In the Wake of Wanting (43 page)

She nods her head and provides a small, yet genuine, smile. Gazing into my eyes, she presses her lips to mine. “Speaking of love…”

“Yes?” I ask, my heart racing, feeling every bit in love with her.

“Weren’t you going to
make love
to me tonight?” She licks her lips.

“But… that…” I point my thumb toward the headboard and cock my head.

“No,” she says, squinting her eyes. “If that was your version of
making love
, I’m frightened of your definition of
fucking
.”

I relax and grin at her challenge, then shake my head. “It was not. It was
supposed
to be that, but then you were introduced into the equation, and all hell broke loose.” Our lips meet again as I reach for another condom. “After this, you will understand making love with such clarity that you will be able to write ten separate and distinct volumes of poetry about it. So pay attention.”

Holding her in my arms, I roll onto the other side of the bed, settling on top of her; inside of her.

“Or don’t pay attention. Let’s get lost in this.”

We close our eyes, kissing in rhythm with our bodies’ slow and deliberate movements. Her moans are long and drawn out; her hands glide up and down the length of my back. Her feet flex and her toes curl against my leg muscles.

Sensing she’s easing into her climax, I roll over on my back and let her take control. She lies with her body flush against mine, but rocks against me, rolling her hips into mine deeper.

Her breathing quickens, and she pushes her torso off the bed. I hold her hair away from her eyes, fascinated by the look of sheer ecstasy on her face. I knead her breast with my other hand, and she places her hand on top of mine, holding it there, pressing it into her. As her hips pick up speed, she moves her other hand to her left breast, touching herself.

I let go of her and push against the bed, straining to kiss her. She meets me half way, which allows me to get her in a seated position in my lap.

With my hands pulling down on her shoulders, I thrust deeper. She threads her hands into my hair, whispering a lingering “yessssss” into my ear. I slow things down a little, wanting to feel more, feel longer, and hoping she does, too.

“Oh, yessss… like that, Trey. Ohhhh…” Her lips are hungry for mine now. The kisses are intense, mimicking our bodies’ motions once again in speed and depth. She gasps in my mouth, then sucks on my lip; then she does it again until the gasps become cries.

“Coley, oh, God.” I drop my hands to her waist and hold her still as she tightens around me and carries us through orgasms together. When we’re both coming down, I lie back on the bed and bring her with me, settling her against the pillow.

Again, being cautious, I clean up before returning to her. She puts one arm and leg across me and lays her head on my shoulder, leaving herself open to more kissing. I shift to angle myself a little better, because I’m pretty sure I could continue this all night. “I am forever indebted to you for this one night. I want you to know that,” I tell her. “I don’t want to speak ill of anyone, but I may as well have been a virgin coming into this. It’s nothing like sex has ever been for me before.”

“Liar,” she accuses.

“Am I blushing? Is my face turning red?”

“You’ve been flushed all night,” she comments.

“It’s not from lies.”

“Well, you’re not inexperienced, by any means.”

“Then consider me an ace pilot who’s spent thousands of hours in simulation and just experienced his first successful flight.”

“Thousands of hours?”

“I’m trying to relate it to
that
scenario. I’d rather not talk about my experience. I’m just trying to say that this all felt
very
different to anything I was accustomed to.”

“It all felt much better than anything I’ve experienced,” she says. “I’ve never wanted to go for a second round…”

I raise my brows. “Really?”

“No. It’s more like ‘hurry and get the first round over with’ for me.”

“Oh, shit.”

“I’ve been with douchebags, Trey.”

“You’ve been with guys who’ve only fucked you.”

She considers that statement. “You say that like it’s a negative. I love your always-skyward-facing moral compass, but I felt very close and connected to you when we were fucking tonight.”

I close my eyes, still coming to terms with that. “I hate that the first time we were together, we fucked.”

“I
love
that the first time we were together, we were so out-of-control in lust that we couldn’t wait to devour one another. Lust can be an expression of love, too, Trey. I’ve never felt like that for another person. I’ve never wanted anyone like I’ve wanted you.”

“Well,” I admit, “
that
feeling is mutual.”

“Love is more than what’s in here,” she says as she puts her hand over my heart. “It’s not cordoned off to one place. It’s what’s up here, too.” She pushes up off the bed and kisses my forehead, sweeping my hair back in the process.

“Okay, yeah… I agree with that.”

“Then…” she says as she slinks down the bed, “it’s what’s down here, too.” One of her hands cups my balls while the other traces down the center of my body. By the time she reaches my dick, it’s already showing its curiosity as to what she’s doing down there. She presses her lips just above my pubic bone. When she sits up, her fingers are wrapped around my erection.

“Would you like me to suck your cock?”

“Fuck, did you really just say that?!” I ask her, feeling my dick twitch in her hand. She giggles because she felt it, too. “Your tongue will be the death of me, laureate.”

She scrapes it across her teeth and nods as she looks up at me through her lashes. “Maybe…” I don’t bother to tell her that no one has ever given me head before. I just stare at her in awe as her lips close around me.

“Yeah, I just died,” I breathe as I grip the sheets beside me.

chapter twenty

Crawling back beneath the sheet, I drag my fingers across Coley’s ribcage as I lean over her and kiss her. I had gotten up early to work out at the gym on the second floor and shower, but I still had plenty of energy to spare that was begging for release. The way I was feeling was against the laws of physics and nature, I was certain. I shouldn’t be out of bed at all after the night we had, but I feel invigorated and excited, and I don’t want to waste a second of the time I have with her.

