Just Between Friends (33 page)

     “Oh Steven,” she cried again as she embraced him once more, “I love you so much!”  Feeling how close she was pressed up against him, he felt the need for distance, and gently pulled free. 

     “Steven!”  She looked hurt.  “Didn’t you hear me say I love you?  You just pulled away.”

     Trying to make her understand, he apologized, “Miranda, I’m sorry.  You know I love you even more than life itself.”  Then lowering his voice to a whisper, he added, “But the way you was pressed up against me, well, you know what I mean, don’t you?”

     He knew she could never totally understand how he felt, what with all that burning desire he had been feeling lately.  Sometimes it seemed as if he could positively explode, especially when he was near her.  But he would respect her wishes to wait until their wedding night, even if it killed him, and in the meantime, she would have to understand his need for distance.

     “Yes, Steven, I suppose I do.  Please come in,” she invited with a hint of coolness in her tone.  She then motioned for him to have a seat on the sofa, and asked, “Can I get you anything?”

     Still detecting hurt in her voice, he reached up and took her left hand in his and pulled her down beside him, but she managed to keep a little space between them.  “Now, Miranda,” he pleaded, “don’t act like this.  Please, try to understand.  I’m doing my best to respect your wishes to wait until we’re married, but Darlin, whenever I’m near you, you drive me crazy.”

     She softened then.  “I’m sorry, Steven.  It’s just that this morning I had such a horrible nightmare.  I dreamed I was walking through some battlefield, and I was looking for you, but I couldn’t find you.  I had almost given up, when I saw you lying there.  As I made my way to you, I could see you were hurt.  I then knelt down over you, and all this blood was trickling down your face, and your eyes, Oh Steven, your eyes were open, staring at me.  It was then that I realized that you wasn’t just hurt, you was dead.  I woke myself up screaming.  Then realizing you never came over yesterday, I began to panic.  It took mama to get me calmed down.  Oh, Steven, it was awful.”

     Seeing the terror in her eyes, he reached out for her, forgetting about himself at this point.  His only concern was to console her.  “Shh, sweetheart, I’m here and I’m alive.”  She was weeping so uncontrollably, her whole body seemed to be convulsing.  “Miranda, please, I’m here now and the war is over.  We have the whole rest of our lives to be together.  I love you.”  He gathered her close and gently rocked her in his arms.

     When she had finally calmed, she pulled free from his embrace and looked into his eyes.  “I’m sorry I broke down like that.  It’s just that the dream seemed so real.  You see, I used to have these kinds of dreams all the time after … after …” she just couldn’t say it.  “Well, you know when.  Then the dreams stopped, and this morning was the first one I’ve had in over a year. I can only hope and pray that’s the last one I ever have again.”

      “They’ll stop, you’ll see, especially once we’re married and we can be together.  But if indeed by chance, you do have a bad dream, I’ll be right there to hold you in my arms, and comfort you.  Now enough about that, I’ve come to ask if you would like to go for a sleigh ride.  I brought pa’s.”

     Her face lit up as she exclaimed excitedly, “That would be so much fun!  Yes, I would love it!  But you know, I was so excited to see you that it didn’t even register to me that you had brought the sleigh.”

     “Well,” his eyes twinkled, “What are you waiting for?  Go get ready then we’ll be on our way.”

     She scurried to her feet, and announced, “I’ll be right back.”

     Still only late afternoon, as they drove off, Steven decided to take Miranda for a long ride, so they could view some scenery they were unused to seeing.  The sky still had a few clouds in them, but it seemed as though the snow had finally stopped.  As they snuggled under the blanket, they enjoyed the breathtaking view around them.

     Everywhere they looked the world seemed blanketed in snow.  It was so beautiful, Miranda thought.  It had been such a long time since she’d allowed herself the luxury of just enjoying the beauty of nature.  With the hopelessness of never seeing her beloved Steven again, nothing had seemed to matter.  Now she realized how much she had missed.  As a child, she loved winter.  The snow had always fascinated her.  She would sit for hours at a time by her window just watching it fall, reveling in the beauty of it.

     “Miranda,” Steven nudged her arm, “aren’t you enjoying yourself?  You’ve been so quiet.  I’m beginning to have my doubts.  We can turn back if you want.”

     “No, I’m not ready to go back yet, and I’m enjoying myself immensely.  This is all so mesmerizing to me.  You know how I’ve always been with the snow.”

     Steven suddenly pulled back on the reins, causing the horses to halt. He turned to face her, and slipping his arms around her waist, drew her close. He then lowered his lips to hers, and kissed her.  Gently at first, it then deepened.  As his tongue traced her teeth, he could feel her tremble.  As her teeth parted, his tongue entered her mouth, delving into the very depths. 
Oh, how he wished they were married already
.  When the kiss ended, they sat staring into each other’s eyes.  Steven knew at that moment he wasn’t alone in what he was feeling.  For that desire was burning brightly in her eyes also.

     Reaching out then, her hand shaking, Miranda declared as she touched his lips, “Steven, I know I shouldn’t be saying this.  It just isn’t proper for a woman, but feeling the way I do right now, I understand why you’ve kept your distance from me.  For if we were alone somewhere other than here, I’m not sure what might happen.”

     This took him totally by surprise. 
What was she saying?  Did she mean she actually wanted him to take her somewhere so they could be together?

     Then adding to what she already said, she remarked, “But a promise being a promise, I’m sure we can wait three more days.”  She sighed, “Even if it is going to be torture.”

