Inconvenient Relations (22 page)

“Is this what you were looking for, honey?” Shaan popped up beside her with a large bag of red kidney beans and acknowledged the girl with a pleasant nod.

The girl smiled back, then appeared to scrutinize both of them with a puzzled expression on her face.

She suspects we aren’t married,
Ruhi thought, rearranging the scarf nervously around her neck.

“Nice meeting you!” She nodded briskly before moving away.

Gosh, I feel so cheated! I can’t even take what is lawfully mine. And it’s all because of him. He has robbed me of my rights!

She wandered around the aisles aimlessly before making it to the front with a near empty cart. He was waiting there impatiently; it was closing time.

He looked at the cart and then at her bewildered. “What took you so long?”

“What’s it to you?” Ruhi asked.

They had Top Ramen for dinner.

Insanity

S
he cried that night, wept and bawled, threw the floodgates open, and let the raging waters flow out. To engulf and destroy mercilessly whatever it encountered in its path, a thorough cleansing of the mind and soul. But it wasn’t enough, the ugliness was too pervasive.

She mourned for Ruhi, for her lost innocence, for what had become of her love and her dreams; for Shaan, his miserable life, and his poor wife. She sobbed for lying alone in bed when he should have been there to console her and say, “Everything will be fine, darling.”

She stretched her arms out into the darkness hoping for some miracle.

“Oh, how I long for him to hold me, to caress me.”

Kisses and caresses.

“What if I don’t match up, then…will he leave me?”

Once he’s had you, he will come back to me...

Ruhi knew nothing of the devices women employed to maintain their hold on men. All she had was unlimited, unconditional love, that’s all, nothing fancy. But would it be enough for him? She wasn’t so sure now, and it terrified her. Her life had become one big horrible mess!

Why did people fall in love? Didn’t life have enough complications as is?

She heard a loud knock on the door. It was four in the morning, and she was wide awake, afraid to close her eyes for fear of that dreaded voice.

It was still dark but light enough for him to notice her bloodshot eyes.

“Ruhi,” he said, reaching out to touch her face and saw her step right back. Gritting his teeth, he figured it was time for some tough love.

“C’mon.We have a plane to catch in two hours. Take a quick shower and pack a bag.”

“Why, where are we going?” she asked.

“I’m not going to reveal it now, just that it’s going to be hot!” His lips twisted into a tender smile.

“Why didn’t you tell me last night? Why now?” she insisted.

He let out an exasperated sigh. “You weren’t in a receptive mood then. I think we need to get away for some time, you and I. We owe it to ourselves. Now don’t waste any more time, just pack for three nights. It’s going to be a short trip.”

“I am not going anywhere with you.” She moved to close the door.

“Oh no you don’t!” he shouted, thrusting his foot out and forcing the door open. “Did I give you an option to refuse? You can come willingly, or I will take you kicking and screaming. The choice is yours.”

“You won’t, you can’t force me!”

“I can and I will. Want me to show you?” He took a step toward her.

She saw he meant business. She could have tried harder but he was much stronger and determined and…what the heck? This was an attempt on his part to try to mend what was broken. Might as well give him a fair chance before calling it quits.
Quits!

“Fine! I will come,” she said, “but don’t try to take advantage of the situation. I’m not that weak or vulnerable.”

His eyes sparkled. “I’ll be the perfect gentleman as long as you behave yourself, or else all bets are off.”

***

LA International Airport.

This was where Ruhi had arrived just a bare two months ago. So much had changed since then.

“Are you looking for the international terminal? It’s down there,” he said, pointing in the direction. “But you’d need a ticket to fly.”

She scowled at him. “I’m not planning my escape, if that’s what you’re suggesting. I’ll definitely inform you before I leave.”

“Good! That’d save me quite a bit of time and trouble.”

They were in the departure lounge with still an hour to kill, and neither was in the mood for talk.

“Stay here and don’t leave. This place is too big, and I bloody hell don’t want to miss the flight! I’ll be back in ten,” Shaan said before vanishing amidst the crisscrossing throng.

