July (The Year of The Change Book 1) (22 page)

The twins were up and eager to eat. We didn't tell them about Mary. Tam didn’t ask as she looked me over with concern. As emotional as I’d been this year it was a wonder she didn’t avoid me altogether. Tim was completely clueless. I preferred it that way. I didn’t like when they had to suffer with me.

Just like I’d thought, Sue bustled around, breezing in and out of the kitchen as she prepared the van and packed the twins’ suitcases. It didn’t take her long before she appeared to be in control again.

By the time Dad and Rob came in to wash up, breakfast was ready and my stomach screamed to be fed.

Rob had his scary face firmly in place. The red swollen eyes reminded me of the sorrow we’d shared in the upper pasture. Every so often when I looked up at him, his mask would slip and I could see the vulnerable Rob that was hurting.

The others kept a generic conversation going, even Dad helped it along. The brooding boy was quieter than I was. He must’ve been determined to be in full control of his emotions, at least on the surface.

We cleared the breakfast dishes just as Jimmy and his family showed up. Now my raw emotions would have to face the big farewell scene. My heart was spent and I didn’t know how much more I could handle.

I went to get my stuff to put in the car for the next big leg of our journey. Plopping on the bed next to my suitcase I breathed in deeply and calmed myself. Sue had already made the bed and tidied everything during her effort to get past the emotions she refused to admit she had. I could imagine Gram and her younger sister curled up in the frilly bed whispering their secrets to each other before they fell asleep each night. Gram would’ve liked this room. I liked this room.

I would miss Aunt Betty.

Dragging off the bed, I picked up my artist pad from the vanity. I couldn't believe I'd missed that when I packed. As I went to shove it in my tote bag, I wondered if I’d drawn anything new. This year I’d become known as the artist wonder. Of course, I couldn’t tell anyone it was because of The Change. It wasn’t unusual for me not to remember taking the pad out. I could’ve been drawing the whole time I was here and not known. Sometimes my ‘talent’ would pop out of nowhere. I shouldn’t have been surprised when I flipped the book open. Even so, I gasped as a new drawing stared up at me. Two older women so close in looks one would think they were twins. They both had their arms wrapped around each other’s waists with smiles so big they filled their aged angelic faces.

Anne and Betty.

They were beautiful. I’d tried many times to draw Gram, but never could. I must’ve drawn this one during one of the nights when I thought I was asleep. I should give it to Aunt Betty, even though I wanted to keep it. Tearing it out I placed it on the beautiful vanity.

Under the picture of my grandmother and Aunt Betty was another picture and it too made me gasp. It was a picture of Rob smiling broadly holding a pretty brunette with big brown eyes. Her hair was cut short to her jaw line and she wore a diamond ring on her left hand. There was happiness in store for Rob. My heart swelled and a tear of joy fell. He would be alright. I left both pictures on the vanity. Aunt Betty would know what to do with them.

Dad called. Reluctantly, I dragged my suitcase off the bed. As hard as it had been to come here, I found it even harder to leave. One last look around before I left the very frilly pink room brought more tears. A quick swipe and they were gone. The emotion, however lingered long after I turned out the light.

Rob met me in the living room and took my bag keeping his eyes averted as he went out the front door. I felt so bad for him. Losing Mary was hard for me. It had to be a hundred times harder for him. I wished I could show him the picture and tell him there was joy ahead. I wanted to hug him and make all his pain go away. Sigh. That would’ve been the opposite of helpful. Knowing everything would turn out okay for him made it easier for me to do what I needed to.

Jimmy gave me a big hug. “We’re going to miss having you here. Are you sure you wouldn’t consider staying at least for the summer?”

I shook my head. There was no way on God’s green earth I could stay. Even if I wasn’t going through this awful Change, it would take a long time before I got over Mary.

Jon shook his head with a smile. “You just want her around so you don’t have to herd the sheep.”

Jimmy blushed with a big grin. “Well yeah, that too.”

Everyone laughed and a part of me wanted to stay. I needed to be where my dad could protect me. Without my father, I knew I’d end up like Mary. I shuddered at the thought. Did he care enough that I wouldn’t end up like the little lamb on the hillside, anyway? I shoved the thought out of my head. I had to have faith.