     Although the tension between them was strong, they did their best to get their minds on other things.  The passing homesteads. The winter birds flying high above their heads, and the exquisite joy of having the privilege of just being together again.  They didn’t even notice as it began to grow darker, for it seemed much too early.  As Steven looked up, he didn’t like what he saw.  Black clouds had filled the sky, and the wind was beginning to pick up.

     Fear began to strike him as he remembered the big blizzard when he was only a child.  It had been a day such as this.  The sky had been fairly clear, when gradually it had grown dark.  Then the winds had come.  As he had peered out the window, his father was just leaving the barn, when suddenly he couldn’t see him any longer.  The snow had been so blinding and thick, everything outside was just a swirl of whiteness.  Frightened, he had run to his mother, who was in a panic.

     “Steven!”  She had cried, “Did you see any sign of your father?  He should have been back by now.”  Revealing to her what he had seen, she had frantically run to the back door.  Opening it, the wind nearly knocked her over.  Shutting it as quickly as possible, she began to cry.

     Steven had gone to her, trying his best to console her, as did Samantha.  As she had gathered them each in her arms, she only said, “Pray for your father, children.” 

     The blizzard had lasted all day and night without a sign of Arthur.  The next day after it had died down, their father returned, explaining how he had just been leaving the barn when it had hit, and couldn’t see to make his way back to the house.  So he had taken refuge in it.

     Fearing history could be about to repeat itself, Steven knew he had to get Miranda back safely.  That was his only concern.  Managing to keep his voice calm, he declared, “Baby, it looks like we may be in for some more snow.  I’m going to take you back now.”  Gathering the reins, he lightly tapped the horse’s backs as they trotted off in a slow gallop.

     Still being quite a distance from Miranda’s home, he tapped them a little harder, and they began to move more swiftly.  The wind was beating against their faces, causing them to sting.  He didn’t have time to get her back.  They were going to have to take shelter in one of these people’s homes.

     “Come on, Miranda,” he urged, as he removed the blanket from her lap.  “I don’t mean to frighten you, but we must seek shelter.”  He dismounted as quickly as possible then lifted her to the ground.  Taking his cane in one hand and her hand in the other, he began moving toward the nearest house.  They’d almost reached it, when suddenly it hit with such force, it nearly knocked them to the ground.  They were blinded.  Steven had felt Miranda’s hand as it slipped from his.  Now it was impossible to see where she was.

     “Miranda, where are you?” But only silence followed.  “Miranda!” he screamed frantically, as the wind nearly took his breath.  He searched and searched, but nothing.

     Making out just a small dimness of light from the house, in which they had been heading, he started walking toward it the best he could.  He had to find someone who could help him.  Suddenly he struck something solid.  It was the house, he was almost certain.  Banging on it as loudly as possible, he could only pray someone would answer.

     When the door swung open, a few feet to the right of him, he could barely make out a figure.  “Is someone out there?”  He heard them call, their voice quite broken as the wind struck at them.

     Keeping his hands pressed against the wall, he crept slowly toward the door.  They were about to close it when he yelled, “Please, I need your help.”  As he reached them, he practically fell into the doorway, and his cane fell to the floor.  The wind had already blown snow into their home, covering the kitchen rug.  As quickly as they could, they managed to get it closed.

     For a moment Steven couldn’t speak.  He could only gasp for breath.  When it finally returned, he spoke with utmost urgency, “My girlfriend is out there somewhere.  Her hand was in mine when we were torn apart as the blizzard hit.  I can’t find her.  I’ve called and called, and she doesn’t answer.  Please, can you help me?”

     The man that stood before him was very rugged.  He never noticed until now.  His hair was rather long and shaggy and he had a full red beard.  He could also see several scars on his face.  He was a tall man, but rather thin.  He looked to be about his age.  Steven reasoned to himself that the scars, as did his, probably came from the war also.  The man seemed to be wasting no time as he left the room then promptly returned carrying his winter clothing.

     A very petite woman, who looked to be about nineteen or twenty, came bounding in the room behind him carrying a child of no more than a year and a half.  “Isaac, what’s going on?  Where are you going?”  Upon noticing Steven, she became immediately quiet.

     “Nora, this man needs my help.  His woman is out there in this blizzard, and we have to find her.”  Steven could tell how shy she was, for she only nodded as her face grew red.  As they were about to leave the house, he picked up three lanterns, and lit them and handed one to Steven.  Then sitting one in the window, he turned to her and assured her, “Don’t be frightened, honey.  I’ll be fine.”  Then opening the door once more as he fought the wind, Steven followed Isaac into the blinding swirling whiteness.

     Not having a clue as to which direction to go, he just said a silent prayer and headed out, while Isaac went the opposite way.  Fighting his way through the storm, he wondered how he could possibly find her.  She could be anywhere.  But if she wasn’t found soon, he sickeningly realized, it may be too late.

     Turning his head every so often to make sure he could still see the light in Isaac’s window, he proceeded on.  It was growing so cold.  “Oh Miranda, please don’t do this to me,” he spoke aloud.  “I can’t lose you after all we’ve been through.  Oh baby just three more days.”  The wind took his breath again.  Turning his face in another direction, he waited a moment then yelled for her once more, but nothing.

     His faith was beginning to dampen.  After calling her name over and over, he began to retrace his steps the best he could, when suddenly he stumbled over something, something soft and rather big to be laying on the ground.  It made a noise.  Holding the lantern as close to it as possible, he could see that it was a person.

     Sitting the lantern down, he gathered her in his arms, saying, “Miranda, say something.”  She only groaned.  Having no cane to help him walk, for in his haste, he had left it behind, and no light to shine before them, he could only rely on the very faint fire glowing in the window of Isaacs home.  Nestling her face against his chest to block the wind from her, he slowly proceeded on.