her husband’s bedroom window. 
It was a beautiful spring day, the sky a brilliant blue. She could hear the bed
shaking and muffled grunting sounds coming from her husband, noises which
sounded so foreign to her. 

Then all was
silent.  Slowly, she turned to face her husband who was still on the bed. 
“Thank God.”

“I imagine your
husband will be sleeping for some time. Would you be so kind as to ask your
brother-in-law to come in here?  We must discuss the course of treatment for
your husband.”

“Yes, yes,
certainly.”  Caroline leaned her head out the doorway. Hallie was at the top of
the staircase.  “Hallie?  Would you please tell David to join me in Liam’s
room?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

Within moments,
David rushed into the room.  “What’s wrong, Caroline?”

She bit down on
her lip, then lifted her gaze toward her brother-in-law.  “Another one.”

He gasped, then
lowered his head.

“Mr. O’Donovan,
the fact that your brother has endured two of these in one day, well, it’s not
good.  It is imperative that he be transported to the hospital to be treated
immediately.”

“What sort of
treatment?”

“Bromide is being
used in patients with epilepsy, especially with severe seizures such as this.”

“Epilepsy?”

“Well, it’s a
seizure disorder, but it can be brought about by a head injury and it seems
obvious that is what is happening here, although I cannot know for certain
without performing some tests at the hospital.  As well, he most likely has
some bleeding in the brain.  If that is the case, his prognosis would not be
good.”

Caroline glanced
at Liam.  His eyes were fluttering open.

David responded
to the doctor. “Liam ought to have a say in this decision, Doctor.  And Mrs.
O’Donovan as well.”  They both turned toward Caroline.

“He needs to get
better.”

“Mrs. O’Donovan,
the next few days will give us an idea of whether he will improve. However, if
we do nothing, he will continue to have seizures, perhaps several a day.  He
will not be able to ride a horse or carriage or even conduct business on a
daily basis.”

Moaning caused
them to turn towards Liam’s bed.

“What. . .”

Caroline leaned
down close to him.  “Liam.”

He groaned, then
slowly opened his eyes.

“Mr. O’Donovan,
according to your wife and brother, you’ve already suffered two seizures in
less than eight hours.  If you remain at home, it’s likely that you will
continue to experience these seizures several times a day.  We can treat you
with bromide.”  He paused.  “It is necessary for you to go to the hospital. I
shall return in three hours in order to make arrangements for transporting you
there.”  The doctor picked up his bag.  “You don’t really have much of a
choice, Mr. O’Donovan.” He tipped his hat and left the room.

Caroline sat on
the edge of the bed and picked up Liam’s hand. “You need to go to the
hospital.”

His speech was
again slurred. “Don’t want. . .don’t want. . .to die in. . .hospital.”

“Liam, you
mustn’t say such things.  You’re not going to die.”

“Caroline.” 

“You’re going to
be fine.”

“Must. . .speak
with David.”

“Yes, of course.”

David stood
behind her, his eyes downcast.

Liam glanced at
her.  “Alone.”

“Liam, I want to
stay.”

“Need. . . to
speak with David about. . .business.”

“Very well.”

*  *  *

Liam spoke, his
words continued to be slow and measured.  “I won’t. . .get better.”

“You don’t know
that. You’re going to the hospital.  They’ll make it better.” 

“I. . .am going
to die.”

“Lee. . .”

“Don’t. . .want
to be. . .burden.”

“Lee, that’s
enough.  You’re not going to be a burden to anyone.  Caroline loves you.  She
would do anything for you.”

“Any. . .thing?”

“Yes, damn it,
anything.  So will I.”

For a moment,
neither spoke.  Then Liam cleared his throat.  “You took Caroline to. .
.convent.” 

David stepped
back and his eyes widened.  “What. . .are you talking about?”

“Don’t. . . deny
it.”

“I don’t know
what to say.”

“I know you
did.” 

“Look. . .”
David’s head was lowered and he was avoiding eye contact. Finally, he said, “It
was me.”  He paused a moment, then said, “Lee, I’m sorry.  I will make it up to
you.”

Chapter 23

Caroline paced
the hallway for more than an hour. All of a sudden, she heard David screaming
her name.  She banged open the door to find David leaning over Liam. Her
husband was having another convulsion.

“These – whatever
they’re called – are increasing.  We must get him to the hospital!” David
shouted.

Distracted by her
husband’s uncontrolled shaking on the bed, she stared at him, worry stretched
across her face.  “How do we keep him still in the carriage?”

“I don’t know. 
Perhaps we’ll be fortunate and he won’t have one while we’re transporting him.”

Caroline sat
beside her husband. She stroked his forehead with a cool, wet cloth.  She began
to sob. David touched her shoulder with his hand. “I’m. . .I’m sorry.”

Liam roused.  For
a few moments, he was incoherent, moaning.  His eyes blinked, then opened. He
glanced at his wife, then his brother.  He heaved a defeated sigh, closed his
eyes and turned his head away.

“Lee, we must
transport you to the hospital immediately.”

“Not . . .yet.”

“Liam, please,”
Caroline begged.

“Must rest.”

“Certainly.  I’ll
stay here with you. Then we need to discuss. . .”

“David?”

“Yes?”  David
leaned close to Liam’s face.  Liam mouthed something to his brother, then he
said, “Please.”

David picked up
an envelope from the nightstand and shoved it into his pocket.  “We’ll talk
about this later.”  He quickly left.

Caroline sat down
on the chair next to Liam’s bed; the seat now seemed to bear an imprint of her
body.  He reached his hand for hers.  “You’re. . . sad.” 

“I am sad.”

“Sorry.”

“I just want you
to be. . .”

“The way I. .
.was?”

“I didn’t say
that.  I hate seeing you go through this.”

Caroline lifted
the wet cloth out of the basin and began to tenderly wipe Liam’s face.  Within
a few moments, he began closing his eyes.  “You need to rest, Liam.” 

Without opening
his eyes, he nodded, then he winced.

“Liam, you’re in
pain.”

“Head hurts.”  He
continued to slur his words.

“I wish I could
help you.”

“Need to rest.”

“I’ll stay here
with you.”

He shook his
head.

“You want me to
leave?”

“Need to rest.”

“Very well.
Fifteen minutes?”

He nodded.

“I’ll be across
the hall. I’ll check on you in 15 minutes.”

“Yes.”

“When you wake
up, we must talk about taking you to the hospital.”

He shook his
head.

“Liam, please.” 
She leaned down to kiss him on the lips.  “I love you.”

“Love you.” 

She began to walk
toward the door, then turned around. “You’re certain you wish for me to leave?”

Liam gave her a
drowsy smile.  “I. . .”

“What is it?”

“Well, I. . .”

Caroline hurried
back to his bedside and studied him.  He was contemplating her with an
expression filled with tenderness, and yet also, sadness.  “I want to be. . .a
better husband to you.”

“You are a
wonderful husband.  And I acted childish and was selfish to expect you to stay
with me.”

“You were. .
.right.”

Caroline stared
at him and bit down on her lip. “Please, Liam, we can’t change that now.”

Liam reached out
and took her hand in his.  He took a deep breath and worked hard at getting the
words out.  “Caroline, meeting you. . .best thing. . .ever happened. . .to me.”

“Oh, Liam.” She
leaned down to embrace him on the bed.  “I love you so.” 

“I want. . . the
best for you.”

“What’s best for
me is for you to get well.” She crawled in beside him. She placed her left hand
on his chest and felt the soft beating of his heart, reminiscent of how she
often lay with her father. She shuddered. 
But this is different.  Liam is
young. He will get better.