Just Between Friends (32 page)

     He apologized, “Sam, you know I was only kidding around with you.  I know you two haven’t had much time yet, but it’ll happen, you’ll see, probably before you even realize it.  Just be prepared for when it does.”  He then returned the kiss she had given him earlier, and replied, “I’m starved.  Hurry up with that, will you?”

     “Oh, you,” She exclaimed, as she swatted him with the turner.  “Just go back over there and sit down. Have some patience my dear brother, patience.  I’m working as fast as I can.”

     Obeying her orders, he returned to his seat, pretending to be hurt, but laughing inside thinking,
such a bossy little thing.  I
feel sorry for Alec
.  He didn’t really feel that way, for he knew Alec was a very lucky man to have won the heart of his sister.  Maybe he was prejudiced, but he didn’t think so.  Sam was a most amazing woman.  He longed to see her happy.

     After she had finished preparing the meal, and handed him the plate of hotcakes, eggs and bacon, she sat across the table from him picking at her own food.  She had never been one to eat much, but this morning it seemed she was even having a hard time taking a first bite.  Knowing something was on her mind, he demanded, “Alright, Sam.  Are you going to tell me what’s bothering you or not?”

     She looked up at him with her big blue eyes, and he detected a hint of worry in them.  “How did you know something was bothering me?”

     “Sam, I am your brother, aren’t I?  And brothers have a way of knowing things.”

     Seeming hesitant as she thought about this, she then pushed her meal aside, before she spoke.  “Steven, I’ve just been worried about Sarah.  Not her health or anything.  It’s about her relationship with Alec.  She loves him so much.  But it still hurts a little knowing she never had a chance to know her real father.  I want her to know her true roots.  In all the time Sarah’s been born, Michaels parents have only seen her twice.  Maybe it hurts them seeing her, for she does resemble Michael.  I try to keep him fresh in her mind, so she’ll feel she knows him at least a little.”

     Steven sat in silence as he watched Sam’s face.  She had become silent, while she was still trying to process what she was feeling into words.  She was having a hard time talking about Michael.  As much as she loved Alec, Michael would always be a part of her and Sarah’s lives, as of course he should be. 

     She took a deep breath before she spoke, “Michael’s dead, but I want a piece of him to live on in Sarah’s mind, because that’s all she can ever have.  Now don’t get me wrong, I love Alec with all my heart, but I just don’t want Sarah to totally lose her father.  He would have been so proud of her.  You understand what I’m trying to tell you, don’t you?”

     Steven could sympathize with her, knowing he would feel the same way if anything were ever to happen to Miranda.  He couldn’t even bear that thought.  It made him positively heartsick.  So answering her as carefully as possible, he said, “Of course I do Sam.  You and Michael loved each other very much, and Sarah is the product of that love.  Don’t you worry Michael will always’ live on in Sarah.  Just keep telling her about him.  Don’t ever give that up for anything.  Alec will understand.”

     “Do you really think he would?  I’m sure it would bother him at least a little.”

     “Sam, Alec has gone through a lot also.  If he had a child and never had the chance to see it grow up, I’m sure he would want someone to tell it about him.  I know I would.  What I would encourage you to do, if you have any doubts, is to have a talk with him.  You’ll see, you’ve done all this fretting over nothing.”

     He noticed how the worry was lessening on her face, so he gathered up his dishes, before standing to his feet.  Dishes in one hand, cane in the other, he limped to the sink and stacked them together.  He turned back to his sister, and explained, “Now, I don’t mean to be rude, but I promised pa I would help him cut wood today.  If I get an early enough start, maybe I will have time to go over and see Miranda for a little while.  As soon as the weather breaks, I’m going to pay O’Leary a call and see if he’ll give me a job.  I so want to build us a house as soon as I possibly can.”

     “I’m so happy for you Steven and for Miranda also. I wish you could have seen how distraught she was when they sent word that you had been killed.  Well, I guess I can’t say I actually saw her, for she kept to herself, refusing to go anywhere, even church.  But we heard talk.  At first no-one could get her to show any emotion at all, then one day she claimed to hear your voice, and she seemed to get better, at least for a little while.  But as time passed, that hope began to dwindle.  It’s amazing how she kept holding on, determined not to give up on you, even when she was engaged to Alec.  I suppose that’s why it never worked out between them.”

     Steven so longed to tell Sam of the strange connection he, and Miranda had shared when he was away, but he couldn’t.  That was their special secret, too special in fact, to be shared with anyone else.  “I know,” he finally remarked, “and I’m so glad she waited on me.  I can’t even imagine the devastation I would have felt if I had returned and found her married.  But I won’t allow myself to think about that.”

     Pushing his chair back against the table, he proclaimed one last thing before leaving the room.  “It’s our turn now Sam, yours and mine.  We deserve some happiness after all we’ve been through, don’t you agree?”

     Her face lit up, as she nodded,   “Yes, I do, little brother, yes, I do.” 

                                           ***

     The sound of cannon fire filled the air.  Men were lying all about.  The stench of death would fill your nostrils.  The smoke was dense, making it very hard to see even a few feet in front of you.  The agonizing cries of the wounded seemed to be all around, but she couldn’t find him.  She had searched it seemed for hours, but to no avail.  She had to find him.  So, she kept pushing forward.  Only about ten feet away, she saw a figure lying there, unmoving, a figure which strongly resembled him.  Making her way past a couple more bodies, she finally reached the figure.

     Bending down, she gasped, clutching her mouth.  Oh please, no!  Blood was trickling down both sides of his face, and his eyes were wide open as if he was staring straight into her soul, but he was dead.