The good-byes were said and we loaded into the van. Jimmy and I exchanged email addresses. It was interesting that Jimmy wrote Rob’s email address on the slip of paper, too. Aunt Betty put a large sack of very good smelling baked goods in the middle of the minivan near me. That wasn’t a safe place. Then again, that might’ve been her intent. In any case my stomach took it that way.

Before my door closed, Bandit stuck his big head in. I petted him one last time. He must’ve known what was happening because he tried to climb in with me. The guys had to pick him up and remove him from my lap. I hated to leave the big shaggy dog. Sue would never allow me to keep him and we had a very long way to go. My heart cracked a little as I watched him being held back. Someday I would get a dog of my own. Maybe I’d get a wolf like the one in my dreams.

Rob, standing behind Jimmy, held my stare for a long moment. I could see the pain in his eyes and wished again to get out of the van and hold him one last time. If only I could take his emotional pain away, the same as I helped people with their physical pain. A stupid idea, if ever there was one. Something else I couldn’t do because of The Change. According to my talent I wasn’t the one who was supposed to do that. The drawing floated in my mind. She’d better be good to him.

Jimmy shoved a small, brown paper sack into my lap before he closed the van door. Written on the outside was ‘to Sylvia, from Rob.’ I looked at Jimmy who grinned and winked. I looked at Rob, who looked in the other direction.

Dad shook Jon’s hand and made him promise they would come visit us in Alaska. He hugged Julie before he turned to Aunt Betty.

“You must come visit us, too. Next summer, everything should be all settled down.” They looked at each other in silent communication. Next summer I would be past The Change and she could see me as she should’ve seen Gram.

Aunt Betty smiled warmly. “I would like that very much.” With her apron she dabbed at her eyes.

“Good, then we’ll plan on it.” Dad took her in his arms as though he were holding his mom.

They hugged tightly before reluctantly letting go. Did he get the feeling he was holding Gram, just like I did?

Inside the bag was a small stuffed lamb. The tears jumped out before I could look up at Rob. Our eyes met again and two kindred spirits became forever friends. I waved good-bye. He half heartily raised his hand and forced a smile. I smiled back and hugged the lamb to my face.

Dad climbed in and turned the van around in Aunt Betty’s large, gravel driveway before we took off for the dusty dirt road that would take us to the highway. We all knew it would be a very long time before we would see any of them again. Tim and Sue were the only ones that didn’t have tears in their eyes.

From Aunt Betty's we went straight north to Bellingham near Seattle, Washington. There we would catch a ferry boat that would sail us and our tired minivan to Whittier, on the southern coast of Alaska. It was rather exciting. I'd never been on a boat big enough to hold one car, let alone sixty-two.

It was quite the scene at the dock as people lined up their vehicles to wait two hours for their turn to drive onboard.

The wait was torture for me. I watched as the twins ran around looking at all the new stuff on the dock while Dad and Sue talked to other people, who also waited to board. The wind whipped around and everyone wore coats or jackets against the chill. Though summer, the stiff wind roared in from the ocean and the sun was clouded over. I stayed in the minivan, where it was safe, while the others got to stretch their legs. This was not going to be a fun voyage for me.

Being cooped up on a boat with hundreds of people at the mercy of The Change was a cruel and dangerous thing to do to the unsuspecting crew and passengers. Unfortunately, the alternative of driving all the way there would just take too long.

The hope was that if I stayed in the cabin for the two days, then the affects could be kept at a minimum. By the way some of the young guys near our minivan were already looking confused I had my doubts. They hadn't zeroed in on me yet, thank goodness. It was only a matter of time, though. I slouched down in my seat even though I knew they couldn't see me through the tinted glass if I didn't move.

I made sure all the doors were locked securely after Dad punched the control on his key ring. I still wasn't completely over the incident at the baseball game.

The workers on the dock went about getting the boat ready to sail. Bored out of my mind, I eventually drifted off. Napping fitfully, I jerked awake often.

When it was our turn to board, my family climbed in and we slowly drove across the bridge, over the tailgate of the boat and down into the hold. There, men waited to park our vehicle. I didn’t like the close quarters and scanned every which way to find the exits. If I became desperate, I could dive off the tailgate. I wouldn’t mind a swim, although the water looked rather oily.

No putting it off once the engine was cut. We piled out and grabbed our suitcases while an older man, with a clipboard, filled out a sheet and handed Dad a portion torn from the bottom and an information packet. That must’ve been our claim ticket so we could get the minivan back.

