It's All Relative (50 page)

Jessie dried his cheek and pulled him into a hug. “I don’t know, Kai. It couldn’t have been an easy decision for them. And it’s probably been tearing them up, waiting to hear if you…knew.”

Kai pulled back from her suddenly, his eyes wide with understanding. “That’s why.” His gaze drifted over her shoulder as his mind made some mental connection. “That’s why my mom always asks about work, always asks if I like my boss. She’s been waiting to hear if he…” Kai sighed and closed his eyes. “And my dad…no wonder he’s been so distant lately. They were both waiting for me to…to suddenly hate them or something.” Opening his eyes, he shook his head. “Their entire reason for arranging for me to be out here was a lie. How am I supposed to feel about that?”

Jessie ran her fingers down his shoulder to grab his hand again; it was finally warm. “Angry. Hurt. Confused.” She shook her head. “Whatever you’re feeling right now is just what you should be feeling, and it’s okay to feel it.” Kai stared at her a moment, then nodded. Jessie sighed as she gazed at their joined fingers. “Do you think…Grams…knows?”

She peeked up at him when she heard his weary exhale. “Yeah…I think she does. She stopped coming around when my parents got divorced. I didn’t think much about it until I was older, and then I just figured she didn’t like someone hurting her son…” Hanging his head, he shrugged. “But that wasn’t entirely it. She hates my mom because she knows about the affair. Because she knows about me.”

Jessie lowered her head to look up at his face. “You can’t know that. Divorces happen for all sorts of reasons, Kai. She didn’t necessarily know. Your dad might not have told her.”

Kai’s features smoothed to blankness and his voice lost all emotion. “She asks if I’m happy at work almost every time I see her. Why would she do that…if she wasn’t waiting for me to be suddenly unhappy?”

Jessie looked away, thinking. He was right. Grams always seemed like she was waiting for Kai to have a breakdown. In fact, she was always telling Jessie that she needed to stay close to Kai, that he needed the two of them. Jessie had just assumed that she’d meant in the grand scheme of things, they needed each other, but she hadn’t. She’d specifically meant that once Kai found out the truth about his father, he would need their support.

Compassion for Kai flooded through her. Everyone he was closest to had kept this from him. She slowly nodded. “You’re right…she knows, she’s always known.”

Kai’s face crumpled into a worn, heartbroken expression that tugged on Jessie’s soul; she hated seeing him in pain. Closing his eyes, he leaned into her side. “I’m so glad I have you, Jessie. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Jessie’s eyes started to brim with tears. Not able to stand his grief anymore, she pulled him in for another hug. Kai buried his head into her shoulder as he held her tight. Gently rocking him, Jessie warmed and comforted him the best she could. She wasn’t really sure how to help him though. How do you help someone who just found out that the person they believed was a family member their entire life…wasn’t family at all?

A sudden realization struck Jessie to her core.
He
…wasn’t family. Not to Jessie. Genetically speaking, Kai was as much of a stranger to Jessie as Jeremy had been. Every muscle tensed as stiff as stone, as she finally comprehended what Kai’s news meant for the two of them.

Confused by the rigidness in her body, Kai pulled back to stare at her. “Jessie?” he whispered, searching her eyes for some clue of what was wrong.

Jessie didn’t know what to feel. She’d wanted him for so long, but he had always been out of reach. Taboo. But now…while they would still seem like cousins to most, they weren’t. That changed a lot. That changed
everything
.

“We’re not related, Kai,” she murmured, her voice as dazed as his had been earlier.

Kai studied her for a moment before his mouth fell open in understanding. He’d been so preoccupied with trying to come to terms with the reality of his parentage that he hadn’t had a chance to think about their situation, and what his true lineage did for them. His eyes flicked across her face. “We’re…not related,” he repeated.

They both stared at each in silence, processing. Jessie’s heart began to race as Kai’s eyes pierced through every inch of her. Her breath increased as they watched each other, frozen, unable to move. Being in love with each other had been so wrong for so long that it was a little hard to move past that feeling.