“Didn’t I tell you to stay put?” he demanded furiously when he found her in the bookstore half an hour later. “Do you have murder on your mind?”

She remained silent.

“That’s a good one,” he remarked on seeing Khalid Hosseini’s
A Thousand Splendid Suns
in her hand. “Read it…” He himself picked up a copy of
Kite Runner.
“…since we are in no mood to talk.” And rushed her to the gate just as the final boarding for the flight departing to Las Vegas was announced.

“Vegas! Are you mad! I’m in no mood to gamble or watch risqué adult shows!” she muttered indignantly as they took their seats.

“Neither am I…or come to think of it, a show may not be a bad idea after all,” he said, his eyes sweeping over her thoughtfully.

She flushed. “Don’t play games with me. I’m warning you.”

“I’m not. Will you just shut up for a while and let me concentrate on my book?”

They didn’t talk anymore nor did they get through more than a dozen pages of their respective novels; the stories struck too close to home.

***

Las Vegas: the city of sin where anything goes, where people come to indulge in their wildest fantasies and forget for once who they are supposed to be.

It didn’t look particularly sinful to Ruhi as they drove along The Strip, the main boulevard, in the early morning. It looked dead…a ghost city.

“They are all sleeping off their respective nights of indulgence,” Shaan said, guessing correctly what was passing through her mind. “Past midnight is when all the action is. C’mon, let’s rest up a bit.”

The Venetian Resort and Casino.

Ruhi’s mouth dropped open; she had never expected to come across the Italian city in the midst of the desert—architecture, shops, restaurants, even gondolas with singing gondoliers plying on a miniature Grand Canal; everything bathed in an aura of unimaginable luxury—it felt almost surreal.

“What do you think?” Shaan asked with a smile as they rode the glass-enclosed elevator.

“It’s stunning!” Ruhi said.

“There you go, sir, madam, have a pleasant stay,” the uniformed bellhop said, opening the door to their room. He bowed extra low when Shaan tipped him generously.

“So what do we have here?” Shaan asked.

“You conniving rogue! What do you take me for?” Ruhi spluttered with anger as she pointed a shaking finger at the huge king size bed which occupied pride of place in the large, extravagantly-appointed suite.

Shaan was nonplussed. “What do you mean?”

Once he gets what he wants from you…

Her bosom heaved while her mind worked up a delirium. “Don’t put on an act,” Ruhi said. “You know very well what I mean! You brought me here under false pretenses so you could impose your will on me. You want to have your cake and eat it too? I won’t let that happen. I…I will jump off the balcony before I let you touch me!” She raced toward the French double doors.

“I have no interest in making the headlines tomorrow!”

He grabbed her by the waist, scooped her up as easy as a feather, before flinging her on the bed and throwing himself right on top. “Does the very thought of me making love to you sound so repulsive?”

She shook her head. “No.”

“Then I’m willing to remain celibate for the rest of my life if it’d prevent even a single tear from escaping your eyes. Oh, Ruhi, when…when will you realize that I’m not your worst enemy?” He sighed, lowering his head beside hers, wanting to drink in her loveliness and erase her fears the best way he could.

Then getting up abruptly, he said, “Enough of this lunacy! Let’s get something to eat. There is another place I want us to go.”

***

He had rented an olive-green jeep.

The long solitary four-and-half-hour drive took them through some of the most desolate environs she had ever seen. The lonely highway meandered through miles upon miles of barren yet stunning landscape, of sprawling desert, towering cliffs, and huge rock clusters in brilliant shades of red, orange, and brown that hemmed them in on either side and held her in speechless awe.

He stole a glance at her and relaxed a little. At last he could see a glimmer of the old Ruhi, the girl who by the very force of her personality had changed the entire course of his life, the one he loved with a passion almost close to madness.

He hoped this journey they were taking together would help get rid of some of the bitterness they had landed themselves in and instead replace them with good memories.

Grand Canyon National Park is a geological marvel encompassing more than a million acres of rock formation cut by the Colorado River into a 277-mile long and a mile-deep canyon over a period of a billion years.