     Giving a gut piercing scream, she sat bolt upright in her bed.  Tears were streaming down her face, and she had broken out in a cold sweat.  Hearing, her mother had come running.

     Opening her bedroom door, she rushed to her daughter’s side and gathered her in her arms.  It had been such a long time since Miranda had had one of these nightmares that Mary had thought they wouldn’t return, especially now that Steven had come home.

     Miranda nestled close against her mother, as Mary stroked her daughter’s hair and comforted her.  “Shh honey, it’s alright.  It was only a bad dream.  Remember, Steven is back and he’s fine.  You’re to be married in only three days.”

     “But Mama,” Miranda shivered, “It was so awful.  Steven was lying there with blood all over his face, and even though he was dead, his eyes were open, and it seemed he was staring right at me.  Oh Mama, will these dreams ever end?”

     Pulling free from her mother’s embrace, she began to panic, “I must see him!  He didn’t come over yesterday!  What if something happened?”

     Pushing the covers aside, she began to rise, when her mother stopped her.  “Honey, Steven’s fine or else we would have heard.  Besides, you can’t go over there on a day like this.  It’s been snowing and there’s nearly a half foot of it on the ground.”

     Miranda knew her mother was right, but her desire to see Steven was outweighing her good sense.  “But,” she argued, “you don’t understand, I have to see him!”

     Unable to resist her, Mary reasoned,  “Look, Miranda, I’ll tell you what, you be patient until your father returns home from work, and if Steven hasn’t shown up by that time, then I’ll convince him to take you over there to check on him, alright?”

     Realizing her father could be home quite late, being the town’s blacksmith, she was hesitant to agree.  But she reasoned to herself and concluded she really didn’t have any other choice.  It would be far too risky to drive there herself in this kind of weather.  So reluctantly, she agreed.

     “Good, it’s settled then,” Mary said happily.  “You go ahead and get dressed, then come downstairs and eat something, and as soon as Tommy wakes up, he’ll help keep your mind off things.”

      As if on cue, the baby began to cry.  Mary stood to her feet, and headed for the door, but quickly turned back to Miranda, and said, “Come on, your little brother will help keep your mind off things.”  Then added, “Just be patient honey, I know Steven is fine.  Now hurry up.”

     “Oh Mama,” she whispered, “you just don’t know what it feels like, do you?  Papa has always been there.  You’ve never had to feel that heartbreak of losing the one you love, and I’m truly thankful you haven’t.”  Then deciding her mother was right about putting her mind on other things, she quickly dressed, and after making her bed and tidying her room, her stomach was starting to settle.  So she made her way downstairs and waited.
                                             

                                           ***

     The scenery outside
was beautiful, a work of art.  Everything was white, it seemed.  The branches on the trees hung low across the road, leading to Miranda’s house.  Tilting his face upward, Steven thought they were breathtaking.  The snow, for the moment, had finally stopped.  It wasn’t quite as cold as it had been the last two days, so he determined to take Miranda for a ride in their sleigh.  If she agreed, that is, and he felt quite certain she would, for she always had enjoyed it so much when they were younger.  It would almost feel like old times again.

     Now mid-afternoon, as he pulled into her drive, he dismounted as quickly as was possible for him, then taking his cane in hand, walked to the front porch.  But before he even reached the door, it swung open and Miranda rushed out to meet him.

     “Steven!”  She exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around his neck.  “I’m so happy you’re here!  I’ve been so worried!”

     Not expecting such a welcome, he gloried in the feel of her in his arms, as he pulled her close.  When she finally pulled away, she was crying.  Gently wiping away her tears, he asked, “Miranda baby, why are you crying, and also, why such a welcome?”

     Seeing her teeth begin to shatter, he advised, as he took her arm, “Let’s go in, then you can explain.”  She didn’t object.  When they entered the house, he quickly shut the door as he saw Mary standing there with Tommy in her arms.

     “Good afternoon, Mrs. Porter,” he greeted, as he reached for his hat then placed it on the hook, that hung on the wall by the door.

     “Good afternoon, Steven.  Am I ever glad to see
you.”  Miranda narrowed her eyes at her mother, but she pretended not to notice.  Seeing the puzzled expression on his face, she added, “It’s a long story.  Miranda will explain.”

     Walking over to Tommy, he declared, as he reached out and touched the baby’s hair, “I have to admit, this little fella sure took me by surprise.  When I first heard him cry, when I was still in hiding, my heart seemed to drop right out of me.  I know I shouldn’t have been spying, but I had to see Miranda.  It served me right, I guess.  She and Alec were sitting outside on the porch swing, and were kissing.”

     He looked over at Miranda then, and saw her face flush, but still, he continued, “When all at once I heard a baby cry.  I then saw Miranda hurry inside, and I was sure it was hers and Alec’s, and that they were married.  I left with a very sorrowful heart that day.  But I still kept coming back, feeling the need to know everything.  After about four trips, I heard you talking to Mr. Porter about Tommy.  He was talking about his plans for his son when he grew up.  Why, the relief that washed over me that day, I can’t possibly describe.  Knowing how much you both always wanted a son, I couldn’t have been happier.”

     “Thank you, Steven.  That means a lot to me, and he is such a good little guy, but he’s sleepy.  I was just on my way upstairs to put him down for a nap.  So if you’ll excuse me, I’ll leave the two of you alone.”  Not waiting for an answer, she hurried up the stairs.

     Facing Miranda once more, he felt curious.  “What’s going on, baby?  Why was everyone so relieved to see me?”