Disaster almost struck. I dashed back for the food basket and grabbed it before Dad locked our vehicle. Sue had packed it especially for my stomach and it would’ve been calamitous if it were left behind. We wouldn't be allowed to come back to our vehicle after they secured it for the voyage until we were in the next port.

Some of the guys eyed me with grins and I avoided them. Impatient to get to our room so I could hide, I found it hard to stand still. We were brought a luggage cart and all the young men near us helped to load it. When done, Dad had me push the cart and he followed close behind to keep the still overly helpful, affected guys at bay.

The man in charge, the one with the clipboard, must’ve realized there was a problem and barked orders as he dispersed his men back to work. As we walked away, he took his cap off and scratched his grey thinning hair as he looked back and forth between his men –who were still agitated -- and us walking away. We were just an average-looking family, so I doubted he understood the weirdness. What he didn't know hopefully wouldn't hurt him. This could be a voyage he wouldn't soon forget.

In the packet was a map with the shortest route to our cabin highlighted. Every time a member of the crew happened to walk by, or made the mistake of standing still too long, Sue snagged them to make sure we were going in the right way. Dad was irritated at her doubting his sense of direction. I was afraid of taking a wrong turn and starting a riot so was glad when Sue ignored his irritation. There were the odd moments when Sue and I saw eye to eye. Even with Sue stopping to check our direction after each major turn, we made our way quickly.

As always, I kept my eyes moving, wary of all the males onboard. Because of this paranoia, I noticed what Dad didn‘t as he followed the map. With each turn and stairs that we took, the line of glazed-over followers grew. If we had music and no Change we could’ve had one heck of a conga line.

We finally found the hall to our cabin. At the end of that hall there was a young man who leaned against the emergency fire hose cabinet. He watched our progression down the passageway with an amused look on his face. He had a backpack slung over one shoulder, and his clothes, though clean, had seen better days. Halfway down Dad stopped and announced we’d arrived at our cabin.

Though I was in a hurry to get inside, the man at the end of the hall held my attention. His sandy brown hair stuck out all over his head and framed a heart-shaped face where his sneer looked right at home. His eyes were light brown and small under his tangle of bangs, however their size meant nothing to the anger that glared out of them. He turned that angry stare on me and I shivered.

A purser walked up to him and asked to see his ticket as he looked through papers on his clipboard.

The shabby young man barely glanced at the purser before he shrugged from the wall and walked toward us with his eyes down.

The purser looked up and then swiveled his head from side to side as though he couldn't see the man walking down the hall. Was he blind? I could see him. In fact, my eyes were locked on him as he neared. He paused across the way and looked over. His face registered surprise when our eyes met.

At that moment, Dad grabbed my arm, pulled me inside and quickly shut the door before any of the affected guys could get in.

The room was compact, with all the amenities. My stomach disagreed because it didn't have a well-stocked fridge.

I put my suitcase on the bunk closest to the bathroom.

There was a couch that folded out for Dad and Sue and two berths, as seaworthy folk would call it. I wasn't sea-worthy so they were just bunk beds to me. Each bunk bed had a sliding curtain for privacy. The shower and toilet were in a small closet with the sink just outside the door. The table was attached to the wall and we would have to swing it up to use it and lower the benches to sit at the table.

Tam took off her coat. “I get the bed above Sylv.

“No you don’t, I do.” Tim threw his pack on the top bunk and scrambled up.

Their argument escalated quickly.

I grabbed my suitcase and threw it on the other set of bunks. "You both can have that side."

Dad pulled up a lopsided smile. "Thanks, Sylv."

"No problem, I'll probably sleep better over here where I won't have to listen to Tam snore." I grinned playfully at her.

"I don't snore," Tam stated indignantly.

Tim laid across the top bunk. "Yeah, ya do." He peeked down at her. "You snore like a chainsaw on steroids."

"I do not!" Her lower lip quivered

"Do so!"

"Mo-om!" The waterworks built pressure.

Sue slumped to the couch. "Honey, you don't snore like a chainsaw on steroids." She leaned back and rested her head with eyes closed.

Tam turned back to Tim. "See, told ya so!" She stuck her tongue out at him.

He snickered and closed the curtains on his bed.

I was tired of the trip and the motion of the boat had me off balance. Moving my bags over, I made space on the bottom bunk, and closed my curtains for privacy. A nap was just what I needed.