It was twilight by the time they reached their destination. “We shall come back tomorrow for a better look at the canyon, but the views by night are equally breathtaking,” he said, obviously excited while she was simply blown away.

Afraid to speak lest it disturb the profound quietude, she clambered down on to an outcrop of ancient rock. Solitude had never appeared so appealing to her; this was the ultimate piece of heaven. She stood on tiptoe and peeped over the ledge where she could see almost nothing but a deep never-ending chasm, the walls of which had been eroded over millions and millions of years.

There was the culprit river snaking like a silver thread far, far below.

What would happen if I stepped off the edge? Would everything be over in a second or would it take as long as a minute? Death is a very attractive prospect right now. To end it all then be dug up a million years from now like a dinosaur and be exhibited in a museum for people to gawk at. What would my legacy be? What would they label me as?

“A unique specimen of a married virgin.” She almost laughed out loud.
Yes, that would be my sole claim to fame!

With her hands trembling, she clutched hard onto the safety railing and closed her eyes and saw the face that had been haunting her.
Damnit!

How to shut the mind’s eye? How to ward off the taunts, the shame, the embarrassments, so I can have some peace?

“Ruhi, come over here.”

Snapping out of her disturbed musings, she looked over to where he was standing as he perused the brilliant night sky over the canyon with the help of his portable telescope.

“This is one of the best places on earth for stargazing,” he said, the enthusiasm in his voice palpable. “Look! You can even see the Andromeda galaxy with your naked eye!”

“Where? I don’t see anything.”
Andromeda galaxy? He has gone loco!

“Look for a little cloud of stars. Here, let me help you focus,” he said, handing her the telescope, his head bending close, fingers brushing against hers.

A stinging burn…

He walked away quickly.
I can’t lose control, not now!

“Shaan?” She found him standing next to the jeep, lost deep in thought.

“Hmm?” He kept his face averted.

“You walked away…why?” she asked.

“Just a calf cramp, no big deal.”

A wild thought struck her, a rash gamble. “Will you kiss me, Shaan?”

“What?”

“You heard me right. Will you kiss me right now?”

He stared at her as though beholding an apparition, a pulse hammered haywire in his throat. Could it be true?

“You see, I have never been kissed before. So why not now? And it would make more sense to be kissed by my husband than by a complete stranger, don’t you think?”

Gawd! This can’t be for real. She would never say that, especially now.

“Is it too much to ask for? If so I…” She looked down at her feet.

“No, of course not!” he said.

With a shaking hand, he removed her ranger’s hat, allowing her hair to cascade down to her shoulders. She looked uncommonly bewitching.

Holding her face in his hands, he stroked her cheek, then gently ran his thumb across her chin. Yes, she was for real. Still unsure, he bent down and their lips met. She didn’t cower or move away.

Now more certain, driven by an unfulfilled hunger, his mouth pressed down on her full lips, imbibing them, relishing their softness and flavor. They tasted of berries, ripened in the summer sun, sweet and a little sour, just perfect.

He felt her hands spread on his hips, the pressure of her fingers communicating her desire. Encouraged, he pressed her back against the door and boldly invaded her mouth with his tongue, exploring those pearly whites, drinking her warm nectar, claiming her for his very own.

She moaned, weaving her fingers through his hair, kissing him back with an equal ardor.

The heat spread up his body and threatened to consume him.

He opened the rear door of the jeep and laid her down gently while covering her face with gentle passion; he wanted their union to be immaculate. She responded, nipping his neck and pulling his body down hard on hers so he could feel her rounded softness crushed against his chest.

He whispered into her ear, “I love you, Ruhi. I love you so much!”

Her eyes snapped wide open.

It’s all just physical…

She pushed him away. “No, don’t say that!”

“Say what?”

“That you love me! You don’t know what love is. It’s all but a physical thing for you!”

He withdrew from her, infuriated. “Did that godforsaken bitch tell you that? And you trust her more than me, your husband who for the past two months hasn’t demanded his marital rights when he could have done so quite easily? Not that I didn’t find you attractive. In fact, I find you extremely alluring right now. Hence, if you wish to call it physical, then so be it!”