But…they did.

At the same time that Kai leaned toward her, she leaned toward him. Their mouths met, and they exhaled in relief as they were finally able to connect without feeling the bitter bite of guilt and revulsion. They kissed softly, letting just their lips explore the other’s. It was simple and honest and pure, and it nearly split Jessie’s heart wide open. She’d wanted this for so long, wanted him for so long…and it was finally okay to have him.

Kai strung his fingers through her hair, not deepening the kiss in any way, just savoring the curled strands that he loved. They sat on the couch side-by-side and moved their mouths together as innocently and sweetly as if it was their first kiss…with anyone. Jessie reveled in his soft lips, the way his hand brushing through her hair would sometimes run down her cheek. She couldn’t remember the last time she had been with a boy and just enjoyed the simple act of kissing.

But they weren’t teenagers anymore, and they’d been denying themselves this moment for a really long time now. After a long eternity of tenderly feeling each other, Jessie pressed harder against his lips and finally flicked her tongue against the tip of his. Kai’s chest rumbled with approval and he tilted his mouth so he could caress his tongue along the length of hers.

Jessie ran her hands up his chest and around the back of his neck to his hair. Her fingers threaded through the dark strands, grazing his scalp in the process, as their mouths began to move with more urgency, more passion. Kai ignited her body with every movement of his lips, exhale of his breath, and touch of his tongue. She wanted to expand on this feeling blossoming inside her, wanted to know what it would be like to connect with him intimately, without the horror they’d been fighting through. Now that he was essentially a stranger again, in the genetic sense, she wanted to express how much she loved him physically. She wanted to give him
every
part of her.

As her fingers tightened in his hair, his hands moved to rest on her neck. His thumbs stroked along her jaw, while their mouths moved in perfect sync—exploring, tasting, indulging. Taking a chance, Jessie decided to be the forward one. She was going to ask for what she wanted, now that she could do it with a clear conscience.

Breaking away from his searching mouth, she pulled back to gaze at him with lust-filled eyes. His eyes—those beautiful ocean orbs that had captivated her from the very first glance—stared straight back at her, unafraid, unregretful, and burning with desire. Jessie absorbed the passion emanating from him, then breathily said his name. “Kai?”

He kissed her softly before pulling back to stare at her again. “Yes?”

She smiled briefly, wondering if his thoughts were in line with hers. “Will you do something for me?”

Shaking his head, Kai leaned in for a long, deep kiss. “Anything,” he whispered. His breath tickled her skin, but that one single word amplified the ache deep within her.

Jessie gently pushed him away from her; she wanted him to see her face when she spoke her heart. Her gaze drifted between his eyes while he waited for her to speak with a soft smile on his lips. When she finally did, a similar smile was on hers. “Make love to me?”

M
ake love to me.

The words echoed through Kai’s head in waves as he lost himself in the beautiful depths of Jessie’s eyes. In moments of weakness, moments of loneliness, he’d fantasized about her say that to him. But he never thought it would happen. There had always been too much in their way before, too many barriers that even the immense love between them couldn’t overcome. And then, on possibly the worst day of Kai’s life, all of the walls had been broken down for them.

So many horrible and painful things had been running through his mind this morning that the one bright spot in all of this ugliness hadn’t been immediately apparent. Jessie had had to point it out. By losing the genetic tie to the man he knew as his father, he’d also lost the genetic tie to Jessie. They were free, nothing more than…step-cousins. And not even that, since his parents were no longer married. They were ex step-cousins. And he could live with that.

Kai could scarcely believe that the woman he’d wanted for months, the woman he’d quite possibly been waiting for his entire life, was now available to him…with no guilt, no disgust, no regret. The joy in his heart made all of the earlier ache evaporate. The sting of betrayal was still there, but he shoved it deep down. He’d deal with that pain later. Right now, he wanted to feel something…incredible. Something life-altering. Kai wanted to show Jessie how much he loved her, how deeply entrenched she was in his heart.