He had me in a death grip. He was pulling me under the water. If I couldn't get him to let go soon we both were going to drown. I flung my arms and legs in every direction. I couldn’t fight him off. He shook me. I wouldn’t give up the struggle to free myself.

"Whoa, Sylv!" It was my father.

Why wasn't he helping me escape?

"Sylvia, wake up!"

Dad pulled a blanket off that was wrapped tightly over my head. I blinked and realized I wasn't in the water and there wasn't anyone else in my bunk. There was only my dad and the twins peeking in at me. I stopped thrashing, sat up, and pulled my knees to my chest, as I leaned against the wall.

"Wow, what a dream." I breathed in deep and let it out slowly.

Dad chuckled and opened the curtains all the way. "You had me scared. I thought for a moment there one of those affected boys had gotten in."

"Yeah, we all jumped when you started kicking the curtain with both feet." Tim crawled up and sat beside me.

I shook my head. "No, I was dreaming some guy was trying to drown me."

Dad snorted. "That's a lost cause. You're part fish, there's no way you'd ever drown."

I grinned despite my heart still racing around my ribs. "Never a truer statement."

My stomach growled reminding everyone it was still here and hadn't been feed in an hour or two. "How long until we cast off and they open the galley?"

"Actually, we cast off over an hour ago."

"Really? How long did I sleep?"

Dad looked at his watch. "Almost three hours."

No wonder my stomach was testy. "Wow, I didn't realize I was so sleepy." My stomach growled, it insisted on being fed.

"The twins and I will go get lunch and bring it back here."

I looked around. "Sue's not going?"

Sue didn't usually stay alone with me if she could help it.

Dad looked over his shoulder. "No, Sue isn't feeling well."

Past my father, the couch had been pulled out into a bed. Sue laid curled up with a wet wash cloth draped over her forehead and eyes.

"Did she get the flu or something?"

"No, she's seasick."

"Bad break, can you get her some of those motion sickness pills on the boat?"

"I'm sure I can, they'd be pretty stupid not to stock them. I figured I'd find them while we were out getting food."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No, we just need to leave her alone and let her sleep."

They left and I lay back down, not wanting to disturb Sue. I’d gotten sea sick once when my grandparents took me to Galveston where we rented a sailboat for the day. It was a horrible feeling and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I must’ve dozed because I jerked awake when the door opened. In rushed Dad and the twins, laden with enough food to feed ten people. In other words, they got enough food to feed me, too.

Sue rolled over and moaned.

Dad put his large box on the table and dug out a bottle. "I got you the pills, honey. Sylv, get a glass of water for Sue."

Jumping up I unwrapped a plastic glass from next to the sink and filled it with water from a full bottle in my tote. I brought it to Dad who sat on the edge of the bed rubbing Sue's back lightly. You know how people say 'you look a little green around the gills' when you're sick? It's only a figure of speech. Sue really did look a little green in her face as she sat up with Dad's help. She quickly swallowed the pill with just a bare sip of water before she slumped back on the mattress. Moaning, she rolled to her side and curled into a ball. It made me queasy just watching her.

Sue slept while we ate. The only thing left when my stomach was done was a bowl of chicken noodle soup. We saved it for Sue in case she felt well enough to eat when she woke. The way she moaned the few times she moved made me doubt she would want it. My stomach insisted it should take care of the soup so it didn't go to waste. Stupid stomach.

Tam and I cleaned up lunch while Dad and Tim looked over the ship pamphlets to see what there was to do. There wasn't much in the way of entertainment. There was an arcade and a movie theater, neither of which I could go to. Tomorrow, a U.S. forest ranger, Ranger Bob, would board and conduct free naturalist programs in the afternoon. Anything to do with the outdoors I was interested in and would like to have gone. That, too, wasn't going to happen. Tim and Tam would tell me all about it. Still, it just wouldn't be the same.

Speaking of the twins, they’d found something to fight over and their volume spiked.

Dad folded the brochures and tossed them on the small table. "I'm going to take the twins and walk around the ship so Sue can sleep."

"Yah!" The twins grabbed their coats.

"Will you be okay here by yourself?"

I forced a pretty good smile and shrugged. "Sure, I have my book to read."

"Okay, Sylv." He kissed the top of my head. "I'll look and see if they have any reading material I can bring you."

"That would be great, thanks"

They left and the twins stampeded down the hall as I turned the deadbolt. They would be a handful, but Dad could let them run and burn off some energy. Better on deck than in the cabin.