I was going to see if she’d bathe with me, but once I got in the bathroom, I could tell she had already soaked in the tub while I was at the gym. The soft scent of roses permeates every patch of skin my lips caress; coconut wafts from her hair. Once my tongue discovers her hard nipple, it lingers, encircling it slowly, daring it to become even more pronounced. I smile when it does, feeling victorious, then move my mouth down her body, between her legs.

Her fingernails scraping my scalp, I settle in to do some additional exploring to find out what makes her tick. What makes her
come
. I want to get it right every time we’re together.

“Trey!” someone yells from outside my door, just before pounding ensues. Startled, I throw off the sheet, which Coley hurries to pull back over her after I get up.

“Who’s that?” she asks, sitting up and frightened.

“Stay here.” With a raging hard-on straining to free itself from my briefs, I go to the entryway, recognizing Jon and Matty’s voices before I answer. “What the hell?” I pull a pillow over my crotch before deactivating the alarm and cracking open the door. “What’s going on?”

“You had a girl here last night?” my uncle asks, not even waiting for a response before they both burst into the apartment, bypassing me and walking straight through toward my balcony.

“Why is that your business?” I call after them, but they’re both preoccupied with whatever brought them here so urgently. “Excuse me!” I yell to them both. Matty turns around and sees Coley wrapped tightly in the sheet. She looks terrified.

“Sorry, miss,” my uncle says, looking away from her hurriedly. I eye him angrily as Jon tosses things around on my patio.

“Coley, it’s okay.” She meets me in the kitchen. “This is my uncle, Matty. You probably recognize my brother-in-law, Jon, although maybe not in this frenetic state. What the hell is going on, Matty?”

He signals for me to come over to him toward the balcony, away from Coley, so I do. He holds up his phone and hits play on a video.

It’s my living room.

It’s me and Coley entering my living room.

It’s me undressing Coley in my living room; her standing fully naked, me touching her body.

Matty drags the slider forward so I can see that it’s me performing oral sex on Coley last night.

“What the hell is that?!”

“It’s online,” he says.

“Where online?!”

“Everywhere!”

“How the fuck…” I look at Coley, feeling as if I might throw up. “Oh, my God.”

“Who has access to your balcony, Trey?” Jon asks, barging back into the apartment. “Have you had people over?” He spots Coley in the kitchen and stills. “Whoa. That’s her, isn’t it?” he asks Matty, pointing rudely. “She’s here.” He looks at me, then looks back at Coley. “Hey,” he says to her as an afterthought.

“Hi. I’m her…
who
exactly?”

“Just my friends when I’m here,” I interrupt her to answer his question, “and Jenny and the maintenance staff.”

“Could your neighbors gain access?” he asks me.

“Not without risking their lives. The nearest one with a balcony is five stories below.”

“Someone planted a camera out there, man.”

“
What?!
” Coley asks. We all look at her. I cross the room and join her once again. “A
camera
? Where?”

“It’s stuck on the railing with super glue or something,” Jon says. “I just moved your plant in front of it.” He points to the tall ficus tree.

“Where was it pointing?” she asks.

“Inside, into the living room,” I tell her softly.

“When was it filming?”

“Last night.”

“When?”

I nod my head.

“
Specifically
when?” she asks, getting angry.

“The entire time we were in there, from what I can tell,” I divulge. I look at my uncle.

“Beginning to end,” he says. “I didn’t watch,” he explains. “I just scrolled through. It ends with you two walking out of the frame.”

“To the bedroom,” I comment, putting my head into my hands.

“Where did you find this?” she asks.

“Online.”

“Oh, my God.”

“This could ruin us,” I say, looking around.

“
Us?
” Coley says. “
Me
. It will ruin
me
. It will earn you high praise and accolades.”

“Coley…”

“I was
completely
naked
, Trey. You weren’t!”

“I was as good as naked. We were
incredibly
intimate together,” I remind her.

“Did you film us?” she asks, looking disgusted.

“Holy shit!
No
, I didn’t film us! Our first kiss happened last night, Coley. I wanted us to be alone for it, if you remember. I wanted a private night alone with you. Because I wanted you all to myself… and you think I would take a video of us having sex and post it online? Come on, laureate. Knee jerk reaction, maybe?”

She sighs and takes a few breaths.

“I wouldn’t do that. Never,
ever
. You don’t think I would do that, do you?”

“No,” she says, coming to her senses. “No. I don’t think that. I’m just… shocked. And sick. And I’d feel better if these guys weren’t staring at me in a sheet right now.”

“Of course. Guys? Please?” Matty and Jon turn their backs to us as we both go into the bedroom and close the door.

“How do we know there aren’t more cameras?” she asks, looking around my room.

“In the spirit of full disclosure, there are cameras all over this place for my security system, but none on the patio. And none are recording when I’m here.” She doesn’t look reassured. “From what I saw, it was just that one single shot, from that one perspective,” I tell her as I pull on some jeans. “Take your time. I’m going to go talk to them.”

“Do you have cameras in your bathroom?”

“No,” I tell her, running my hand down her arm before she leaves my room to get dressed.