Kai opened his mouth to answer her, but a knot of emotion closed off his throat. Swallowing, he tried again. “I’d make love to you every day, if you’d have me.”

As she gave him a love-filled smile, her eyes began to water. “I’ll have you,” she whispered, softly laughing on the end. The heat in the low sound radiated throughout every part of him, melting the residual chill in his body. He finally felt warm again.

Hating to be apart from her, Kai’s mouth returned to Jessie’s. Their lips never parting, he shrugged the unneeded blanket off his body. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he encouraged Jessie to stand with him. Walking backwards, he led her to the hallway, to her bedroom. The memory of their previous slipup heated his blood, but unlike before, the flashes of desire were welcome; he couldn’t wait to touch her soft skin again.

Jessie’s arms slipped around his neck as she shuffled forward, following his steps. It was difficult to walk backwards, especially in a house that he didn’t have memorized. It was even more challenging with a gorgeous woman sliding her tongue along the roof of his mouth. Kai couldn’t help but close his eyes and groan. He also smacked right into an end table. Laughing as they broke apart, Kai involuntarily sat down on the edge of the table. Jessie took the opportunity to straddle his thighs and press her chest into his face.

Crooking a grin, Kai leaned down to kiss a soft mound through her jacket. Jessie bit her lip then ripped off her jacket. Kai’s mouth started to widen, but then he froze mid-smile. Not satisfied with just her jacket, Jessie also stripped off the tight sweater she was wearing. Desire shot right like a lightning bolt as he stared at the bounty on display for him. And…dear God…she was wearing black lace. He was instantly hard as she dug her hands through his hair and forced his lips to the swell of snow-white skin above her bra cup. Damn, he loved it when she was aggressive.

Cupping her backside as he tasted the sweet flavor of her flesh, he pulled her hips into his. She let out an erotic groan when she pressed against his readiness. Kai loved that he couldn’t hide how much he wanted her, loved that she knew just how much he ached for her. And he really loved the moan she made when she lowered her hips to his and ground against his erection. Kai felt his body throb and had to remind himself to be patient. Taking her on the end table in the living room was probably not what she had in mind. Although, with the desperate way she rubbed against him, the location might not matter much at this point.

Grunting, Kai stood with her. No, he was going to do something that he had been wanting to do for a while now. He was going to take his time. Kai resumed their trek to the bedroom, only now Jessie was the one walking backwards. Jessie had a lot less trouble traversing her home blind, and didn’t bump into anything. As the shuffled along, Kai’s hands traveled down her neck, to her chest, to her jeans. He started unfastening them, and with Jessie’s help, halfway down the hall they were halfway down her hips. Jessie shimmied them all the way off while simultaneously kicking off her shoes. By the time they were at her bedroom, she was free of the denim, and all she was wearing…was black lace.

Kai stopped and stared at the beautiful woman before him once they were both inside the door. Smiling, he reached behind himself and pulled the door shut. With just their breaths filling up the space in the quiet room, they reunited.

Kai’s wandering fingers slid over the bare areas of her body, highlighted in that wondrous lace. Jessie’s hands slipped under his shirts, lifting them up. Kai helped her stretch the multiple pieces of fabric over his head. Jessie’s breath quickened as he was slowly exposed. Lips parted, she lightly trailed her fingers up his skin. Every time her fingernail grazed him, it sent electricity shooting through him. Her lips lowered to his chest and Kai closed his eyes as her tongue swirled around his nipple. His body twitched as the throbbing ache grew painful. He needed her. So much.

Breathing heavier, Kai shucked off his shoes, then worked on his pants. He was having trouble concentrating, especially when Jessie playfully nipped his skin. He fumbled with his pants as he hissed in a breath, and eventually Jessie helped him. Always helping him.